TDI: Heroes Versus Villains
by janey1097
Summary: Wawanakwa's got a new, exciting competition on the docket: twelve Total Drama heroes against twelve villains! Campers are plucked from all over the interweb. Inside: the hiatus ends, but Chris is ready to scrap the old contestants and get new ones. That is unless some pirates, veterans, exiles, and a reality-warping laptop have anything to say about it.
1. Infamy's Perks

_(A.N.) __"Oh goodness, not this again."_

Hey everybody! This is a new story, co-authored with Kitsune818—major credit goes to him. And let me make this clear—_**the contestants have already been chosen--but they could be yours. **_These are heroes and villains from past seasons already created, hence the name. Anyways, enjoy, and I apologize for the copious amount of dialog in this chapter.

* * *

For Total Drama Island, there have always been the standout 'good' guys and 'bad' guys. Rest assured, people weren't walking around, appraising the camera, and announcing: "Hey, I'm evil," but for some folks, they might have well.

The bad have come in many different forms: the queen bees, the crazy psychos, the loud-mouthed rebellious types, or the people who made you want to throttle them--who cares if they're fictional?

The good have also had their discrepancies: the quiet, brooding folks, the peppy but friendly girls, the brave, heroic boys, and Owen, who gets a category all to himself.

With all these contestants that have ever graced the Total Drama stage (the number is in the hundreds) it's hard to keep track of them all. It's difficult to remember names, especially if you're pulling contestants from all sorts of different seasons, and combining them together for a heroes-versus-villains escapade.

"Hey! You, intern—yeah, you! Do you have my sheet of paper—y'know, the one that has all the contestants' names on it?"

Then again, it helps if you have a cheat sheet.

A red-faced intern handed Chris McLean a small slip of paper before ducking away, out of the view of the camera. Chris, standing on the Dock of Shame, skimmed over the paper, nodding to himself and mumbling incorrect pronunciations of the contestants' names.

"Twenty-four campers?" Chris complained to himself, scowling, "I don't even remember half these people. How many seasons have we had now, anyways? Double digits, I think…"

"Chris," an impatient voice called, from behind the camera, "we're rolling."

"Oh fine," Chris continued to grumble. He shoved the cheat sheet in his pocket in a not-so-stealthy fashion, and gave the camera his trademark dazzling grin.

"Yo, dudes! We're coming at you live from Camp Wawanakwa. This is Chris McLean, your favorite TV host, dropping the next season of the hit Total Drama series! You may remember past season such as Camp TV, Total Drama: Again, and Total Drama Crazy. We've had an excess of awesome competitors, and a handful of winners. Well, it's time to start again, but with a twist.

"This time, we've hand-picked all of our contestants from past seasons. We've matched up twelve of the noblest heroes against twelve of the most notorious villains, and are pitting them against each other in the most epic battle of 'good vs. evil' ever in TD history! So get ready, because this is Total Drama Island, Heroes... versus... Villains!"

Chris clapped his hands together, as if trying to get the attention of a rowdy class. "Alright! So, we've got twenty-four campers for this season, twelve villains, and twelve heroes. Six of each gender on each team. We've cherry-picked the best—and for that matter, the _worst_—too. Now, I'm sure you all recognize this place, right?"

He gestured towards the scenery around him—Camp Wawanakwa, AKA: the place where dreams die. Nothing had changed, really. The camera went through a few flashes of the place: green foliage, the cabins, creepy red eyes staring from the forest, and Chef, who was wearing a pink, bedazzled **(1)** dress. Chef threw a ladle at the camera.

"Our contestants will stay here for…how ever long I feel like it," Chris informed the audience, with a 'let's-kick-a-puppy' smile to top it off. "Our contestants aren't arriving today, but you should probably know who you're gonna have to watch this whole season, so…" Chris whipped out his cheat sheet and started from the top of the list.

"Let's start with the heroes!

"Seth Fujimoto—as seen in: 'Camp TV'. Seth is a karate expert, nicknamed the 'Chopper', and is overall a good, friendly guy. Dude, this sounds like something off a dating website…

"Riley Silver—as seen in: 'Camp TV'. Riley is Seth's love interest, and is a spunky gamer who's loyal to her friends. She's not the only 'Riley' this season, actually, so we either have to call her 'Riley S.' or 'Riley-the-girl'. Or 'Ramdor'.

"Mozart Squiteri—as seen in 'Total Drama Again'. Mozart is a relaxed rocker, and is pretty tolerant of everyone—aside from, apparently, stalker girls. Oh man, do I feel for you there…

"Aaron Something-something-something," Chris squinted at the paper. "Whatever this dude's last name is **(2)**…?" With a shrug of defeat, Chris continued. "Anyways, Aaron was also from 'Total Drama Again'. He's a humorous skirt-chaser, a regular Casanova…

"Jessica Skidmore—another one from 'Total Drama Again'. She's a tough skater girl, and is kind of assuming, but is brave and loyal to her friends. Oh boy, but when she gets a grudge…!

"Rosetta Hawthorne—from 'TDI, Season Two!'. Uh, Rosetta is a bit…temperamental…but she's strong-willed and a good teacher. Wait, '_good teacher'_? What the heck? This isn't a job interview!

"Bren Tenkage—previously from 'Total Drama Island: Again'. Bren is a strong camper, physically and mentally, and…is overall a good guy…I guess…

"Kathleen 'Kit-Kat' McCartney, seen from 'Total Drama Island: Again!', is a cookie-baking chick who thinks in pink and blue. She like, freaks out if she upsets anyone…it's pretty entertaining, actually.

"Glisa Hernandez, also from 'Total Drama Island: Again!', is our Spanglish-speaking party animal! She's a fun, loud _niña__,_ and will have people taking out Spanish-to-English dictionaries all over the country!

"Damion Flawson hails from 'Total Drama Island Starring YOU!', and is all about his friends—although, frankly, he can blurt out some very stupid things, man…like criticizing Eva's clothing!

"Demi Johnson is linked with 'Total Drama Island Starring YOU!', and is a self-proclaimed weirdo, which should tell you enough. But other then that, she's a quiet, Gothic novelist.

"Finally we have Yami, Long—Long being his first name, that is. Long comes from 'Total Drama Accel', and is a quiet, intelligent fellow, who has a pet fox Kitsune that he will not stop petting."

Chris exhaled, clearly exhausted, but he grins towards the camera once more.

"Now, for the more entertaining portion, the villains…

"Lola Linford, straight out of 'Camp TV'. A regular queen bee, the queen bee to hail over queen bees, Lola didn't even care about her brother's welfare! With underhanded tricks and slights, Lola is sure to be hated by everyone in a fifty-mile radius. Great!

"Logan Dale, hailing from 'Camp TV', is the resident bad boy, the delinquent—but he has a spot that's as soft as uncooked dough. (To warn you, though, that spot's mostly reserved for cute girls.)

"Chelsea Richey, from 'Total Drama Again', is our next villain. She's a spunky pyromaniac with some slight socializing difficulties. She tends to get ticked off easily, and well…she's just very, very loud.

"Riley Fox is next, and he returns from 'TDI, Season Two!'. He's a cocky, sardonic, manipulative genius. He's not much of an athlete, but compensates with an ego that's bigger than the money Goldman Sachs ripped off!

"Laura Doopliss is our next contestant, and is another villain from 'TDI, Season Two!'. She's as shallow as a kiddy pool, and her attitude runs as hot and cold as a broken gym shower!"

(This story is brought to you by similes: _fun for the whole family_!)

"Arlen Fritz is coming to us from 'Total Drama Winter'. He's a self-proclaimed 'gangster'," at this, Chris made a really ridiculous MC Hammer gesture, "and litters his speech with innuendos and jibes at others.

"Jack Bishop is our first villain from 'Total Drama Island Starring YOU!'. He's a thieving jerk, and is excellent friends with our next villain…

"And that man would be Isaac Clark, another fellow from 'Total Drama Island Starring YOU!'. Isaac is rough and tough, and would probably punch me in the face for rhyming.

"Next villain, Zane Selleck, is coming to us from 'Total Drama the New Challenge'. Zane is a bitter, lonely, bookworm fellow. He's rather sarcastic, also…

"From the same vein as Zack is Zarya, our other villain from 'Total Drama the New Challenge'. Zarya is a bitter, lonely chickadee…ergo, perfect match for Zane!

"Sienna Van Der Woodsen is our female fatale from 'Total Drama Island: Again!'. She's snide, and a bit cruel, but surprisingly enough for a queen bee like her, she's had her good moments…

"Finally, we have Lacey Merceau, who also comes from 'Total Drama Island: Again!'! She's the nonconformist—the rebellious type—who gets loud when the situation calls for it." Chris smirked. "And, sometimes, when it doesn't…"

With this long introduction over with, Chris walked down the length of the Dock of Shame, and sashayed his way towards the Wawanakwa campsite.

(_Confession Cam: We just wanted to use the word 'sashayed_'.)

Chris McLean: "The contestants will wail and moan in here—this handy little outhouse. Thankfully, they'll do most of their complaining in here, so we won't have to hear it."

When the static cleared, Chris was seated on a folding chair, on the beach, donning sunglasses and a god-awful Hawaiian **(3)** shirt.

"Yo!" He greeted the unseen audience. "We've almost got our extensive intro done with…next time you see us, we'll actually have something going on. We think. In any case, we leave you with a few closing statements…Chef, can you help us?"

The camera switched to Chef, who was wearing a military outfit and pointing a frightening finger at the camera.

"HEY!" He barked. "Let me lay down some starting points, which we have no way of enforcing!

"First of all—we are not accepting new applications! Those contestants Chris went over? That was IT! E-E-T, it!

"Second of all--" Chef's angry face became angrier, somehow, "follow the footnotes for what we want you to send in, or re-send!" **(4)**

"And third of all--" Chef took a breath, and then paused, trying to think of a rule to finish his rant with. "Third of all…Jon Stewart definitely beats out Bernie Goldberg."

Chef leered at the camera, and cracked his knuckles, and then his neck. (And then his knee, his elbow, his chin, his esophagus, and the knuckles of the nearest intern.)

"Well then, what are you waiting for?" He shouted at the camera, flailing his arms like the madman he was. "Move maggots, move!"

* * *

_(A.N.) __Well…there you go?_

_ Anyways, time to give credit where credit is due!_

Heroes:  
Seth Fujimoto (kitsune818), Bren Tenkage (Bren Tenkage), Jess Skidmore (SouthParkCraigLover), Riley Silver (Shikamaru's Twin), Damion Flawson (Simply-Dakota), Mozart "Mo" Squiteri (Black Cat of Arda), Aaron (insert last name here) (reavensreplica), Kathleen McCartney (Noire Ballerina), Yami Long (Kunnaki), Glisa Hernandez (One Black Rose), Demi Johnson (ILoveZeroKiryu), Rosetta Hawthorne (me).

Villains:

Chelsea Richey (Psycho-Pyro-Maniac), Lola Linford (author999), Zane Selleck (ultimateTORINOR), Logan Dale (realityshowfan), Jack Bishop (Can't Spell Beautiful), Isaac Clark (Can't Spell Beautiful), Zarya Sashura (smartnsporty), Sienna Van Der Woodsen (GossipQueen101), Arlen Fritz (Disney Princess Dani), Lacey Merceau (Ktd123), Riley Fox (Me), and Laura Doopliss (BroadwayBabe4).

As for the stories, here's what we've got:

Camp TV by beautifulxlife, Total Drama: Again by CamperThirteen, Total Drama Island: Again by Ktd123, Total Drama Winter by Just Another Fanatic, Total Drama Island starring YOU! by smartnsporty, Total Drama the New Challenge by ultimateTORINOR, and Total Drama Accel by HouroftheRaven.

Okay, yeah, that's everything on that account.

(1) I'm seriously alarmed they didn't count 'bedazzled' as a misspelled word.

(2) Well, he had no given last name…

(3) Hawaiian is officially the hardest word to spell. I was rather frustrated and too prideful to submit to 'spell-check'.

(4) First of all--congrats if you got picked! And thanks to kistune818, I didn't have to any of the star-searching. Anyways, for those who were chosen, I'd really appreciate it if you could re-send your camper's appearance (in case you tweaked anything), fears, talents, history (competition-wise and otherwise), and which campers they would like & dislike.

Many thanks for tolerating this insanity!

-Janey1097


	2. Twelve of One, a Dozen of the Other

_ (A.N.) _Thanks to everyone for the reviewing and whatnot!

…and, well, that's about all I have to say up here.

Oh, just one little mechanics thing: for this story, the confession cam reads like a script in a play. When the character does a particular thing in the confession cam, it'll be put in parenthesis, italics, and present tense.

On with the story!

At Wawanakwa, the temperature was starting to peak into the low nineties—and it was sunny enough to make an Irishman cry. It was the kind of day normal people would spend inside. Then again, when it comes to Total Drama Island, normality is entertainment's younger, uglier, brother.

Chris McLean was once again on his favorite spot, the rickety Dock of Shame, where twenty-four different cruise ships would deposit two dozen campers—including one future winner. Soon, the show would have twelve heroes and twelve villains, each of them mentally scarred in their own special ways.

"Let's get this show on the road!" Chris ordered, with an enthusiastic grin of cheerleading proportions. "They'll be arriving soon, one at a time. The order is pretty random, so don't get psychoanalytic on us, alright?"

True to his words, a white cruise ships peaked its way into the camera frame, and out hopped the first contestant of the season.

She was tall, that much was for certain—not 'Green Giant' height, but she was up there. Her black hair had a bizarre, silver streak in it, and her apparel consisted of a Jack Skellington T-shirt, cargo pants, and red-black arm warmers. She gave the camera a relaxed smile and a mock, two-fingered salute.

"Ramdor!" Chris greeted her.

"Ramdor?" the girl repeated, clearly confused.

"Riley S.," Chris corrected himself. "How's our first hero doing?"

"Not too shabby," Riley S. replied, smiling at the host. She gave him an inquisitive look. "Wait, why the last initial? I'm not the only Riley?"

"Not this season," Chris admitted, with a nod. "Thank God you two are different genders; pronouns would be a nightmare with you two. Go and stand over there, there's gonna be three others from your neck of the woods." Riley S. nodded and did as she was told, but called out to ask:

"Who else from 'Camp TV' is coming?"

"You'll just have to wait and find out!" Chris told her. With a little chuckle, he added: "Spoiler alert—_one of them is Lola_!"

"_What_?!" Riley S. shouted, positively fuming at the mention of her conniving rival. She wasn't able to rant any farther, though—contestant number two was already on the dock.

She was very pretty—with a slender frame and wavy brown hair. Her chocolate-colored eyes gave the scene the once-over, and the girl sighed, with a touch of disgust.

"Another one of my stupid agent's 'brilliant' ideas…" she muttered, mostly to herself. "How could coming back _here_ help me?"

"Well, there's the million dollar cash prize," Chris quipped, popping next to Sienna, the first villain. "That's always a plus. And there are the wonderful bonds you make with all the other campers."

There was a short pause.

"But mostly the cash part?" Sienna guessed.

"Yes," Chris sighed. "Go over and stand by Riley S., alright?" Sienna did so, and the two campers glanced at each other. Riley S. gave Sienna a small, awkward smile, but Sienna just turned away, focusing her attention on the newcomers.

Next was Seth, a mullet-donning karate student who seemed to be in a good enough mood. His eyes and hair were brown, and he wore a red T-shirt with jeans.

Sienna chuckled, lightly. "Lacey would have _so_ much material to use on this moron…"

Riley S. shot a glare at the girl, but didn't speak up.

"Chopper!" Chris greeted Seth by his nickname as he walked towards the host. The two bumped fist like guys…usually do? "Nice to see you again, man!"

"Same here!" Seth proclaimed. "It's good to be back—oh!" He exclaimed, seeing the contestants on the other side of the dock. "Riley, hey! How are you?"

"Pretty good," Riley S. replied, but she didn't seem sure.

_(Confession Cam: The pack-mule for emotional baggage)_

_ Riley S.—_"So, I got in a fight with Lola in my last season, and Seth…well, he just stood there and watched and gawked. I'm still…a little ticked off.

_Seth—_"This whole 'hero' label has me nervous. I did some things I'm not so proud of last season…"

Riley S. and Seth continued to have a semi-conversation, while Sienna crossed her arms and scowled, impatiently.

"Arlen, our signature bad-boy!" Chris started to announce, as contestant number four dropped in. Arlen wore black pants that were so low and loose his red boxers could be seen, so a ridiculous reference was almost made (yet again) **(1)**. Arlen also sported a tight, army-print shirt, a sideways baseball cap, and many pierced body parts. His messy hair was the color of rust.

"Huh," Arlen remarked, walking straight past Chris without much acknowledgment. "I guess coming here is better than freezing my ass off in Alaska…" He strode over to the other three contestants.

"You must be the villain from 'Total Drama Winter', right?" Seth guessed, smiling. "That's pretty cool, being the only one chosen from there."

"Hm," Arlen grunted in response, appraising Seth, dully. "That's right. Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Seth," he introduced himself. "I'm from 'Camp TV'. This is my…um…friend, Riley."

Arlen turned towards Riley S., giving her an incredulous look, namely at her silver streak. "Nice hair," said Arlen, with a touch of sarcasm.

Riley's eyebrows lowered. "Nice boxers."

"Agreed," Sienna deadpanned. "There's easier way's to get noticed than showing the world your rocket-ship underpants." Arlen looked annoyed at first at the crack, but once he saw who had spoken, his scowl turned into a crooked grin, as he looked at Sienna with approval.

"I'll rock _your_ ship _any_ day," Arlen informed Sienna, slyly, as he scooted towards her. Sienna raised an eyebrow, and shook her head, rolling her eyes to herself.

"Did that even make _sense_?" Riley S. asked Seth, who shrugged feebly in response. The sound of Chris's voice grabbed the four teens' attention.

"Here's our third hero…Damion Flawson!"

Damion stepped onto the dock, sporting spiky, burgundy hair and dark blue eyes. He wore a blue recycling T-shirt, ripped jeans, and neon shoes.

"Alright!" He cheered, grinning amiably and striking a Superman-esque pose of sorts. "This season's gonna be great!"

"Curb the enthusiasm dude," Chris warned, wagging a finger at the teen. "Optimism is about as popular as Chef."

"Well then…" Damion frowned, reconsidering his opening statement. "This place…smells funny."

"That was…closer!" Chris congratulated, giving Damion a pat on the back. Pleased, Damion went over to the other contestants, shaking all their hands and asking them questions about themselves, much to the slight confusion of the others.

_(Confession Cam: More questions than answers)_

_ Sienna—_"This dude was actually being nice…I mean honestly, who _does_ that?" _(She gives the camera a disbelieving look.)_

The next villain dropped on the dock, and was introduced as Logan, and he had a bit of a 'HULK SMASH!' vibe to him. A red bandana kept his shaggy red hair out of his eyes, and some were certain that his muscles had muscles. He wore a leather jacket (sans a shirt underneath) and ripped jeans.

"Hey, Logan!" Chris greeted the new camper. "Dude, did you get scarier over the past few months?"

Logan raised an eyebrow. "I hit the weights, if that's what you mean." He walked over to the other contestants, who gave him a variety of different looks.

Sienna just slapped her forehead. "Great," she complained. "We've got one without a shirt," she remarked, jutting a finger at Logan, "and one who's _pretty darn close_ to losing his pants." She jerked her head towards Arlen.

"And what's with all these ripped jeans?" Riley S. wondered to herself. "It's like their pants were assaulted by pairs of scissors." Damion, with a blush, gave a tiny grin at Logan's abs.

_(Confession Cam: The plural of 'fashion faux pas' would be…?)_

_ Damion—_"Oh jeez, well I hope I'm not sounding shallow but you have to admit, those abs were impressed. _(He pauses for a moment.) _"Oh, right, I suppose you might not know I'm gay. Did I forget to mention that? _(He grins sheepishly.)_

"Ah, sweetheart," Logan taunted, running a hand through his hair. "If you want me to follow army-boy's suit over there, all you need to do is ask."

_(Confession Cam: Second impressions)_

_ Damion—(Rolls his eyes.) _"And then I heard him speak."

_Seth—_"Well, you know what they say…light travels faster than sound, that's why some people appear bright…that is, before they start _talking_. Man, I thought Logan had shaped up a bit sense last season."

_Riley S.—_"Logan started out like this last season, but he sort of changed…but now he's reverted again? Eh, I dunno. I don't like the looks of him though, now. He seems…rougher. If that makes any sense.

Sienna smirked and turned away from the provocative teenager—meanwhile, Arlen and Logan struck up a conversation as the next hero was introduced.

"Next up is Glisa!"

Glisa was a short, tan Mexican, with red-brown hair and hazel eyes. She wore a colorful top, slim jeans, brown cowboy boots and a white cowboy hat.

"_Bienvenidos_, Glisa!" Chris cheered as the party animal gave him a high five and a whoop.

"Hey-_hey_, Chris!" Glisa responded enthusiastically. "Dis season's gonna be _muy loco_!"

"What was that about enthusiasm, Chris?" Damion questioned, tapping his chin in mock pondering.

"Well," Chris replied, with a guilty grin, "her stereotype _is_ 'the party animal'…"

Glisa hopped over to Damion, and gave him a cheerful grin. Damion grinned on right back.

"So…" Damion questioned. "Are you more for high-fives or handshakes?"

"High-fives, amigo!"

Unsurprisingly, the two did just that.

"So," Seth questioned suddenly, as he turned towards Logan, "what have you been up since--"

Logan raised a threatening fist. "Don't even mention 'Camp TV', dude." Seth put his hands up, defensively.

"Touchy subject?" questioned Riley S.

"I don't wanna talk about it!"

"It couldn't have been that bad, right?" Arlen asked Logan, because the former couldn't recall that season.

"_I said I don't wanna talk about it_!"

"Yeah," Riley S. commented dryly, "we got that part."

_(Confession Cam: Wanna talk about it?)_

_ Logan—_"I got beat out by a girl during 'Camp TV', and I can't stand reliving that embarrassment. No way I'm gonna make my same mistakes again. I'm getting an alliance as soon as I can."

"Let's give it up for the next villain: Zarya!"

Zarya had wavy, brown hair and slightly tan skin. She wore a black tank top that had a picture of a rose on it, and faded blue jeans. Zarya was slim, and tall, and she had ocean blue eyes.

She slunk past Chris without as much as a word, and took her place next to the contestants, in silence.

"Zarya, huh?" Glisa questioned, curiously. "Where might dat name be from?"

Zarya gave Glisa a bleak look, before turning away and mumbled something that sounded like: "Russia."

"Not much of a talker, are you?" Sienna guessed blindly.

"Is there any way to answer that question?" questioned a newcomer. The current competitors turned to see who the arriving camper was.

She was a bit of a shortie, and had highlighted, burgundy red hair. Her skin was pale, and her eyes were a gray-green color. She wore a gray, short-sleeved shirt, a black bomber jacket, black jeans, and black boots that did, thankfully, give her a few inches.

"Lacey!" Chris introduced the contestant, but scowled instantaneously. "You're not supposed to speak before I am!"

"Well, I'm a maverick," Lacey laughed, and her grin grew when she saw a familiar face at the other end of the dock. "Hey, Sienna."

"Lacey," Sienna replied, with a small smirk. "Finally, someone who's not an idiot or a weirdo."

"We're standing right here…" Zarya muttered quietly.

"Well, we are in the 'villain' label," Lacey pointed out as she went over to the contestants. She threw an arm around Zarya; much to the latter's major discomfort. "We've gotta get in the role!"

"…please stop touching me…" was the only thing the quiet one said.

"Ladies and gentlemen, our next hero: Kathleen, AKA: 'Kit-Kat!'"

"Yes!" Lacey cheered, once hearing the name of a former competitor. "Hey, Kit-Kat!"

"Whoo, Kit-Kat!" Glisa whooped as well. After an elbowing from Lacey, Siena added, half-heartedly:

"Yippee…Kit-Kat…?"

Kit-Kat blushed, and smiled, as she stood on the dock. The newcomer had platinum blonde hair with blue highlights, tied up into a bun. Her skin was tan and her eyes were green, and as she smiled, the others noticed she was missing one of her front teeth. She wore a light blue, short-sleeved shirt, and dark denim shorts.

"Hi everybody," she said to them all, "I brought monster cookies!" She reached behind her back and brought in front, a surprisingly large platter of humongous cookies.

"Where did those come from?" Seth questioned, but no answer came.

"Ooh, I want one!" Damion exclaimed, hopping up and down. Kit-Kat nodded, still amiable, as she strode over to the fellow competitors.

_(Confession Cam: Down in the dumps, literally and figuratively)_

_ Zarya—_"Too many happy people…" _(Sighs.)_

The next hero was introduced as Demi. She seemed to be the signature Goth—her hair was black and wavy, and she wore a black shirt with an anime character on it, and black jeans as well. On her wrist was a spiky bracelet.

"That thing looks lethal," Arlen noted, glancing at the Goth's bracelet.

"Self-protection," Demi joked, lightly, as she shyly stepped in with the others. "Gotta watch out for those Sasquatchanakwans…"

"I've gotta commend you for pronouncing that correctly," Riley S. laughed.

"And…we've got our second Riley on the dock! Riley F.!" Chris announced spontaneously.

Riley F. was an orange-headed fellow with gray eyes and a crooked grin. He wore a black, short-sleeved shirt, and khaki shorts. A lime-green pair of goggles kept the hair out of his eyes.

"Should I be alarmed," he questioned, "that the other male 'villains' on my team seem to have trouble keeping their clothes on?"

"You know your other teammates?" Glisa questioned, confused.

"Well," Riley F. replied, as he moved towards the other competitors. "I can guess. Mullet-boy doesn't seem like much of an antagonistic threat." He appraised Seth. "Nor…any other type of threat, I suppose."

"Uncalled for," Seth said half-heartedly.

"Definitely," Demi agreed.

"More of an endearing perk, I'd say," Riley F. responded, his grin unfazed.

"Oh goodie, we've got a narcissist on our team," Lacey drawled, her arms crossed. Riley F. tilted his head.

"You're a villain, right? So we've got a…" he moved his hands around, in no particular direction, as he struggled to label Lacey.

"Nonconformist," Lacey supplied him.

Riley snapped his fingers together. "There's the word. Well…the _censored_ version, I suppose."

"You wanna tussle, hotshot?" hollered Lacey, brandishing her fists, just about ready to tackle him. Riley put his hands up, defensively, and settled in with the others.

"Alright," Logan muttered to himself. "He's definitely not making it in…" he looked over to Arlen. "Could I trust _him_…?"

"Oy!" Glisa quipped as she popped in very, very close to Logan, who yelped at the proximity. "Isn't it _caliente_ in that _chaqueta_?"

"No speak-o…el…Spanish-o!" Logan shouted in response, while Sienna let out an uncontrollable fit of laugher. Not long after, the next contestant arrived.

"Here's our next hero…Rosetta!"

This teen was of medium height and build. Her skin and her messy hair were black, and her eyes were small and tawny. She wore a black, sleeveless jean jacket, a white undershirt, and blue jeans.

The new girl messed with her collar for a moment, before moving towards her fellow competitors.

"No one told me she would be here…" Riley F. murmured to himself, but neither she nor the others seemed to hear him.

"It was either this, or contribute to society, right?" She asked them all, jokingly, before her eyes widened when she saw a familiar face.

"Riley," she said, surprised.

"Rosetta," responded Riley F., pleasantly. "Nice to see a familiar face. I must say, I'm surprised you outgrew the 'leather jacket, ripped jeans, bite-me-attitude' phase."

"And I'm surprised that in two years…you haven't grown at all."

"Okay," Riley amended, "maybe the 'bite-me' part is still there."

"Huh," Kit-Kat mused quietly, as she looked at the two. "A hero and a villain romance. That's got to add a little tension, I suppose."

"Not to mention," Demi agreed, beside her, "all these other hero-villain _clashes_ that appear from every season." Kit-Kat looked surprised at Demi's insight, and Demi turned red, and turned away. "Sorry," she apologized. "I didn't mean to intrude on your monolog."

"Ah, it's no problem!" laughed Kit-Kat. "I'm just surprised anyone was listening. Hey, want a brownie?" She pulled out another tray, this one loaded with steaming, chocolate treats. Seth, meanwhile, started looking around for if Kit-Kat was hiding an Easy-Bake oven somewhere.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the next villain: Lola!"

Riley S. put on her 'you're-dead-to-me' face. Seth put on a somewhat less frightening 'GRR' face. After all, both campers had an unparalleled hatred for the girl.

"Nice to see a legit villain," Chris cackled, as Lola stepped down from her boat. "All the other ones are pansies."

Lola was another tan camper, with long blonde hair and brown eyes. She wore a lilac blouse and a light blue miniskirt. From the arrogant hand on her hip, to Riley S. and Seth's angry faces, to the dramatic music Chris started to play in the background, everyone knew this girl was business. Or just annoying.

"I must agree with you there, Chris," she remarked, with a nonchalant stare at the others. "This show would be _dead_ without me."

"You can't put her on here!" Riley S. protested, the complaint bursting out like a bullet from a gun. "Nobody can stand her!"

"Isn't that the whole point of the 'villain' thing?" Arlen questioned, smirking.

"She's my diabolical arch nemesis!" Seth added to Riley's objections. "She's diabolical! _Diabolical_!"

What happened next was a chain of events: in an attempt to shut them up, Sienna slapped Riley S. and Seth on the head. In response, Rosetta smacked Sienna on the head; she was then smacked by Lacey, who got a smack from Logan, who got slapped in the head by Demi. Glisa, somehow, ended up slapping herself.

"Now really," Lola mocked, grinning, "all this attention is too much, I swear, I'm blushing."

Seth and Riley S. seethed in silence, and the campers turned their head to acknowledge the newcomers.

They came as a pair, but they didn't exactly have that 'Katie-and-Sadie' vibe.

The first one, Isaac, had black hair down to his shoulders, with part of his hair obscuring an eye. One purple streak highlighted the hair that covered his eye. He had blue eyes ('eye', in full honesty), and he wore a black hoodie (hood up), black jeans, and a white undershirt.

His companion, Jack, had a black buzz cut, green eyes, black jeans, spiked wristbands, and leather gloves. He looked…sneaky, for lack of a better word. Not in a 'shifty eyes, twiddle-his-mustache' sort of way, but the vibe was still there.

"Well," Demi mumbled, chuckling to herself. "At least the spiked-bracelet really isn't out of style…"

"More leather though?" Rosetta questioned, her arms crossed. "It's ninety-plus degrees out here…good luck getting those off in an hour." Logan turned pale and glanced at his leather jacket, a worried expression on his face.

"Trust me, sweetheart," Isaac scoffed, as he and Jack traipsed over to the others. "We don't really give a crap what you think about our clothes."

"Hey," Rosetta rebutted, sounding snarky, "I could care less if you wear leather or spandex, Skippy. I was just making an observation. So shut your trap and don't call me sweetheart."

"She _is_ on our team, _verdad_?" Glisa questioned Kit-Kat, who shrugged in response.

"Sorry about that. My friend didn't mean to sound so…" Jack quirked an eyebrow at Isaac, as he pondered his vocabulary choice, "_strident_."

"Like hell I didn't--"

"Anyways," Jack cut off Isaac, and he grinned a bit. "You might've guessed…we're on the villains' team. Can't wait to compete with you all…" he added, with a mildly disturbing grin.

_(Confession Cam: Is a bit "mildly disturbed", itself)_

_ Logan—_"Hm…those two might work, for my alliance…"

_Jack—_"People tend to say I 'steal' a lot…really, I just borrow things. _(Holds up a tray of Kit-Kat's cookies.) _Well, she'll be getting the tray back, at least… (_He grins_.)

"Are we done yet?" Chris complained to the cameraman, who shook his camera to the left and right, signifying a 'no'. Chris muttered some PG-13 language under his breath, but gave a pleasant grin as the next hero dropped in.

She had long, straight brown hair, with a left fringe that went over an eye. She wore a black top with a white outline of a dinosaur, black jeans, and a hoodie tied around her waist.

Very solemnly, she walked over to Chris, and then proceeded to put a hand on his shoulder. She turned towards the camera with a serious expression.

"Kids," she announced, "this is what happens when you don't go to college." Then she cackled and dashed off, leaving a very annoyed Chris standing in her wake.

"That," Chris announced, half-heartedly, "was Jessica."

"What's up?" Jess questioned the other campers, a cheerful grin plastered on her face.

"Oh, the usual," Zarya lamented.

"Queen bees, fighting, and people losing their pants," Damion filled in.

Jess's grin grew larger. "Count me in!"

"Oh brother," Lola snorted, flipping her hair in contempt.

"You mean like your twin brother who you were needlessly cruel to?!" Seth accused, pointing a finger at the queen bee.

"I…don't think dat's what she meant," Glisa piped up.

The next camper arrived on the scene. He was tan, and had brown eyes, but the most prominent feature was his black-and-red Mohawk. He wore a KISS t-shirt, jeans, and he kept a guitar strapped onto his back.

His name was revealed to be Mozart (he preferred to be called Mo), and he wasted no time with his thoughts.

"If you kick me off because I'm bisexual, I will smack you in the head. With my guitar. While it's on fire."

"Is that even possible?" Riley S. wondered.

"_I'd_ like to see it," Sienna snickered.

"I didn't even say anything!" Chris protested. Mo just scowled at Chris once again, before skulking his way to the campers. Damion gave Mo a curious look, but once Mo looked his way, he looked down, his face plagued by a red blush.

Jessica, too, turned surprised and red at the sight of Mo. She looked away, unsure what to say. Mo, not sure who talk to, pulled out his guitar and started to play.

_(Confession Cam: Deteriorating into a soap-opera)_

_ Jessica—"_I like to think that Mo and I had…well, something on our last competition…but we lost contact after the season was over. I'll be frank—I have no clue where we stand, now."

_Damion—_"This…is a possibility." _(Smiles slightly.)_

_ Mozart—_"Yeah, I don't know if I'm all that happy I'm doing another season…but it could work out. Something's good got to come out of it, right? (_He pauses_.) Or…not."

_Jack—"_Hmph…I play better than that loser."

_Isaac_—"I'm a better guitar player than him…_and_ I bet he can't sing in English, German, _and_ Russian. What a tool." _(He crosses his arms and grumbles to himself.)_

Aaron was the next one to be deposited on the dock. He had a bit of a jock mien. He wore a white sweatband over his spiky red hair, and his eyes were blue.

"Yes, I'm the new hero: here to save the day!" He proclaimed, with a swaggering grin, as he quickly rushed over to the campers. He gave Kit-Kat a flirty look. "You look like you could use some saving, sweetie…"

Kit-Kat turned red, and backed up a step. "Tempting, really…"

Aaron, unfazed, glanced at the other girls around. "This is quite the gathering! We've got our female fatales and the brave heroines…"

"And some dudes, too," Riley remarked wryly.

"True, true!" Aaron crooned. "Ah, this is gonna be a fun season…" Zarya, standing next to him, rolled her eyes and quickly slunk away.

"Y'know, I still don't know his last name…" Jess mused to herself.

The next villain was a tall and pale, with a long blonde braid and icy blue eyes. She wore a purple tank top and black denim shorts. As soon as she hit the dock, she tossed her luggage to Zarya.

"You," she announced, "can carry my stuff. And you…" she glared at Riley and Rosetta, two campers she competed against in her last season. "You two better stay out of my way, this time around." She strutted over to the competitors without another word.

Riley and Rosetta exchanged looks. Zarya contemplated throwing Laura's things into the lake.

"Three queen bees is three too many," Damion announced, to no one in particular.

"It spices things up," Lola suggested smoothly, not abashed by the label in the least. Sienna chewed on the inside of her cheek, but said nothing.

_(Confession Cam: Labels are for jars)_

_ Sienna—"_I'm not that bad…okay, well I'm sort of bad…the whole 'villain' thing proves that…but still. Yeah, okay, this is not the most convincing argument. How do you turn this thing off, again?"

"Next, we have Chelsea!" proclaimed Chris. "Who will hopefully refrain from burning down the dock…"

True to Chris's words, Chelsea was the signature pyromaniac. She wore a hoodie that had the words 'play with fire' on the back, a graphic tee underneath, and skinny jeans, and white DC's that were drawn over. Chelsea herself had brown, choppy hair, with red-and-yellow dyed bangs. Her eyes were dark brown, she had wrist flame tattoos, and her eyebrow was pierced.

"Don't worry," Chelsea told Chris, as she gave him a tomboyish grin, "I'm not planning on burning anything…yet…"

"Oh boy," Jess growled, "maybe you can refrain from setting the cabin on fire this time."

Chelsea's cocky look turned sour. "Well, if it isn't my favorite camper." (From the tone of her voice, it was _pretty darn clear_ that this was sarcasm.) "I thought I told you I didn't do that, Skidmore."

"B.S.," Jess spat.

"Go fish!" Aaron exclaimed, and then frowned. "Oh wait, wrong card game…"

"Let's just save the cat-fights for later, alright?" Demi suggested.

"A _fabuloso_ idea," Glisa agreed with the Goth, nodding rapidly. Chelsea scoffed, shrugged, and walked over to the others—making sure to keep a wide berth between her and Jessica.

A fellow by the name of Long arrived next. He had black skin, and a small ponytail that was unseen, due to a do-rag he wore around his head. His eyes were black—pretty much all pupil. He wore a black hoodie that read 'nothing is normal' on the front, and wore faded jeans with those. The most surprising aspect of him was a fox that sat on his shoulder.

"Pets are allowed?" Kit-Kat asked, curiously.

"Well, why not…" Chris replied, with a shrug. "We're not very good with enforcing anything, anyways."

Long silently walked over to the others. He stood near Lacey, but she sneezed, vehemently, once the fox (Kitsune was his name) was near her. Lacey shot Long a glare, and Long shifted his position with no complaint.

"Another quiet type, eh?" Kit-Kat mused to Demi.

"Looks like it," she agreed. "I think I remember this guy from another season…I wasn't with him, I mean, but I've heard of him. He's got kind of a sad history."

"Poor guy," Kit-Kat murmured. "I do hope he can open up soon, I hate to see someone become too closed off…"

Speaking of the closed-off type, Zane, a villain, stepped down next. He wore a rudimentary black-sweatshirt and jeans combo, and had a book tucked underneath his arm. His eyes flashed gray as he bleakly looked over his surroundings, and he quickly walked past Chris, towards the opposite end of the dock.

He stopped once he locked gazes with a past competitor.

"Zarya," he acknowledged the girl in front of him.

"Zane," Zarya replied, without much inflection.

"That's 'I love you' in loner," Riley F. translated for the rest of the lot. Zane rolled his eyes—they seemed to darken for a moment—before he quietly faded in with the rest of the competitors.

_(Confession Cam: Where the quiet ain't so quiet)_

_ Zane—_"I don't understand why I was placed in the villain position. Zarya is the slightly angrier one. Not to mention, it appears Long is as quiet as I am. Honestly, I am a perfectly pleasant person."

_Zarya—_"Don't believe anything Zane tells you in here, any time. Ever."

_Long—_"I...am having trouble finding people I can tolerate."

The final hero was also the final camper to arrive—Bren. He had long dark hair, with glasses. He wore a hoodie, and cargos.

"Nice to see you, bra," Chris greeted the last arrival, with a high-five. "Especially since now we're finally done with these stupid intros."

"Glad to be of service," Bren replied, with a smile. "It's very good to be back, Chris. This season's gonna be fun, I can tell the competition's gonna be tou--"

Bren, unfortunately, never got to finish his statement, thanks to this:

"_You_!" Lacey shouted, before sprinting down the dock and lunging at the teen to tackle him.

The show paused then, Lacey in mid-air, and Bren with a terrified expression on his face. The camera switched away to Chris, who was standing in an unidentified room filled with TV screens.

"So, what's the deal with Lacey and Bren?" Chris questioned the audience. "Trust us, we wish we knew, too…but also:

"What's to come of the conflict with Riley S., Seth, and Lola?

"Or about the clash between Jess and Chelsea?

"Who's gonna win Mo's affections—Damion or Jess?

"What's going on with Riley and Rosetta?

"Will Long, Zane, and Zarya ever say more than a sentence at a time, in public?

"Will Arlen ever find a belt? Will Logan ever find a shirt? Will Jack be able to take off his gloves?

"All this and more on the next TDI: Heroes Versus Villains! Until next time, this is Chris McLean saying…_good luck remembering all twenty-four!"_

_(A.N.) _**(1)** _"Pants on the ground! Pants on the ground! Looking like a FOO with yo' pants on the GROUND!" _

_ …_

(I am so sorry you guys have to tolerate me.)

Anyways! I hope I portrayed your characters adequately. Many thanks to all those who left their info or a review, it was a surprisingly large amount.

For those who need a quick cheat sheet:

**Heroes**—Riley S., Seth, Kit-Kat, Glisa, Aaron, Rosetta, Long, Mo, Damion, Jess, Bren, and Demi.

**Villains**—Sienna, Lola, Laura, Riley F., Chelsea, Lacey, Arlen, Logan, Jack, Isaac, Zane, and Zarya.

More shenanigans to come…later.

Thanks for reading!

OH! If you can, feel free to tweak the "campers I'd hate, campers I'd love" thing. Since you'd know them better…or something.


	3. Night Games

**(A.N.)**Yeah…what's at the bottom is more important than what's up here. I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. Err…enjoy the chapter, everyone.

This chapter is brought to you bythe phrase: "mildly sadistic".

(By the way, this is downright silly—but I've decided that I dislike italics. Out with italicizing, in with bolding!)

* * *

The twenty-four campers gathered in the mess hall, dividing themselves by the labels that split them in half. Chris walked up to a podium that was placed in-between the two tables, and cleared his throat to draw attention to himself.

"Alright, it's good we don't have to waste time splitting you up into teams…" he began. "Most of you have already established your status, here." He grinned at a disgruntled Lacey, who was clutching an icepack to her head.

**(Confession Cam: Hit 'em high, hit 'em low)**

**Lacey**_—(Speaking in a mocking tone.) _"Well, golly! Let's go and try to tackle the strongest guy on here! _(Her normal tone resumes.) _I freaking _hate_ that guy, but I can't let that get in the way of what I'm here for."

**Bren**_—_"Well, I didn't attack her. I just side-stepped out of the way. Still, serves her right—that was ridiculous and idiotic, voting me off _fourth_ last season…"

**Long**_—_"The only thing I've established is that I have no idea what I'm doing here…"

* * *

"So!" Chris continued. "Unpack your things, get to know your fellow competitors, give a hug to Chef, and the challenge will start at a quarter to eight. Dinner will be served in two hours."

"What Chef calls dinner will be served in two hours," Zane corrected, muttering under his breath.

"By the way, hope Lady Luck is on your side, because there's gonna be something right before the challenge that could help you…"

"What do you mean by that?" Kit-Kat questioned. "An advantage?"

"Yup!" affirmed Chris. "But I can't reveal too much—it'd spoil it for the viewers, and I make most of this up as I go along. Anyways, girls cabins are to the left, and boys cabins are to the right! The cabins are labeled, so unless you're an idiot—_Aaron_—"

"Hey!" Aaron objected.

"You should be able to find your cabins A-OK!" Chris finished for the rest of them, still in an amiable mood. "Now go on and get!"

Nobody got up.

"Okay, you can stay," Chris corrected himself, "but we're rolling in a TV pretty soon. My mom just sent me vacation pictures from when she went to visit Nebraska. Should be a fun watch—"

Sure enough, after that was said, not a soul was left in the room. Chris was still in there, but like we said, not a soul was left in the room.

Shielding her eyes from the glare of the sun, Jess jumped down the stairs of the mess hall, and started wandering around the grassy campgrounds. Her luggage, along with everyone else's, was still sitting in a pile near the dock, so there wasn't much pressure for her to lug her stuff over to the cabin, yet.

"Mo! Hey, what's up?" She questioned a familiar face. Mo was sitting, his back propped up against a tree. His guitar rested in his lap—it appeared that he was tuning it. "I haven't seen you in…well, quite a while, eh?"

"I guess not," Mo agreed, smiling. He gestured for Jess to sit down next to him, and Jess complied. "How's it been going?"

"Pretty damn swell," Jess agreed, flashing him a grin. "And yourself?"

"Eh…as well as it can, I suppose." Mo frowned suddenly, inspecting his guitar. "Hm, I need…"

"Firecrackers? Whoopee cushions? Spray paint?" Jess suggested, pulling all the aforementioned items out from behind her back.

"No, a pick," Mo corrected, and then gave Jess a strange look. "Where were you hiding those…?"

"Tools of the trade," replied Jess, with an ominous wink. She turned around, showing Mo her back, and sure enough—all of the items were gone.

"Good God," Mo remarked, impressed, and frightened: "You're like that cookie girl, but you're gonna be pulling explosives out of nowhere."

Jess rolled her eyes, jokingly. "Great, you just ruined my biggest gimmick."

"Well, sorry for spoiling your potential felony."

"Apology accepted."

* * *

Damion and Aaron were both spying on Jess and Damion from two sides of the same tree. Both were unaware of the other's presence. When they did notice, they yelped, covered their mouths to keep themselves quiet, and then gave each other dubious looks.

"You too?" Aaron questioned.

"Yeah…" Damion replied, uncertainly, "but I'm for Mo. You?"

"Jess," Aaron replied, and then raised an eyebrow, and chuckled, rubbing his palms together. "This gives me a wonderful idea…"

"You realize," Damion quipped, "we're being huge creepers, right?"

"Surely you realize the importance of this!" Aaron exclaimed, shaking Damion by the shoulders. "This is more than Dante and Beatrice, more than Cleopatra and Caesar, even more than Cyrano and Roxanne…_this_ is…_true love_!"

"Does she even know who you are?" asked Damion.

Aaron slapped his forehead. "Yes, she knows who I am! Does _he_ know who _you_ are?"

"Well, no…" Damion admitted. "Not yet." He pumped his fist in the air. "But he will!"

"Gotta love these love rectangles…" Aaron mused.

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Bi-sexual, Tri-sexual, I'll-poke-you-in-the-eye-sexual) **_**(1)**_

**Aaron**—"Okay, I'm in love with Jess, who's in love with Mo, who's bisexual, and is being pined after by Damion, who's homosexual. For those of you keeping score at home…confusion scores another point."

**Damion—**"Well, I love a good challenge, and this is probably the most overly-complicated situation I've been in. It's not as bad as those anime shows, though. I mean really, love septagons? What the heck?"

* * *

"Yo, Heckle and Jeckle…"

Logan put his arms around Isaac and Jack, and gave the two a cocky grin.

"What's up?" He questioned the two of them, but before he could launch into a speech of any sort, Isaac cut him off—

"You want an alliance," the loner deadpanned.

"Well, yeah," Logan looked surprised. Then, a little annoyed. "I had a whole intro prepared."

"Well, we're a little more to-the-point," Jack chuckled, pushing Logan's arm away. The sneaky one wheeled in front of Logan, and leered at him. "Give us three good reasons. You've got half a minute of our time."

"Gee," Logan commented dryly. "Got somewhere important to go?"

"That Nebraska slideshow is sounding more appealing by the second," Jack commented, and added, "twenty-six seconds."

"Fine," Logan grumbled, in defeat. "Okay—we're three, strong villains—the type of people that these guys won't want to cross. We can take these guys—_all_ of these guys down."

"That was two reasons," Isaac pointed out. Logan scowled.

"I can count."

"Obviously," Jack disagreed, still grinning, "you can't."

"Are you two always cocky bastards?"

"Nah," Jack rebutted, with a mild shrug, "sometimes we like to go more Snidely Whiplash on people. Twiddle our mustaches, tie innocent girls to the railroad track…y'know, just to spice it up."

"Fine," Logan said suddenly, as he started to get irked, "forget it. I'll find some other people." He began to walk away, but Jack and Isaac exchanged looks, and Jack called out:

"When can we start?"

Logan smirked.

* * *

"So this is what he meant by 'labeled cabins'…" Laura observed, half-heartedly, as she stared upon the two girls' cabins. The one on the left had a huge sign above the doorway that read: "EVIL LAIR". The one on the right donned a sign that read: "SUPER SECRET HERO HEADQUARTERS". The heroes' cabin had a cape that was tied around their chimney.

"_That's_ gonna catch on fire," Chelsea remarked, craning her head as she stared at the chimney that was playing dress-up.

"You would know, freak," Lola snidely stated, as she strode past the others, and walked into the cabin. Laura smirked and strutted past Chelsea, walking pace-for-pace with Lola.

"Yeah," Chelsea muttered, although Lola couldn't hear her, "I _would_ know that, considering it's common sense. Something you don't have. For cripes sake, that's right up there with stop, drop and roll…" still grumbling to herself, she follow Lola's suit and went into the cabin as well.

Sienna and Lacey exchanged glances.

"Personally," Lacey remarked, sarcastically, "I'm a little disappointed Chris didn't swing for some special effects. No storm clouds, gathered around our 'evil lair'?"

"Not even dramatic music," Sienna lamented.

"I don't know about you, but I'm gonna build a moat for us villains."

"Do I have to find an alligator for said moat?"

"Or at least an irritated raccoon," compromised Lacey.

"If all else fails, we can just throw Chelsea in there," Sienna volunteered.

"Being a pyro, I'm sure she'll appreciate that."

The two girls finally went into their cabin.

* * *

"Z…Zarya!"

Zane stumbled as he ran down the hill that sloped downwards, into the beach. Zarya sat on a dock nearby, her feet dangling into the water. Zane nervously walked over to her, his eyes a pale green color, as he sat down besides Zarya, a fellow competitor from his last season.

"Don't you have teammates to converse with?" Zarya questioned, staring down at the water.

"I could ask you the same thing," Zane retorted.

"The girls are intolerable."

"I'm not off much better. Take that intolerability, and add some testosterone in the mix."

The two sat in silence.

"Do you want to be here? In this competition, I mean?" Zane asked her.

"It's better than back home," Zarya responded, in a quieter tone.

"I'm really sorry about all that goes on back there. It's really not fair."

"Yes, well, I didn't ask for your pity, did I?" Zarya snapped. She stood up abruptly, and stomped away. The sudden movement made the dock shake, and Zane toppled off like a bowling pin.

His head poked out from the water's surface.

"That went swimmingly," Zane sighed, as he watched Zarya walk away. He soon put his hands on his forehead, as he complained: "Well that's just _great_; I just used a freaking _pun_. That's the lowest form of humor, besides--"

The waves pushed Zane so that his head thumped against the dock.

"Slapstick…"

* * *

Rosetta kept her hands in her pockets as she wandered around the forest, no location really in mind. Silence was her goal, but that goal was soon kicked in the head.

"_Trust fall_!"

Riley F. fell from a nearby branch (albeit, a low one) with his arms crossed over his torso and a mildly sadistic grin on his face. A surprised Rosetta just barely managed to catch Riley, and she was soon holding him bridal style.

"That was fun," Riley said cheerfully.

"I'm dropping you now."

And so she did.

Riley landed in a non-painful matter, but still gave Rosetta a puppy-dog look, as if he had. He scampered up quickly, and gave Rosetta a smile that was, surprisingly, devoid of any evil undertones.

"It is, in full honesty, it's quite good to see you, Rose," Riley informed her. "Two years…too long. A hell of a long time. Hey, did you notice?"

"Notice what?"

"It's still here." Riley pointed upwards, towards the branches, where a rusted bird cage hung—a token of the season the two had been in. Rosetta gave an appreciative 'wow' of surprise. Riley smirked and leaned towards Rosetta.

"I'm guessing there's not a giant rock to almost squish you to death, _again_, but we can skip that part and move right onto the kiss…" Rosetta blushed furiously, and took a reluctant step backwards.

"Look, Riley," she said, cautiously, "we're on different teams this time around. I'm not sure we want to go around exploiting this…um…whatever's going on, here. I still…" she rubbed her arm, with uncharacteristic shyness, "want to…restart where we left off…but I'm worried if people knew about it, it could harm our chances in the competition."

"Fair enough," Riley allowed. "Secret relationships are always more fun. But, I have to warn you…" Riley's grin grew even larger. "If I can't be going out with you in public, I'm gonna have to be _very_ flirtatious. Can you handle that?"

Rosetta draped her arms around his neck. "I'll try to be strong."

* * *

"Oh dear," Kit-Kat remarked, as she peered out the window of the heroes' cabin. "This might be bad." The other current occupants of the room, Glisa and Demi, lined up to stare out the window as well.

Outside, Arlen was slinking towards the girl villains' cabin, with a mischievous look on his face.

"Man alive…" Demi stated dully, shaking her head in dissatisfaction, "what is he up to? What was his name again…Arlen, right?" The girls exchanged looks, and then, gingerly, went outside. However, they stayed on their porch.

"Arlen, are you _lost_?" Demi questioned, cupping her hands around her mouth to accentuate the volume.

Arlen looked up in surprise, and gave the hero girls a pleasant grin and a wave.

"Nah, I know where I'm going!" He assured them. "Just thought I'd drop and give the girls over there a visit…although, if you'd like, I'd certainly have no problem swinging by your place afterwards!"

"Oh dear God no," Kit-Kat whimpered.

"Uh, we're good!" Demi replied to the teen. She raised an eyebrow. "Got your eye on one of the villains?"

"Oh trust me, it's not just one-sided," Arlen cackled, doing a little victory dance all the while, "_my_ chickadee's been checking me out like a grocery item!"

"_Que es esto_?" Glisa exclaimed, finally fed up. "_Cero_ technique. _Es muy tonto_." The insult was lost in translation, and a confused Arlen looked back and forth from Glisa to Demi.

"What'd she say?" He questioned.

"Something about a tomato!" Demi yelled back.

"I don't think that's right…" said Kit-Kat.

"No, no," Glisa agreed. "_Lo siento_…I said dat dis man should try a little more class when approaching the _chicas_."

"Well, that's true," Kit-Kat agreed. "Wasting your time on pick-up lines will do you no good."

"Well, how about we waste time doing something _else_?" Arlen called out in response, and Kit-Kat yelped, ducked to the ground, and covered her head with her hands.

"Nicely done…" Demi drawled, sarcastically.

"Sorry, Skittles," Arlen cackled in response. "Man, you are _so_ like this one chick from _my_ season…" **(2)** Arlen finally began to continue walking towards the other girls' cabin. "Wish me luck!"

"Good luck," Demi said half-heartedly.

"Good luck, _idiota_," Glisa sighed.

Kit-Kat continued to be curled up in a ball.

Not long after, Arlen walked back the way he came, a red handprint on his cheek and a belt wrapped around his forehead.

* * *

"So…revenge is the name of the game, eh?"

Riley S. questioned this, as she plopped herself down on the nearest bed (the two of them were in the male heroes' cabin) and crossed her arms, giving Seth a scrupulous look.

"Well, we've got to get back at Lola," Seth agreed. "There's no way you can't agree with that."

"And I don't," agreed Riley, "Lola's a fricking _eejit_. The whole idea worries me a bit, though, when she's got those two other queen bees—Sienna and Laura—on her team. And…" Riley scowled a little, narrowing her eyes at Seth. Seth grew worried.

"And…what?" He asked.

"And how do I know you're not gonna do something stupid again? Like leave me fighting Lola alone again, like in last season."

"Oh…" Seth relaxed a bit. "That's what you're mad about? Well, I'm sorry about that, really…"

"Or what about the alliance, and how much of a failure ours was last season?"

"I wouldn't say that," objected Seth, "what I was in charge of went well."

Incredulous, Riley raised an eyebrow. "What _were_ you in charge of?"

"Nothing."

"So, nothing went well…" Riley slapped her forehead. "I'm too tired to even know if that's clever or not…" Bren opened the door, then, and looked surprised when he saw the occupants.

"Oh, sorry," he apologized, "am I interrupting something?"

"Only some very dumb wordplay," Riley replied, and gave Bren a half-smile. "You can come in, y'know." Bren nodded, and progressed forwards, depositing his suitcase on the bed and clambering up on it, himself.

"So, Bren," Seth began to question, "what's the deal with you and…and…" he snapped his fingers together, struggling to remember the contestant's name.

"Lacey?" Bren volunteered.

"Yeah, Lacey! That was it."

Bren grimaced, and shook his head. "Long story, my friend. I was on her team, they voted me off fourth last season—no good reason, too."

"Well, that would explain why you're ticked off at her," Riley mused, as she leaned forward, curiously: "But why is she so mad at you?"

"I returned to the show," Bren admitted, "And I was, admittedly, not the best-mannered person. Lacey didn't like my new attitude." His back stiffened. "But it was called for, really."

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Lingering in gray area, but sometimes in pink)**

** Seth—**"Huh, well, I didn't expect that, I must admit. Bren has a bit of a villainous side to him? I suppose I do too. _(Frowns.) _Really, I'm serious. What—you don't think I have the capacity to kick someone's ass?"

**Riley S.—**"Did he just seriously use the phrase 'capacity to kick someone's ass'?"

* * *

"So, where are the other hero dudes?" Riley S. asked Bren and Seth.

"Mo, Damion, and Aaron are walking around…" Bren responded.

"Long's in here, I think," Seth finished. "In the closet, reading poetry." The three teens turned their heads, and stared at the closet. Not a sound came out of there.

"Is he…alive?" Riley asked.

"Long!" Bren exclaimed. "Knock once if you're still breathing!" A small tap came from inside the closet's wooden doors. Bren, Riley, and Seth all let out a collective sigh of relief.

* * *

5:00 sharp, the twenty-four teens arrived in the mess hall. They divided up once again, twelve heroes and twelve villains, and conversed with each other until Chef burst outside the kitchen door, wheeling a dinner cart out.

"Dinner is served!" He barked, as he tossed Tupperware containers at the campers the way one might throw a hand grenade. The contestants ducked out of the way of the incoming projectiles, some trying to catch them—but most failing.

Kit-Kat, with a container in her hand, curiously poked open the lid—and screamed, pushing it away as soon as she could.

"That bad, huh?" Demi questioned, sympathetically.

"_It winked at me_!" Kit-Kat exclaimed.

"Hm…no _comprendo_ the _problema_," Glisa mused, chomping pleasantly on her own dinner. Curious, Long looked over at what she was eating—but soon gagged and scooted down a few steps.

"Need a scone?" Kit-Kat questioned the quiet-one, holding up a platter of said pastries, while Seth slammed his forehead on the table, grumbling to himself about running gags.

"Or an explosive?" Jess offered in rebuttal, chuckling. Her expression grew stoic. "In full seriousness—do you? Just offer me a price."

"Please don't become scarier than you already are…" Mo pleaded, kneading the side of his head, with a sigh.

"Hey!" Chelsea remarked, leaning over to the heroes' table. She gave Kit-Kat a hopeful look. "Got any more of those scones?"

"Sure!" Kit-Kat replied, cheerfully, but Jess took the platter away from Kit-Kat before she had a chance to give it away. Jess shot Chelsea a sneer, and Chelsea scoffed.

"Oh boy, you sure showed me," the pyro snorted, before rolling her eyes and leaning forwards again, back to her place at the villains table. "Does kinda suck, though…what do I do know?"

"Starve?" Isaac suggested, staring at his plate with disdain.

"Unfortunately some people probably don't want to get even _scrawnier_," Laura slighted, with a nasty look directed towards Riley F.

"And we're off," Zarya announced, spinning her finger around in a circle.

True enough, Riley F. gave Laura a vicious little grin.

"Nice to know you're capable over holding grudges, even when I haven't seen you in two years. Really, coercing underclassmen to do your homework didn't occupy your time enough?"

"Nice little façade, Foxy-pants," Laura said smoothly, with a dark little smile, "but I know you're secret."

From the heroes' table, Rosetta stopped messing with her food and looked up, but just as quickly looked down.

Without losing a breath Riley retaliated, with full seriousness: "Okay, I admit it…I'm a Gleek."

As to not break the fourth wall, Jack then held up a sign for the confused viewers/readers, and it read: "_Definition of Gleek: 'Glee' Geek." _

Exasperated, Sienna questioned Lacey, "Is there anyone on this show that has an _ounce_ of maturity…?" The two turned their heads towards the next little snippet of a scene:

"Hey," Arlen whispered to Chelsea, elbowing her. "Wanna know who looks awesome without a shirt on? I'll give you three guesses." Chelsea, without looking away from her food, dropped her hand on Arlen's head and flung him backwards, off of his seat.

"The correct answer was Aaron!" Shouted (who else?) Aaron, from across the room.

Lacey grinned at Sienna, in response to her previous question. "Maybe a _pint_…"

Zane just shook his head at his teammates and sighed. "Is it time for the challenge yet…?" With as good of timing as a sitcom, Chris strode into the mess hall.

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Past the point of saving)**

** Zane—**"This is how bad the show is: I'm actually _relieved_ to see _Chris_."

* * *

"Campers! Drop your utensils!" ordered Chris, without delay.

"No fight there," Logan countered.

"We didn't even _get_ utensils…" Lola agreed.

"Whatever!" Chris shouted indignantly. "Anyways, the pre-challenge is gonna be…over there! So go over there!" Chris pointed in some general direction, and the campers gave him confused looks.

"So…" Riley S. questioned, tilting her head to look where Chris was pointing. "Uh, over _where_…?"

"Somewhere between a rock and a hard place," Bren suggested.

"More like," Rosetta added, "somewhere between 'what-the-heck's-going-on' and 'oh screw it'."

Chris scowled, and elaborated: "Okay, fine, I need you to go over by the docks, where you arrived earlier today. First one there gets the advantage, so _go, go, go!_"

A stampede ensued, then, and Chris yelped, dive-bombing underneath the nearest table in order to protect himself. The first one near the exit was the speedy Aaron, who only proceeded to then to run into the wall and fall to the ground.

"Use a door much, moron?" Lola questioned meanly, before dashing out said door herself.

"That works all the time in cartoons!" Aaron wailed back, clutching his head in pain.

"_Vamos_!" Glisa shouted at Aaron, swinging him up and carrying him fireman style, out the door. The other teens hightailed it out of the mess hall, clearing the place in five seconds, at the most.

Outside, Logan and Seth were leading the pack.

"Nice try, hotshot," Logan snickered, as he began to gain the lead, as the dock became closer and closer in view.

"Seth!" Riley S. shouted over the noise of the other teenagers. "Pretend he's Lola!" Seth did as she ordered, but all that he managed to do was get a very frightening mental image of Logan in a miniskirt and a blonde wig.

"AH!" Seth warbled. "The pain!" He stumbled, and in a frantic maneuver, threw his arms out forward. He managed to grab the collar of Logan's leather jacket, and he took the bad boy down with him as he fell to the ground.

This allowed Glisa (and a very confused Aaron in tow) to gain the lead and be first to the docks. The heroes cheered, and Logan shook his fist and Seth laughed nervously and politely ran away.

"_Heroes get the advantage_!" Chris shouted via intercom. "_Keep heading down the beach, until you reach the end! We'll be waiting for you…in a…not-creepy way…"

* * *

_

"So here's how this will go down!" Chris began, as the twenty-four campers listened, with varying amounts of patience. "We're gonna start this competition with a _true_ camping game. Capture the flag! Well, not quite. We're playing with glow sticks."

"Glow sticks?" Damion repeated, surprised. "But it's still light out. What's the point of--" Darkness dropped on them like a falling elephant, and Damion scratched his head, adding: "Okay, _that_ was convenient…"

"What's the advantage that we get?" Demi questioned Chris, and Chris replied:

"Well, unless you're an imbecile—_Aaron_—"

"Stop doing that!" Aaron complained.

"Then you know the rules of capture-the-flag," Chris finished his sentence. "In this case…capture-the-glow-stick. The two teams get divided areas, and there's a small, no-man's section in the middle. The two teams get a glow-stick and hide it, and the other team tries to nab it. So, the advantage for the heroes is that their home-base can only be reached by going up a small hill. More running for the villains, less running for the heroes."

The heroes grinned at each other; the villains either sighed or shook their heads.

"Take some time to look at your terrain, for a sec…" ordered Chris, and the campers did as they were told. They were at the far end of the island, past the sandy beach. They were all standing in a flat, grassy field—it was revealed to be the villains' home base. Farther ahead, a fairly steep hill stretched upwards—it then turned flat, and farther past that was a barrier of trees.

"Did anybody even know this spot existed?" Lacey wondered aloud.

"Nope," responded Isaac.

"Nuh-uh," Jack agreed.

"No," added Chris. The contestants gave him speculative looks, and Chris shrugged in response. "Big deal, I haven't explored this island much…I'm not a very outdoorsy guy!"

"Your career choice doesn't make much sense," Zarya noted.

"Nothing here ever does…" Rosetta sighed.

"Moving on!" Chris continued his instructions. "See the orange flags over there," he pointed towards a nondescript place in the field, "and over there?" He pointed near the top of the hill. In both places, there was a tall orange flag jutting up from the ground, still easily seeable in the dark. The campers nodded lazily.

"There's a circle drawn around these flags. It's fairly big—it'll serve as the prison for tagged players. Players can rescue captured teammates by running in opponent territory and tagging the caught players. You'll hide the glow-stick somewhere, and when someone grabs the other team's glow-stick and brings it back to their own side, then that team will win! Any questions?"

"Yeah," Bren spoke up, warily, "is there something you're not telling us?"

"Well," Chris said pleasantly, appraising the entire twenty-four teens, "if there are no questions, then we'd better start this thing!"

Lacey smirked at this; Bren rolled his eyes.

"Oh, one more thing!" Chris continued. "The no-man's land is indicated by a taped-off area. Once you cross that area…you're free game! Divide up, and good luck, campers! Villains, you're gonna need it…"

* * *

"Okay," Sienna started taking charge, as soon as the villains huddled together. "We should divide up equally—six of us defend the glow stick, and six of us try to take the other team down."

"Sounds good to me," Jack agreed. "Who's going to what side?"

"It doesn't matter, that much," Chelsea remarked. "Either way, you're gonna be running."

"Well…that's true," Laura admitted, reluctantly.

"Okay then," Lacey decided. She mimed cutting their circle in half, with her hand, "this half will be defense. This half will be offense. Sound good?" Lethargic shrugs were the only response, but that was no matter.

"I'll hide the glow stick," Riley F. offered, and Zane handed him the plastic stick without complaint.

"I'll go with him," Lola offered instantaneously. Riley gave Lola a weird look, but shrugged, and the two walked off.

The six villains playing offense (Isaac, Jack, Arlen, Chelsea, Zane, and Zarya) gathered to discuss their plans.

"Alright then," Isaac drawled. "I've got a good offense tactic. But we need a distracter. Who wants to run around like a decapitated chicken, while flailing their arms and screaming like a maniac?"

"_Boom shakalaka_!" Arlen whooped, throwing up his hand. Chelsea rubbed her temples with her hands.

"You'll do," Isaac agreed.

* * *

"So, _Foxy-pants_," Lola questioned, smirking at the orange-headed teen as the two walked down the field, "got any idea where to hide this thing?"

"Yes," Riley replied. "And I'm ignoring that nickname…anyways; I have an idea that could easily help us win. It involves being depraved, soulless cheaters, though."

"My favorite thing," Lola laughed, grinning widely. "Let's do it."

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Does not own foxy-pants, nor pants of any kind)**

** Riley F.—**"It's an interesting switch to hang out with someone who, like me, has little, if any, morals. _(Holds up his hands, defensively.) _Don't get me wrong, my _romantic_ interest is solely in Rosetta…it's just gonna be fun having…well…all these _villains_ on my team." _(He grins.)_

**Lola—**"Alright, so I'm still switching around people, trying to determine who'd be best for an alliance. I need to determine who I can trust. I'm considering Sienna, but then I'd get Lacey tied in on there, and she's got that Bren guy hating her. I've already got Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum at my throat, I don't need someone _capable_ actually added into the mix…"

* * *

"You OK up there, Glisa?" Demi asked, as the party animal shimmied up a tree, carrying the glow-stick in her teeth. The heroes were hiding their stick in a tree (obviously) towards the left of the top of their hill.

"Excelente!" Glisa replied, although the answer came out garbled. "Although, all dese splinters are starting to hurt!" Finally reaching a high branch, she dropped the glow-stick from her mouth to her hand, and cracked it. After a moment or two, it began to glow, bright purple.

"Did someone say they had something to tie the glow stick with?" Damion asked the gathered teens.

"I've got silly string," Jess offered.

"On you?" Damion asked, surprised.

"In all the colors of the rainbow," Jess replied, smirking.

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Has control over…captions. But not much else)**

** Damion—**"She has control over hammerspace. I can't compete with that!"

* * *

"That'll do," Mo said, cautiously. "OK, the glow-stick has to be visible…let's keep the obscuring to a minimum, then. This is already pretty hard to reach."

"Fair enough," Rosetta agreed. "Glisa, Jess is gonna toss the silly string up to you. Think you can catch it?"

"Absolutely!" Glisa gave the group the thumbs up. Rosetta nodded towards Jess, and Jess wound up, and tossed the silly string high up to where Glisa was perched.

Glisa let out a yelp.

"Ay!" She wailed. "Right in the ojo!"

"Ojo?" Kit-Kat repeated, uncertain of the word's meaning.

"Eye," Long told her quietly, as he thumbed through a Spanish-English dictionary.

"Are you alright?" Seth asked Glisa, and Glisa gave a warbled 'yes' in reply. Glisa, on her hands on knees, moved over to the far end of the branch. She sprayed some of the silly string on the branch, and stuck the glow-stick onto it, securing it.

"Alright!" Glisa cheered. "We're good to go! Somebody catch me!"

"Wait, Glisa—" Riley S. cautioned, but Glisa had already jumped out of the branch, and fell to the ground with an unceremonious "thump".

"Still OK?" Demi asked Glisa, with an awkward little smile.

"_Más o menos_…" Glisa groaned in response.

Kit-Kat glanced at Long, hopefully, and the quiet one translated: "'More or less', she says…which is still a bit too optimistic, I'd say…"

"_Campers_!" Chris shouted from the no-man's land, holding a megaphone over his mouth. "_Are you ready for the game to start_?"

Collectively, there was a yes in response.

"Alright, then let's play some capture-the-glow-stick!"

"That's really not a very catchy name…" Aaron observed.

"Alright people, split up," Bren ordered. "Don't go too far away from the tree, but don't go too close, either—we don't want to draw attention onto it." Some campers wandered off then, in clusters, to try there own tactics or just to stay out of the action.

Bren himself began, uncertainly, walking towards the no-man's land, but he was soon sidetracked.

"Hey," Riley S. greeted, poking Bren on the shoulder. "On a scale of 'yes' to 'hell yes', how would you like to take down both Lacey and Lola?" Bren gave her an incredulous, but somewhat interested look.

Seth, who was standing next to Riley, frowned deeply.

"This isn't a good idea…" Seth complained.

"What did you have in mind?" Bren asked Riley, and the gamer cleared her throat before continuing.

"Well…you, me, and Seth, working together…"

"Alliances never work…" Seth continued to ramble.

"You mean: voting together, that basic deal?" questioned Bren, and Riley nodded her head in response.

"But how could that beat Lola and Lacey?" Bren continued to pry.

"Well," Riley began. "If we made it to the team's dissipation, then the three of us could run the whole thing. We just need to make sure we don't to something stupid and get one of us voted off. Meanwhile, we could work together to screw up whatever moves Lola and Lacey try to pull."

"This is a dumb idea…" Seth warned.

"This is gonna work," Bren agreed, grinning at Riley. Seth, exasperated, threw his hands up in the air and complained:

"I might as well be talking about Justin Bieber's hair…"

"It _is _pretty sexy hair," Riley agreed, finally acknowledging Seth. Seth slapped his forehead, and Riley laughed, putting her arm around Seth. "I'm just messing with you."

"Do I have any say in this?" Seth asked.

Not to his surprise, Riley replied with a cheerful: "Nope!"

"Hey!" Rosetta shouted from the top of the hill. "Are you gonna start doing something, or do I need to borrow some dodge-balls from Jess?"

"That was your season's running gag, at least find a new weapon!" Riley S. exclaimed in response, and Rosetta couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Still!" Rosetta continued. "Get your arses in gear!"

Bren gave the two a salute, and grinning, he ran into the villains' territory. Riley and Seth exchanged glances, shrugged, and followed suit.

* * *

"Alright…" Aaron whispered to himself, as he slunk near the edge of the villains' territory. "You're a tiger, you're a shadow, and you're the sneakiest sneak to ever sneak around these parts…"

"You're also tagged, buddy," Lacey announced, calmly poking Arlen in the middle of the forehead. "Let's go—time for prison."

"Oh woe is me!" Aaron gasped, fisting his eyes. "In the hands of the enemy…who knows what sorts of horrors I'll have to face…half-naked interrogations, perhaps?"

"On second thought," Lacey corrected herself, as she grabbed Aaron by the collar. She soon shoved him into the hands of the nearby Logan. "Here. You take him."

"I thought I'd get to tackle people!" Logan complained. "I don't want to escort him!"

"Oh yeah?" Aaron challenged. "Well, you were also supposed to be a half-naked villainess! Which one of us do you think lost out more?"

"I'll leave you two to figure it out…" Lacey chuckled before running back into the center of the game.

Aaron cleared his throat. "Y'know, I could escort myself, to save you the trouble…"

"Yeah right," Logan grumbled. "Try to run and you'll regret it."

"Oh, I'm already regretting a lot of things, trust me…"

* * *

"Hey!" Demi greeted Kit-Kat as she ran up to the side of the cook. "Any signs of trouble?" The two were keeping guard on the heroes' side.

"Nothing yet," Kit-Kat responded. "But this conversation is bound to jinx ourselves…" True enough, Arlen was soon running up the hill, screaming like a maniac, with no apparent direction in mind. The heroes on defense exchanged glances, before running after him.

Not long after, the five offensive (in both meanings of the word) villains were running up, in a more direct goal—taking the heroes by storm.

"Gals!" Damion exclaimed. "And Mo too, sorry…we've got a problem! Stop chasing Arlen for a sec!"

"Ah shoot," Rosetta muttered, as she glanced back and forth from the insane-looking Arlen to the five oncoming villains. "Who do we go after?"

"Alright, here's what we're gonna do," Mo decided, thinking on his feet. "Rosetta and Demi, you two go after Arlen." The two girls nodded and dashed off. "Now then, Glisa, I'm really sorry about this…" Mo, without warning, gave Glisa a light shove, and the girl was soon toppling off the hill.

Glisa rolled down the hill like a snowball, gaining momentum, and cheering all the while. She crashed into Isaac and Jack—and, frightened, Chelsea, Zane, and Zarya soon retreated. Seeing the failure of his teammates, Arlen avoided the capture of Rosetta and Demi and made it to the no-man's land.

"I hate that hill!" Jack shouted to no one in particular.

"I hate this show," Isaac added, annoyed.

"I love dis show!" Glisa cackled.

* * *

"Gah!" Jess gasped as she stumbled into no-man's land. Hands on her knees, she panted, gasping for breath. Bren soon jumped into the area with her, just barely avoiding the tag of an angry looking Sienna, who paced along the edge of the barrier for a moment, before finally walking away.

"Everywhere…" Bren managed to gasp out. "I looked everywhere. I don't have a clue where it is."

"Same here," Jess agreed, finally managing to stand up straight. "How's our team doing?"

"Riley, Aaron, and Seth were captured," Bren admitted, reluctantly. He peered up towards the hill. "From the looks of it, we still have Jack and Isaac captured, though."

"ThreetwooneGO!" Zane shouted frantically, as he sprinted past the two, Zarya not far behind.

"We probably should've gone after them…" Jess remarked.

"Probably…" Bren agreed. Neither one moved.

From the top of the hill, Mo and Damion managed to land a hand on the two of them—unfortunately pushing them off the hill in the process.

"Nice work," Mo complemented Damion with a grin, and Damion blushed and mumbled something vaguely resembling a 'thanks'.

From the bottom of the hill, Zane stumbled to his feet, and turned his head towards Zarya. Zarya had her hair in a tangled mess, with her hair plastered over her eyes due to the fall.

"Wow," Zane remarked, with the slightest hint of sarcasm, "I'm not sure if that's an emo look or a sheepdog look."

"It's both," Zarya deadpanned in response. "It's the emo sheepdog."

"Ah. I see." Zane's mouth twitched into a smile. He held out a hand for Zarya to take. "Shall we?"

With a small smile of her own, Zarya took it. "We shall."

Rosetta approached Mo, a hopeful expression on her face: "Hey, think I can abandon defense duties and give offense a shot? I'm a fairly good runner; I might be able to help."

"Sure, knock yourself out," Mo replied, with a shrug, "It's not really up to me, I guess…" Rosetta didn't waste a second dashing away, past the no-man's land and into villain territory.

She managed to get pretty far, only to have a run in with (CONVENIENTLY ENOUGH) Riley F.

She slowed down to a stop.

"How's it goin', Mr. Fox?"

"Well enough, Ms. Hawthorne," Riley responded, with a pretend tip-of-the-hat. "I suppose this is the time to break formality and tackle you to the ground, or something like that, right?"

"Or, you can be a gentleman and tell me where your glow-stick's hidden…" Rosetta replied, with a crooked grin.

Riley sighed and shook his head. "Sorry to say, I think I just can't do that…"

"Reasonable enough," Rosetta agreed. "Too bad you can't catch me."

Rosetta gave Riley a taunting look, before starting a sprint—and Riley watched her, amusedly. Rosetta ran around Riley and continued forwards, only to trip in the near distance and fall to the ground.

"I may or may not have set up a few booby traps!" Riley F. told her, cupping his hands around his mouth. "But it's kinda leaning towards may have!"

But Rosetta wasn't focused on that—she was focused on something she saw a good ways ahead of her, sitting plainly in the middle of the ground.

"Unbelievable," she hissed, gritting her teeth.

* * *

"Well, sounds like the heroes' glow-stick is up in a tree, of all places," Sienna told Lacey, as the two patrolled the nearby area. "I don't know how they expect us to bring it down."

"I've got it covered," Chelsea told the two, as she strode past them, dragging Arlen in tow.

"Hey, I like playing rough as much as the next guy, but I'm not sure where this is going…" Arlen remarked, giving a look that was a strange mixture of interest and fear. The two moved towards the no-man's zone, until Chelsea finally hoisted Arlen up and held him out in front of her.

She let out a battle cry, and then pushed forwards, using Arlen as a human shield.

This actually worked for quite a while—an irritated Arlen was left taking all the hits. Chris, from the sidelines, had to hold himself he was laughing so hard.

"This so not cool!" Arlen shouted, and Chelsea shouted in reply:

"Shut up and be a squirrel!"

"A squirrel?" Arlen repeated. "Why a squirrel?" Chelsea pointed up towards the tree, and Arlen groaned.

"Wait, you can't do that!" Demi shouted, running towards the two. "We've already tagged Arlen! He can't still be used!"

"Fine!" Chelsea retorted, shoving Arlen towards the Goth. "Take him!" She turned around and started climbing the tree, herself.

"Hot potato with the pervert, then," Demi muttered, before hading Arlen off to Mo. "Here goes nothing…" she ran towards the tree and hopped onto the branch, throwing forward a wild grab. She managed to snag Chelsea by the ankle—and the pyro cursed.

"Y'know," Chelsea remarked, as Demi helped her down. "Silly string is supposed to be flammable…"

"Well, it's not gonna be any good to you if it's on fire!" Demi reminded her, and with a sigh, directed her to the prison.

However, Lacey was up there, and Lacey soon grabbed the hand of Jack.

"We're safe," Lacey warned Demi, and then she dashed off, a relieved Jack following her. The two made it crossed to the villains' side, just as Jess crossed back over to the heroes' side, again. Thankfully, she had just saved Riley S.

An exhausted Jess soon collapsed, Mo just barely catching her in time. Damion, nearby, watched with a mixture of jealousy and sadness.

"What's wrong with Jess?" Mo asked Riley S.

"Well," the gamer replied, brushing herself off. "She's going through a series of events that happen when you've just finished a long-distance run. First, you've got the exhilaration…"

"I'm gonna blow up a rhinoceros!" Jess shouted.

"Then you've got the stiffness…" Riley continued to narrate.

"I can't feel my legs…" Jess whimpered.

"Then comes the exhaustion..." Riley continued.

"This grass looks…comfy…for sleeping on…" yawned Jess.

"Then," Riley added, grinning a little, "then comes the phase that I can only describe as the OM NOM NOM phase."

"The…OM NOM NOM phase? Like, referring to…eating…?" Mo asked, confused, giving Riley S. a doubting look. Riley nodded, fully serious.

"Have I ever told you how edible your hair looks?" Jess questioned Mo, and Mo took a step sideways, leaving Jess to topple to the ground.

"She might need a break," Riley S. observed, and a still-frightened Mo nodded in agreement.

"Hey, what's that noise?" Kit-Kat asked the group, and the teens grew silent in order to listen.

"People from the villains' side are shouting something," Mo noted.

"But what are they saying?" Riley questioned. "Egg beater?"

"No, I don't think that's it…is it Derek Jeter?" Demi mused, stepping into the conversation as well.

"No," Kit-Kat disagreed, and surprised, her eyes widened. "They're shouting…cheater!" The two teens ran down to the no-man's land, and peered into the distance, hoping to discern whatever the problem might've been.

"Wait, those are our teammates shouting it," Mo noted, surprised.

"What's going on? Who cheated?" a confused Damion asked, as he stepped down towards the rest of his teammates.

"Okay, that's it," Riley decided. "I'm gonna rescue someone and see what happened…"

"I got it," Bren (another arriver to the scene) offered, in Riley's place. "With no offense intended."

"None taken," Riley assured him. "Knock yourself out." Bren rocked on his heels for a moment, and then pushed forwards, sprinting towards the villains' prison. The heroes waited, patiently, and soon Bren was heading back, with Aaron in tow.

"It's a tragedy!" Aaron exclaimed as soon as the heroes were in earshot. "We've been duped! Played for! Tricked, I tell you!"

"Stop rambling and just tell us what's going on!" Demi begged.

"They never cracked their glow-stick! It hasn't been lit!" Aaron announced. "That's why we haven't been able to see it. Rosetta just saw it, since she took a face-plant to the ground."

"Well, do you know where the general location of it is?" Kit-Kat asked the Casanova, but Aaron just gave her a guilty smile and a shrug.

"Well…" With despair, Riley looked at her teammates. "What do we do now?"

* * *

"Ugh!" Rosetta shouted, fisting her eyes. "This makes me so mad!"

"Well, Chris isn't gonna do anything about it…" Seth sighed in response. "He never mentioned anything about cracking the glow-stick."

"Even if he did, he wouldn't punish them," Rosetta added, sourly. "Could this get any worse?"

"How's it going, losers?" Lola asked the two, smirking as she walked up to them.

"Never ask that on this show," Seth told Rosetta, thumping his head on the prison's flag. "No puppy guarding, Lola—get out of here."

"I'm not sure she can be daunted by anyone that uses the phrase 'puppy guarding'," Riley F. commented in passing. He winked at Rosetta—and Rosetta just glared at him, not having to work hard to play up her annoyance.

"Hey, here comes someone," Seth observed, shielding his eyes. Glisa was running around, narrowly avoiding capture, as numerous villains tried to tag her. Aaron wasn't far behind—he was very speedy.

"Where is da glow-stick?" Glisa shouted at them as she ran close by their prison. Rosetta pointed towards the general direction where she had fallen earlier, and Glisa and Aaron ran over there. They searched around for a good while, but they were soon captured by Sienna and Lacey.

"Any sign of it?" Rosetta asked the two.

"Nada," Glisa sighed.

* * *

"Alright, they've got eight heroes left," Lacey mused, hands on her hips, as she appraised the heroes' home base, up on the hill. "Which one of them have been the best runners?"

"Bren is the one you should worry about," Sienna admitted to Lacey.

"Ah, that's right," Lacey agreed, and she frowned. "Think I can outrun him?"

"In truth?" Sienna questioned, dubiously.

"Nah, I like to keep myself in high esteem. Anyways, here goes nothing. You coming with me?"

"No thank you," Sienna replied, her hands up. "Have fun getting caught."

"As always, thanks for the kind words."

As Lacey ran off, Lola walked up to Sienna, giving her a smooth, sideways glance.

"Have a response, yet?" Lola questioned.

Sienna exhaled nosily. "No, not yet. Go bother mullet kid, I'm not in the mood for this."

"I'd be happy to," Lola chuckled in reply, walking back towards the villain prison.

"Incoming," Damion noted as Lacey began running up the hill. "Anyone a volunteer for being pushed down the hill? Again?"

"How about we just chase after her?" Kit-Kat suggested.

"Well, no that's no fun at all," Damion complained, but he grinned at the pastry chef. "Alright, alright, let's do this." The two ran down to nab Lacey, but she was able to avoid their maneuvers and continue up the hill.

She avoided going for the flag and instead, went to the prison. Once there, she tagged Isaac.

"Go without me," Lacey instructed him.

"Is that legal?" Isaac questioned.

"Do I care?"

"On that note, neither do I," Isaac agreed, and he began sprinting around the hero territory, as the confused heroes debated whether or not to go after him or Lacey.

Lacey sprinted towards the tree with the flag in it then, and began climbing up. Mo began climbing up as well; Lacey began throwing acorns at him.

"Sorry!" Lacey apologized, as she began shimmying towards the branch with the glow-stick on it. "I'm the Benjamin Button of maturity!" She grabbed the glow-stick and shook it free—meanwhile, Isaac ran towards the bottom of the tree. "Catch!" Lacey ordered, throwing the glow-stick down.

Isaac did catch it, and soon relayed it to Logan, who had ran up there as well.

"Wait, when did you get here?" Isaac exclaimed, to which Logan replied:

"Plot devices, dude! Gotta love 'em!" Logan sprinted down, avoiding the numerous heroes in his path, and made it to the villains' side. Villains', from all over, cheered for their victory.

"Damn it!" Demi groaned. "This sucks!"

"I wouldn't be so sure!" Chris cackled, by megaphone. "Have you noticed how someone's been missing for an exceptionally long time?"

"Well, we haven't heard much from Laura," Riley F. mused.

"No, not her," Chris responded, "she just didn't do anything exciting."

"Nice to know I'm loved," Laura drawled.

"Long!" Kit-Kat realized. "I haven't seen him the whole game!"

"Well that's just great," snapped Mo, arms crossed, "he pulled a Houdini and we were one player short."

"Actually…" Chris continued, finally walking up to the contestants. "If you would, please follow me into the forest…"

One really unremarkable walk into the forest later, the teens saw Long sitting in front of a tree, reading a small, black, leather-bound book. Kitsune, his fox, sat curled in his lap.

"So, Long…" Chris began, grinning widely, "Wanna show these guys what you've got?" Not looking up from his book, Long reached into his pocket and held up a glow-stick. True enough to Aaron's words, Riley F. and Lola had "accidentally" left it unlit.

"Wait, how did he…" Jack began, open-mouthed. "We didn't see him the whole game!"

"Yeah," Rosetta agreed, surprised, "and I saw the glow-stick at one point, I remember…"

"Very true!" Chris mused. "Not long after you were captured, Rosetta, Long dashed out and managed to nab the stick up!"

"Well, the game should've been over by then!" Logan shouted at Chris, but Chris held his hands up, defensively:

"Hey, I didn't know it myself, man, for a pretty long time…in any case, heroes win, and villains lose. Villains, you need to cast your votes in the confessional cam, and be ready to say goodbye to one of your teammates, tonight!"

* * *

**(Confessional Cam: With a tap on the side of the nose…)**

** Glisa—**"Long is a ninja! Case closed!"

**Jack—**"Wow. That dude's such a loner nobody even notices him anymore!"

**Kit-Kat**—"That was amazing! I can't believe Long managed to be undetected like that!"

**Lola—**"An unexpected loss—just due to the fact that my teammates are idiots. Only problem is, who do I vote off now?"

* * *

Logan, Jack, and Isaac gathered behind the cabins, kneeling down in a triangle of sorts, in order to determine their next victim.

"So, who's it gonna be?" Isaac asked their little ensemble. "That Laura chick didn't seem to do much during this challenge, we might want to get rid of her."

"Personally, I think it should be Zane," Logan remarked. "That infatuation with his little loner girlfriend might get in the way."

"Oh please," Jack scoffed. "Like everyone doesn't have some pining getting in their way."

"Oh, really?" Logan challenged. "Like who?"

"It's clear Riley likes that Rosetta chick. Then we've got Zane and Zarya, and Chelsea and Arlen…"

"Well, aren't you quite the shipper," Isaac remarked to his pal, but Jack just rolled his eyes.

"It's not shipping, it's common sense. Arlen has told Chelsea about his shirtless self more than times than this show has resorted to slapstick."

"That's a lie!" Logan complained, as he reached over to hit Jack in the head.

* * *

"This isn't good," Zane whispered, as he and Zarya walked, briskly, towards their respective cabins. "The villains are already banding up. We might be the odd ones out."

"How do you know?" Zarya asked in quiet reply.

"It's mostly just a hypothesis. But it's an easy tell when I can see people hanging in clusters—people who don't seem to like each other that much. I'd say Isaac, Jack, and Logan are in an alliance—and Lola and Sienna are in the start of creating one."

"Just Lola and Sienna?" Zarya questioned. "That can't be too harmful."

Zane shook his head. "There may be more. We can't be too presumptuous…"

* * *

"Hey, Lacey," Sienna started to speak, as she approached her nonconformist friend. "I need to talk to you…"

* * *

**(A.N.) **

(1) It's an obscure reference, admittedly.

(2) Ktd123, you beat me to the punch.

Anyways, here's some **IMPORTANT** news. It concerns **voting**! Kitsune (not the fox) wants a voting system where the **reviewers send in the votes**, so here are my **rules**, if you don't mind me being a tad strident. Especially with the **bolding**.

Number one: PM them.

Number two: Vote from your character's perspective. You are smart—your character is probably not so smart.

Number three: For those characters in an alliance, here's how that deal will go—I will tell you who the other authors are voting for, and you can change your vote to correlate with theirs. It's a little more work, but what the heck. If you don't want to make your vote correspond with theirs, then your character can just be rebellious—more kudos for them.

Happy voting, you villains, and I thank you for reading!


	4. The First Loser

**(A.N.)**I kept you waiting for such a short chapter! Many apologies, everyone. I'm a horrible person, aaaarghlfritzenshmart.

The current voting system might be done for. Stay tuned—but you don't have to worry about it yet, a challenge chapter will follow this.

This chapter is brought to you by: a lack of heroes, and _(what is this madness)_ semicolons!

* * *

_ "Hey, Lacey," Sienna started to speak, as she approached her nonconformist friend. "I need to talk to you…"_

**(Confession Cam: Flashbacks dedicated to the memory of 'Lost')**

** Lacey—**"So here's the deal. I ended up having to refuse Sienna's offer. I'm not so keen on being bought out, alright? I don't wanna get strung along by some chick who thinks she's a hotshot; in an alliance, someone always ends up getting screwed."

**Arlen—**"Heh. 'Screwed'."

**Sienna—**"Great, now I'm having second thoughts. Lola doesn't seem all that trustworthy, maybe the alliance tactic could be held off. _(Scowls.)_ Is there _supposed_ to be this much thinking in the _first_-_freaking_-_elimination_? This is a nightmare."

* * *

Zane gave Zarya a look of hope; the two found themselves alone, again, as they scoured the length of the beach.

"Will you vote with me then?" Zane asked the Russian loner. "I'm hoping to make, at least, a _bit_ of an impact." Zarya exhaled heavily, scowling a bit.

"I'm not even sure if I like the idea of an alliance."

"Then don't think of it as an alliance then. Think of it as a…erm…"

"Think of it as what?" Zarya questioned, monotonously.

"As something that's not an alliance," suggested Zane, his eyes flashing yellow with a spark of humor.

Zarya gave him a dark look. "I'm starting to dislike you again."

* * *

Kit-Kat slammed the door behind her, falling into a sitting position as she slid down.

"It's madness out there," she gasped, as the other hero girls gave her curious looks.

"Mad enough for me to shout out about Sparta?" Demi questioned, as she held out a hand for Kit-Kat to grab. Kit-Kat did so, and Demi hoisted her up.

"What's going on?" Riley wondered, peering out the girl's cabin's window. "It's pretty loud out there."

"They're fighting!" Kit-Kat groaned, fisting her eyes. "It's terrible!"

"Fighting?" Glisa questioned. Excited, she jumped off her bed, running towards the window. "Oh! Let me join! _Pronto_!"

"Who is it that's fighting, anyways?" Rosetta asked the girls.

"Looks like it's the three stooges," Riley S. sighed in response, as soon as she recognized the villain guys outside. "Isaac, Jack, and Logan."

"Should we do anything about it?" Jess questioned the girls. "I mean, if anyone has like, one of those spray-bottles with them, that would separate them. A hose would be even better. Heck, I'd be fine with just throwing stuff at them."

"We should probably just stay out of it," Rosetta suggested, ignoring Glisa whining at this all the while. "It'll blow over soon. If not, then I like Jess's ideas."

"What do you think they're fighting about, in the first place?" inquired Kit-Kat.

"It probably has to do with the elimination," Demi remarked, and the girls nodded in agreement.

* * *

"YOU ATE…THE LAST…PUDDING POP!" Jack shouted, as he tackled Logan to the ground for the umpteenth time.

* * *

"How's it goin', firecracker?" Arlen questioned, grinning as he drew in towards Chelsea.

"Peachy," Chelsea deadpanned, veering away from Arlen. "Get out of my sight for a bit, will you? I need to think."

"Oh yeah, I've been trying to do that too…but I kept getting a headache, so I had to stop." Chelsea gave Arlen no response, and Arlen added as a hint, "That was a _joke_…"

"If it was funny, I would laugh."

"You want to laugh," Arlen accused, with a crooked little smirk, "you just don't want to admit that I am hilarious."

"Well then," Chelsea replied dryly, "I like slapstick. If you get injured, _then_ I'll laugh."

"Ouch! Okay, that was cold." Arlen shivered to accentuate his point. Rubbing his arms, he added, "I know what we could do to warm me up…"

"You're an idiot," Chelsea said bluntly.

"I'm an idiot for love!"

"That was worse than the innuendos!" complained Chelsea, finally exasperated, as she shoved her way past Arlen.

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Does anybody read these? Bolded things are important!)**

** Chelsea—**"_Jeez_, I _so_ can't deal with this right now. I've got more important things to think about than Mr. My-I-Left-My-Belt-In-the-Wash."

* * *

The campers, scattered around the island, fell silent when the ominous message blared from the speakerphones:

"_It's voting time, ladies and gents! Get yer butts in gear and hightail it over to the Confession Cam, ASAP!"_

"I have to admit," Isaac remarked, tilting his head, "it's hard to sound dramatic with a faux Southern accent."

"I think he was a step away from adding 'giddy up'," Lacey added, nonchalantly.

* * *

"Villains!" Chris appraised the twelve teens sitting on campfire stumps in front of him. "Y'all-"

"_Enough_ with the Southern accent," Zane groaned, covering his ears.

"Fine," Chris conceded. "…mate." With an evil little grin, he ignored Zane's angry mutterings. "You guys did pretty well, I'll admit. But not well enough."

"Duh," Lola scoffed. "That's why were _here_."

Chris eyes narrowed. "You guys are snippy today."

"We're villains," Logan pointed out, with a shrug. "Not much you can do about it."

"Don't challenge him," Laura quipped, mildly.

"Can we just get on with the marshmallow-tossing, and the dramatic pauses, and yada yada yada?" Sienna yawned. "I'm getting tired."

"We'll start when I say we start!" Chris proclaimed.

Seconds passed by; contestants glanced at their imaginary watches.

"Alright, let's go," Chris announced. "When I call your name, you'll receive your marshmallow. The one who doesn't receive a marshmallow will go to the Dock of Shame, board the Boat of Losers, and head to the Playa de Losers…and never return…never…ever…with a capital NEVER!" Chris paused again, and raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Wait, none of you are gonna call me out on the 'never' part?"

"Too predictable," Isaac dismissed the idea.

"We can think of much better ways to make fun of you," Jack agreed.

"Fine. Let's begin. First safe villain is…Jack. Isaac. Arlen. Zarya. Chelsea. Lacey. Zane." Zane gave a brief smile to Zarya; Zarya looked away but was smiling a bit, too. "Riley and Lola. Logan."

Sienna and Laura, hands on their knees, gave each other determined glances.

"Ladies…the final marshmallow is in my hands…it's soft and white and is probably, like, 94% sugar…"

"We don't care about the bloody marshmallow!" The two girls shouted in surprising sync.

"No respect. That's what I get. Last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Sienna." Chris scowled. "Can you say, 'anticlimactic'?"

"Sure can, but no way can I spell it," Arlen piped up. He elbowed Chelsea. "_See_! That was _funny_!"

"Not even close," Chelsea grumbled in response.

"Ugh!" Laura snapped. "You know what? Fine. Screw you guys. I'm so over this show, anyways."

"Judging from your tone, I'd guess not," Riley F. commented, unable to hide his grin.

"Oh yeah, laugh it up, Foxy-pants," Laura sneered at the orange-headed teen. "I'm sure you've got a _happy_ future with this show."

"Again," Riley F. sighed, shaking his head, "that sarcasm of yours is not—very—_subtle_."

Laura just glared at him once again, and with a pivot of the heel, she marched down the dock and boarded the boat.

"Aw, come on guys!" Arlen complained to his fellow villains. "She was hot! Why'd you have to vote her off?"

"Had to happen eventually," Jack said breezily in response. "Hotness wasn't exactly relevant."

"Hotness is _always_ relevant!" Arlen wailed in response.

**(Confession Cam: The votes of the many, the wise words of none)**

** Just before the elimination:**

** Zane—"**Looks like little alliances are appearing all over the place. On top of that, I've got to find a way to make sure we make it out on top. _(His eyes turn a thoughtful blue color)_ ...They're forcing my hand. I'm voting for Sienna. Hopefully, they'll just try to destroy each other..."

**Arlen—**"So, here's what's up. Laura sucked today. But she's hot. So, I can't vote for her. Instead, I don't want to have to see another guy's bare chest for the next however many weeks it takes me to win. So, I voting for Mr. 'I don't need to wear a shirt, just my crappy leather jacket.' Dude needs to go."

**Lola—**"So your girlfriend thinks I'm not a threat huh? Well I'll show her just how much of a threat I can be Zane, and get your butt out of here. No I just need to make sure Sienna, Lacey, and Foxy-pants vote with me and I'll be back in a power position. _(She cackles.)_ Oh and Seth, go suck a big old lemon."

**Laura—**"Riley, you know what you did."

**Riley—**"Laura, you make pre-teens gasp 'oh my GAWD she's such a witch-with-a-b'."

**Lacey—**"Voting for Laura seemed like a pretty simple choice. She didn't do much today—if anything. She's got to go."

**Sienna—**"Looks like Lola's alliance is falling apart. I'm gonna have to side with Lacey and choose Laura. This'll still work out in our favor. _(She flips her hair.) _I'm positive."

**Jack—**"Heh, our alliance seems pretty tight. I wouldn't doubt that we'll have a bit of an influence on these next few eliminations…_ (Smirks.) _Laura blows, so Laura goes."

**Isaac—**"Well, here goes nothing. Even if Laura doesn't get kicked off, I see no reason to think either Jack or me could get kicked off. Logan I care less about…but, well, I'm pretty sure he's safe too."

**Logan—**"Yeah, yeah…I wanted to vote for Zarya, but the stupid-freaking majority overruled. Stupid Jack and Isaac…Tweedledum and Tweedledipstick."

**Chelsea—**"Feh. Well, I can't say much—I haven't gotten a very good read on anybody, yet. I'll just settle for voting for Sienna—I'd say she's a potential threat. Better shoot down one of the queen bees while I still can, right?"

**Zarya—**"I'm voting with Zane, but it was because I _wanted_ to vote for Sienna, alright? So take your shipping and shove it out your—"

-_One conveniently placed cut-off later_-

The eleven heroes dispatched themselves to their respective cabins, except for Lola, who lingered behind. She grabbed Riley F's sleeve and stopped him, smiling in a somewhat evil mannerism.

**(Confession Cam: One door closes, another opens to hit you in the face)**

** Lola—**"It seems I've been double-crossed. Zane wasn't in the bottom two. If Sienna and Lacey voted with me, then Zane should have been sitting on that stump along with Laura. The math doesn't add up."

_(From outside the confessional) _**Riley S.—**"Holy crap, you did _math_?"

_(Still in the confessional) _**Lola—**"Shut up!"

* * *

"Foxy-pants," Lola said quickly, "I need help."

"In more ways than one," Riley agreed.

"Yeah, we got it, you're witty," drawled Lola. "Anyways, here's the deal. I need an alliance member, and frankly, no one seems like a better choice."

"Well, I'm flattered," responded Riley, with a level of caution. "But you're gonna need to buy me, here."

"With what, money?" Lola offered, holding out a twenty.

"No, I meant that as a figure of speech…but I would like the twenty."

"Take it. I'm rich."

"Nice to know," Riley mused, pocketing the cash. "Anyways, what I really meant was that I need a reason to believe you're trustworthy."

"I voted for Laura, today," Lola informed him, lying smoothly. "I saw how much you hated her. I managed to convince a few others to vote for her—but those agreements are all temporary, no one wants to stick around to be an actual alliance member. You, though? You I can trust."

Riley leered at Lola, as if trying to detect any signs of dishonesty. Seeing none to speak of, he shrugged, and nodded.

"Alright. Seems fair enough. One condition?"

"Shoot," Lola replied.

"Can I call all the boys 'Debbie'? I don't want to have to learn their names."

Lola shook Riley's hand. "Deal."

* * *

Aaron burst through the heroes' room, soon slamming the door behind him. He ran over to Damion's bed and began poking him in the shoulder, incessantly.

"What's going on?" Damion yawned, as he rolled over to stare at Aaron with discontent. "I need that shoulder for…something…that I will think of later. Dang it, I am tired…"

"But dude!" Aaron exclaimed. "I have the plan! The plan that will win us the hearts of our beloved!"

"Oh!" Damion drew upwards, instantly interested. "Let's see it." Aaron whipped out a small notebook and flipped to a page he had written on. He handed it to Damion, who in turn grabbed it, squinted, tilted it, turned it upside-down, and soon handed it back to Aaron in defeat.

"I can't read that," complained he.

"How can you not…?" Aaron complained. He scowled, and began scanning over the written words. "Wait…oh crap…I think that says 'mango'…?"

"You can't read it either," Damion noted, half-heartedly. "Can you remember what it was?"

Aaron knit his eyebrows together, thinking deeply. "It had something…to do…with Jess! I think…right?" He tapped his chin. "Okay, plan delayed. But I'll remember and I'll be back!" Aaron proclaimed, before dashing out the door again.

"At least he used the door this time," Damion remarked to himself, quietly.

"Indeed," Long agreed softly from the bed across Damion. Damion jumped a half-foot, startled at the sound of the voice.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Damion apologized, flustered. "I didn't notice you there!"

Long turned away, slinking further into the dark side of the bed. "No one ever does…"

* * *

**(Confession Cam: "Does that make me crazy?" "**_**Yes**_**.")**

** Damion**—_(Spinning his finger around his ear) _"Cuckoo!"

* * *

"How do you propose we go about doing this?" Bren asked quietly, as he, Seth, and Riley S. gathered behind the mess hall for an impromptu, secret meeting.

"Maybe we can try to target Lola in the next challenge," Riley S. suggested.

"Problem is," Seth pointed out, "it does kinda count on what the next challenge is."

"There's gotta be some way," Riley S. mused, cupping her chin in her hand, "that we could trip her up. We've got to show how evil Lola is to the rest of her teammates."

"We could just shout it to them," remarked Seth, grinning. "That's one way to get the message across." With a glance to Bren, he added, "Then, of course, there's Lacey…how strong is the grudge you have against her? Should we be going after them one at a time?"

"Whatever works best," Bren replied, simply. "I'm fine with either, as long as we can get rid of them both."

"I say we wait till the challenge is announced, then we make plans for the best way to take action," Seth suggested, firmly. "We can't really set a solid goal without knowing how the challenge is gonna look. The challenges are gonna always pit us against each other, so we're always gonna have an opportunity to mess them up…we're just gonna have to see what form it'll come in."

"Seth, I think you're right on that account," Riley agreed. Relieved, Seth smiled. "We just have to make sure no one else finds out," she declared.

"Oh crap, do _not_ say that out loud!" Bren whispered harshly, covering his ears as if that would help in any way, shape, or form. "You're gonna jinx us!"

"Oh come off it," Riley retorted, smirking. "You're so superstitious."

"Ah, with good reason, too…" a new voice commented, startling the three alliance members. "What have we here?"

**(Confession Cam: A follow-up beyond compare)**

** Riley S. **"Son-"

**Bren—**"of a-"

**Seth—**"Biscuit!" _(Looks around, awkwardly.) _"Well, I don't like to swear…"

* * *

**(Confession Cam: Laura's epitaph. AKA: The first final words.)**

** Laura—**"Okay, let's state the obvious: being first off bites. But I'm not gonna let it get to me. I have weeks to relax at a resort, and let's be frank: that's better than the hell those other suckers are gonna go through. Yeah, have fun tearing each other apart. Oh, and villains, about that teammate of yours, Mr. Foxy-pants? Yeah, he might be the fun, sarcastic guy now—but wait till something doesn't go away. Then you'll see how much of a jackass he really can be. _Then_ you'll be _sorry_ you voted me off. Later, morons."

* * *

**(A.N.) **Cliffhangers? Foreshadowing? Loud questions? Next chapter should be fun. If not that, then just interesting.

…at the least, people we say…words…and whatnot.

Thanks for tuning in. Later, folks!


	5. Not Quite Ready to RRRRRumble

**(A.N.) **So…school is over, as you _might_ have heard. So updates might be fast, or just plain sporadic, I'm not quite sure what I'll be working on.

Anyways, this chapter is dedicated to: being _underhanded, _(quite a story behind that), left-handed, right-handed, ambidextrous, or no-handed, for all you guys out there typing with your feet.

Enjoy the chapter!

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Chris stood on the Dock of Shame, hands clasped together, as he began his recap.

"Last time, on _Total Drama Island_…

"The twenty-four campers arrived—twelve heroes and twelve villains from previous competitions! Rivalries were re-ignited, romances dabbled in, and alliances constructed. The campers got the ball rolling with a wicked game of capture the flag, which I swear wasn't as lame as it sounds.

"Due to Long and his sneakiness, the heroes managed to snag the win. The villains ended up voting Laura off, due to her lack of action in the games. But more interesting was what happened _after_ the ceremony…Lola and Riley F. started an alliance, and then a mystery camper discovered the alliance between Seth, Riley S., and Bren…

"So: will Lola and the less-liked of the Rileys cause some damage? Who discovered the alliance between the trio of heroes? Is there anywhere we _don't_ spy on the campers? And who will win this next challenge, on the most dramatic campfire ceremony so _far_…on Total! Drama! _Island_!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The sirens woke the campers at a time that was early even for farmers. Groaning and moaning, the campers gradually made their ways out of their beds, into their bathrooms, and soon emerged from their cabins in fairly good shape. Most were trudging by, not really paying attention to anything, but Jess saw something that she considered somewhat peculiar.

"I'm pretty sure that wasn't there yesterday," she said, mildly, pointing out into the distance beyond the docks. Curious, the nearby Kit-Kat followed her line of sight. She dropped her jaw.

"I…would have to agree with you there," she concurred, weakly. "Generally, islands don't appear…overnight." True to Kit-Kat's words, a large island loomed in the distance, with a huge edifice sitting on it that looked like a baseball stadium.

"And I could've sworn stadiums take at least a year to build," added Jess, still in monotone.

"Yeah, that sounds about right…"

"Well then," Jess said, plainly, as she turned around. "Guess we know the location of the next challenge. Off to the mess hall we go."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Do you like waffles?" Aaron sang as he dropped his plate on the heroes' table.

"These are not waffles," deadpanned Demi, regarding the purple fluffy things on her plate with disgust.

"But they're very…colorful," Seth remarked. "Anyone have a clue how my pancakes got bright orange…?"

"Secret ingredient: cheeto dust?" Rosetta suggested. "Yeah…I think I'd like to stick with that theory, even though I have the bad feeling it's wrong." Shaking her head, she sighed, and pushed her plate away from her. "This is turning from Total Drama Island to _The Hunger Games_."

"A fight to the death would be a step up from this," Riley S. responded, with a light chuckle.

"Don't be giving 'im _ideas_," Glisa warned, in a hushed tone, as if Chris could be eavesdropping right there and then. In actuality, it wasn't that far-fetched of a thought. The conversation between the heroes continued lightly, and easily. However, things at the villains table were a tad tenser.

**(Confession Cam: Is a lover, not a fighter…)**

** Sienna—**"I'm pretty positive Lola knows I skipped out on her alliance; I wouldn't be surprised if she's after me, now."

**Lola—**"Oh, I'm not holding a _grudge_, now…all's fair in love and war, isn't it? _(Grins.) Everything_."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So…" Chelsea began, awkwardly. "I hear skinny jeans are all the rage now."

"Whoops," Arlen commented in response, staring down at his hanging-on-for-dear-life pants. "Guess I screwed the pooch." Chelsea snickered, just the slightest, and Arlen pointed a defiant finger at Chelsea.

"Ha! I told you I'd make you laugh!"

"That was…in pity," Chelsea defended herself, instantly scowling again. Arlen smirked in reply, crossing his arms, and knowing he was triumphant.

"_Anyways_," Riley F. picked up the conversation, hoping to veer it elsewhere. "Place your bets, ladies and gents, who's the first hero going home?" The eleven villains craned their necks, peering at their competitors and trying to decide.

"Are we assuming we're winning this challenge…?" Zane questioned, half-heartedly.

"Well, of course," Lacey replied. She gave Zane a mischievous look. "At least, we'd _better_ win…" her voice trailed off, and she gave Zane an insane little grin.

Sienna peered at Lacey, speculatively. "Or else…?"

"Ah," Lacey paused, clearly not prepared for this. "Or else…I will…eat you."

"Intense," Sienna remarked.

"Anyways, I'd say mullet-boy's going home," Lola announced, and then, louder, "ain't that right, Seth?"

"I'm not dignifying that with a response!" Seth shouted in reply.

"Maybe," Zarya mumbled, "betting against them isn't the best thing to be doing while they're still in the same room…"

"Aw, it's all in good fun," cackled Jack.

"Nothing better than demeaning those around you," Logan laughed in response, as he bumped fists with Jack. From the table next to theirs, Kit-Kat swiveled around, looking concerned.

"So, you two aren't fighting anymore, right?" She asked, hopefully, as she cupped her chin.

"Fighting?" Mo repeated, vaguely interested. "I missed a fight?"

"Ah, from what I've heard, they were just tackling each other," Damion informed him, dismissively. "That's hardly entertainment."

"Agreed…" Riley S. mused, and then, with a frown, "why is football so popular again?"

"No answer for that one," admitted Jess. "But I'm beginning to think that we need a better fight to make up for the lame one the guys had."

"Uh-oh," Kit-Kat whimpered, looking at Demi with concern. "I don't like where this is going…"

Demi was looking interested at Jess's proposition, but at Kit-Kat's words she quickly grew morose. "Ah, that's right, a fight would be…um…very, very bad…" She cleared her throat, and started staring at the table again.

**(Confession Cam: They aren't paid to act.)**

** Kit-Kat—**"Well that was completely and utterly unconvincing. _(Raises an eyebrow.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Ay!" Glisa whooped, throwing her arms out. "We're gunna have a _fight_?"

"Now let's just wait a second," Kit-Kat stammered out, nervously, "surely there's something better that we could do."

"Nothing I'm interested in," Isaac drawled, smirking a bit. "Who's gonna be fighting?"

"It's no worry…" Long assured Kit-Kat, softly. "I doubt anyone will actually be willing to fight. Not to mention, nobody really condones violence between teenagers…at the most, it'll be a pillow fight or a who-can-listen-to-smooth-jazz-longer contest." Kit-Kat chuckled at that, and Long smiled in response, shyly.

"Well…who has a score to settle?" Bren wondered aloud. "Ah, besides the obvious…" he and Lacey looked at each other, briefly. Annoyed, they just as soon looked away.

"Well, there's you two," Mo said bluntly, pointing back and forth between Lacey and Bren. "Then there's Riley S. and Seth against Lola. Chelsea and Jess still hate each other. Zane and Zarya are still a little conflicted. Rosetta and Riley F. are on each other's nerves."

"Too many to choose from," Aaron yawned. "Maybe we should just…"

The door flew open then, and Chris stepped through, grinning widely. "Campers! How goes it? What are you guys up to?"

"Arranging fights between the campers with grudges against each other," Zane explained, monotonously.

"Aw come on, guys!" Chris whined. "That's _my_ job!" Campers weren't particularly shocked at this response—knowing Chris, the only surprise with his response would be that he wasn't placing bets himself.

"Nice to know you have our backs, Chris," Lacey remarked, with a sarcastic little thumbs-up.

"In full honesty, though," Chris continued, smiling once again. "You might find yourselves having a true chance at getting back at your rivals in this challenge." Intrigue stirred among the campers, and finally, most, if not all, were listening intently.

Jess, however, raised her hand.

"Yeah, Jess?" Chris questioned, looking confused.

"Does this challenge have anything to do with the giant island and stadium that popped up spontaneously?" She asked, dryly.

"Um…" Chris hesitated. "No…?"

"Really?" Jess asked, her tone still deprecating. "Nothing at all?"

"Nope."

"A stadium and an island just dropped on by, for no particular reason."

"Pretty much!" Chris affirmed.

"All right, then." Jess lowered her hand.

"Moving on." Chris walked in the center between the heroes' and the villains' benches. "Today will bring back that classic one-on-one formula that has been done and done…probably too much, but let's beat this dead horse. Anyways, here's how it goes: I already assigned who's going against whom, but I doubt that's of much surprise to you.

"However, here's the kicker: after a pair competes, the loser gets to decide the challenge that the next two will compete in—there'll be a sheet with some listed challenges to choose from. However, you can NOT consult with the player going up—they can't tell you what challenge they'd be best in, or what they're good at, or whatever. Still, if you lose, you can probably still get your next teammate an advantage! Pretty nice of me, eh?"

"Who decides the first challenge?" questioned Damion.

"That…" Chris replied, and then paused. "Is something I forgot to think about…"

"Chris?" Logan began to ask. "We don't have even teams anymore. What're you gonna do about that?"

Chris opened his mouth to speak again, but frowned. "I should've probably thought this through…" Looking irritated, he waved the campers off. "Alright, you guys go do…whatever the heck you feel like. Apparently, I've got some planning I still need to do."

"Yeah…" Jack drawled in agreement, as he (and several others) began moving off of the benches, out the door. "You do that."

"Oh, Bren and Riley," Seth whispered, very hushed, as he neared towards the two. "I need to, um…" he paused, seeing as Aaron was very close. In fact, he was just in eavesdropping range. "I, ah, got my shoes untied, and I need you guys to help me, so let's go. Right now." Hurriedly, Seth grabbed his alliance members by the shoulders and steered them out the door.

Aaron tilted his head.

"Am I supposed to be that stupid of a fictional character?" He wondered aloud.

"Yes," Isaac answered for him. "Yes you are."

Aaron nodded, considering this. "Huh. That explains a lot of things."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Are you sure this is safe anymore?" Riley S. whispered to her two alliance members, as the three of them trekked towards the docks. "I don't feel so confident, now that _she_ knows…"

"She won't hold it against us," Bren assured her. "I think she knows she's not on our target list."

"But what if she thinks she will get on there?" Riley continued to worry. "I mean, hypothetically, what if we did manage to get Lacey and Lola off? Then _she_ might think we'd get rid of her just to make sure she wouldn't tattle."

"We'll just have to wait and see," Seth suggested. "I don't really want to disband this alliance. At least, not yet."

"What if the heroes all turn against us, though?" Riley groaned, running her hands through her hair. "There are so many ways this could go wrong!"

"We'll be _fine_," insisted Bren, with a sincere smile. "We should try and figure out what we're doing for this challenge."

"Well, we know you're going against Lacey, for sure," Seth commented. "And either I will be going against Lola, or Riley will. I think our strategy would be pretty self-explanatory: just beat them. Sound good?"

"Sounds good," Riley agreed, warily. "If we can beat her…" she sighed, but then smirked, with a glance at Bren. "Something tells me _you_ won't be having much of a problem." Seth knitted his eyebrows together, and very abruptly, walked away—his pace brisk.

"Seth!" Riley called after him. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" Seth called back, halfheartedly. "I'm, ah…I'm heading back."

"Back where?" Riley asked, but Seth was already out of earshot. She frowned, and asked Bren, "What was that all about?"

**(Confession Cam: Turn that frown upside down! Or sideways!)**

** Seth—**_(Takes a deep breath.) _"Jealousy is a bad thing. A bad, thing…a very, very bad thing…"

**Riley S.—**"What's going on with Seth, anyways? He's been acting weird, lately."

**Bren—**"Anyone else notice that we used an _abysmal_ amount of pronouns in that conversation?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Meanwhile, a couple of the campers had started a two-on-two basketball game. Jack and Isaac were playing against Chelsea and (for some reason) Glisa.

"Ha!" Jack grinned, crouching low, as he kept the basketball in a steady dribble. "I should warn you, sweetheart, I play my hardest, all the time. Even if I did go easy on you, I would still be like, impossible to beat."

"Oh, you might've wanted to not say that," Chelsea mused, as she spread her arms out in a defense position. "You could've used the 'I-always-let-girls-win' as an excuse." Jack raised an eyebrow, undaunted.

"Yeah?" He taunted, because that was apparently the most he could come up with. "An excuse for what?"

"This." Chelsea yanked the ball away from Jack a second later, pivoted on her heel, and passed to her teammate Glisa. Glisa stared at the ball for a surprised second, before taking a shot. It went over the hoop and landed on Isaac's head.

"…is dat a foul?" Glisa questioned.

"No," Chelsea replied, as she nervously jogged over to inspect Isaac. "On the other hand, it might be a concussion. You okay?" She held out a hand for Isaac to take, and the woozy villain did so.

"Thanks," he muttered, clutching his head. "Can we call a time-out?"

"Reasonable enough," agreed Chelsea. She picked the ball up from off the ground and spun it around in her hands. "Who do you think we'll have to face, today, in the challenge? I've got a fairly good idea who _I'm_ gonna have to fight." She rolled her eyes.

"Me?" Glisa questioned, looking worried.

"No. Not you." Chelsea frowned. "Jess."

"_Riiight_." Glisa nodded.

"I have to wonder if all of us will even be in the challenge," Jack remarked. "Isaac and I don't have any rivalries to speak of. Neither do you." He glanced at Glisa. "Do you?"

"No way, _hombre_!" exclaimed Glisa, almost looking offended. She glanced at Isaac. "Well, unless you're still ticked off."

"I am," grumbled Isaac.

"Well…what if I sang you a song?"

"It wouldn't help your case."

"What if I sang you a song while Jack did a dance in the background?"

"Good Lord, no."

"Hey!" Jack protested.

"What if I," Glisa continued to offer, "barged into the villainesses' cabin using Aaron as a battering ram?"

"N—wait, what?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay, okay." Lacey exhaled noisily, and glanced at Sienna with a sardonic expression. The two of them were walking towards their cabin. "Maybe there's a chance I could beat Bren, if I somehow get the advantage. What _would_ I have an advantage in, do ya think?"

"Snarky comebacks?" Sienna suggested, with a nonchalant shrug. "If there's a 'yo-mama' challenge that could work."

"Well, there's a thought," commented Lacey, raising an eyebrow at the suggestion. "In any case, I don't think I could beat him in fighting."

With a little smirk, and a wistful look, Sienna replied: "You don't say…"

Lacey rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, subtle sarcasm and whatnot. I have to wonder what those challenges will be. Knowing Chris, they'll be strange."

"And peculiar," Sienna added.

"Very peculiar," Lacey agreed. "He has to come up with a bunch of them, right? I have a feeling some of them will be absolutely ridiculous. Like, fighting with Gilmore Girls DVDs as weapons, or swearing at each other in Cantonese."

"You know Cantonese?" Sienna asked, doubtfully.

"Uh... erhapspay Iway oday, Iennasay," Lacey retorted.

"Pig Latin," Sienna corrected. "Nice try, though."

"Anksthay," Lacey conceded. The two began heading up their cabin steps, but Sienna turned around, peered in the distance, and grew confused.

"Is that Glisa heading towards us…?" she asked Lacey. Curious, Lacey turned around, and squinted to make out the figure in the distance.

"Why is she carrying Aaron?" Lacey wondered, and then two girls' expressions grew freaked.

"Oh crap," Sienna groaned, clambering into the cabin. "Barricade the doorway. NOW."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"You're not telling me something, Foxy-Pants."

The door slammed, and Riley F. jumped, nearly falling out of his bed.

"Holy Alvin Greene," he complained, recovering from his momentary shock. "Lola. Kudos for the creepiest entrance up to season, but you're gonna need to give me a few moments until I can breathe again…"

"Laura," Lola began, her hands on her hips, and a scowl on her lips (unintentionally rhyme, I do it all the time). "Before she left, she made that comment on how she knew your secret. Nice cover-up with the 'Glee' crack, but I know you're lying. If we're on an alliance, we need to know each other's secrets. Tell me what you're really hiding before I decide to do something nasty."

"And that'd be different from your normal routine…_how_?" Riley questioned breezily.

Ignoring him, Lola continued to needle. "It has to do with that girl with the big mouth, right? Rosalina?" **(1)**

"Rosetta," Riley corrected, and then, in a not-so-smooth cover-up: "Not that I would know…"

Lola finally came to a stop in front of Riley's bunk, and knelt down, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Are you going out with this girl?"

"What?" scoffed Riley. "Of course not."

"Oh really," Lola said, clearly not convinced. She crossed her arms and sneered. "Ah, well, that's good, because she's a bit of a dunce, to be honest. All brawn, no brain."

"_Shut_ _up_—" Riley snarled, standing up abruptly. He paled, upon realization of his mistake.

Lola just grinned.

"Now then, if you want your secret safe, there's something you've got to do for me…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"You don't look so good," Zane noted, a tad concerned. Zarya, frizzy-haired and clearly unhappy, plumped down on the stump next to him.

"Headache," she muttered. "And our door is no longer with us."

"Rest in peace," Zane chuckled, with a little sign-of-the-cross. He figured it was better not to ask about it, in any case. The two sat in silence for a while, until Zane spoke up: "Zarya, I'm sorry if I insulted you, earlier. When we were on the docks. I didn't mean to bring up a touchy subject."

"Eh, it's fine," muttered Zarya in response. "I guess I kind of freaked out."

"Kind of," Zane agreed. Zarya shot Zane a furious look, and Zane raised an eyebrow, an orange-ish hue settling in his eyes. "Hey, well, we've both calmed down since our last season, at least. You haven't thrown a car at my head."

"Yet," Zarya pointed out.

"Well, I'm just glad we're on the same team," Zane mused. "You'd be a nightmare to face in…whatever this challenge is. And, I don't know…" he gave Zarya an awkward little smile. "It's…well, it's nice having you around."

Zarya looked surprised at this. Her features reddened, and she sharply looked down at her feet.

Zane blinked a few times, but then continued. "Zarya, I—"

But he didn't get to finish, seeing as Zarya proceeded to lean over and kiss him.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Damion put his hands behind his head, leaning back against a tree trunk. A few feet away sat Aaron, who was glaring at the notebook he was holding as if it had insulted his mother.

"Got anything yet?" Damion asked, after a bit.

"Not much…" Aaron sighed in response. "I'm a bit flat out of ideas. How about you?"

"Nothing comes to mind," Damion admitted. "I'm not really the scheming type."

"This is rather evil…" Aaron began to propose, "but would we need to find a way to get Mo and Jess to dislike each other."

"And then they'd wind up liking us?" guessed Damion.

"Absolutely!" Aaron grinned, and gave Damion a thumbs up.

"Is it fair of us to be doing this…?" Damion wondered, and he sighed. "Maybe we should just leave them be. I mean, not that I don't like Mo, and of course you like Jess, but maybe trying to break them up like this just isn't fair."

"Egad, man!" Aaron exclaimed. "But what if they don't know what they want? I mean, they aren't really even going out. They're still in that very awkward phase of things. I'm _almost_ certain they just need a _little_ convincing, and then everything will be A-OK!"

"What will be A-OK?" Demi asked the two, peering at them curiously. In actuality, Demi had been pretty close to them the whole time, the two boys just hadn't even noticed. In response to her voice, the two boys jumped in surprise. Demi was holding a book in her hands, and looked rather puzzled.

"Err…health care!" Aaron shouted. He then grabbed Damion by the shoulder and the two proceeded to dash off.

"Peculiar," noted Demi. "Then again, what isn't with those two…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Alright," Jess mused, as she slid into her seat at the circular table in the heroines' table. With her were Mo, Logan, and Arlen. "So you all know how to play Hearts?"

"Pretty well," Mo replied.

"Yes…and speaking of hearts, I've got room in mine…" Arlen remarked, making a heart with his hands and giving Jess a sultry wink.

"Save it for Chelsea," Jess snorted. She glanced at Logan. "How about you? Got a good grip on the rules?"

"Not completely," Logan admitted. "Can we go over it?"

"Sure," replied Jess. "The cards get divided between the four of us. One person starts, and we go around clockwise, disposing of our cards. When a person lays down a card, the other person has to follow suit. Unless they have none of the suit, in which case they can lay down something of another suit. When four cards are laid, the person with the highest card takes the four cards."

"However, you don't want to take hearts with your cards," Mo added. "Hearts are worth one point each. A queen of spades is worth thirteen points. That's pretty much the basics. First person to one-hundred points ends the game. And…at the end of the round, if you get all the points, that means you 'ran it', and you can either give everybody else twenty-six points or take twenty-six from your own total.

"And you can't lay down spades or hearts in the first turn or you'll get slapped," Arlen warned. "Got it, bro?"

"No," Logan groaned.

"Good!" Jess cheered.

"So, I suppose there's a reason Jess got the two 'bad boys' of the competition to join this card game…" Mo commented dryly, appraising Logan and Arlen with an inquisitive look. "What did she tell you we were playing for?"

"Mountain Dew," Arlen replied, smirking.

"She told me it was for money," Logan commented.

"Ah." Mo looked up at Jess. "You said it was for fun."

"Well then…" Jess cleared her throat. "It's for all three." She clunked a six-pack of Dew on the table. "So ante up."

"Are you sure I can't just ante up in fun?" Mo questioned, unable to hide a sarcastic expression.

"No," Jess replied, smoothly. "No you can not."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hey, Long," Kit-Kat greeted softly, climbing up the hill to where Long was situated. Long raised an eyebrow, surprised at his unexpected visitor, but he didn't seem annoyed.

"Hi, Kit-Kat…" From behind him, Kitsune poked a curious head out. Kit-Kat shyly squatted down, and asked Long if she could pet the fox. Long agreed; Kit-Kat stuck her hand out and stroked the top of Kitsune's head for a few moments.

"Why do you…" Kit-Kat hesitated, and then glanced at Long, a bit more serious now. "Why do you always go off by yourself?"

Long shrugged. "I find it hard to talk to people sometimes. The people here can be such…characters." (Fourth wall break? Perhaps.)

"You don't seem to have trouble talking to me," Kit-Kat noted.

Long smiled a bit. "I suppose you're right…"

_"CAMPERS!" _Chris's voice shouted via intercom, startling the two on the hill. _"I have all the kinks worked out now; I swear! Anyways, get your butts down to the docks, we're gonna start the second challenge!"_

"Well, let's go!" Kit-Kat said cheerfully, grabbing Long's hand without really realizing what she was doing. She turned red for a moment, and stuttered an apology, instantly releasing her grip.

"N…no…it's okay," Long mumbled in response, and nervously grabbed Kit-Kat's hand, making her blush even more.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"I TOLD you!" Jess shouted triumphantly, leering at Chris with a smirk. The Boat of Losers drove around to the docks, ready to take the campers to the stadium looming in the distance.

"Yeah, yeah," Chris grumbled. "It's not like anybody thought you were wrong."

"I did!" Aaron exclaimed.

"Nobody besides Aaron," Chris corrected himself. "Anyways, pile up campers; we're going on a road trip!"

"Aw, not this again," Rosetta groaned, glancing at the Boat of Losers with distaste. "We did this in our season. We had twenty-two campers when we had to go off the island, and we were barely able to fit them all in!"

"Which is why," Chris continued, with a mischievous grin, "there are six Jet-Skis off to my left. Heroes, you will be riding those. Villains, you'll be riding the Boat of Losers. Whoever gets to the stadium first will be able to pick the first challenge! But heroes, _all_ of you have to get there…

"So…" Chris continued. "Ready…set…GO!" Unprepared, the campers scrambled into their different modes of transportation—finding partners for the Jet-Skis and finding a driver for the Boat of Losers.

Halfway through the trip, a very panicky Lola was pestering Jack to drive faster.

"I don't think we need to worry," Jack noted dryly.

"Oh yeah?" Lola bit out. "Why is that?"

"Because some of them have no idea how to drive a Jet-Ski," Jack responded smoothly. Curious, Lola turned around. Sure enough, the majority of heroes were driving around in circles.

"Okay then," Lola corrected herself, turning back towards Jack. "Take as much time as you need."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

After the villains reached the island, and the boat was driven to pick up nearly all of the heroes, the twenty-three campers were gathered outside a massive, white stadium that had ivy crawling all over its walls. The stadium stretched around in a circle all around the island, and a long flight of stairs led up to the only entrance there was.

The inside of the stadium was much more high-tech than the outside. Two huge screens were placed on two opposite sides. The stadium was lit by some very colorful, flashing lights, and all the while some techno music pulsed in the background. In the middle of the stadium there was an elevated platform. However, the thousands and thousands of seats that were in the arena were all empty.

"Nice to know we're loved…" Riley S. commented dryly, peering at the barren surroundings. "Chris couldn't find anyone to be in our audience?"

"Maybe we just couldn't have one," Seth suggested, "because it'd be too difficult to arrange. With such short notice and all. I mean, this whole thing just pretty much fell from the sky a few hours ago, if I'm not mistaken."

"_Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls_!" Chris's voice boomed from surrounding speakers.

"We're one age group, here!" Lacey pointed out, raising an eyebrow. "What are we, ladies and gentlemen or boys and girls?"

"Maybe we're boys and girls," suggested Demi, "Chris is the gentleman and Chef is the lady?"

"Reasonable enough," Lacey agreed.

_"…whatever!" _Chris shouted, annoyed at the interruption. _"Anyways, villains won, so you will be able to pick the challenge. If you move to your seats, you'll find a list of the challenges underneath them. But remember, you're NOT allowed to talk to the camper who's going up! The first pair up to fight each other is…drum roll please…Jess and Chelsea!"_

The pyromaniac and the prankster glared at each other.

_"You two, up to the arena! The rest of you…move to your seats, now!"_

"Where are we sitting?" a confused Kit-Kat had to ask.

"_Oh, right. The seats are…ah…to your left."_

The campers began to move, and Chris sighed.

_"Your OTHER left."_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Jess and Chelsea stood at opposite ends of the arena, looking at each other warily. The villains were discussing what challenge to pick, and finally, Sienna hopped up with her team's choice.

"We choose…" Sienna announced. "A dance contest!"

Jess slapped her forehead. "You've got to be kidding me."

"Well, Chelsea _is_ good at dancing…" Sienna chuckled, and sat down. "So, whenever you're ready to go…"

Chris began playing some rap music in the background, and Chelsea began to break-dance.

"You sure I can't just blow something up, instead?" Jess questioned, glancing upwards. "In Chelsea's general direction?"

"Aw, you're just upset because you know you're gonna lose," Chelsea pointed out, looking smug as she did some sort of dance move that may or may not have a specific name. Jess, at a loss, looked at her teammates, desperate for some help.

"Jess!" Rosetta called out, as she leaned over the railing that separated the seats from the arena. "You're going to have to do…_that_ dance."

Jess widened her eyes, horrified. "Are you sure?"

"It's the only way!" Aaron cried out in agreement. Jess sighed solemnly, and suddenly began spinning around in a circle, sticking her arms straight up and flailing her hands around.

"STOP!" Jess shouted, after a few amusing yet frightening seconds of the competition. The music stopped, and even Chelsea did too. Jess cleared her throat, and bent down. "I lost my contact." She pretended to pick up a contact off of the ground. "Found it!" She exclaimed, and then she continued her spazzy dance.

By now most competitors were hopelessly confused.

After a minute or two, when Chris ordered the two girls to stop dancing, Chelsea exclaimed at Jess, "What the bloody hell was _that_?"

"That…" Jess replied, dramatically, "was the 'fork-in-the-garbage-disposal' dance." **(2)**

"You're kidding me."

"Youtube it," Jess suggested, smirking.

_"Jess wins!" _Chris announced. _"For an odd yet somewhat entertaining dance."_

The villains groaned; the heroes cheered, delighted yet surprised. Chelsea went up the staircase that led to the villains' section of the seats, and she began to apologize vehemently to her teammates. Jess climbed up the staircase next to that, and moved in with her own teammates, all the while met with high-fives and cheers.

**(Confession Cam: The result of censorship is &%$!#)**

** Chelsea—**"Well _that_ sucked. I should've known this competition values amusement over actual skill. Well, big whoop, Jess beat me. I don't really give a—"

**Chris—**"She was going to say 'fudge'. Really.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

_"Next up to fight…Logan and Seth!"_

"Ah, I really wish he wouldn't say we're fighting," Seth whispered to Riley S., sighing as he stood up. "The last thing I want to do is enter a fistfight with Logan."

"I have a bad feeling about this…" Riley S. muttered, glancing over at the villains. "Since they get to pick the challenge, you might be screwed." Seth looked a little annoyed at this statement, and with a scowl, he traipsed down to the arena.

"The challenge we pick is the water balloon fight," Jack announced. He turned towards Logan. "You have a good arm, don't you?"

"Of course," Logan replied, grinning as he flexed.

_"All right then! Now, this is where the extra player on the heroes' team comes in handy. One player won't participate in a duel, but will be an assistant for most of them. And that player is going to be…Damion! Damion, you're gonna step down onto the arena with the two boys."_

"Well…" Damion looked suspicious. "I guess…"

In a little bit, Seth, Logan, and Damion were down onto the arena. From a distance corner, Chef drove into the arena, _putt-putt-putting _on a motorized cooler. Once he reached the stairs he sighed, jumped off the cooler-scooter, and dragged the interesting transportation upwards, to the middle of the platform.

He popped it open; inside, it was filled with water balloons. Curious, Damion poked one—it was freezing cold.

_"Now then! Damion, you're gonna be driving that scooter around, wherever you feel like. However, you're not allowed to take a direct path towards either of the contestants. Meanwhile, Logan and Seth, you guys have to take the water balloons out of Damion's cooler and pelt each other with them. The driest person at the end will be the winner!_

_ "Now then…ready, set, GO!"_

With a yelp, Damion clambered onto the cooler-scooter and began driving it. However, it wasn't long until Logan pushed Damion off the scooter (it was going 4 MPH, so it wasn't exactly a hard fall). Logan then, without breaking a sweat, picked up the cooler and dumped its contents onto Seth.

**(Confession Cam: Hates the metric system)**

** Seth—**_(Is shivering and is soaked.) _"COME ON! That was hardly fair! Ack—just because I don't bench two-hundred, or whatever, doesn't mean…_ (Groans, sighs, wrings himself out a little more.) _"I'm a black belt! I don't need to be able to lift scooter-cooler's up and throw them at people. _(Looks down sadly.) _"I won't earn Riley's respect like _this_…"

**Damion—**_(Is rubbing his back in pain.) _"Ouch. That was, like, a five-foot fall…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

_"Interesting, very interesting…let's have Riley and Rosetta up next!"_

Riley swore under his breath; Rosetta tilted her head, saying nothing. The two walked down without so much as a word, and took their places on the arena.

**(Confession Cam: Center of the gossip that nobody cares about)**

** Riley F.—**"Well, yeah, of course I don't like fighting Rosetta. And the heroes had the advantage, so of course they were gonna pick something physical. And no, it's not just I know she's gonna win…I wouldn't like hurting her, whatever the means or the reason." _(Pauses.) _"Why do I have a feeling someone finds this amusing…?" **(3)**

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"We pick the sword fight!" Demi declared, only assuring Riley's fears. Damion, playing the part of the intern, walked up to the arena and handed them two swords that the two competitors actually did recognize.

"These look familiar," Rosetta noted. "Were these from the pirate challenge in our season?"

_"Yeah, they were!" _Chris affirmed. "_For those who don't know, they give you a shock if you get hit. Should be good fun."_

"Is that safe?" Kit-Kat questioned from the stands, wide-eyed. "Sharp swords that electrocute you, all the while?"

_"Oh they're not sharp, they're plastic!"_

Riley F. stared at the sword, clearly perturbed over the lack of logic this sword maintained. "What is this I don't even—"

_"Let's begin!"_

Rosetta moved forwards, swinging her swords down towards Riley's leg. Riley blocked her blow, pushing back, and the two parried back and forth for a little while. But what was a good duel without some witty banter?

"You _are_ the villain in this scenario," Rosetta pointed out, as she dodged back a few feet. She grinned. "Maybe you should be throwing out some puns. The electricity factor is sure to give you some options."

"Like what?" Riley questioned, smirking back at her. "How about, 'Rosetta, the result of this match might _shock _you. Or, here's one: '_Watt _are you waiting for, Rosie?'"

"Rosie?" Rosetta repeated, stifling laughter. "You had me going until 'Rosie'." Still smiling, she slashed her blade down, finally dislodging Riley's blade from his hands. She paused for a moment, her hands wrapped tightly around her blade.

For a silent moment, the two stared at each other.

"I don't like hiding things," Riley remarked, suddenly. Rosetta couldn't even question him about that—Riley pressed forwards and kissed Rosetta. Rosetta, shocked, dropped her blade—unfortunately it landed right on Riley's foot. A crackling noise was heard, and soon Riley was jumping back, nearly stumbling over himself.

"_Not_ how that was supposed to end," he gritted out, hopping up and down and holding his injured foot.

_"Well…Rosetta wins!" _Chris announced, struggling not to laugh. The two competitors eventually moved up to their spots. Riley got a few high-fives from the guys. He sat down, and turned his head, meeting Lola's gaze.

The queen bee gave him a cold stare. Riley raised his eyebrows and smirked in silent reply.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Next up were two very obvious rivals, Lacey and Bren.

The villains discussed heavily what they were to choose in order to help out Lacey, and eventually the answer came from Isaac.

The two were to have a duel of insults. With a cocky little grin, Lacey gave Sienna a questioning look. Sienna shrugged and grinned in response.

_"Alright! Let's get this show on the ROAD!" _Chris cheered.

Lacey cleared her throat. "So, Bren…I have to thank you. Since you've been around, my self-esteem has gone _way_ up."

Bren adjusted his glasses, before replying. "Well, that's good to hear. I was worried about you. I could've sworn that your hairstyle was masochism. Since it's not, I have to ask—what did you do to tick off your hairdresser?"

Lacey crossed her arms, defensive over her burgundy highlights. She gave Bren's long hair a mocking look. "At least I still _have_ a hairdresser. What, did yours elope with your optometrist?"

This went on for a while, and just about every mock-able aspect of Lacey and Bren was insulted. Admittedly though, some of the retorts were lacking. (Example: "Oh yeah, well, your face!")

In the end, Lacey was declared victor. She and Bren exchanged glances, but they didn't say anything more to each other.

"Man!" Chelsea exclaimed, unable to hide her laughter. "That was freaking awesome." She gave Lacey a congratulatory high-five "Excellent work, my friend. You still haven't told us, though, why do you and Bren hate each other so much?"

"Ah, long story," Lacey sighed, as she sat down next to the pyro. "This competition drives the worse out of people."

"Think you could've been friends with him, if the competition hadn't screwed things up?" Chelsea questioned.

Lacey shrugged. "I gotta be honest; I really don't know."

Elsewhere, Bren put his head in his hands as he took his seat near Riley S. and Seth.

"So, not the most successful plan, here," Bren noted.

"Ah, it's okay," Riley S. assured him. "You and Seth did the best you guys could."

"Alright, alright…" Bren sighed.

_"The score is two to two!" _Chris told the campers. _"Now then, how about we get…Glisa and Isaac!"_

"But we are not rivals!" Glisa protested. "I even used Aaron as a battering ram to prove it!"

"It's true," Zarya deadpanned, rolling her eyes.

_"Too bad! Get down there, you two!"_

Reluctantly, Glisa and Isaac did as they were told. The two trekked down to the platform and went to their opposing sides, and the heroes quietly discussed what they were to pick as the two's challenge.

"Alright!" Kit-Kat declared. "We're gonna pick the 'stamina' challenge!"

"And what might that entail?" Isaac questioned, looking to Glisa for an answer. She gave a mild shrug. Damion strolled into the arena, wheeling in what appeared to be a plastic tree. One branch jutted out, but that was it. Damion left the tree in front of the square Glisa and Isaac stood on.

"What is dis?" Glisa asked.

_"This is your challenge!" _Chris laughed in response. _"The two of you are to hang onto the tree until one person gets tired enough to let go. Since this might take awhile, you're gonna be doing it while the other challenges go on!"_

"There's no mattress underneath," Isaac noted, although he didn't seem too surprised.

_"It gives you incentive to win!" _Chris suggested.

"Dis was done in da season _de primero_!" Glisa protested.

"_Uh…we're…bringing back a classic_."

"Ay, ay, ay…" Glisa grumbled. She and Isaac moved towards the tree, and Damion propped up a ladder for the two to climb up on. They scooted down towards the branch, and dropped themselves until they were hanging by their hands.

_"Next up…" _Chris began, but the campers interrupted him.

"WAIT!" most of them shouted. "Who picks _this_ challenge?"

_"Oh yeah…well, I guess __I__ will!"_

"That can't be good…" Kit-Kat groaned.

_"So, anyways…we're starting to run out of rivalries…uh…Mo and Zarya, get down here!"_

"It was nice knowing you," Jess remarked, solemnly, as a reluctant Mo clambered down.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Chris?" Damion questioned, sounding worried. "How do I do this without hurting them?"

_"That…well…that's not important." _Chris replied.

"I hate this show," Mo groaned.

"I hate my life," Zarya muttered.

"I hate Chris's hair," Mo added.

"I hate country music!" Zarya exploded.

"How is that relevant?" Mo questioned, looking at Zarya with confusion.

"I don't know!" Zarya shouted. "I just hate it!"

Zarya and Mo were on little tricycles—bright pink ones, to make the matter worse. Damion stood nearby, armed with a sack of sports balls of pretty much every variety. Campers on the stands were wondering where the _hell_ this challenge came from.

Damion had been instructed by Chef to throw the balls at Mo and Zarya as they pedaled towards the opposite end of the platform. After a minute of waiting dreadfully, the siren sounded off, and the two incredibly embarrassed teenagers began pedaling their tricycles.

One thing that they didn't count on was the fact that Damion's aim was _terrible_. In the long, painful minutes that they had to wait for the race to be over, the footballs/soccer balls/basketballs/bowling balls went just about everywhere—on the platform, off the platform, in the stands—where they hit other competitors, and somehow one even hit Chris—who wasn't even in the arena.

"How did that even happen?" Damion wondered as Chris swore in pain.

Eventually, Zarya reached the end first. Grumbling to herself, she stood up the way-too-small tricycle, kicked it over, put it back up, and then kicked it over again.

_"Easy there!" _complained Chris. _"I stole those from my nieces!"_

**(Confession Cam: In case you're wondering, Villains: 3, Heroes: 2)**

** Zarya—**"As if this day hasn't been humiliating enough. After I…ah…kissed Zane, we both practically ran away from each other. Haven't talked to him since."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Next up to fight each other were the two polar opposites: Lola and Riley S. Smirking, the gamer strode down, confident in her abilities. Lola walked down in the same mannerisms, and the two girls stared each other down as Riley waited for her teammates to give her the verdict on the challenge choice.

When they announced a guitar hero challenge, Riley's grin only grew. Chef and Damion wheeled in the gaming system, and Chris soon announced that the guitars were the ones used in TDA—a wrong note, and you'd get shocked.

"Hope you don't mind a new hairstyle," Riley told Lola, breezily, "you might get a little…_poofier_, by the time this is done."

"Oh, give me a break, you skunk," Lola scoffed in response. "There's nothing hard about hitting a few buttons."

All over the world, distraught gamers gasped in indignation.

Unfazed, Riley continued to smile. "All right then, Lola. Suit yourself."

The song (Muse's "Hysteria") began as soon as the girls had their guitars ready, and it became clear in a matter of seconds that Lola had no idea what she was doing. Not long after that, following some mildly painful electrocutions, Lola threw her guitar down, obviously not wanting to get shocked anymore. Riley S. whooped as her fingers skimmed over the plastic guitar, hitting every note with perfection. The song ended, and a smug Riley threw her guitar down at Lola's feet.

"Trouble, Lola?" The gamer couldn't help but taunt. "I mean, come on: all you have to do is hit a few buttons."

Lola sneered. "Save the tough talk for someone who's actually afraid of you."

**(Confession Cam: Tied again, now three-to-three)**

** Demi: **"_Yeeeah_…the challenges seem to be making the rivalries worse, if that's even possible. Kit-Kat's not gonna be happy."

**Kit-Kat: **"Why do people hate being nice?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Jack and Long were the next two opponents to take the stage. The villains chose the wrestling challenge for the two to compete in, but they were not aware that the competitors were required to wear gigantic inflatable sumo suits.

"I honestly don't know what to say…" Long mumbled, appraising himself with a tired expression.

"I can't put my arms down," Jack complained, as he waddled a few steps forward.

"Lookin' good, Jack!" Isaac called out sarcastically, from the artificial tree.

"Lookin' stupid, Isaac!" Jack offered in equally sarcastic rebuttal.

The sound of a ringing gong sounded through the speakers, so Jack and Long figured they were up to go. Jack, with a long battle cry, charged towards Long. Long stayed in place. When Jack hit Long, the former ricocheted straight off and landed on his back.

"Sorry," Long apologized. "I'd offer you a hand, but I would probably end up falling on you…"

Jack just groaned. He groaned even louder when Chris announced that Long was the winner of that particular challenge, and it took a good few minutes after that to get the two of them successfully out of their suits.

**(Confession Cam: Villains—3, Heroes—4. We're being **_**helpful**_**!)**

** Jack—**"Only thing worse than losing is losing in a freaking sumo suit!"

**Long—**"I hope Kit-Kat found that as funny as I did…" _(Smiles shyly.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The next two contestants called up to the platform were Aaron and Arlen. The villains were a little uncertain of what they were to do—they began discussing it, and looking over their options.

"Is there an innuendo challenge?" Logan suggested, smirking.

"Unfortunately, no," Jack replied. He peered over the list, and frowned. "What else is Arlen good at?"

"Annoying people," Chelsea suggested, dryly.

"Excellent deduction, but still no dice," chuckled Lacey, frowning at the list.

"If I remember correctly…" Zane began, half-heartedly, "he said something about being good at starting fires…anything for that?"

Jack skimmed over the list, and raised an eyebrow. "Well…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"This cannot possibly be safe!" Damion complained, wringing his hands in distress. Brought up to the arena were all sorts of potentially dangerous explosion-causing things: fireworks, chemicals, and the like. The challenge was to make the best explosion.

**(Confession Cam: A word from our sponsor)**

** ?—**"Just a note: most people frown upon making things explode for kicks and giggles. We are not those people, but still. Don't do the dangerous bomb that Arlen is about to do. Aaron's bomb is fine, but for the love of God Arlen's is NOT. We'll give you snow cones if you comply!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Heh, heh…" Arlen chuckled devilishly as he rummaged through the materials. Things were placed in a rather convenient manner, so he happily slipped on some heavy gloves, scoured for a water bottle, found one, and filled it up a bit. He slipped the dry ice in, closed the bottle quickly, and chucked it far away, as fast as he could.

About twenty-five seconds later, the bottle exploded with a very impressive BOOM. The crowd ooh'd.

Aaron ooh'd as well, then turned back to his own experiment. Cheerfully, he grabbed a pack of Mentos, and not long after grabbed a two-liter bottle of diet coke.

"Uh-oh," Riley S. whispered. She turned to her alliance members. "Duck."

Bren and Seth didn't waste any time complying.

Cackling madly, Aaron picked up the Diet Coke and hurled it into the crowd of onlookers, mainly towards the villains. The Diet Coke started spewing and most, if not all, of the villains got sprayed.

"Impressive," Arlen complemented, grinning at Aaron a little. "I suppose your bomb is safer than mine."

"And it's refreshing!" Aaron hooted in reply, giving Arlen a thumbs-up.

"But who's the winner?" Arlen grumbled, looking towards the speakers in impatience.

_"For the reuse of the old favorite…" _Chris began.

"Damn it," Arlen swore. He glanced at Aaron. "That'd be you, dude."

"Really?" Aaron seemed genuinely surprised, but happy nonetheless.

"_Aaron scores a win for the heroes!"_

The heroes cheered; the villains started taking a liking to Pepsi.

**(Confession Cam: Villains—3, Heroes—5. Just…by the way…)**

** Jess—**"Ha! That was awesome! I almost forgot who funny Aaron could be." _(Continues laughing.) _"Oh explosions, you never get old…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Are we done yet?" Glisa groaned, hanging her head in fatigue, as her exhausted hands continued to hang on to the branch for dear life.

"Why yes, yes we are," Isaac said innocently. "Feel free to let go."

Glisa stuck her tongue out at the loner. "Nice try, but I am no _idiota_."

"Hm…" Isaac stared off to the distance. "Hey Glisa, do you like to wave with both hands?"

"I sure do!" Glisa cheered. "Let me show y—" she paused, and then glared at Isaac. "_Nice try_."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane and Demi were the next to go up. The agitated villains scoured through the list, and finally decided on one that they thought would be a good pick for Zane, although it was definitely a little odd.

The two contestants were to have a conversation in nothing but references. The first one to slip up would be the loser.

"Give me a moment to think…" Zane sighed, skimming through a mental list of what he had read and watched in the past. "Alright…you ready, Demi?"

"Sure am." The Goth smiled.

"Okay." Zane cleared his throat, and began. "Call me Ishmael."

Demi quirked an eyebrow. "Surely you can't be serious."

"I am serious," Zane replied, playing along, "and don't call me Shirley."

"What we've got here…is a failure to communicate," Demi complained.

"Inconceivable!" Zane shouted.

"You're not too smart, are you?" Demi observed. "I like that in a man."

"Get outta here!" growled Zane, all the while waving off the Goth. "And don't come back for five to seven days!"

Demi pretended to swoon. "Is this heaven?"

"No," Zane said dully. "This is Iowa."

"You've seen _Field of Dreams_?" Demi questioned, surprised, and then clamped her hand over her mouth when she realized she had just screwed herself over.

_"That was not a reference!"_ Chris proclaimed. _"At least, I'm pretty sure…anyways, Zane gets the tally for his team!"_

**(Confession Cam: Villains—4, Heroes—5. Yup.)**

** Zane—**_(Chuckles nervously.) _"That was actually kind of fun…I don't usually get to act out like that…Zarya probably thought I was being ballistic…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The final pair was Sienna and Kit-Kat. Heroes, getting nervous, starting skimming through the list.

"Oh no!" Seth groaned, fisting his eyes. "There aren't any cooking challenges! I guess that's reasonable, because it could take, like, over an hour…but still! I mean, come on, Kit-Kat's been whipping pastries out of hammerspace!"

Now very worried, the heroes were having trouble deciding on a different challenge.

Very spontaneously, Aaron hopped out of his chair.

"We pick the hot potato challenge!" He announced.

"What?" Rosetta questioned, eyes widening. "No we didn't!"

_"Too late!" _Chris cackled. Aaron got glares from just about every hero on the team. _"Kit-Kat, Sienna, come on down! This challenge is gonna be fun…"_

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Um…so what happens when this thing explodes…?" Kit-Kat questioned nervously, as she tossed the mysterious 'hot potato' around in her hands. In full honesty it didn't really deserve the title 'hot potato' considering that it was not hot, or a potato. It was simply a pink, plastic ball that seemed to be filled with…something.

"Don't know, don't want to know," Sienna sighed. She glanced up to the speakers. "When do we start, Chris?"

_"Right…now!" _Chris exclaimed, and with a yelp, Kit-Kat tossed the hot potato that was neither hot nor a potato over to Sienna.

Sienna spun it around in her hands for a few seconds. "Well this _sucks_, a challenge left up to luck…" Breezily, she tossed the ball back to Kit-Kat.

"Not very fun at all," Kit-Kat agreed, and she threw the ball back at Sienna.

The whole ordeal stretched on a bit too long, and both girls were both incredibly tense but at the same time hopelessly bored.

"Seen any good movies lately?" Sienna questioned.

Kit-Kat shrugged, meekly. "Something with Chris in it, actually, but it wasn't very good…"

_"Hey!" _Chris cried indignantly.

Finally, after two minutes of the back-and-forth, the pink ball beeped loudly in Kit-Kat's hands. She squeaked and flinched, waiting for something horrible to happen, but nothing did.

"This is the part where I sigh in relief and it explodes anyway, right?" Kit-Kat questioned miserably.

Sienna put her hands on her hips and smirked. "I believe so."

Kit-Kat sighed, but mostly in solemnity. The ball did explode, then, sending a flurry of sparkles and confetti towards Kit-Kat's face.

"Ack!" She groaned. She swatted at her face. "There's glitter in my _nose_!"

_"Sienna wins!" _Chris announced. The heroes sighed, but then turned to the tree in the hope that Glisa would be able to break the tie. However, just as they did so, Glisa was plummeting towards the ground.

"She had an itch she couldn't scratch…" Isaac explained to the crowd, half-heartedly.

_"Ha!" _Chris snickered. _"Well, that breaks the tie…heroes, decide who you want to vote off and meet me at the campfire, tonight! Villains, you're safe…for now!"_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Why the hell did you do that?" Lola hissed, jabbing a finger at Riley F.'s chest. The two were back at the island—but at least Lola had the sense to confront Riley near the forest, where nobody could see. (Asides from the millions of viewers watching and the substantially less numbered readers from behind the fourth wall.) Riley raised an eyebrow.

"You're gonna have to be more specific," he warned, cockily, "I've done a lot of things that could piss people off…"

"You _kissed_ her. Why did you _kiss_ Rosetta?"

"Look," Riley said, evenly. "I didn't want to do anything that could mess up Rosetta's chance in this competition. And, although neither of us had realized at the time, trying to hide our relationship would do just that."

"Is she mad at you for doing that?" Lola questioned.

"Actually, no," Riley sighed. "When I told her I didn't like 'hiding things', she assumed I meant it was that hiding our relationship was making me feel insecure about myself."

"Is that even possible?" Lola queried, scoffing at the proposition.

"For normal people, yes," Riley replied, with a forced grin. "Lola, I only did it to protect Rosetta. I'm still doing what you want me to do. I won't ruin your plan. But if everything blows up in our faces…" Riley shook his head. "I don't want to leave Rosetta with the short straw."

"Although _you_ still have the possibility of getting caught," Lola noted. She tilted her head. "Pretty noble of you, Mr. Foxy-Pants."

"Yeah, well, noble's my middle name. Either that, or Payton."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Guys…" Seth sighed, standing in front of the doorway of the boy heroes' cabin. "I don't know what to do. I'm worried Riley is gonna dump me for Bren, and…I need to win her back. Could you guys help?"

"My friend," Aaron proclaimed, with a broad grin, "you have come to the right place."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The campfire ceremony was at hand all too fast. The twelve heroes gathered on the logs, glancing at each other warily, everyone feeling suspicious and wracked with fear.

"Heroes!" Chris began, finally in person, as he strode up to the campfire with his platter of marshmallows. "You guys had the lead for a while, but then you just crashed and burned! You had to lose eventually, though—let's see who the unlucky loser is going to be." He began to hand out marshmallows.

"Jess. Riley. Rosetta. Bren. Seth. A very sparkly Kit-Kat. Damion. Long. Mo."

Three campers remained—Aaron, Glisa, and Demi. Chris gave them all a long, semi-serious look.

"Next marshmallow goes to…Glisa." The party animal let out a breath she had been holding as she caught her marshmallow.

"Now then…Demi, you made a very bad mistake on your challenge, and Aaron…you jumped the gun on choosing the challenge for Kit-Kat. Who's gonna be voted off? The final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Aaron."

Demi sighed, but stood up with dignity. The other hero girls enveloped her with a very sincere hug, and Demi hugged them back.

"It's been good, guys," she told them all, smiling sadly as the Boat of Losers drew up. "I'll see you at the finale!"

**(Confession Cam: Actions and motives)**

** Before the elimination:**

** Aaron—**"Demi seems like the likely choice—plus, she saw me and Damion plotting! That's not good!"

**Damion—**"It seems Aaron and I are in a semi-alliance, huh? I voted for Demi."

**Rosetta—**"That was really, really stupid of Aaron, but that also wasn't the brightest move by Demi. I have a feeling Aaron could be of use in future chapters…"

**Kit-Kat—**"I had to vote for Aaron! Demi is my friend, and she's still a great person!"

**Glisa—**"Adios, Aaron!"

**Riley S.—**"Well, I'm voting with Bren and Seth, as an alliance…I don't like it much, but I have to vote for Demi."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: Rapid-fire succession! Final words, round two)**

** Demi—**"Aw…I hadn't planned on going so soon. I was having fun. Kit-Kat, Glisa, Rosetta, Jess, and Riley, you guys are the best! I wish nothing but the best for you guys. Laura…uh…probably won't be the best company at the Playa de Losers, but I'll cope. Heck, maybe I'll get a chance to work on my novel. Anyways, see you guys later. Keep an eye out for me on the bookshelves." _(Smiles and waves goodbye.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Jess trudged past the beach, and then gaped at the distance yet again. Where the island and the stadium were…there was nothing. Both of them had disappeared as soon as they had arrived.

"NOT FUNNY!" She shouted, shaking a fist at the nearest camera.

()()()()()()()()()()()

**Who voted for whom?**

** Seth—**Demi

**Bren—**Demi

**Riley S.—**Demi

**Rosetta—**Demi

**Glisa—**Aaron

**Kit-Kat—**Aaron

**Demi—**Aaron

**Mo—**Glisa

**Jess—**Glisa

**Aaron—**Demi

**Damion—**Demi

**Long—**Aaron

**Demi: **Six

**Aaron: **Four

**Glisa: **Two

**(A.N.) **Alright! Apologies for voting of Demi—I hope that wasn't too rushed near the end. I'll be choosing the eliminations from henceforth! But hey, I'm a (somewhat) fair and decent person. My characters will get kicked off pretty soon, and whatnot.

I thank you for reading, if you did!

Check out the **poll** on my profile, if you would be so kind!

**(1)** Back-story time, whether you care or not. Quite a while back, I had just finished _Super Mario Galaxy_, and I really liked the character Rosalina. And later I found out her name in the Japanese version was Rosetta. I started to love that name. That's honestly where Rosetta was spawned from—I just really wanted a character with the name Rosetta.

And that, my friends, are how babies are born.

**(2) **"_Let's do the fork in the garbage disposal! Let's do the fork in the garbage disposal! DINK-DINK-DINK-A-DINK-DINK-D-DINK_-**Gets shot**

**(3) **Leave it to me to do a joke only I would get. In an original story of mine, Riley is much more cocky and evil, and Rosetta is much more temperamental and headstrong. The two are on two opposite "sides". Riley still flirts with her, but Rosetta hates him and the two fight, like, all the time.

Thanks again! You guys are the best! 


	6. Water Olympics Redux

**(A.N.) **Yes indeed, another chapter. I hope all your summers are filled with sun, surf, ice cream, and overall awesomeness.

Not much news on this end of the story, I'm not gonna lie…

This chapter is brought to you by: Flogging Molly, Dropkick Murphys, and The Young Dubliners. I'm feeling _Irish_ today.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, except for Riley F., and Rosetta. I also own Hazel, Beeper, Harper, and Lou…but you'll find out about them…later.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

For the recap, Chris's expression was pleasant, easygoing, and just slightly sadistic. As was the norm.

"Last time on Total Drama Island…

"Tension started to rise between the campers! Seth revealed his jealous and worry that Riley S. would dump his butt and hook up with Bren! So who did he turn to? Aaron, of course! The situation between Lola, Rosetta, and Riley F. got a lot…weirder, and we're pretty sure Lola and Riley F. have _something_ nasty plotted.

"All the while, Lacey and Bren's rivalry made no steps—and the same went for Riley S. and Lola. Zarya won her bout with Mo—and earlier, Zarya kissed Zane, out of nowhere! The two of them haven't managed to talk it out yet, and I can bet that there are gonna be some awkward moments in the future…ha! In the end, poor Demi ended up going home, for a mishap in her duel against Zane.

"So, what will become of these many, many rivalries? Are we gonna actually build some friendships for a change? Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? And who will get voted off and the most dramatic campfire ceremony yet, on Total…Drama…Island…_Heroes Versus Villains_!"

As he walked away, Chris muttered, "Least catchy name _ever_, dude…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

It was a beautiful day at Camp Wawanakwa.

The baby blue sky was filled with puffy, cotton-ball clouds. Underneath it lay the blue-green sea, unperturbed and sparkling. It was a perfect temperature—hot enough that the campers could stay in T-shirts and shorts, but not too hot that bears keeled over from heat exhaustion. It was absolutely perfect.

Something was bound to go wrong.

()()()()()()()()()()

"Time for grub, maggots!" Chef announced, as he strode into the mess hall. He dropped two gigantic bowls on both the heroes' table and the villains'. "Serve yourselves, 'cause I sure ain't doin' it!"

"No spoons, even?" Jack questioned, eyeing the food Chef had laid out with poorly-hidden disgust. "What, do you want us to use our hands?"

"Whatever works for you, fancy-boy!" Chef replied, shrugging as he retreated into his kitchen once again. The campers looked from each other, to their breakfast, back to the kitchen in the hopes that maybe Chef had been kidding.

"Alright," Lacey said, after some time. She grabbed a bowl with two hands and lifted it up a bit. "What would you guys give me to go back there and hit Chef with this?"

"Ten," Sienna pitched.

"Twenty," Isaac offered.

Riley F. clasped his hands together. "My soul. Do it, please."

**(Confession Cam: Going once, going twice)**

** Rosetta—**_(Grins mischievously.) _"Assuming you _have_ a soul, Riley."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The campers continued chatting amiably (the plan to ambush Chef sadly fell flat). They were all in a fairly good mood, but of course, there were a few exceptions.

Like, for example, Zane and Zarya were currently sitting as far as they possibly could from each other. The other villains hadn't appeared to notice it; or, if they had, they were being too polite to question about it. Then again, considering the people on the villains' team, it was very likely the former of the two.

Occasionally, the two loners would make eye contact with each other, only to look away just as quickly.

Unfortunately, their avoidance was soon brought to attention.

"What's up with you two?" Isaac asked bluntly, pointing back and forth between Zarya and Zane. Characteristically, neither of them gave an answer, they just looked at the table. Sienna cocked an eyebrow, and leaned forwards a bit.

"Ah. A lovers' spat?" She guessed, smirking.

No response came from either of them.

"Well," Lola remarked, breezily, "now you've got _me_ intrigued. If you don't tell me now, I'm just gonna find out later…" Unsurprisingly, the threat was met with silence, and Lola shrugged. "Suit yourselves."

"Any word on what the challenge is today?" Lacey questioned her teammates, a segue that Zane and Zarya were incredibly grateful for.

"Nothing yet," Logan told her. "At least, not anything as subtle as the out-of-the-blue stadium and island that appeared last time."

"So keep your eyes open for a mountain or a canyon or a small country to fall from the sky," Chelsea yawned, sarcasm heavy in her tone.

"If it's the small country we're calling it Arlenland!" Arlen proclaimed.

"Sounds too much like 'Ireland'…" Zarya muttered.

Jack gasped in mock surprise, wheeling towards Zarya. "Imagine that! It _talks_." Jack didn't bother insulting her any longer than that; Zarya shot him such a poisonous glare that Jack scooted away a few feet.

**(Confession Cam: Destination—Strong Badia. Population—Tire.)**

** Zarya—**"And everybody wonders whyI_ hate talking to people_."

**Zane—**"I am very surprised that Zarya didn't throw Jack through a window. _Very_ surprised."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Is it just my imagination, or are eliminations more…painful, this season?" Kit-Kat asked her fellow heroes.

"What do you mean?" Damion questioned.

"Well…" Kit-Kat frowned. "I mean, all of us have already participated in one season. People know us. Our good moments, our bad moments—"

"Even if the latter outweighs the former…" Long observed, with a quick little smile. Kit-Kat grinned at that.

"I think I get what you mean," Riley S. agreed. "It's hard to see us go. It was easier—especially the first season—when campers would leave and the audience wouldn't really care because they had no idea who they were. They didn't stick around long enough to have any…connection, or anything. They couldn't establish a reputation."

"But the longer the campers stuck around…" Mo prompted.

"The more grief from the audience," Bren finished, nodding in agreement. "Nobody wanted to see Duncan or Bridgette leave, but for Katie or Sadie…"

"Nobody likes Katie or Sadie anyway," grumbled Jess. "I'm not sure that example even counts."

"Aw, they're okay," Seth laughed. "A _little_ annoying, maybe."

"A little?" Aaron exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "I think everyone wanted to cause them _physical harm_."

"But besides dat," Glisa remarked. "It's not fun for _us_, either."

"Unless it's the villains who get voted off," Bren commented dryly. Seth and Riley S. nodded listlessly in agreement. A few feet away from them, Damion smirked and elbowed Rosetta, playfully.

"Except maybe in _your_ case, right?" He questioned her, grinning widely. Rosetta rolled her eyes, but blushed a bit. She glanced over her shoulder at Riley F., who gave her a cocky grin and a wave.

"Possibly," she replied, innocently, and left it at that.

"_Que hora es?" _Glisa wondered aloud. "You would think Chris would've shown up by now."

"Don't jinx it," suggested Mo, shaking his head. "Personally, I'd like to put off today's challenge for as long as possible."

"Amen to that," Seth chorused. He glanced down at a watch at his wrist. "Nine o' clock...I have to admit though, this is kind of weird. Chris didn't even wake us up early. _Suspicious_, no?"

"Ugh," Riley S. muttered, massaging her temples in aggravation. "I'm not in the mood for Chris to try and pull one over us."

"Crap," Rosetta sighed. "I hope that's not the case. Last time Chris showed up late for a challenge—for the season I was in, at least—it turned out to be some ridiculous concocted plot by Chris and Heather, working together."

Damion wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Now there's an apocalyptic combo."

Aaron thumped his fist on the table. "The suspense is killing me! Should we go ask Chef?"

The heroes exchanged glances.

"Never mind," came the unanimous answer.

"Hey, you guys!" Mo called to the villains. "Do you guys want to stick around here and wait for Chris, or just…kind of…leave…?"

"Leaving sounds like an _excellent_ idea," Chelsea remarked, standing up from her seat and cracking her neck. "I didn't sleep too well last night; I could use a nap."

"Allow me to join you," Arlen chuckled slyly, starting to stand up.

Chelsea brandished a lighter, threateningly. "Do so and I'll turn you into a Fantastic Four member."

Arlen looked confused.

"The Human Torch," Chelsea elaborated. Arlen's mouth dropped into an 'o', and he awkwardly sat back down.

"That was a bluff," Kit-Kat whispered to Long. "Right…?"

Long scratched the side of his head and answered, softly, "I wouldn't take the chance, if I were him…"

Gradually, the other campers dispersed as well, leaving in groups or individually. Soon only Riley F. and Lola were left in the mess hall.

"So," the queen bee began, eyeing Riley with slight suspicion. "I have to ask you. Why are you still agreeing to do this, even though you don't have your secret as risk anymore?"

Riley gave Lola a crooked grin.

"There's a _reason_ I'm on the villains' side, y'know."

Lola smirked. "I see. This should be fun. Is it gonna happen _this_ challenge, or…?"

"Depends on the challenge," Riley replied. "If it works out, it works out. But for now, we're gonna have to wait."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So what do you recommend I do, to win over Riley?" Seth asked, the slightest bit of impatience in his tone. He was in the heroes' cabin, along with Aaron, and Aaron was being a bit overdramatic, to say the least. The lights were dimmed and Aaron was sitting in a spinning chair, behind the heroes' only desk. Aaron's back was to Seth's, and Seth had the feeling that once Aaron spun around to face him he'd be petting a cat and speaking in a Russian accent.

Aaron spun around. There was no cat in sight. Still, Aaron was stroking his imaginary goatee, so that was an excellent substitute.

"Prove to her your worth!" Aaron told Seth, energetically pointing a finger in his direction.

"Um…okay. How would I go about doing that…?"

"I have no idea!" Aaron exclaimed, still enthusiastic. "Give me a moment!"

Seth waited a few seconds.

"Got it!" Aaron announced, after a moment's time. "It's simple! Score a win for the heroes, show Riley that you are _totally flippin' awesome_, and then she'll be all over you like syrup on pancakes!"

"What now?" Seth seemed puzzled. And a tad disturbed.

Impatient, Aaron shouted, "She'll wanna make out with you!"

"Oh!" Seth realized. "Oh. That's…that's good!"

"Indeed it is!" Aaron agreed. He waved Seth off, dismissively. "Now scamper off, I've got some plotting of my own to do!"

**(Confession Cam: New and improved, but just as abused)**

** Seth—**"Okay, so Aaron is strange. Very strange. But that advice…not too bad." _(He nods absentmindedly.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Riley S. slowed down to a stop, close to the woods, and sighed, sitting down next to Bren.

"I couldn't find Seth anywhere," she remarked, frowning. "He seems to be making himself scarce."

"Ah, well…" Bren paused, unsure how to proceed. "Should we put this meeting off till later then?"

"Any official decision, yeah," Riley S. agreed. She glanced at Bren. "Just out of curiosity, if we lose today, who do you want to vote off?"

"I think we should vote off Rosetta," Bren said bluntly. "I think that her relationship with Riley—the other Riley, of course—could put our team in jeopardy." Riley S. pondered this for a moment.

"I suppose that's reasonable enough," she admitted, after some time. "Sucks, though. I like Rosetta."

"Not to be cynical, but y'know, you've gotta play the game, and…" Bren's voice trailed off as he froze, his features paling. Riley found herself unable to speak, again, as a new figure walked on the scene.

"Ooh…plotting again, darlings?"

Riley raised her head to meet the newcomer's. "Monique," she greeted, half-heartedly.

**Flashback!**

_ "Seth, I think you're right on that account," Riley agreed. Relieved, Seth smiled. "We just have to make sure no one else finds out," she declared._

_ "Oh crap, do __not__ say that out loud!" Bren whispered harshly, covering his ears as if that would help in any way, shape, or form. "You're gonna jinx us!"_

_ "Oh come off it," Riley retorted, smirking. "You're so superstitious."_

_ "Ah, with good reason, too…" a new voice commented, startling the three alliance members."What have we here?"_

_ Shocked, the three alliance members turned their heads to see who had spoken. They didn't quiet recognize the person at first. The newcomer appeared to be female—she had long, black hair and tan skin. She wore makeup, red hoop earrings, a pretty red dress, and long heels._

_Bren blinked a few times, and then questioned, cautiously. "Mo…?"_

_ Mo put a hand on his hip, smirking at the trio. "Ah, call me Monique."_

_ "You're surprisingly convincing as a girl," Riley observed, tilting her head._

_ "I remember, now," Seth mused, snapping his fingers as a memory came back to him. "You, in your past season…you cross-dress when you're stressed out, right?"_

_ "Well that's…" Bren tilted his head. "Bizarre." Riley shrugged, and said, pleasantly:_

_ "To each his own, right?"_

_ "That's true, Riley darling, but that's not important right now, now is it?" Monique questioned, tut-tutting disapprovingly at the alliance members. "You three seem to be up to a little __disloyalty__, am I right?" _

_"It's not like that!" Riley insisted, her hands up, defensively. "We're targeting the villains, not the other heroes!"_

_ "And we've never vote __you__ off," Bren pointed out, his tone earnest. _

_ "Just please, please don't tell the other heroes…" Seth begged, pleadingly._

_ "Hm…Mo might not…" Monique hummed. She flipped her hair, and her lips curled into a wicked grin, as she sauntered off. "But __I__ just might."_

**Right here and now is a gift. That's why we call it the ****present****: **

"You said your alliance wasn't for ganging up on the heroes! You guys are such _liars_," Monique complained, wagging her finger at Seth and Riley S. "_Now_ I might just have to go and tell…but who? Riley F., perhaps? I'm sure he'd be _riveted_ to know you're targeting his girlfriend. Or maybe just any other hero would do…like Rosetta herself! It should be interesting to see this play out!"

"Ah…" Riley S. clenched her eyes, running her hands through her hair. "Anything, _anything_ for you to not tell. Name your price." Bren looked at Riley with concern, but couldn't object. What other choice did they have?

"Oh, but I already gave you a second chance, now didn't I?" Monique questioned them, an eyebrow raised. "Fool me twice, shame on me."

"Then we'll disband the alliance," Bren offered, hopefully.

"Oh, I know you can't keep that promise. Rather, instead, here's a little proposition for you. How about this? You can keep the alliance, on a few conditions. You never vote for me—or on my way out I'll happy shout at the heroes what you guys are up to. And...if there's someone I want off our team, you'll vote with me. Are we clear?"

With a slight tinge of sarcasm, Riley S. made the 'okay' sign with her hands. "Crystal."

"Good," Monique said, and smirked, as she walked away. "Laters!"

"Bye…" Bren grumbled lazily in response. He glanced at Riley S. "Add that to the list of failed alliances."

"Done and done," Riley S. sighed in response. "Let's go find Seth. He's not gonna be happy."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane hesitated at the doorway of the villainesses' cabin, one hand reached out partway to knock. He hoped to talk to Zarya, but wasn't sure he was up for the risk of meeting up with the other villain girls. Lacey and Chelsea seemed disinterested in the whole fiasco, but Sienna and Lola…not so much.

Sighing, he began to retreat, but stopped once he heard the door open a crack.

Not turning around, Zane asked hopefully, "Zarya?"

"Hm."

Zane turned around and met the Russian's eyes with a hint of a smirk. "I suppose only one villainess here speaks the language of the monosyllabic."

Zarya raised an eyebrow, unamused.

Cautiously, Zane advanced up a few steps, and appraised Zarya. "I think…I think we need to talk about what happened."

Zarya sighed, and leaned against the doorway. "There's nothing _to_ talk about," she muttered, running a hand through her hair. "I got…swept up. I was feeling…like, weirdly giddy and—"

"Giddy?" Zane repeated, wondering if he had heard her correctly.

"_And_—" Zarya continued, glaring now, "it was just…a spur-of-the-moment, thing ok? Can you just…" another sigh, and Zane's eyes fell to a dark gray color, "can you just pretend that it never happened?"

"Yeah…" Zane replied, slowly. He rubbed his arm. "Yeah. Okay…I…I'll see you later, Zarya."

Zarya closed the door, saying nothing.

**(Confession Cam: Two loners walk into a bar. The third one ducks.)**

** Zane—**_(Is currently burying his head in his hands. We can't quite make out what he's saying, it sounds something like aaarghryjdsfkdesz)._

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Not far off the coast of the Wawanakwa beach, a large pirate ship rolled in the waters. It was a magnificent ship, as far as vessels go—it was polished to the point that its black exterior sparkled. The sail of the ship was, interestingly enough, zebra print. Printed on the side of the ship in big, purple letters was the number _1097._

"Has anyone noticed how our ship has a nonsensical name?" One of the pirates of the ship observed, as she leaned over the side.

"Quiet!" The captain shouted at her, from the head of the ship. "Land is in sight! How are we handling, Harper?"

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO STEER THIS THING!" The only male pirate wailed, rocking back and forth in the fetal position.

"Good to hear!" The oblivious captain said cheerfully. "Full speed ahead…_towards Camp Wawanakwa_!"

()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay!" Jess exclaimed, cheerfully, as she appraised the group she had gathered. "Here's how the game _Mafia _works. You guys are all gonna close your eyes, first of all." The group of campers—Arlen, Kit-Kat, Rosetta, Glisa, Damion, Lacey, Sienna, Logan, Jack, and Isaac—did as they were told.

"Now then…" Jess continued. "I'm gonna tap you on the head—"

"Wait a second," Isaac interrupted. "What's your role in this game?"

"Oh, me?" Jess questioned. "I'm the narrator! The omniscient one in this game!"

"Good God," Jack grumbled.

"Now, now," Jess chastised, grinning crookedly, "don't call me that in public. _Anyways_…first off, I'm gonna tap a person on the head. The person who gets tapped is part of the mafia, and gets to kill people, but more on that later…" Jess ambled around the circle of campers—they were all outside, near the edge of the forest—and poked Kit-Kat.

"Okay…" Jess continued. "The person I tap next is going to be the 'nurse'...again; I'll explain that more later…" Jess walked around the circle, and finally tapped Jack to be the nurse.

"Finally, the sheriff…" The sheriff was to be Sienna. "There. The rest of you are civilians."

"Okay, so explain all our roles, then," Sienna ordered, impatiently.

"Sheesh! Alright, alright. Hm…once we start, all of you are gonna close your eyes. I'm gonna tell the mafia to wake up. They're gonna agree on a person to kill. After they close their eyes, the nurse will wake up. The nurse can point to one person they want to save—if they pick the person the mafia wanted to kill, that person won't get killed. After that the sheriff will wake up, and I'll tell the sheriff who the real mafia person is."

"But nobody knows each other's roles?" Glisa questioned.

"Correct!" Jess affirmed. "And you definitely can't tell anyone who you are, either. Not if you're the mafia—for obvious reasons, but also not if you're the nurse or the sheriff."

"What happens after the sheriff closes his-or-her eyes?" Lacey asked.

"After that," Jess replied, "I'll tell you who ended up dying—unless the nurse saved the person. After someone dies—or if someone doesn't—you can all decide who to kill off. You're trying to kill who you think is the mafia person. If you're right, I'll tell you. If you're wrong, I'll tell you, and then laugh at you. Ready for the super scary night?"

"Heck yes!" Damion whooped. "Let's do this!"

"Ay!" Glisa cheered as well. "We're gunna catch us a _murderer_!"

"Awesome! Everybody, close your eyes! No peeking, or I set a bottle rocket down your pants." The campers did as Jess told. "Alright, mafia—wake up!"

Kit-Kat opened her eyes, and looked around at the campers, nervously. Eventually, she pointed towards Logan. Jess nodded. "Mafia, go to sleep. Nurse…wake up!" Jack—who looked a little pissed off—opened his eyes. He looked at Jess, mouthing the words, _do I __have__ to? _Jess nodded stoically, and Jack rolled his eyes. Finally, he pointed towards Lacey. "Okay, sheriff—wake up!" Sienna opened her eyes, and Jess nonchalantly gestured towards Kit-Kat. Sienna smirked a bit. "Sheriff, go to sleep."

"Campers, villagers, whatever you want to be called…" Jess paused dramatically. "Wake up!" The campers all opened their eyes.

"Now what?" Lacey asked.

"Now…" Jess replied. "Now I tell the story! Alright, so, nine campers were walking in a lovely zoo…"

"What now?" Kit-Kat questioned, as confused as everybody else.

"It's a story! I'm telling you how the person died!"

"So someone _did_ die!" Damion exclaimed, frowning deeply.

"Just…" Jess was getting frustrated. "Just listen to the story! Okay, so nine campers were walking around in the zoo. Eventually, they came to the polar bear exhibit…"

"Uh-oh," Arlen gasped, sarcastically.

"It's always the polar bears," Rosetta lamented, shaking her head.

"Suddenly!" Jess exclaimed. "The sound of an ice cream truck distracted the campers…especially because the ice cream truck was on fire!"

"This is one hell of a zoo," Isaac commented.

"The campers all whipped around their heads—excited at the prospect of ice cream—but were hopelessly disappointed when they saw that the truck was on fire, and had just crashed into the flamingo exhibit. When they turned back, _someone_ had pushed _Logan_ into the _polar bear_ tank…"

Logan clutched his throat dramatically, and fell over to his back.

"So…" Lacey observed, "he..._choked_ while he was in the polar bear tank…?"

"Err…" Jess looked at Logan, disapprovingly. "He…got…attacked by the polar bears. And then he choked on…something. And then he died. But that…doesn't matter!"

"My death doesn't matter?" Logan complained. "That's a little harsh."

"Shut up!" Jess barked. "You're dead!"

Glisa raised her hand and questioned, "So…we didn't get ice cream?"

Jess sighed. "No. You didn't get ice cream."

"So now we decide who to kill off…" Jack mused. He surveyed the group of campers, and then looked at Jess, suspiciously. "Where were _you_ during all of this?"

"I _wasn't there_," Jess grumbled. "Just play the game and kill someone already!"

"It was Logan!" Arlen declared.

"Logan's _dead_!" Jess shouted at him.

Arlen frowned. "Oh. Right."

"I think it was Kit-Kat," Sienna announced, breezily. "She's looking mighty suspicious."

"Oh yeah?" Kit-Kat said in rebuttal. "I think it was…Isaac!"

"I agree with Kit-Kat," Damion announced.

"Well, I'm siding with Sienna…" Glisa mused. Other campers chimed in, most taking either Sienna or Kit-Kat's side. Eventually, Jess asked them who they thought was the culprit, and the overall vote ended up being against Isaac.

"Okay, so you're dead," Jess said casually. Isaac shrugged, and fell over. "Now then…you guys were…wrong! So, let's try night two…now then—" Jess was interrupted when an earsplitting _CRASH _rumbled through the trees. The campers yelped and ducked down, covering their heads.

"_It's the real mafia_!" Damion wailed.

_"Campers!" _Chris shouted, via intercom. "_It's time for the third challenge! Move towards the Dock of Shame…wait…uh-oh…I think they crashed into it."_

"Again?" Rosetta questioned, and then, "Wait…who're they?"

"_All in due time! Now move, move, move!"_

Grumbling, the campers did as they were told, moving into different groups of two or more.

"Wait," Kit-Kat called out. "Someone needs to go wake up Chelsea."

Arlen raised his hand, but Lacey pushed him aside and rolled her eyes. "_I'll_ do it, Hugh Hefner."

Damion walked with Rosetta, and the two were continuing a discussion they had earlier.

"Why don't you just tell Mo how you feel, instead of trying some underhanded scheme?" Rosetta asked, her hands in her pockets.

"It'd be too hard for me," Damion sighed, "and Aaron doesn't seem to think it's a good idea, anyways."

"Not to be paranoid, but…are you two in an alliance?" questioned Rosetta.

"Nah. Not really, anyways. But Aaron wants Jess and I…well, I like Mo, and…" uncomfortable, Damion began dragging his feet. "Err…do you know if Mo and Jess are actually going out?"

"I…" Rosetta hesitated. "Good question. I can ask her later, if you want."

Damion's face brightened. "Would you?"

Rosetta punched Damion on the arm, playfully. "Anything to help a loveless idiot like yourself."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Halfway to the beach, Chris warned them that they should probably go get changed into their swim suits. Irritated, they backtracked to their cabins and changed, finally making it to the beach. Once there, they couldn't help but gape at what they saw.

"I'm not the only one who sees a huge pirate ship with a zebra print sail…right?" Chelsea questioned the other twenty-one campers. They all nodded in response, everyone looking a tad frightened at the ship that now sat where the Dock of Shame once was.

"Rosetta," Riley F. whispered, putting a hand on his girlfriend's shoulder. "Getting a flashback?"

"Yeah…" Rosetta replied, frowning. "This happened in our season. Katie and Sadie were the pirates on the…" her sentence fell short, and her eyes widened in horror. "Oh, God."

"Hello, campers!" Chris greeted cheerfully, as he strode into sight. "Today's challenge is…The Water Olympics—Redux! As you might have guessed, this ship couldn't drive itself. You see, we've gotten four interns to help us out with today's challenge…would you like to meet them?"

"No," deadpanned Long. Kit-Kat elbowed him, disapprovingly. Suddenly, a ladder rolled down from the ship, and four interns scampered down it. The first was a tan girl, with black hair in a high ponytail, streaked with blonde. Her eyes were dark brown.

"I'm Hazel!" She exclaimed, her hands on her hips. "Greetings, fellow vertebrates! I'm sure it will be a pleasure getting to know you all, by either talking to you or causing you extreme physical torment in the challenges."

"Charmed," Lacey said, slowly.

Next to climb down a pale, stick thin girl. Her hair was choppy and black, and she wore lime green glasses in front of her brown eyes. A beanie beret sat upon her head, the same color as her glasses.

"Hi, hi, hi, everybody!" The girl chirped, bouncing up and down. "I'm Beeper! Well, my real name is Paige, but absolutely no one calls me that. If you call me Paige I'll probably hit you on the head! This is gonna be so incredibly awesome!"

"I'm frightened," Seth whimpered.

After Beeper, a young male began climbing down the ladder. However, three steps down, he stumbled and fell the rest of the way. He landed on his back and let out a small whimper. His hair was curly and brown, and his skin was fair.

"That's Harper," Hazel told the campers.

Riley S. tilted her head, and questioned, "Uh…is he alive?" In response, Harper weakly held up a thumbs up. The fourth and final 'pirate' slid down the ladder then, and landed on Harper. She stood up, dusted herself off, and glanced up at the campers. She had long, red hair, dark blue eyes, and an olive complexion.

"Lou," was all that the 'pirate' said.

"Hazel, Beeper, Harper, and Lou!" Chris repeated their names, and then grinned, happily. "They're gonna help us out today."

"Who are these crazies?" Lola complained. "What, are they brain-dead interns you hired for the job?"

"I'll have you know, we are proud Canadian pirates!" Hazel boomed, sounding insulted. She placed her hands on her hips. "We have matching jackets to prove it!" (Sure enough, the four of them wore black hoodies with a little zebra wearing a pirate hat on them.)

"I'd doubt that," Kit-Kat whispered to Long, "but I have to wonder where they got that ship…"

"So, let's cut to the chase," Mo suggested, back in his original garb. "What does this challenge entail?"

"There are going to be three water-related events," Chris replied. "But they're not going to be the same as they were, last season. The first event will be the treasure chest hunt! Everybody will be going with their whole team, and they have to follow their map to find the hidden chest…first one to find it wins the challenge! Simple enough, no?"

"And here are the totally flippin' awesome maps!" Beeper squealed. She whipped out two scrolls, and tossed them towards the campers. They were labeled to distinguish themselves.

"Wait a sec," Arlen drawled. "If these are the Water Olympics…what does this have to do with water?"

"That is something you shall find out later!" Hazel exclaimed in response. "Anyways, follow the maps to get your chest…and don't go after the other team's chest, or else. Got it?" Nods came in response. "Awesome. Now…three, two, one, GO!" screamed Hazel. She whipped out a whistle and blew on it so sharply that the campers covered their ears, and scattered away, getting away from the pirates while they still could.

()()()()()()()()()()

"Huh, this is kinda hard to follow…" Jack grumbled, squinting at the map. The eleven villains were wandering in a clump, with Jack hopelessly leading the group. Lacey pushed her way to the front.

"Let me see it," Lacey suggested. She took a swipe at the map but Jack held it above her reach, smirking at her efforts.

"You're kidding me, right?" Lacey growled, crossing her arms as she glared at the boy in front of her. "You're gonna play the height game? You're giving me total leeway to kick you in an _uncomfortable_ place."

"I have a feeling you're not joking," Jack commented, and he handed the map to Lacey.

"Smart choice," Lacey told him, grinning. She unrolled the scroll and peered at the map. It was yellowed, and did, surprisingly enough, look like an actual treasure map. Wawanakwa was drawn on it from an aerial view, and a dotted line marked the way through the island. Certain points were labeled—'mess hall', 'Dock of Shame', etc.

"Well, we can just take the shortest route to the final point, can't we?" Isaac questioned Lacey, peering over her shoulder to get a look at the map. "We just need to use displacement."

"Yeah, that's right," Lacey agreed. "Let's see here…where's the chest…looks like it should be near the Thousand-Foot Cliff."

"That's…a long way off…" Zarya sighed.

"Are we gonna have to climb it?" Chelsea questioned. "The cliff, I mean."

"We'd better not have to," Sienna said sourly. "Or I'm gonna get _pissed_."

"More pissed than usual?" Logan questioned, and Sienna sneered at him. Logan grinned. "Aw, calm down gorgeous, I'm only teasing you."

Sienna's lips twitched into a smirk. "Real smooth…although I _do_ appreciate the superficial complements."

"You know what else you might appreciate…?" Logan questioned her, with a sly wink. (Meanwhile, from the front of the group, Arlen shouted, "_Hey! _Only _I'm_ allowed to make vaguely suggestive comments!")

"Don't push your luck," Sienna warned, rolling her eyes. "Sheesh, you're lucky you're cute, or else…"

Logan raised an eyebrow, intrigued, and a bit smug at the 'cute' comment. "Or else what?"

Sienna flipped her hair, and actually looked a bit threatening. "Or it'd be '_good night, Manuel_'." **(1)**

"Good God," Lola groaned, from the front of the group. "Stop encouraging each other. We're gonna have to give Logan a flippin' time-out if this keeps going on."

"_For once_," Zane thought to himself, with a cursory glance towards Zarya. "_I actually agree with you, Lola_."

()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes, believe it or not, also found themselves moving towards The Thousand-Foot Cliff.

"I doubt we need to follow the path that closely…right?" Seth asked the others.

"That seems logical enough," Bren agreed. "Just get to the destination, get the chest, and win this round. Easy."

"Hopefully," Long mused.

Rosetta slunk back to talk to Jess, but not before giving Damion a discreet grin and wink.

"Hey, Jess," began Rosetta. "I was wondering…are you going out with Mo?" Jess raised an eyebrow, before glancing up at the Mohawk-donning guitarist at the front of the group.

"Well," Jess replied, hesitantly. She gave Rosetta a speculative look. "Why do you ask?"

"As a teenage girl…I suppose it's my prerogative," Rosetta chuckled. "I need some gossip, anyways."

"We aren't, actually," Jess admitted. "It's been kind of an awkward, 'just friends', sort of vibe going on. Think I should ask him out?" Rosetta blinked rapidly.

"Um…well…"

**(Confession Cam: Sweet, sweet, subterfuge)**

** Rosetta—**"I am _bloody flippin' terrible_ at this."

()()()()()()()()()

"So, how'd it go?" Damion asked Rosetta, who gave him a weak grin in response.

"Time for Plan B," she said awkwardly.

Damion gave her a hopeless look. "That _was_ Plan B."

"Then…Plan C."

"Which would be….?" Damion prompted.

Rosetta shrugged. "Hook up with Aaron?"

Damion slapped his forehead.

()()()()()()()()()

"Wait, wait, wait a sec…" Isaac said, narrowing his eyes. The eleven villains had just reached the base of the cliff, but the eleven heroes were there, as well. "Why are the heroes here, too?"

"Ah, I get it," Zane said quietly. "They set us up to push us together…now, we see who comes out on top. The two chests are next to each other, probably at the bottom of the lake."

"Well that's just great!" Lola exclaimed, slapping her forehead. "Who wants to run up and dive in to get the chest?"

"Already on it!" Logan chuckled, dashing up the steep incline. The heroes, seeing this, soon sent Glisa to follow in his tracks. The twenty remaining campers gathered at the base, watching the two campers run up, stop halfway, lean on their knees to get some breath, run a little more, fall down, get back up, chat to each other for a awhile, and then continue running till they reached the top.

The whole run to the top took them about twenty minutes. By the time they reached the top, many campers had left to go get a snack.

At the top of the cliff, Logan and Glisa peered down to the far-off waters of the Wawanakwa Lake.

"You first, _hombre_," Glisa said mildly.

"What? N…no! You go!" Logan complained, waving her off.

"No way, _compadre_! You know what is down there? Sharks! _No me gusta_!"

"Well, I'm not gonna go until you jump off this damn cliff too!"

"Okay," Glisa replied, shrugging. She took a few steps back, then took a running start, and jumped off the cliff, into a dive.

"Argh! I didn't mean for you to actually…" Logan scowled and jumped too, in a cannonball. The two campers fell for a while before landing in the water with a painful splash. They opened their eyes, scouring the bottom of the lake for any sign of a chest. Finally, Logan noted a brown chest sticking out of the ground. He tugged on its side till it was free, and then swam away, towing it along. (A shark came along at one point, but Logan shook a fist at it, and the shark swam away, looking insulted.)

Glisa noticed another chest sitting near the one Logan had taken, but upon examining it further, she shook her head, smiling to herself as she swam back to shore as well.

()()()()()()()()()()()

"You took the wrong chest!" Hazel howled, hitting Logan on the head with the butt of her plastic sword, repeatedly. "I specifically said for you to take the villains' chest! You are a disgrace to pirates everywhere, you sad, shirtless, not-pirate person!"

"OW!" Logan shouted, clutching his head, and backing away from the crazy pirate. "How was I supposed to know I took the heroes' chest?"

"It has the word 'heroes' on it in big letters," Harper pointed out meekly.

"The heroes' win this challenge!" Beeper announced, pumping a fist in the air. "Next is part two, oh boy! Here's how it works! Okay, so, like, one of your teammates will be stranded far off in the waters! The rest of you have to find out way to save the teammate!"

"Couldn't we just swim to them?" Seth asked.

The pirates all grinned in response.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Twenty campers stood on the shores of the Wawanakwa beach. Somewhere in the distance, Arlen and Long were sitting on little ducky floaties.

"Come to think of it," Seth observed. "Couldn't _they_ just swim back?"

"Nope!" Chris replied, observing this challenge with malevolent glee, "err…let's pretend they were in a horrible plane accident and are now legless."

"Oh, that's nothing," Isaac grumbled. "They could paddle with their arms."

"Well, then," Chris rebutted, "they're armless as well. Happy?"

"To have a wisecracking torso on the team?" Isaac questioned. He raised an eyebrow. "Come to think of it, that _is_ kinda cool."

"Uh, Chris?" Kit-Kat questioned. "Where did the, ah, 'pirates' go…?"

The ship suddenly loomed behind the two stranded campers, and several cannons poked out of the side of the ship.

"Oh dear God," whimpered Kit-Kat.

"Please don't tell me they're actually going to shoot _cannonballs_ at us…" Bren said nervously.

"Not quite," Chris admitted. "But they do have, well, just about every other object imaginable…"

True to Chris's words, the ship began shooting everything and anything at the campers—making rescue a very hard goal. Some of the objects included: tables, chairs, Tom Petty CDs, Rob Schneider movies, containers of mouthwash, Pop-Tarts, several rare books, fish, hobos, hobo fish, and…you get the point.

"Is that my wallet?" Chelsea questioned loudly, as a brown leather container flew over her head.

"Probably!" Lacey exclaimed in response. She waved the villains over closer to the shore. "C'mon, we need to get to Arlen before the heroes get Long!"

"Well, who's a good swimmer?" Jack asked the group.

Nobody spoke up—nobody wanted to go straight into the line of fire. Finally, Zarya sighed, impatiently.

"_I'll_ do it." Not meeting any objections, she ran towards the shore, and jumped in, diving underwater and progressing towards Arlen. The heroes, seeing this, quickly grouped together, trying to see who'd go get Long.

"Okay, we have to decide, and gotta do it fast…" Mo said firmly. "Who wants to go and save Long? Glisa, you were a good swimmer last challenge…"

"True, true, amigo, but I'm all tuckered out," Glisa admitted. "Not to mention, I am stinging like crazy from that dive. _Lo siento_."

"No, that's okay," Mo assured her, quickly, with a smile. "You were excellent last challenge."

Glisa took a little bow. "_Gracias_!"

"Not to ruin the feel-good moment here," Rosetta deadpanned. "But Zarya just saved Arlen."

True enough, Zarya had Arlen slung over her shoulder, and deposited him on the shore, stalking away before anyone could say anything.

"Impressive," Aaron remarked.

**(Confession Cam: Confess your secrets to us; we won't tell anyone!)**

** Aaron—**"And, to be perfectly honest, kinda hot."

()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, now it's time for the tie-breaker!" Hazel told the twenty-two campers. "Let's see, let's see, how might this go, what might this be…" She grinned, and snapped her fingers. "Time for tubing!"

"Tubing?" Jack repeated, surprised. "That actually sounds…fun."

"Fun…and Camp Wawanakwa?" Arlen questioned, bewildered. "It cannot be."

"It's the apocalypse," Riley F. agreed. "We'll be visited by insatiably vicious demons and all hope will be lost…" he paused. "Oh wait, that's already happened."

"How's this gonna work?" Aaron asked, suspiciously.

"It's simple!" Hazel assured them. "For three rounds, one hero and one villain will ride on a tube together. The one who falls off first loses the round."

"Right, right…" Chelsea nodded at this. "Now, what's the catch?"

"Well…Beeper is driving the boat."

Beeper gave an excited wave; the campers all looked miserable.

"Now then!" Hazel shouted. "Let's get started!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Unlike the other events, the people doing this challenge had been assigned by the pirates. The first two to go tubing were Long and Zane.

The two were terrified. Beeper was driving the boat, and even worse…Hazel was spotting them.

"Look," Zane told Long, evenly, before the girls started up the speedboat, "I won't try to push you off or any nonsense like that, if you promise me the same. Is that fair enough?"

"Yes," Long replied, warily, "but you wouldn't be able to push me off, anyways…"

This irked Zane, a bit. "Oh wouldn't I?"

"No," Long said simply. "You wouldn't." Beeper revved up the boat, and sped away through the lake, swerving rapidly, left and right. Zane was finding it hard to find the opportunity to try and push Long—it was hard enough just to try and stay on the tube.

Beeper veered left, and the tube skidded over the water, over the wake that Beeper left behind. Long and Zane flew up with their tube, and smacked on the water soon after.

Zane held a thumb down, the sign to go slower.

Hazel, seeing this, turned towards Beeper and shouted, "GO FASTER!"

"How did you not see that coming?" Long questioned, clutching the handles of the tube so tightly it hurt. Grinning to herself, Beeper floored it, and Zane yelped and held on for dear life. Frustrated, he rammed his side into Long. Long budged a half-inch, and looked at Zane, irritably. He lifted his foot and calmly kicked Zane, sending him flying off of the tube, into the water.

Hazel signaled for Beeper to stop the boat, and she did so.

"I told you…" Long told Zane, mildly, as he floated by. Zane's eyes faded to a light pink.

"Yes, and _thank_ you for that," he managed to get out, shivering all the while.

()()()()()()()()()

Next up on the tube were Seth and Riley F.

"Hey," Seth whispered to Riley, hopefully, as the girls prepared the boat. "I'm hoping you can help me with something, here."

"Ah, what's that?" Riley questioned, admittedly curious.

"Look, I'm trying to impress someone…"

"Who?"

Seth turned red. "It's Riley, actually…"

"Well!" Riley remarked. "I'm very flattered, but—"

"No, not _you_ Riley! The _other_ Riley!"

"Ah!" exclaimed Riley F. "That makes more sense, then. I see. You want me to throw the challenge so you can woo your crush…"

Seth chuckled nervously. "I suppose that's a bit too much to ask…"

Riley grinned crookedly. "Affirmative, soldier. As sympathetic as I am to your goals, I've got my own."

"Which are?" Seth questioned.

"Winning, of course."

The boat started then, and Beeper steered like even more of a drunkard. Eventually, Seth was flung off the tube. He poked his head up from the surface of the water, gasping for breath, and sighed, as the boat crawled back towards him to let him in.

**(Confession Cam: Why couldn't the teenager see the pirate movie?)**

** Seth—**"Y'know, this is my second time I'm sitting in here, soaking wet, and very, very, unhappy." _(Gives the camera a sad, Bambi-eye look, and sniffles a bit.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The final to campers to ride the tube were Jess and Lacey. The two gave each other confident smirks, and clamped on tightly to their handles.

Once Beeper started the boat and started to speed away, the girls each other gave a push or a shove here and there, but found they just couldn't knock each other off.

"You're pretty good!" Jess remarked, shouting over all the noise.

"Thanks!" Lacey replied. "You're not too bad yourself! Gone tubing before?"

"Yeah, a few times!"

"Me too!"

"Cool!"

"Yup!"

"We're just filling up space for the story now, aren't we?" Jess questioned.

"Pretty much!" Lacey shouted back.

Time progressed. Beeper was beginning to realize these two were nearly impossible to knock off. Gritting her teeth, she floored it again, steering the speed boat round and round in a circle. The wake grew larger and larger, and finally, it grew so _incredibly freaking large_ that the tube flew upwards, and then upside down, depositing the two girls riding it straight into the water.

"Whoa!" Hazel exclaimed, as Beeper slowed the boat down to a stop. "They fell at the exact same time. That, my friends, is an impressive feat."

"What do we do now…?" Lou asked quietly, sitting next to the pirate captain.

"Now…" Hazel chuckled. "Now we do what we're born to do! Grab your swords, girls!"

Harper looked sad.

"Oh yeah," Hazel realized. "You too, Harper."

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Wouldn't it be easier just to have us do another tubing run?" Kit-Kat questioned. The campers were on the Wawanakwa shore, waiting for the pirates to tell them what they were to do for the tie-breaker.

"Ah, but that would be _logical_ and _simple_," Chelsea deadpanned.

"And?" Kit-Kat seemed confused.

"And think of what show we're on," Aaron added.

"Oh," Kit-Kat mused. "Right."

"So we're having a tie-breaker," Arlen said, impatiently. "What is it?"

"Well…" Hazel grinned widely. "It's not your normal tie-breaker. We're gonna chase you all with swords, see. The first one to get tagged by us goes home, regardless of what team you're on."

The campers widened their eyes, frightened by this prospect.

"However!" Hazel continued. "There's a safe zone. And the safe zone is…the mess hall. Once you reach there, you're safe. And, of course, if someone gets tagged before you…then you'll be safe too! However, if all of you make it, then there will be no elimination for this challenge! Got it?"

"Unfortunately," Seth responded, grimacing, "I think we do."

"Great, it's the _escape-a-bear_ tactic," Rosetta remarked. "Where you don't have to run faster than the bear…you just have to run faster than your friend."

"Excellent point!" agreed Hazel. "Anyways, you have ten seconds before we chase after you. Ten, nine…"

The campers dashed off. Once Hazel got to 'one', the four pirates sprinted after them, brandishing their plastic swords and waving them just about as threateningly as one can wave a plastic sword.

Thankfully, the pirates weren't the best of runners. Harper was too nervous to try and tag anybody, so he laid down his sword and ran back to the ship. Lou got bored after running a few feet, and she sat down and promptly took a nap. Only Hazel and Beeper were the real threats.

It was every man (or woman) for him (or her) self.

Most campers made it to the mess-hall, in fact, all but two did. Beeper had herded them away from the rest of the mass, and managed to get them way off from their direction. The two of them had to climb up a tree just to avoid the psychopathic blabbering pirate.

And those two were Logan and Isaac.

"I'm like, really, really, sorry about this!" Beeper told them, cupping her hands around her mouth. "But I'm getting paid! Or at least, I think I am! At the very least, I get to keep this awesome jacket!"

"Good Lord," Isaac sighed, kneading the side of his head. "This is gonna be a nightmare. Logan, maybe we could…okay, I don't know how we're gonna get out of this. Do you have any idea what we could—?"

Logan was looking at Isaac oddly. Evilly, actually. Suddenly, Logan whipped his hand out, knocking Isaac from the branch. Surprised, Isaac only barely managed to grab the branch before falling down.

"I would say I'm sorry," Logan remarked, "but I'm really not."

Isaac narrowed his eyes. "You son of a bi—"

Logan pried Isaac's hands from the branch, and down Logan fell. Happily, Beeper patted Isaac on the head. "Looks like you're going home!" She chirped.

Isaac just continued glaring at Logan—the former continued smirking at him from atop the tree branch. "Looks like it," Isaac agreed.

()()()()()()()()()

Isaac was promptly led to the Dock of Shame—his teammates, still hiding out in the mess hall, didn't even get a chance to tell him goodbye.

"C'mon," he pleaded, as Chef led him to the Boat of Losers, "at least let me say goodbye to Jack."

"No can do," Chef said gruffly, pushing Isaac into the boat. It sped away soon after, taking Isaac far away from Camp Wawanakwa.

()()()()()()()()()

Logan walked into the mess hall, looking downright forlorn.

"No!" Jack exclaimed, standing up and slamming his hands on the bench. "Isaac got caught?"

"That crazy chick Beeper got him," Logan snarled, shaking his head. "She got us both away from the group and…and Isaac fell behind." Jack swore, loudly, and fell back down into a sitting position.

"Well, nothing more we can do about it," Lacey remarked. "I suppose it's time for dinner, isn't it?"

"I hope not," Lola commented dryly.

"Campers!" Chris greeted, walking into the mess hall. "Quiet a day, huh?"

"Those 'pirates' were freaking insane!" Jess shouted. "Where did they even come from?"

"To be perfectly honest…I have no idea," Chris admitted. "But hey, they were willing to do it for free, so…" his sentence died. Suddenly, he looked confused. "Hey, who brought my TV back into here? I thought I took it out after I had to watch that stupid Nebraska slideshow…" Confused, Chris walked over to the TV, and examined it. "Huh, there's something in the tray…"

"Press play!" Glisa chirped. "Let's see what it is!"

"There better not be a creepy chick to pop up and say 'seven days'…" Damion complained. Regardless of that comment, Chris pressed play, and the campers became shocked when they saw who were on the screen:

_"You don't look so good," Zane noted, a tad concerned. Zarya, frizzy-haired and clearly unhappy, plumped down on the stump next to him._

_ "Headache," she muttered. "And our door is no longer with us."_

_ "Rest in peace," Zane chuckled, with a little sign-of-the-cross. He figured it was better not to ask about it, in any case. The two sat in silence for a while, until Zane spoke up: "Zarya, I'm sorry if I insulted you, earlier. When we were on the docks. I didn't mean to bring up a touchy subject."_

"What…what's going on?" Zane questioned, confused. Nobody answered him. The scene progressed.

_"Eh, it's fine," muttered Zarya in response. "I guess I kind of freaked out."_

_ "Kind of," Zane agreed. Zarya shot Zane a furious look, and Zane raised an eyebrow, an orange-ish hue settling in his eyes. "Hey, well, we've both calmed down since our last season, at least. You haven't thrown a car at my head."_

_ "Yet," Zarya pointed out._

_ "Well, I'm just glad we're on the same team," Zane mused. "You'd be a nightmare to face in…whatever this challenge is. And, I don't know…" he gave Zarya an awkward little smile. "It's…well, it's nice having you around."_

"Oh no," Zane whispered, his eyes widening. "Oh no, oh no, somebody press stop, please…" nobody did so, and the scene continued:

_ Zarya looked surprised at this. Her features reddened, and she sharply looked down at her feet._

_ Zane blinked a few times, but then continued. "Zarya, I—"_

_ But he didn't get to finish, seeing as Zarya proceeded to lean over and kiss him._

The kiss was met with several reactions—some were shocked into silence, and a few of the villains actually laughed.

Zarya looked at Zane, teary-eyed, her eyes filled with resent.

"Z-Zarya," Zane stammered. "I didn't do this. I don't know how this happened—"

"Shut up!" Zarya shouted, stumbling to her feet. "I told you not to just forget about it! I told you to keep it a secret! Why couldn't you—why couldn't you just _listen_?"

"No, Zarya, I didn't do this!" Zane pleaded. Zarya just swore at him, and ran out the door. Zane looked back the villains—his eyes a bright green color—before following Zarya, as well.

"Wow," Aaron said. Frowning, he began to glare at some of the other campers. "Who did that? That really wasn't cool."

The campers glanced at each other, wondering the same thing, but no answer came.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Damion trudged into his cabin, exhausted. He flopped onto his bed and closed his eyes. The rest of the cabin was empty, and it stayed like that for a while, until Mo walked in. The guitarist walked in slowly, and seemed a bit solemn. Curious, Damion glanced at him.

"You okay?" he asked. Mo looked surprised.

"Err…yeah, I'm okay," Mo lied. "Just a little…conflicted."

"About what?"

"Ah, it's nothing," Mo told Damion, dismissively.

"Well…if you ever want to talk about it, I'd be glad to put in my two cents. Or a whole quarter, if I'm feeling generous."

Mo grinned. "I'll keep that in mind."

Damion grinned back.

**(Confession Cam: High-flying underdogs)**

** Damion—**_(Punches a fist in the air.) _"Score!"

()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: He gets the last words…if nothing else)**

** Isaac—**"You have no idea how hard it is not to just swear like a sailor right now. That…that…_douche_ Logan betrayed me, and didn't even have to give it a second thought. Worst of all, I couldn't even warn Jack about him. Fine. No...it's not fine, but I'm just gonna have to get over it. Jack will win this. Then we can pay Beeper to stalk Logan or something. Yeah…that sounds nice."

()()()()()()()()()

**(A.N.) **Alright! So there you have it. Many plot progressions coming up, and although I'm ripping this from many, many people, here are some things to ponder—

1) What will happen to Zane and Zarya? Who exploited them like that?

2) What are Lola and Riley F. planning?

3) Will Damion get Mo?

4) Will Aaron get Jess?

5) Will Logan betray Jack as well?

6) Will Seth get back Riley S.?

7) And what will happen to the Seth-Bren-Riley alliance?

8) Seriously, who took the cookie from the cookie jar?

**(1) **Mass Effect reference! I love BioWare. You can thank them for delaying this chapter quite a bit—I've been replaying KOtOR. I had forgotten how incredibly awesome Carth Onasi and HK-47 are.

…I'm sorry if you didn't understand any of that.

Thanks for reading, and **check out the new poll**, if you would be so kind.

Later!


	7. It's a Trap!

**(A.N.) **Star Wars reference in the chapter title. Yay.

Nothing of relevance to put up here. Enjoy the chapter, everybody!

This chapter is brought to you by: the letter _Q_. (Yes, I had to do that reference eventually.)

**Disclaimer: **I own Riley F., Rosetta, and all of these lame jokes. Everything else? Not mine.

()()()()()()()()

"Last time…" Chris began, "on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains…

"Pirates stopped by for a visit, and brought to the campers the third challenge—the second official 'Water Olympics'! The challenge included cliff diving, saving cast-offs, and tubing. Meanwhile, the discoverer of the Seth-Riley S.-Bren alliance was discovered…it was Mo, as his cross-dressing other self, Monique! Some of the other subplots were milked even more—Riley F. and Lola's plotting, Zane and Zarya's troubles, and Seth vying to get Riley S. back.

"In a crazy sudden death elimination, Logan wasted no time letting Isaac get caught, and resultantly, get eliminated. Once back with the others, he lied to Jack and said there was nothing he could've done to save him. In a shocker to end the night, someone exploited Zane and Zarya's relationship…leaving Zarya in tears, and angry at Zane, who had nothing to do with the whole fiasco. Quite a night.

"So, what's to come of all these love troubles? What challenge will be in store for the campers? And who will be eliminated, on the _most_ dramatic—seriously, we're not kidding about this one—_most_ dramatic campfire ceremony _yet_…on TDI: _Heroes Versus Villains_!"

**(A.N.) Just for kicks, here's the intro! The theme song would still be "I Wanna Be Famous".**

_The camera zooms through Camp Wawanakwa, stopping near the forest where Glisa is sitting on a tree branch. She waves excitedly and stands up, but the branch under her breaks and she falls. She stands up and steps back as Logan, Jack, and Isaac run by, being chased by some angry looking bunnies. _

_The trio run to a clearing, where Mo is seen playing his guitar. Jess is sitting nearby and listening intently. From behind a nearby tree trunk, Damion and Aaron poke their heads out. The camera moves rapidly to the mess hall, in the kitchen, where Kit-Kat pulls a tray of cookies out of the oven. She turns around only to see an angry Chef; soon after, she drops the tray and runs out, frightened._

_ In the commons, Demi and Bren are pushing a scary-looking plate of food back and forth. The camera moves out, to the top of the mess hall, where Long can be seen reading a book. Behind the mess hall, Zane and Zarya are sitting side-by-side and talking. Upon seeing the camera, Zarya shakes her fist at it, and it moves away. _

_ Near the cabins, Riley F. puts his arm around Rosetta, and hands her a bouquet of flowers. Rosetta blushes, grins, and takes them. The two walk off. Seth, seeing this, picks a few flowers from the ground and hands them to Riley S. Riley looks pleased and surprised, but a few bees soon swarm near the two and they run off towards the beach and jump in the water, frantically._

_ On the beach, Arlen is posing in front of Chelsea, who is playing with a lighter, absentmindedly. Laura and Lola are sunbathing and nearby, Lacey and Sienna are playing with a Frisbee. Sienna's throw goes awry and hits the camera. The camera spins around a few times until it focuses in on a campfire that the twenty-four teens are sitting around. The camera drifts up to the night sky, and the logo for the show comes on the screen._

()()()()()()()()()

A ballistic-sounding siren rang through the campgrounds, scaring the campers straight out of their beds.

"I'm going to walk up to Chris and punch him in the face," Jess growled, starting to walk straight out the door in her pajamas. Kit-Kat, sighing, put a restraining hand on Jess's shoulder and drew her back.

"Not the best idea. A tempting one, but not a good one."

"Come on," Jess pleaded, "just a little punch."

"Not till after lunch," Rosetta yawned. A handful of clothes were tucked underneath her arm. "Let's just get dressed for now and save the unadulterated violence for later."

Kit-Kat looked at Rosetta, miserably. "That…doesn't help."

Rosetta gave Kit-Kat a tired grin. "I do what I can."

Riley S., who was combing through her suitcase for clothes, looked up, and smirked. "You're starting to sound a lot like your boyfriend."

"Now there's a scary thought," Rosetta laughed. "_My_ love life aside…how are things going for you and Seth, Riley?"

Riley looked surprised she asked. Reddened, she looked down at her suitcase. "Oh…err…we're not really an item, I guess…"

"Really?" Glisa questioned, popping up from her bed. "You guys seem to get along so _bien_."

"Well, he hasn't made a move yet," Riley mumbled, dismissively. Hopeful to change the subject, she looked up at Kit-Kat. "How about you and Long, Kit-Kat? You guys are really cute together."

"Ah!" Kit-Kat blushed. "Long is really sweet…I don't know if he likes me, though."

"I'm almost certain he does," Rosetta assured her. "You're pretty much the only one he talks to."

"And you, Jess?" Riley asked. "Have you asked out Mo yet?"

"Not yet," Jess admitted. "I still don't know if I will. Things have been kind of awkward between us. I mean, we still get along really well, but it's been…yeah, kind of awkward-feeling. How about you, Glisa?" Jess grinned, teasingly raising an eyebrow. "Anybody catching your interest?"

"Well…" Glisa remarked, resting her elbow on her knee. She tapped her chin, thoughtfully. "Isaac was kind of _guapo _but he's _gone_ now."

"Guapo is a _good_ thing, right?" Riley asked. Glisa nodded.

"Sorry about that, then," Riley commented, sympathetically. "I still can't believe how…spontaneous that elimination was. A sudden-death challenge like that doesn't even give us much of a sporting chance." She paused for a moment. "Err…to clarify, what I mean is that it wasn't very fun to have an elimination without any voting."

"If given the chance, which of the villains would've been voted off, do you think?" Jess questioned her fellow heroines.

"Hopefully Lola," Riley S. muttered, sourly.

"Why do you hate her so much?" Kit-Kat asked.

"She's just a…" Riley waved her hand, scowling. "She's not my favorite person, if you _know what I mean_."

"_I_ know what you mean!" Glisa cheered.

Rosetta shrugged, and grinned at Riley. "I suppose there's one in every reality show."

"Or in our case…" Riley S. sighed. "Twelve."

()()()()()()()()

Meanwhile, in the heroes' cabin, there was a lack of death threats that was replaced with a _somewhat_ pertinent conversation.

"So…who showed that video?" Bren asked, sifting through his belongings for a decent shirt. "The one of Zane and Zarya, I mean. None of you guys, I hope."

"Not I," Aaron replied, firmly. "It was kind of a douche thing to do. I have all the sympathy in the world for a guy going after an unreachable girl." Aaron thumped his chest with his fist. "Solidarity, sister!"

Seth raised an eyebrow at Aaron.

Aaron corrected himself, "In a…_manly_ way…"

"I'd like to figure out who did that, personally," Seth commented. He frowned. "I already have a good idea of who it would be."

"Lola?" Mo guessed. "You've been after her hide since we've got here."

"Well, I can't imagine who else would do something like that," Seth commented. He felt weird talking to Mo so casually, now that Mo knew their secret, but he certainly couldn't let Aaron, Long, or Damion catch on to what was going on, or else he, Bren, and Riley S. would be screwed. "_Logan's_ certainly gotten meaner since last season…but I don't think he's smart enough to pull something that underhanded." Seth shifted his eyes around the room. "And…here's to hoping he's nowhere in hearing distance…"

"We should probably start heading to the mess hall, and worry about all that stuff then. Maybe the girls will have something to say about it…" Bren remarked. "I'm off to the washrooms; I'll see you guys later."

"Bye," Seth replied, and then looked around the room, curiously. "Wait, is Long already gone?"

"Seems like it," Aaron agreed, and then flopped back onto his bed. "What I wouldn't give to be a ninja…"

"What I wouldn't give for a darn washing machine," Damion complained, looking at his clothes with dismay.

"There's a lake," Mo offered. "Avoid the crocodiles and you should be good to go."

"Hilarious," Damion grumbled. "Too bad I don't have a washboard for it."

Mo pondered that for a moment. "Crocodile backs might work…"

"Enough about the crocodiles!"

Mo held his hands up defensively. "I'm just giving you your options!" He amended, innocently, to the flustered teen.

"Fine, fine…"

Mo waited a few seconds, before speaking up again. "What about _alliga_—"

Damion cut him off with a nicely-aimed throw of a shoe.

()()()()()()()()

The heroines walked into the mess hall. The doors were unlocked, but they were surprised to see that nobody was in there—even Chef was nowhere in sight.

"Are we early?" Kit-Kat asked.

"I can't imagine that's the explanation," Rosetta remarked. "The sirens went throughout the whole campground…so everyone should be up. The others should be here pretty soon."

"Here come _los heroes_," Glisa announced. She pointed outside the mess hall window, where sure enough the six guys were walking up to the door. "But da villains are nowhere in sight."

Riley S. chuckled at this, and slid into a bench on the heroes' table. "Good. Can we eat breakfast and enjoy the peace while we can?"

The doors swung open then, and the six hero guys ambled in.

"Hey girls!" Seth greeted cheerfully, and then, with a frown, "Wait—Long isn't here either?"

"No," Kit-Kat responded. She looked worried. "Where might he be?"

"I doubt anything bad has happened to him," Mo commented. "It's the lack of villains that worries me."

"You guys haven't seen any of them yet, either?" Rosetta questioned.

Bren shook his head. "At least, not on our way here. I have a bad feeling this is going to tie in with the challenge."

"Okay, good, so we've discovered the mystery," Riley spoke up, quickly, and dismissively. "C'mon Kit-Kat, whip up some cinnamon rolls and we can have a nice breakfast for once."

Glisa, out of curiosity, ran over to the kitchen and poked the door open a tad. "Chef isn't here!" She announced, and retreated back towards the heroes.

"This is frightening," Kit-Kat admitted. "Chef might be…instructing them to ambush us or…or freak us out or…" grimacing, she plopped herself down on her bench. "I don't even want to think about it!"

"If that's the case, then Chris should pop up soon to tell us what's going on…" Jess mused. "To give us at least a _bit_ of a heads up."

"While we _wait_ for him we could _eat_," Riley tried for, again, but the conversation continued.

"Is there anything we could do to prepare ourselves?" Damion questioned the others.

"Not really," Rosetta replied. "We don't know what this is going to entail. Until someone gives us some info—_if_ someone gives us some info—we're stuck."

Long walked into the mess hall then, but he froze when ten pairs of eyes whipped towards him.

"Hello…" he said cautiously.

"Where've you been?" Bren asked him. "Sorry, I don't mean to sound like an overprotective mom, but all of us are becoming rather…paranoid."

"I was just…walking around the island…" Long responded, looking confused. "_Why_ is everyone feeling paranoid…?"

"The villains are AWOL!" Aaron announced, gesturing towards the empty table on the opposite side of the room. "And Chef is gone as well. We've all got a feeling that this is the lead-in for a _super mysterious challenge_. Intense, huh?"

"Very," Long agreed, and he walked over to the sit on the bench. "If we don't know what we're doing for now, though…can we have some breakfast?"

"_Thank_ you!" Riley exclaimed, slapping her palms on the table.

Kit-Kat shrugged, and walked over to Chef's kitchen. Not a second later, she walked out, carrying platters of danish, cinnamon rolls, and donuts. The heroes whooped, not bothering to question how on Earth she managed to do that.

The food was distributed and the heroes sat down to eat it. Just as they were about to dig in, Chris walked through the front doors, ordering the heroes to drop their food at once.

"Oh _come on_!" An irate Riley cried, a chocolate éclair halfway to her mouth.

"Trust me," Chris assured her. He was sporting an evil grin, and the campers had enough sense to know that it didn't mean anything good. "You're gonna want to be as hungry as you can for this challenge."

Mo crossed his arms. "Skip the 'mysterious' intro, and just tell us what the challenge is."

"And why we can't eat breakfast beforehand," Riley added.

"Fine," Chris conceded. He held up his index and middle finger. "Two reasons. First of all, hunger might make you run faster…"

"This is starting to sound creepy…" Jess commented. Chris glared at her, irked at the interruption, and Jess held her hands, defensively. "Just saying."

"Second," continued Chris. "This is an award challenge! The team that wins today will get a lovely dinner out at the finest Canadian restaurant that we want to pay for."

"Just to clarify…not what you _can_ pay for…" Seth noted, his tone heavy with sarcasm, "what you _want to_ pay for…"

"Great," Rosetta muttered. "Hope you guys like Taco Bell."

"Sheesh!" Chris complained. "You guys have worse attitudes than the villains!"

"Speaking of," Bren remarked, "where are they?"

"And _donde está__ Chef?" Glisa added._ "Part of da challenge, _yo sé_, but still…are we allowed to know about dat?"

"Well…you're not allowed to know their _exact_ location," Chris informed the heroes. "But I suppose it'd be _nice of me_ to tell you what they're up to." The campers crossed their fingers, then, hoping that Chris wouldn't finish this with an addition like 'but if _that's_ the case, I better keep it to myself'!

Amazingly enough, Chris was feeling merciful today. He continued with his explanation.

"Alright, here is the _dealio_. The ten villains are in…a place."

"Not gonna get more specific?" Jess drawled.

"No, Jess, I am not," Chris replied, huffily. "The…_place_…will be the base for the villains this challenge. See, they've been assigned a task. And that task…is perfecting a skill necessary for _any_ self-respecting villain!"

Jess raised her hand. Chris, dreading what she might have to add now, sighed. "Yeah, Jess?"

"And would that task be…having a permanent five o'clock shadow? Because, man, _you_ have that _down_."

"No!" Chris responded, clearly annoyed, now. "Now shut up!"

"_Alright_, alright…" Jess leaned back and closed her mouth.

"So…" Aaron began. "What _is_ the skill? Is it twiddling a goatee? Because I am freaking _awesome_ at that, let me tell you. Well, I don't actually _have_ a goatee, but if I _did_…!"

Rosetta tried to hold back her laughter, but with limited success. "Y'know, Chris, this isn't gonna stop until you just tell us what we want to know."

"If it will keep you guys quiet," Chris lowered his eyebrows, "fine. The villains' goal is to catch all eleven of you before the gong rings at two o' clock sharp. If anyone from your team is still free by two, then your team wins. If you guys are all caught…then you're on the chopping block!"

"Wait, wait," Bren cut in. "So…are they basically just setting traps around the island?"

Chris nodded at that. "Anywhere on this land, my friend!"

"And…does it matter who they catch?" Seth questioned. "I mean, obviously they're trying to catch _us_—not like, themselves or you or Chef or Snoop Dogg or…yeah...but are certain villains assigned to certain heroes?"

"Nope!" Chris replied. "If a hero stumbles into a trap…then they're good!"

"That seems like quite a disadvantage for us," Mo noted, scowling disapprovingly.

"Ah, but you have to remember the people that are _on_ the villains team," Chris reminded them, with a wide grin. "They're…ah…"

"A few feathers short of a goose," Seth suggested.

"They're scuba diving in the Sahara," Damion pitched in.

"Junior year will be the best five years of their lives," Bren added.

"_Sus madres son hámsteres y sus padres olía a bayas de saúco!"_ Glisa grumbled. **(1)**

"What was that last one?" Kit-Kat questioned Long. Long took out his Spanish-to-English dictionary, but he looked rather confused as he began flipping through it.

"Just give me a second…" he told Kit-Kat, frowning deeply as he scoured through the pages, even though he had _no_ idea how to spell anything that Glisa had just said.

Much to Chris's impatience and chagrin, the insult exchanging between the heroes continued, with some really, really poor attempts ("they…are stupid…and stuff!") and, unfortunately, some shameless puns ("they're like an empty piggy bank…they have no _cents_!")

"If the villains were donuts they'd be French crullers…because French crullers suck…" Riley grumbled. She was still staring glumly at her untouched éclair.

"What now?" Seth questioned Riley, both confused and slightly amused.

"I don't _know_!" Riley groaned, fisting her eyes. "_I just want my damn donut_!"

"Anyways!" Chris continued, rubbing his temples. "The villains are allowed to try anything they want when it comes to trapping you guys."

"Um…they're staying in the _legal_ territory, right?" Kit-Kat asked, cautiously.

"Actually," Chris admitted. "Yes." The heroes sighed in relief. "There'll be no bear traps or falling spikes or anything involving rabid squirrels. That much I can assure you of.

"Oh, wait! One more thing. Let's say you get caught. If you can get out of the trap yourself, then consider yourself free. But you're not allowed to get your fellow heroes to help you out. Unless they are trapped _with_ you. Any questions?"

"How long do the villains have, again?" Mo asked.

"Till two o'clock," Chris responded.

"And what time is it now?" Aaron questioned.

"As of now…it's 9:17."

"So…we've got…" Rosetta paused for a moment. "Four hours, forty-three minutes, to not get trapped. That's…quite a while."

"Indeed it is!" Chris agreed, grinning maniacally once again. "Let your day of paranoia…begin."

()()()()()()()()()()

**About an hour-or-so before that:**

Zane's vision blurred into focus, and his mind quickly shifted to alarm when he realized he didn't recognize his surroundings. He bolted upwards, whipping his head around, but slumped his shoulders in relief when he saw his fellow ten villains were with him.

"Just a challenge…" he mumbled to himself. He rubbed his eyes. "But what idiocy are we up to now, I wonder…"

The ten villains were sleeping on a carpeted floor, in a very empty room. The walls were white and barren, and the fluorescent lighting only added to the room's level of creepiness. In the opposite end of the room a door was open, exposing a long hallway. It was too dark to really make out anything in that direction.

All the other villains were asleep, still. Zane stood up, but sat back down fearfully when Chef strode into the room. Chef held a finger to his lips, signaling Zane to be quiet. There was a large megaphone in Chef's hands.

Zane sighed, but complied, and plugged his ears, squeezing his eyes shut once Chef began.

"RISE AND SHINE, MAGGOTS!" Chef shouted. Immediately, the villains screamed and jumped upwards, all in surprising sync.

"An eyeful of Chef is not how I like to start my day…" Riley F. groaned, propping himself up on an elbow.

"What the hell is going on?" Chelsea demanded.

"Where are we…?" Jack wondered, looking from side to side.

"And who designed this place?" Sienna questioned, scowling at the fuchsia-colored carpeting.

"Priorities first," Lacey mumbled, one hand clutching her head. "What're we doing here, Chef?"

Chef set the megaphone down on the ground, and stared down the ten villains. "Y'all are getting prepped for the fourth challenge. If you win, you get a meal. At a restaurant."

The villains bolted up, instantly intrigued.

"Good," Chef noted, with a grin. "I've got your attention."

"C'mon," urged Lola. "Spit it out. What do we have to do to win today?"

Chef glared at her. "Keep up the back-talk, and you'll be in the losers circle for weeks, girly!" Lola rolled her eyes, but kept her mouth shut. "The challenge today is to catch the other eleven heroes."

"'Catch'?" Zane reiterated. "Can you elaborate?"

"You need to _trap_ the heroes. Set traps around the island, try to catch the heroes. If you can trap all of them by five o'clock, you guys win invincibility. If a hero remains free…then tough luck, and you'll be sending one of your own home."

"And we can do _anything_ to catch them…?" Arlen questioned, raising an eyebrow, and grinning.

"Anything that doesn't maim or kill is A-OK! Now then! Past the hallway, there is a supply room. You'll find some handy materials in there. Farther past the corridor, there's a staircase that leads to a trapdoor in my kitchen." Chef's expression suddenly became very, very angry. "But if you touch a _single thing in that kitchen_, I will _END YOU_."

The villains gulped; they didn't doubt a word he said.

"Exit the kitchen as soon as you are up there," Chef continued to grumble. "Be discreet. Sneak around; try not to let the heroes see you. You can return down here any time you want to. That's all the advice I have, in any rate."

"So what is this place, again?" Logan questioned.

"That's none of your damn business, boy!" Chef barked. He picked up his megaphone again, and the villains frantically ran out of the room, towards the supply closet. "MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!"

()()()()()()()()()()

"I have to wonder why Chef even has all this stuff, to begin with," Lacey remarked, propping up a remarkably large butterfly net. It could easily fit over someone's entire body. "I'm afraid to ask what he did before he was on this show…"

The villains were all stuffed into a dimly lit closet. Much to their elation, though, it was stocked with a lot of handy supplies.

"Ooh! Dibs on the net!" Arlen exclaimed. He grabbed the net out of Lacey's hands and disappeared out the door, and up the stairs.

"I didn't…" Lacey scowled. "Oh, forget it."

Elsewhere, Jack and Logan were surveying a large metal cage. It was far from inconspicuous, but it was hard to escape from.

"We'd have to herd them in," Jack observed. "Trap them so that they end up running straight in here. Slam the door, take the key…then we're good to go."

"Excellent," Logan grunted. Irritated, he grasped the bars of the cage, and pulled with muster. It budged about five inches. "Now we just have to _move_ the damn thing."

Riley F. knelt down, searching through a whole box of rope for a thin, brown-green camouflage variant. He pulled out about ten feet of it, cut it, stuffed it into his pocket, and dashed out.

Zane, looking hesitant, walked around the room, glancing around. Abruptly, Zarya shoved him aside—so hard that Zane fell over. Without another word Zarya continued on her way, dragging a shovel with her and a bottle of…something.

Chelsea sighed, and extended a hand for Zane to take. Zane grasped it and struggled to his feet.

"You okay?" Chelsea questioned.

Zane nodded weakly. "Yeah. I'm a little concerned she's just gonna hit somebody over the head with that shovel, though."

"I wouldn't be surprised," Chelsea agreed, dryly. She began to walk away, but looked over her shoulder. "I didn't show that video. Just so you know."

"Oh." Zane nodded again. "Okay."

**(Confession Cam: Thirteen pages before we show up? We can take a hint.)**

** Zane—**"I do believe Chelsea. But still…that's one person down…and twenty-one left, if you count the ex-campers. But then there's Chris and Chef. And the pirates. And the chainsaw wielding psycho with a hook. Hell…it could even be the bear." _(Again, he buries his head in his hands.) _"I hate this show."

()()()()()()()()

"Already got something planned?" Sienna asked Lacey. Lacey was empty-handed, but it was easy to tell she had something concocted.

"Of course," Lacey replied, grinning triumphantly. "Wanna join in on the fun?"

Sienna shook her head. "Tempting, but I've got my own stunt to try out." Suddenly, she snapped her fingers. "Logan!" Logan, who was still struggling with Jack to drag the cage out, immediately turned around. Jack rolled his eyes. "Can you help me out with something?"

Logan smirked as he walked over. "Depends, sweetheart. What's in it for me?"

Sienna gave Logan a coquettish look. "You could stick around and find out."

Logan raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

Sienna sighed. "You get to show off your strength, if that will smoothen the deal."

With a shrug, Logan replied, "Works for me. Hey, Jack!"

"I know, I know," Jack grumbled. "Hurry back from your make-out session to help me with this damn cage, got it?" Grinning mischievously, Logan gestured for Sienna to lead the way. She did so—carrying in her hands a hammer, a nail, and some strong-looking twine. Lacey walked out as well, with a quick, cursory glance towards the barren room that Chef was still in. She dashed up the stairs.

The only three left in the room were Zane, Lola, and Chelsea. They pretty much stayed on opposite corners of the supply room, trying to avoid each other as best as possible. Zane searched around until he found two large nets, and a few wires. Awkwardly dragging the huge load, he ambled out of the doorway.

Flustered, Lola struggled to devise a way to trap someone. She sighed, glancing towards Chelsea. "Look, I doubt we like each other, but we need to work with each other to win this challenge. If you have any ideas, tell me, and I'll help you set it out. I mean, it's a reasonable deal, isn't it?"

"Surprisingly enough," Chelsea agreed, with a low chuckle. "That is pretty damn reasonable. All right. I do need some help with my idea. Grab some rope." She pointed to the aforementioned object, and Lola swiped it up. "Good. Now, we need to pay a quick visit to the heroines' cabin…and then we'll be good to go."

"Ooh, stealing, are we?" Lola questioned, with a wide grin. Chelsea nodded. "I love it. Let's do this."

()()()()()()()()

"Let's see…" Lacey whispered, rummaging through the cupboards of Chef's kitchen. "Peanut butter, syrup, jelly…I might as well take 'em all."

She began to stuff a variety of sticky foods in to a burlap sack.

"How does he have all this good food and still cook us absolute crap?" She muttered to herself. "Alright…molasses…those will be good. And…" her eyes widened. "Holy crap, he actually has Pop-Tarts." She glanced over her shoulder. Seeing no one, she threw the box in her sack as well.

"Hannah Montana gummies…?" She read the label of one box out loud, and soon after put it down, looking disgusted.

**(Confession Cam: We're just being used out of guilt; we know it!)**

** Lacey—**_(Smirks.) _"I would've picked up those gummies to use in my trap…but Chef said we couldn't cause _too_ much harm to the contestants."

()()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, guys," Jess announced, smacking her fist against her open palm, "we need a plan. So…feel free to pitch some ideas." All eleven heroes were gathered outside the mess hall. Everyone seemed worried to some extent; they weren't thrilled that they'd be spending hours upon hours in absolute terror.

"Should we stay together or split apart?" Mo questioned.

"We definitely can't stay together," Rosetta declared. "If there's one good trap, and we're all together…then we won't even have a chance. If we stay apart that's one person per trap. We outnumber the villains, so if we're alone then _all_ of the villains' traps can work and we'd still have someone left over."

"But a single villain could make more than one trap," Kit-Kat pointed out. "I think we should be in groups of three or less. If we have another person with us, we can spot more, and then lessen the chance of getting caught."

"Well…" Damion was about to contribute, but stopped talking when he heard a strange noise. "What…is that…?" The heroes turned their heads to see Arlen coming around the mess hall, cackling like a madman.

"Is dat a gigantic butterfly net…?" Glisa questioned, tilting her head.

"Why yes…" Aaron agreed, dizzily. "Yes it is."

The heroes glanced at each other, briefly, and then scattered in different directions.

Arlen chased after them, screaming something about how they could 'never escape the wrath of the butterfly net'.

()()()()()()()()()

Logan and Sienna squatted underneath the staircase of the heroes' cabin, staying hidden underneath the shade.

"There's something we could do to pass the time…" Logan suggested, but Sienna elbowed him.

"Shush!" She urged. "I hear someone coming." The two fell into silence as the sound of footsteps pounded up the stairs. They listened for voices, and recognized Damion and Aaron's.

"I really freaking hate this challenge," Aaron ranted.

"Same here," Damion sighed. "But that's nothing new. I'm gonna be glad when the next four hours are up."

"What now?" Aaron questioned.

"C'mon," Sienna whispered, in a tone barely audible, "go in the cabin…"

"Now…" Damion shrugged. "According to Kit-Kat and Rosetta, we shouldn't try to rejoin any big group. So…we can either stay in one place or try to search around to find traps, and set them off—I mean, not with ourselves, but with other things."

"Most of them will probably be in the forest," Aaron remarked. "Do we have a map?"

"No, but we can Hansel-and-Gretel it."

Aaron raised an eyebrow, and looked confused. "Stumble across a candy house, get caught by a witch, and almost get cooked to death?"

"Not really my intentions, no," Damion replied, smiling sheepishly. "I meant, I could grab a magazine or some other paper, we can rip up shreds, and leave them in a trail."

"Okay, go ahead and grab it," Aaron agreed. Damion disappeared into the cabin, and Sienna cursed when she could hear Aaron humming—he was still outside.

"I don't suppose you'd have any objection to pushing Aaron in there, would ya?" Sienna questioned Logan. Logan smirked in silent reply, and quietly sneaked out to the front steps. In a few seconds he was up the stairs and with a quick shove, a surprised Aaron was in the cabin.

"Sienna!" Logan called out. Sienna ran up the stairs and ordered Logan to close the door. Logan did so, and pressed himself against it, pushing as Damion and Aaron fruitlessly tried to open the door.

As the two trapped heroes hurled an impressive variety of threats and curses, Sienna hammered a nail in the wall nearby. Logan watched her, curiously, as she tied the twine around the nail, and then tied a tight knot around the doorknob.

"Okay," she announced. "You can step back." Logan seemed unconvinced, but he did as Sienna said. Immediately, the door flung open—but only a few inches. The twine was too strong and the nail was too close to the door—they could only open it a little tiny bit. And it wasn't enough space for them to squeeze through.

Although, it was certainly enough room for Sienna and Logan to see Damion and Aaron's angry glares.

"You…" Aaron declared, pointing a finger at the two. "Actually, that was kind of ingenious."

"All my doing," Logan boasted, but Sienna shoved him aside.

"Thanks for the compliments," Sienna told them, with a grin. "And sorry, it's nothing personal, obviously."

"Perfectly understandable," Aaron agreed, grinning right back at her. "But, my dear lady, you've underestimated us."

"Oh really?" Sienna questioned, arms crossed.

"Yeah really!" Aaron exclaimed in response. "Watch as we…ram this door open! I would recommend stepping back, so you do not get hurt."

Sienna nodded in mock solemnity. "Got it." She stepped back a few feet. Aaron stepped back a few feet himself, did a quick battle cry, and then rammed into the door. Sienna could hear him fall over from inside.

Sienna peeked inside the crack of the door. "He conscious?" She asked Damion.

Damion sighed, examining the dizzy Aaron. "Pretty sure."

"Alright then," Sienna stepped back once again. "Oh, I wouldn't recommend trying to go out the window. You might not like what's on the bottom…" She gave them a wistful look, before walking away, Logan following after.

"What's on the bottom?" Logan questioned her.

"Absolutely nothing," Sienna replied, with a mild shrug. "I just wasn't sure how to stop them to go out the window. Good thing none of them open, anyways. Anyways, thanks for helping out, Logan."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Logan objected, wheeling in front of Sienna. "You said this would be worth my while."

"Huh, I did, didn't I?" Sienna mused. She sauntered forwards, putting her arms around Logan's neck. She leaned forwards, till she was only inches away from meeting his lips with hers.

"Tough luck," she whispered, smirking. She dropped her arms to her sides and smoothly walked away, leaving a shocked Logan in her wake.

**(Confession Cam: Admittedly, we have some self-confidence issues.)**

** Logan—**_(Chuckles.) _"She's good." _(Pauses a moment, and sighs.) _"_Damn_, she's good…"

()()()()()()()

Alone, Rosetta ambled near the edge of the forest, cautious to avoid anything that might come her way. She didn't dare venture very far into the forest, doing so would be idiotic. All the best traps would be hidden in there.

She didn't walk a step forward when something clamped around her ankle, pulled her up, and flung her upside down.

"Whoa!" She yelped, as she dangled helplessly from a tree branch. The rope around her ankle was pretty tight, she reached for it, in an attempt to detangle herself, but it was useless.

From behind a nearby tree, a head of orange hair poked out.

"Seriously?" Riley F. questioned, looking surprised. "I wasn't even aiming to catch you!"

"Well, fate has a dumb sense of humor," Rosetta grumbled, still swiping at her leg.

"Well…" Riley zipped over to Rosetta's side. "Sorry about that, really."

"Sorry enough to let me down?" Rosetta questioned hopefully.

"Not quite," Riley admitted. He plopped down at the ground. "C'mon, c'mon, ask how I did it."

"Are you seriously in that much need for an ego boost?" Rosetta questioned, laughing.

In an almost hyper fashion, Riley hopped up and down. "I spent like a whole _ten minutes_ on this; I should get to brag about it for twenty."

"Fine, fine," Rosetta conceded, still unable to wipe the grin off of her face. "Tell me, Riley Payton Fox, how you were able to pull off such an _amazing trap_."

Riley went over how the trap worked, a "spring snare". There were two small stubby sticks and a longer stick wedged underneath them. And, wedged underneath the third stick, was a tiny stick that had a knot tied around it. The rope continued into the noose that had ensnared Rosetta's ankle. One Rosetta stepped on the stick in the center of the noose, it had knocked off the smallest stick, pulling the rope up, tightening it, and flinging Rosetta upside down.

"Okay, okay, that was pretty cool," Rosetta admitted, grudgingly. Riley put his hands behind his head, grinning at the complement. "Just make sure to come back for me once the challenge is over. I'm beginning to feel like Spiderman."

"Got it," Riley agreed. He paused. "But that comparison is a little unnerving to me. I mean, if you're Spiderman, what does that make _me_?"

"The leading lady, I guess," Rosetta teased.

"Aw. If I'm Spiderman's girlfriend, I'll have to get almost-killed, like, five times a week."

"I can make it up to you," Rosetta promised, with a wink. "C'mon, won't you kiss me, Mary Jane?"

"Oh, if I must," Riley replied, innocently. He stood up—his head meeting Rosetta's upside down head—and pressed his lips to hers.

()()()()()()()()()

Zarya gently laid down the last stick over her pit, and then took to picking up armfuls of leaves and depositing them over the sticks. It was the classic pitfall trap, and once anyone stepped over the leaves, they'd fall a good seven feet. She had greased the walls to make it nearly impossible to climb out.

From a ways off, she could hear Riley S., Seth, and Bren, talking to each other.

"So hungry…" Riley S. groaned. "I wanted that donut."

"Well, whether we win or lose, we'll be able to eat as soon as this challenge ends!" Seth promised her. "Err…I think. I'd _hope_ they wouldn't withhold food from us for a whole _day_."

"If it's Chef food, _I_ would," Bren grumbled.

Zarya raised an eyebrow. She turned her head; she was right behind the mess hall. With a quick shrug to herself, she ran inside the mess hall, and grabbed a plateful of the pastries that Kit-Kat had brought out for the heroes earlier that morning. She ran back out and gently set the plate of donuts over her trap, and then hid behind a nearby tree.

The three alliance members came into view.

"Seth!" Riley S. exclaimed, shaking the aforementioned karate kid by the shoulder. "Donuts! Over there! Twelve o'clock!"

Bren glanced at his watch, confused.

"Ah, I see it!" Seth groaned, gently pushing Riley's hand away from his shoulder. "But there's almost certainly a trap around it. We better just turn around."

"B-b-but…" Riley S. stammered. "Donuts…"

"I know, I know," Seth comforted her, dragging the gamer away. Bren followed.

"Damn," Zarya muttered to herself. She began to back away towards the villains' base, and started to go over new ideas for capturing the heroes. "Okay, so they're not on an 'Arlen' level of idiocy."

()()()()()()()()()()

"ARLEN, I'M ON YOUR TEAM!" Lacey screamed, as Arlen chased her with his butterfly net, still cackling insanely.

()()()()()()()()()()

"We don't need to worry about, like, getting caught in another villains' trap…right?" Lola questioned, as she and Chelsea ambled up to the heroines' cabin.

"If we do, I'm sure the other villains are allowed to let us go," Chelsea responded. Lola shrugged at this, and the two snuck into the open door of the heroines' cabin.

"So, what are we nabbing?" Lola questioned. Chelsea didn't answer at first. She scoured through the girls' things, opening and closing cupboards, and finally searching through a large suitcase in Jess's possession. Buried beneath piles of shirts and jeans were a few colorful cans of silly string.

"Seriously?" Lola scoffed, putting a hand on her hip. "What use is _that_ going to be for us?"

Chelsea tossed her two of the four cans. "What use _wouldn't_ it hold for us?" She asked in rebuttal. "Sheesh, what a stupid question."

Lola rolled her eyes.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Logan wiped his hands on his jeans, grinning at his partner. The cage, with a large amount of difficulty, had been dragged out and left a fairly good distance away from the mess hall. "Alright! So…err…what do we do now?"

"Now? Now we get someone to run into here and trap 'em," Jack replied. "Hm…we could scare them in, or like I said earlier, just sort of…herd them in. How we're going to do that…I can't be certain."

"Can't we just like…tackle them down and throw them in?"

Jack raised an eyebrow, and smirked. "Well, I certainly condone playing dirty. Go for it, _compadre_."

"Excellent," Logan chuckled. He peered around. "Hey, there's a hero!" He dashed off before Jack had the chance to say anything. Not long after, he was dragging Glisa by the collar, as she swore up a Spanish storm. Logan threw her in the cage, and Jack slammed the door shut.

"This is _un atropello_!" Glisa declared, grabbing the bars of the cage and glaring at the boys. "I demand to see a lawyer!"

"You're not being arrested," Jack pointed out, half-heartedly.

"Then…then…I demand to be allowed to punch you in the face!"

"Demand denied!" Logan declared. "This is what you get for messing with…_us_."

"I was not messing with you!" Glisa responded, frowning. "I was walking!"

"Well, when you walk…" Logan began dramatically, "you mess with us."

"Dude," Jack said, disapprovingly. "Does that even make sense?"

"Oh, why do you care?" Logan grumbled. "We caught her, didn't we?"

The two continued to argue, and Glisa noticed that the key was actually still in the lock. Trying to be sneaky, she slowly reached her hand towards it.

"Besides, we already have the 'stupid' slot filled, I don't think Arlen would appreciate the competition—oh, _nice try_, Glisa," Jack snickered, as he quickly took the lock out of the door. "You almost had us there." Glisa crossed her arms, and sighed, forlornly.

"Oh, come on," Jack urged. "We'll let you out as soon as the challenge is over, alright?"

Glisa grumbled under her breath, but nodded.

"Good!" Jack stepped back, pleased. "Then I guess we better…" his sentence died off as he saw Lacey stumble in the distance. She dropped the burlap sack she had been carrying, and a variety of objects spilled out. Arlen ran past her, looking unusually cheerful, and Lacey flipped him off from behind.

"Hey Arlen…" Jack and Logan greeted in unison.

"HEY GUYS!" Arlen whooped in reply as he ran past the two of them.

"Be right back," Jack told Logan, and he ambled towards Lacey. The irritated nonconformist was stuffing her spilt items back into her sack, and swearing even more than Glisa.

"Aw, come on now, it's a kid show," Jack reminded her. Lacey, ignoring him, continued cursing. Jack squatted down and started helping her pick up the items she had dropped. He examined them, and realized that all of them were food. "Wow. Did you take these from Chef's kitchen?"

"Oh, he won't miss them," Lacey retorted. "Besides, this trap will work…if I find time to set it up after I hunt Arlen down and…" she clenched her fists. "Dang it, I'm so angry I can't think of a creative threat."

"So what do you plan to do, exactly with…peanut butter, laffy taffy, and all this other crap? I don't suppose Chef decided to give you a cooking lesson."

"Not quite," Lacey smirked. "Look, I've got all I need, so you can go now. Thanks for helping me."

"We're on the same team," Jack reminded her.

Lacey stood up, flinging the bulging sack over her shoulder. "So?"

"So…you might as well tell me, Santa Claus. You don't have anything to hide, really."

"Fine." Lacey shrugged. "Whatever floats your boat. I can't see why you care so much, though."

"I'm a curious person," Jack suggested, shrugging.

"Well…I was thinking if I could get a hero in the confession cam, I could smear some of this stuff over the side of the door. Stick it shut, so the hero couldn't get out."

"Thank God nobody actually uses the confession cam for an outhouse. But why all this stuff and not, well, the more obvious choice—glue?" Jack asked her.

"Believe it or not, with all that crap in Chef's closet…I couldn't find a single bottle of glue. Still, this is a bit more fun," Lacey explained, lightly. "I mean, I got to steal from Chef, didn't I?"

"Very true," Jack agreed. "Good luck. With the trap, _and_ with not getting caught by Chef."

Lacey nodded. "Thanks again." She gave Jack a strange look. "By the way…you might want to watch out for Logan."

Jack looked puzzled. "What? Why?"

Lacey opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a loud noises nearby.

"HA!" Chelsea screamed, popping up from the bushes, and aiming two silly string cans at the two of them. Jack and Lacey yelped. Chelsea, once she saw who it was, lowered the silly string. "Oh, never mind, it's just you guys." She turned around, and Lola, who wasn't far away from Chelsea, chuckled and followed. "Carry on!"

Lacey rolled her eyes, and began to walk towards the confession cam. "I've got to go. See you later, Jack."

"Bye," Jack replied, tentatively. He looked back at Logan, and then back to Lacey. "I guess…"

()()()()()()()()()()

Zane muttered angrily to himself, fidgeting with the long pieces of thin rope and the large, tangled net that sat on the ground. As time went on he seemed to get only more and more frustrated. Eventually, in his annoyance, he threw the rope he had been tampering with—it wasn't as impressive as he would hope, the rope only flew about half a foot.

"You okay there…?" a voice questioned, a good distance behind him. Zane could hear the slight smile in the tone; it was obvious that the onlooker was a bit amused by his struggles. Zane turned his head, behind him was Long.

"I'm fine," Zane said icily.

"Err…you _could_…ask some other villains for help. It seems Riley had set up a pretty impressive trap, Rosetta's still hanging upside-down…"

Zane didn't answer; rather, he just rolled his eyes, and turned his head back towards his work. Long, a bit curious to see where Zane's problems stemmed from, advanced further to see what was going on with the attempted trap.

Once Zane heard the _whoosh_ noise, he smirked.

He did a full one-eighty, and he saw that his second trap had been completely successful. Long was encased in a net, still wide-eyed with surprise.

"You built a net trap…hid the net under some leaves, grass, and sticks…then made it look like you were struggling to make _one_ net trap. That…is dedication," Long remarked, looking a tad impressed.

"Thanks," Zane replied, standing up. Humbleness be damned, he couldn't stop grinning.

"I suppose this sort-of your 'revenge' for the tubing challenge…" Long commented, mildly.

"Well, it wasn't intentional that you were gonna be the one caught. I'm a little amused by how things turned out, but that's completely irrelevant."

Long gave him a speculative look through the holes of the net. "You do realize now, that this is almost confirming a start of a rivalry…"

"So be it." Zane shrugged. "I could use all the distraction I can get…"

"Oh. I'm sorry about that video, by the way. I wasn't the one to put it up there, but I feel terrible that someone got away with doing that…"

"Well, um…okay." It wasn't the most concise of answers, but Zane wasn't sure what to say to him. He gave Long a half-hearted wave, and began to walk away from the scene, towards the confession cam to exploit his feelings on the event.

()()()()()()()()()()

Zane approached the confession cam, but Lacey jumped out from behind it.

"BOO!" She shouted, waving her arms at the oncoming loner.

Confused, Zane slowly backed away.

()()()()()()()()()

Riley S. pushed the double-doors of the mess hall open, just a bit. She poked her head in, and looked left and right, to make sure the coast was clear. She moved towards the table, rubbing her hands together, and sat down on the bench, grabbing one of the donuts left on there and taking a bite into it.

Her left arm fell down to her side, and for a second, Riley felt a small tug on it, and then a _click. _Shocked, she tried yanking her hand up, but it was stuck. She lowered her head to see that her left hand had been handcuffed to a metal beam that supported the bench.

Zarya, who had been squatting underneath there, eased herself out.

"Sorry," she said simply, but Riley S. grinned at her.

"Hey, no problem! If I'm gonna be trapped, it might as well be here." Zarya, saying nothing more on the matter, retreated back into the kitchen. Riley S. happily munched on her donut.

A few seconds later, Seth and Bren burst through the doors.

"Riley!" Seth exclaimed. "Oh, phew, we thought you were…" Riley lifted her handcuffed hand to wave at them, and Seth's face fell. "Caught."

Riley grinned, apologetically. "Sorry about that. You guys might as well head out, before another villain sneaks into here." Bren and Seth exchanged glances.

"I guess," Bren agreed. "You'll be okay, I presume?"

She gave the boys a dramatic sigh. "I'll survive. See you guys later."

The boys ran out.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Jess let out a huge sigh as she fell to a sitting position. She had remained undetected for quite some time; in fact, she hadn't even seen another hero since the initial split-up. Still, she was tired and hot and far too paranoid to try to go into her cabin or the mess hall.

"_Here's an announcement for the heroes!" _ Chris began, and Jess looked up sharply. "_The current time is…12:46. And…there're only five of you left—Kit-Kat, Seth, Mo, Jess, and Bren."_

Jess widened her eyes. They were dropping like flies.

_"Good luck surviving the next hour and fourteen—wait, no, now it's thirteen—minutes!" _There was a brief burst of static, and then the noise of the intercom fell short.

"Damn it," Jess muttered to herself. "I could've sworn it's been longer than that."

She wondered if she should try to find another hero, and decided that if she did see someone she would join up with them. Reluctantly, she moved to her feet, and began cautiously moving around the camp.

**(Confession Cam: Is chuckling to itself.)**

** Jess—**"I'm beginning to think the villains are smarter than we thought. Sheesh, it's like they heard us making fun of them earlier today. I'm not sure what to do, to be honest. I guess I'll just have to keep my head down and not do anything stupid." _(She reaches for the door. It doesn't budge.) _"What the…?" (_She slams on the door, but it doesn't move.) _"Oh, this is just too rich. Really freaking funny." (_She continually hits her fists against the door.) _"Damn it, let me out of here!"

()()()()()()()()()

_"Heh…Jess is out!" _Chris announced, via intercom. _"Only four heroes left!"_

Mo sighed. "No pressure, then."

Much to his own major relief, he had survived a walk through the forest. He was now in the large, open area that the campers had played 'capture the flag' in for the first challenge. It was a good tactic, he reasoned. In a place that wide and barren, it'd be impossible to hide a good trap.

He sat down on the ground, thinking to himself. It was a good of a time as any to ponder about what to do with his three conniving teammates…

_And, _he thought, with the slightest bit of a smirk, _the right time to be a little conniving, myself. I've got to think of the right time to approach him…_

"You!" A voice barked, from a ways away. Surprised, and a bit worried, Mo stood up to face the newcomer. It was Chelsea, who looked a bit winded.

"Ran…all over the forest…" she began. She leaned on her knees, gasping for breath. "Hoo boy…just, give me a second…"

"Damn it Chelsea!" Lola's voice cried out from the trees. The blonde emerged from the foliage, red-faced and just as tired as her pyromaniac partner. "I told you…to _wait_…you idiot…!"

Mo, being the gentleman he was, asked, awkwardly, "Um…you guys okay?" Chelsea cackled, swaying to her feet.

"We are!" She declared. "Now that we've found you!"

"That sounds…really flattering…" Mo said, slowly, as he began to back away. "But I should probably head out, now…"

"Oh no you don't!" Lola growled. "I've been running around with this crazy for the past hour and a half, trying to catch some damn hero! You're—going—_nowhere_!"

Mo gulped, as the girls began advancing towards him.

The last thing he remembered was tackling, shouting, some rope, and some silly string.

Lots and lots of silly string.

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay!" Riley F. exclaimed, clapping his hands together. "I'm glad we could all recoup for a quick meeting."

The ten villains were all gathered in the underground base, each of them anxious for the win.

"Last time I heard, there were five heroes," Jack noted. "I've been down here for a while, though. Have we gotten any more?"

"Thankfully, we finally caught a hero," Lola remarked.

"Mo," Chelsea elaborated. She grinned. "Silly string can really way someone down when they're trying to run away."

"Creepy," Lacey commented, "but good for you. I've got Jess taken care of."

**(Confession Cam: Stop hitting us, Jess!)**

** Jess—**_(A little ballistic, she's still thumping her fist against the confession cam wall) _"I WILL MURDER YOU ALL."

()()()()()()()()()()()

"So we've got Kit-Kat, Seth, and Bren left to capture," Arlen mused, ticking down the list. He still held on tightly to his giant butterfly net. "That shouldn't be too hard…right?"

"Kit-Kat is a patient person," Lacey commented, shaking her head. "She could probably stay in one place for a long time."

"Well, Karate Kid and Mr. Aversive-to-Scissors should be a bit easier to find," said Lola, crossing her arms. "The two geeks are probably wandering the island together. We should take them out and then focus on Kit-Kat."

"Well, what should we do?" Logan asked, impatiently.

"Leave it to me," Riley F. responded, chuckling. "The heroes all seem to be wandering the same place—near the edge of the forest—so I have an idea of where to set the trap. All I need are a few supplies…" he jumped up before the villains could say anything, and took a beeline straight for the supply closet.

"Well, alright-y then," Sienna said dryly. "Um…anybody want to play Go Fish?"

()()()()()()()()()

About thirty minutes following the villains meeting, Seth and Bren were still sneaking around the camp.

"Time?" Seth questioned, glancing at Bren.

"It is…1:22. It's been quite a while since Mo has been captured. It seems that between you, me, and Kit-Kat…we're just hard to catch."

"Awesome!" Seth grinned. "Thirty-eight minutes to kill. We totally got this…"

And, with a flair of not-so dramatic irony, the two teammates fell down a pit planted, and hidden, by Riley Fox. The pit itself was deep, though, much deeper than Zarya's pit had been. Seth's shirt snagged on a stick that was poking out from one side, and he stopped falling. Once he untangled his shirt, his resulting fall was only about five feet. However, Bren fell all the way, and once Seth landed, he saw Bren sitting around the ground, rocking back and forth and gritting his teeth in pain.

"Holy cow…" Seth mumbled, crawling over to Bren. "Dude, are you okay?" Bren, squeezing his eyes shut, shook his head 'no'. "What happened?"

"I landed on my foot, really awkwardly, and I think…I think I twisted my ankle…really badly," Bren managed to say. He attempted to put his foot down and stand up, but immediately he yelped, and grimaced. "Yup, that is one _twisted_ ankle."

"Oh crap…" Seth muttered. "Alright, um…immobilization is good, right? Just try to…not move…at all." Nervous, Seth glanced up, and widened his eyes at how deep the pit really was. "Err…let's just hope we can get back out again, eventually…"

"What was that?" Bren questioned weakly.

"Nothing!" Seth said quickly.

()()()()()()()()

_"Seth and Bren have been caught…" _Chris announced, dramatically. _"Kit-Kat is the only survivor of the heroes."_

"Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap…" Kit-Kat groaned, wringing her hands, nervously. "I've got ten villains all going after me, this sucks, this sucks, this _sucks_…" She paced back-and-forth, nervously, and with a forlorn sigh, turned her head to gaze towards the distance.

Suddenly, she raised an eyebrow, and smiled, just a little bit. "Why didn't I think of that before…?"

()()()()()()()()()()

The villains were a scrambled mess. The ten of them had traveled the island tree times over, but there had been no sign of Kit-Kat. In the cabins, the mess hall, the bears den, hiding behind Chef—she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

By 1:58, things started to get hysterical.

By 1:59, Logan had punched holes in several different walls, and even Zarya was a bit worried.

And by 2:00…Chris was laughing hysterically, over the intercom. He instructed the campers to go out to the Dock of Shame. They did so, and in the horizon, a little canoe bobbed along in the water. Kit-Kat poked her head up from it and waved to the villains.

"That's not against the rules?" Lola objected.

"Are there ever any rules?" Chris retorted, as he walked up to the villains.

"Looks like you guys are gonna have one of your own eliminated!" Chris sang. "_Again_!"

All the while, the ten villains fought the urge to cause him bodily harm.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Later that night, both the heroes and the villains sat themselves down for Chef's dinner. (Chris had claimed that the reward was a joke…but after nearly getting bludgeoned with a toilet seat, courtesy of Jess, he took it back and said that they'd be going out for breakfast the next day.) The villains nervously glanced at each other, knowing that it'd be, for one of them, the last time they were in there. Elimination was going to be right after dinner, so it was a double-whammy to end the horrible day.

Bren limped into the mess hall, his arm around Seth's shoulder, who was helping him get there. The other campers, who were not aware of the injury, widened their eyes in surprise.

"What happened?" Kit-Kat questioned.

Bren awkwardly averted the question, hoping to not get Riley in trouble, but Seth wasn't feeling quite as gracious to the villain.

"Riley's fault," Seth explained, through gritted teeth. "The pit he dug was a lot deeper than necessary…Bren hurt his ankle."

"Well, good thing I didn't go with the bear trap," Riley F. said, mildly.

"Are you kidding me, Riley?"

To the others' surprise, it was Rosetta who snarled this at her boyfriend. She stood up, and turned around, facing Riley with a hateful glare. "Your stupid trap hurt Bren and you're gonna treat it like it's a damn joke?"

Riley raised an eyebrow in his girlfriend. "I didn't _know_ he was going to get hurt."

Rosetta looked back at Seth. "How deep was that hole, Seth?"

Seth thought about it for a moment. "About twelve feet." Rosetta looked back at Riley, her fists clenched at her sides.

"You're not stupid, Riley. You know a fall like that would hurt somebody."

Lola innocently looked away from the two of them.

**(Confession Cam: A sticky situation)**

** Lola—**"Alright, alright, so Riley and I were planning to, ah, sabotage either Riley S., or Seth. Nothing serious, really, just a little…_incapacitation_. It only backfired a little bit, seeing as Bren wasn't our target. And now it seems Riley and Rosetta's relationship is becoming a little tiny bit strained…but that's not too much concern to _me_."

()()()()()()()()()()()

"You're awful!" Rosetta shouted at Riley. "I know you're a villain, but I didn't think you'd stoop this low!"

"Rosetta, look at what show this is!" Riley snapped, standing up and walking towards his girlfriend, meeting her in the space between the two benches. "People get attacked by bears. Crocodiles. They fall off of cliffs. They get shocked, hit, bludgeoned, burned, and publicly humiliated on a _daily basis_."

"But how often do you see contestants actually trying to hurt each other?" Rosetta shot back.

"Whenever the challenge calls for it, how about?"

"You're such a narcissistic brat!" Rosetta hissed. "I thought you were above this show, above the petty competition and the backstabbing and the alliances. I guess I was wrong. So why Bren? What, were you working with Lacey on this one?"

"Whoa, now," Lacey said, cautiously, "I have no part in this. Leave me out of it."

Rosetta shook her head at Riley, her eyes reddening and tearing up.

"Rosetta…" Riley said softly. He reached a hand out to put on her shoulder, but Rosetta backed up, shaking her head.

"Just…" she got out. "Just leave me alone. Please."

She ran out before Riley could say anything else.

Chris and Chef walked in the mess hall not long after. They seemed confused at the scene. Riley was standing in the middle of the room, wide-eyed, the majority of the heroes were hiding underneath the table, and the villains were awkwardly looking away or twiddling their thumbs.

"I take it we missed something…" Chris commented.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The ten villains sat on the campfire stumps, unexcited for the upcoming ceremony. Chris strode in with the marshmallow platter, and appraised the villains with a raised eyebrow.

"Well…that was an interesting day. I'm gonna go ahead and just…give you these marshmallows. Alright then…

"Logan. Arlen. Sienna. Chelsea. Jack. Lola. Zane. Zarya.

"The last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Lacey."

The nonconformist grabbed her marshmallow midair, and walked over to the group of safe villains, an apathetic expression on her face.

"Fine by me," Riley F. snarled. He stood up and went to the Dock of Shame without another word.

"Anybody want to see what I caught with my net?" Arlen asked the villains. They just rolled their eyes and dispersed. Arlen frowned and peered into the gigantic net, apologetically. "Sorry little buddy."

The Sasquathanakwa held up a thumb up.

()()()()()()()()()()

Logan crossed his arms, feeling irritated at Sienna's slight rejection earlier that day. He muttered to himself as he walked back to the villains' cabin, but was stopped by a small tap on the shoulder.

He turned around, first looking annoyed, but then he raised an eyebrow and grinned. "Well, hello there."

Monique smiled. "Hello, Logan. I don't suppose you know me—I'm an intern, here. But I have quite a deal for you…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: Scheming devils never make it through!)**

** Riley F.—**_(Um…we can either give you the Cartoon Network version or not show this at all. But we hate Cartoon Network so…just…just screw it. We're signing off, here.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

**Who voted for whom?**

** Logan—**Lacey

**Zarya—**Riley

**Lacey—**Riley

**Lola—**Lacey

**Jack—**Riley

**Riley—**Riley

**Zane—**Riley

**Sienna—**Riley

**Chelsea—**Riley

**Arlen—**Riley

**Total**:

Riley—**eight** votes

Lacey—**two** votes

**Voted off list: **Laura, Demi, Isaac, Riley F.

**(A.N.) **…because Riley and Rosetta got one measly vote on the poll. Which actually amuses me quite a bit.

I hope I'm not making stuff too overly dramatic. Hm…

But, anyways! I hope you guys liked this chapter! I wanted it to be finished before I leaved Saturday; I'll be gone all week.

Anyways…I thank you for reading, and I thank you even more if you leave a review, I really appreciate 'em!

**(1) **Glisa's insult loosely translates to "Their mothers are hamsters and their fathers smell of elderberries!"

-Janey1097


	8. Spy Guys

**(A.N.) **So…hello! I had a very nice week away. I played in a Hearts tournament and didn't suck too terribly! In the three games we played, I played 1st, 4th, and then 2nd. I hope everybody is having a good summer.

Here's to a new chapter!

And, by the way, it's brought to you by: that guy from that movie with that thing.

Enjoy!

()()()()()()()()()

"Last time, on Total Drama Island…" Chris recapped. Things were fairly normal…except that Chris was donning a black fedora, a black button-up shirt, a bright red tie, and black dress pants.

"The villains learned a lesson in evilness when the challenge made them try and capture the heroes! Zane and Zarya's relationship continued to struggle—although Zane managed to knock two people off of the 'suspect' list. Lacey warned Jack that Logan is bad business…well _duh_, he's on the _villains'_ team…

"Riley F. and Lola continued plotting, and finally pulled off a stunt that left Bren with a twisted ankle. This broke Rosetta's heart, and the two of them grew hostile. Riley F. ended up getting voted off, since the villains weren't able to catch the elusive Kit-Kat, who was hiding in a canoe off in the lake…how did they not notice that, again?

"Anyways! Will Zane catch his saboteur? Will Rosetta cope without her annoying beau? Will Lola's part in Bren's injury be discovered? And why am I in this awesome getup? All of these will be answered…eventually, maybe not in this chapter. But, anyways! We'll have the _most_ dramatic campfire ceremony yet…here, on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains!"

()()()()()()()()()()

It was a fairly unpleasant day at Camp Wawanakwa. The sky was a light, gloomy gray, and throughout the afternoon it had been drizzling on and off. Discouraged, the majority of the campers stayed in their cabins.

"Well this sucks," Lacey muttered, as she closed the door to the villainesses' cabin shut. Outside, the rain had started to pick up considerably. "And we're supposed to have a challenge today, right?"

"Right," Sienna agreed, nodding. "I don't think Chris will let us take a rain check."

"Even for literal rain?" Lola complained. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised."

Chelsea wrinkled her nose. "This day is going to be awful," she declared, grimacing, as she plopped down on her bed and began wringing out her soaked hair. "I hate rain."

"Because you can't set anything on fire?" Lacey guessed. Chelsea smirked.

"I just hope the challenge isn't physical then, today," Sienna commented, as she searched through her belongings for something entertaining. "We'd be slipping and sliding everywhere."

"Getting muddy, getting cold and damp—can't we just let this challenge go and vote off Arlen?" Lola groaned.

"Sounds good to me," Chelsea muttered in agreement.

"I think we're overdue for a win," Lacey pointed out, as she crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. "Have some confidence, you guys; we're gonna kick some protagonist _ass_ this challenge."

"_There's_ the overconfident attitude we all need," commented Chelsea, with the slightest tinge of sarcasm.

Sienna held up the A-OK sign. "_Totally_ not gonna jinx us with that, Lacey."

Lacey rolled her eyes, but grinned at the girls. "Keep up the pessimism, then, that mindset always works out for the best." Lacey paused for a moment. "No offense, Zarya."

The Russian emerged from her sheets, her tangled hair a mess, and her eyes not looking up from her book. "None taken…"

Lola raised an eyebrow. "You sure you wanna stick around here, even?" The queen bee chuckled a bit. "If you wanna live up to the 'loner' archetype, I don't think we're the company you want to keep."

"Not with the rain outside…" Zarya replied, half-heartedly. She slunk back down into her bed, disappearing under the sheets. "Paper gets wet too easily…"

At this, Chelsea shrugged. "Understandable. In any case…" she was hoping to steer the conversation in a different direction, before it was brought to the dilemma of Zane and Zarya, "how's Rosetta been taking the single life?"

"Did they actually break up?" Sienna questioned. "I know Rosetta stormed off…but they didn't have anything official."

"When something like _that_ happens," Chelsea remarked, with a sigh, "I don't know if you need anything official." Chelsea glanced at Lacey. "That was true, what you said…right? You didn't have anything to do with what Riley did to Bren?"

Lacey shook her head, listlessly. "I already _said_ I had nothing to do with it." She sighed, blowing a strand of hair out of her face. "And I don't like it. As much as that dude pissed me off, that's not very fair to anyone."

"True…" Sienna mused. She sat down, her back to the wall, and began flipping through a magazine.

Chelsea peered through the window. "Huh."

Curious, Lacey turned towards Chelsea. "What is it?"

Chelsea tilted her head. "There's a tornado outside with a house swirling around it. I do believe a witch is also flying around it…"

"Weather's starting to get worse?" Sienna guessed, not bothering to look up from her magazine.

With a wicked grin, Chelsea turned away from the window. "Just a tad."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, alright, alright, I am _absolutamente _going to do it this time…" Glisa declared, rocking back and forth on her heels, with her hand on the doorknob.

"Come on, Glisa," Jess urged, with a quick eye roll. "You're not jumping into a suicide mission, here. We're just going to the mess hall."

"_Verdad,_" Glisa agreed. _"Pero…_it's raining _gatos y perros…y pollos y elefantes…"_

"Okay, I didn't understand 80% of what you just said," Jess told her, dryly, "but it's just water! Come on, it's time for lunch."

"I'm in no hurry," Riley chuckled, dryly. "Take your time, Glisa. It's not like we're missing anything _good_ to eat."

**(Confession Cam: We're cold and wet. Not a fun day.) **

**Riley**—"Alright, alright, as bad as this sounds, I'm feeling pretty good. Heck, the 'initial' thing is gone, at least. Finally, I'm just Riley again!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Maybe if we all just stay in our cabins and barricade our doors we won't have to do the challenge today," Kit-Kat suggested, with a light laugh. "I'm not to thrilled about doing a challenge when it's pouring outside…I wonder if Chris will make the challenge revolve around this weather, then…"

"Good God," Jess groaned, shaking her head vehemently, "I hope not. If Chris makes the challenge involve the rain, we'll all be running around in an open field wearing metal armor."

"I used to think that all of the challenges were pre-planned," Riley commented. "But knowing Chris, I wouldn't doubt that the challenges can change in a snap."

"Still…" Kit-Kat grimaced. She hesitated, and rubbed the back of her neck. "How uncaring could Chris _get_, though?"

"Pretty damn uncaring," Jess laughed. "Say there's a tornado warning…" she began. She mimicked Chris's voice, "Guess what—you're all storm chasers! Congratulations!"

Glisa thumped her head against the wall, exasperated. "You are not making me feel any better!" Jess held her hands up, defensively. "Sorry," she apologized.

"Hey, where'd Rosetta go?" Kit-Kat asked, once she had noticed that the bunk above hers was empty.

"Huh...I'm not sure," Riley admitted. "She must've snuck out here early. Maybe she's hanging out with the guys, I'll go check…" she hopped off her bed, and walked over to the door. She politely pushed Glisa away from the doorway and walked out, putting an arm above herself to block the rain. She ran next door, to the heroes' cabin. She knocked the door and was let in after a few seconds.

"Oh, hey!" Seth, the one to let her in, greeted. "What's up?"

Riley smiled back at him. "Nothing much. But hey, have you guys seen Rosetta?"

"Not over here, no," Mo responded, temporarily taking his headphones off to listen to Riley. "I take it she's not over at your cabin…"

Riley shook her head. "No. She must've snuck out early." Nonchalantly, she sat down on the first bed she saw. "Ah well, I'm sure she's fine." She looked over the room, and couldn't help but smirk at the untidiness. "Uh…did you guys have a floor at any point?"

"Oh, we're making a game out of it," Seth responded, grinning at the gamer girl. "You have to see if you can get across the room without touching anything on the floor."

Riley kicked up a shirt from the floor. "Anybody win yet?" Bren laughed.

"Nobody's come even close." "How's your ankle doing?" Riley questioned him, concernedly. "It's pretty okay, now," Bren responded. To demonstrate, he stood up and took a few steps around the cabin. "It's still a little sore, and I have a little bit of a limp, but it's a lot better than it was."

"Good to hear," Riley told him. "Anyways, I think I'm gonna head to the—" A huge crash of lightning and thunder interrupted her, making the six guys and one girl jump.

"_Dun dun dun_!" Aaron shouted, popping out from the closet. Cackling, he plopped down on the floor. "Now _that_ was an _awesome_ entrance." The others rolled their eyes.

"Were you waiting in there just so you could do that?" Damion asked, half-heartedly.

Innocently, Aaron slunk back to his bed. "Maybe."

"As I was saying…" Riley continued, standing up now, "I'm gonna head to the mess hall. See you guys there!" The guys gave her disjointed goodbyes, and Riley went out the door.

"Poor Rosetta," Damion sighed, resting his chin on his fist. "Things certainly didn't end too well that night." Mo shook his head.

"After that scheme Riley pulled, I think Rosetta's better off without him. Riley's a jackass." And then, "Riley _F_, that is. Great, we're going to be doing that all season…"

**(Confession Cam: Needs no specification.) **

**Seth**—"Okay…in criticizing Riley's scheming, I'm fairly certain Mo's being a tiny bit of a hypocrite, now. Just a _little tiny_ bit." _(He squeezes his pointer and thumb together to accentuate how much of a 'little tiny bit' it really is.) _"I feel bad…I feel like I wrecked Riley and Rosetta's relationship. I just got so mad, seeing what happened to Bren! Even if I still feel jealous towards Bren sometimes, he didn't deserve that. I feel especially bad…because I think the attack was directed towards me. Yes, Lola, I still suspect you have something to do with this. One of these days my accusations will be correct! I swear it!"

**Damion**—"I'm trying to stay neutral in the midst of all this fighting. I feel bad for Rosetta, but I guess I can see Riley's side of the story. Not to mention, Riley was filling the 'ginger' quota."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Out of all the subdivisions, the male villains seemed to be the least affected by the recent drama. That is, except for Jack, but he was preoccupied with a different dilemma. From on top of his bunk bed, he frowned at Logan, trying to discern what Logan might've done to make Lacey suspicious of him.

"Dude," Logan said suddenly, raising an eyebrow at Jack. "Take a picture; it'll last longer."

"Sorry," Jack muttered, and he fell back to his bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"We should start a football game!" Arlen declared, standing in the middle of the room and pumping a fist in the air.

"Urgh…" Jack groaned, unenthusiastically.

"Mrgh…" Logan grumbled, rolling to his side, away from Arlen.

Zane, from atop of his own bunk bed, raised an eyebrow.

**(Confession Cam: We don't speak the language of the monosyllabic.)**

**Zane**—_(He smirks a little bit.) _"And I thought the angry, incomprehensible mumbling was _my_ thing."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"You guys are moody," Arlen noted, with a scowl. "Don't tell me you're a victim of 'teenage angst'."

"Blame it on the weather," suggested Jack. "It looks like crap out there…and it doesn't look like it'll change anytime soon."

"Which is why we should start a football game!" Arlen pressed. "Come on, it would be awesome in the mud and rain…"

"Arlen…" Logan groaned, impatiently, "please shut the hell up." That, however, did not cope so well with Arlen. He narrowed his eyes, glaring at the shirtless 'bad boy' in front of him.

"You wanna roll over and say that again?" Arlen growled, clenching his fists. "I don't think I heard you correctly."

"Well…" Zane commented dryly, in a quiet tone, "at least he said 'please'…"

**(Confession Cam: Way to help out, Zane.) **

**Zane**—"In hindsight…I probably should've said something else. Like…something that wouldn't make them want to kill each other."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The villainesses were just about to head out to the mess hall when a huge crash made them all jump.

"What was that?" Chelsea exclaimed.

"Well, it wasn't thunder…" Lacey mused. She gave the girls a bit of a smirk. "No, this one sounds like idiocy to me." To prove her point, she opened the door, showing the girls the scene outside. Turns out, Arlen had tackled Logan all the way outside their door. The two were now rolling around in the mud.

"Oh jeez…" Chelsea groaned. She ran forwards and grabbed Arlen by the collar. "Break it up—_break it up_!" Sienna dashed forwards as well and restrained Logan as well.

"_So_…" Lola questioned, sauntering towards the two trapped boys, "who won the slap fight?"

"He started it!" The two boys declared in unison, pointing their fingers at each other.

Lola couldn't resist another jibe. "Lemme guess. Arlen went 'Logan, you have no shirt!' and Logan rebutted with 'Oh yeah? Well you have no belt!' and _so the madness began_…"

Lacey appraised the two other villain boys, who were standing in their doorway. "You guys weren't gonna do anything about this?"

Jack shrugged, and Zane took the opportunity to awkwardly hide his face in the pages of his book.

"You two done now?" Chelsea growled. The two boys nodded, reluctantly, and Chelsea and Sienna released their grips. They glared at each other.

"You were restrained by a _girl_," Arlen taunted. Logan crossed his arms.

"So were you, moron."

"Yeah, but…I mean, _look_ at her…" Arlen nodded, wide-eyed and serious, as he gestured towards Chelsea, who confusedly side-stepped away.

"Pfft…" Logan scoffed. "Well, _I_ just didn't want to hurt Sienna."

"_Excuses_," Sienna chuckled, rolling her eyes.

"Well, if they hadn't interrupted us, I would've kicked—your—_butt_!" Arlen declared menacingly.

"_There's_ a laugh and a half," Logan remarked, sarcastically.

"Oh really?" Arlen questioned, with lowered eyebrows.

"Yeah really," Logan replied, smirking.

"And this…is there version of 'witty banter'," Lacey commented, shaking her head to herself as the group of villains and villainesses traversed towards the mess hall.

Zane and Jack brought up the pack, and much to the confusion of the two, once they had reached the mess hall, Logan and Arlen were grinning, laughing, and punching each other on the shoulder.

"Huh," Logan observed at some point, with a large grin, "you might be as almost as awesome as I am!"

**(Confession Cam: "You guys turn **_**words**_** into **_**dudes**_**!") **

** Jack—**"What…the heck? We just went from bloodshed to a bromance!"

()()()()()()()()()()

Much to the confusion of the villains and villainesses, they were stopped from going into the mess hall by Jess.

"What's the deal?" Chelsea questioned, impatiently.

"What the deal is," Jess replied, sardonically, "is that we…want to play a game."

Jack took a step back. "I want you to know you're sounding like Jigsaw from the _Saw_ movies…"

"Oh, it's not quiet that bad," Jess laughed. "Just give me a sec…" she held up a cautionary finger for a moment, and then retreated to the heroes' bench to grab a stack of papers. "We're gonna play bingo!"

The villains exchanged glances.

"Bingo…?" Zarya repeated, slowly.

"Oh, don't worry, it's not old-people bingo," Jess assured Zarya. "This is…_McClain_ bingo." She began handing out the papers and colored pencils to the villains. "I filled them out this morning. The spaces hold a word or a phrase that Chris is bound to say, today…

"Every time Chris says one of these phrases, you mark it off. You can go ahead and mark off the free space—you'll notice it has the phrase 'the _most_ exciting campfire ceremony _yet'_…"

"So what happens if we get bingo?" Lacey questioned.

"Then you get the stash," Jess replied. "The stash, as I'm sure you'll ask, is a group of these things that we're all chipping in for. It can be money or something random of value—but of course you can't put in something big. I'm sure you wouldn't want to…and if you did, bingo would probably turn angry and violent. And that's…just plain weird. All of the heroes pitched in something…so you guys have to as well, or else you can't play!"

"Well…" Sienna began. "Why not, I guess. Let's go for it." The villains pitched in their random goodies, and Jess let them in the mess hall. They took their bench on the far side of the mess hall and waited for Chris to finally show up.

"Hey Lacey," Jack questioned, "did Chef ever find out it was you who stole his food?"

"Not yet," Lacey replied, smirking.

With a dubious look, Jack smirked as well. "He's gonna find out eventually. I might as well tell you preemptively…it was nice knowing you." Lacey opened her mouth to reply, but Chris walked in then, and the campers excitedly hid their bingo sheets underneath the tops of the benches.

"What's up, campers?" he began.

**(Confession Cam: Err…go fish! Yahtzee! Uno!)**

** Aaron—**_(Holds up his bingo card, grinning.) _"Check!"

**Kit-Kat—**_(Smiles triumphantly, and scribbles something on her card.) _"Got it!"

**Logan—**_(Looks over his bingo card, and scowls.) _"Damn."

()()()()()()()()()

"I hope you all are enjoying the weather," Chris continued, with a mocking expression. The campers, unfazed, kept their eyes glued to the papers they were holding. "It's been a very dramatic season so far…which is _awesome_, by the way. Anyways, despite the minor setbacks with the weather, we'll still be having the challenge…right after lunch!

"My man Chef will be helping me get you guys, and this island, prepared for this next challenge…" Chris continued, eerily.

"Intense," Chelsea deadpanned, as she searched her card. "What's the challenge?"

"Today, campers, we'll be doing a _Spy vs. Spy_ challenge! It's gonna be a long challenge, so dudes and dudettes, you'd better be prepared. There are going to be a lot of different mini-challenges, and every camper we be in one challenge each. You'll either be alone, or in a group of two.

"Back at your cabins, you guys will have some…special attire," Chris added, with a laugh. "And you have to put it on, or Chef and I will _totally_—"

"BINGO!" Kit-Kat cried, slapping her palms on the table and standing up, abruptly. Some of the campers hung their heads and groaned, some rolled their eyes, and some blew raspberries. Jess, however, clapped her hands together and beckoned Kit-Kat over to her spot.

"Alright!" Jess exclaimed. "Let's see what you got. Can you read off what spaces you marked off? I'll check them to make sure they were called." To accentuate her point, Jess brandished a paper she was holding that had a multitude of phrases and quotes written on it.

Chris stared at the girls, absolutely lost. "What's…going…on…?"

"Okay…" Kit-Kat announced, reading off her card. "This is what I've got: 'I hope you all are enjoying the weather'—not so subtle sarcasm, of course, '_awesome_', '_totally'_, 'my man Chef', and 'dudes and dudettes!'"

"Yes!" Jess cheered. "Congratulations, Kit-Kat, you have one…McClain bingo!"

"Drat," Damion sighed, crossing his arms. "All I had left was 'yo, dudes!' and I would've won."

"Again…" Chris glared at the campers. "What?"

Jess continued to ignore Chris. "So…" she questioned Kit-Kat, with a wicked grin. "Once we get back to the cabin, I'll tell you everything you won. The list is long, I assure you…"

"Sweet!" Kit-Kat grinned, and sat back down next to Long, who smiled at her.

"Congratulations," he told her.

"Thanks," Kit-Kat laughed. "I hope you didn't lose anything too valuable with that bet."

Long shook his head. "Just a poetry book."

Kit-Kat frowned, looking at Long, concernedly. "Aw…but you love your poetry. You can have the book back, if you want."

"No, it's fine," Long shook his head. "I'd…rather have you have it, anyways. Besides," he added, "I have a lot of them…I could barely fit them all in my suitcase, to begin with…"

Kit-Kat squeezed Long's hand. "Thanks." Long blushed and looked away, but the silence didn't last long when Kitsune the fox hopped up on the bench and licked Kit-Kat's cheek.

"Oh my gosh!" She laughed. Long looked worried, but Kit-Kat waved him off. "No, no, it's fine. Kitsune is cute." Cheerfully, she petted Kitsune.

"Yeah…" Long agreed softly, but it wasn't Kitsune he was looking at.

From the other side of the table, Rosetta awkwardly looked down at her food.

Damion put a hand on her shoulder.

"You okay?" he asked her quietly.

"Hm?" Rosetta looked up, and gave Damion a quick grin. "Yeah, I'm fine."

**(Confession Cam: Ah…wait…no she's not.)**

** Rosetta—**_(She gives the camera a quick, pained chuckle, and shakes her head.) _"I can't…I can't mope. It's not good for the team, and it's not good for me. Riley's gone, we're through, and…and I'm just gonna have to live with that."

**Lacey—**_(She blows her nose into a handkerchief, and speaks like she has a stuffed nose.) _"Damn that fox and his fluffy furriness!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The campers decided to go back to their cabins, both eager and worried to see what 'special attire' they'd be wearing for the challenge.

"Well, this is…really something…" Jack commented, as he observed himself in the villains' cabin's mirror. He, along with the other villains and villainesses, was wearing a black button up top with black dress pants, black socks, and black pants. Completing the ensemble was a black fedora with a white stripe around it, and a black pair of (what were evidently called) "stunna shades".

"Very…classy…?" Arlen tried for, as he fiddled with his buttons.

"Oh, I get it…" Zane mused, mostly to himself. "It's the Spy vs. Spy challenge, so we look like the black spy from the comics from the _Mad_ magazine. The heroes probably look like the white spy…"

Sure enough, that was the case. The heroes and heroines were wearing a white button-up shirt, white dress pants, white socks/shoes, black "stunna shades", and a white fedora with a black stripe around it—basically, the complete invert of the villains' getup.

"I kinda like it," Riley told her fellow heroines with a grin, as she adjusted her fedora. "I feel badass."

"What do we do now?" Glisa asked.

"Chris said to head back to the mess hall once we were dressed," Rosetta replied. She frowned as she observed her glaringly white outfit. "This won't go well with the mud…"

"I don't suppose we could get the guys to carry us," Jess mused, as she clipped on her tie.

"It's worth a shot," Riley responded, suddenly looking towards the doorway, hopefully.

Rosetta gave her a skeptical look. "You aren't really going to…?"

Riley ran out the door, taking a beeline towards the heroes' cabin.

"Wait for me!" Glisa exclaimed, following soon after.

()()()()()()()()()()

As the campers arrived to the mess hall—some by walking, some by piggy-back—Chris quickly hurried his phone conversation.

"So, make sure it's ready by—yes, yes, okay—two o'clock—got it?" There was a short pause. "Don't be stupid, of course not." Another pause. "No, _I'm_ the boss, so you'll do what _I_ say." Another short pause, and Chris narrowed his eyes. "Hey, leave my mother out of this…!" When the first of the campers walked through the doors, Chris sped the conversation up considerably: "Kthanksbye," he chewed out, before snapping the phone shut.

"Lookin' good, campers! Spy vs. Spy definitely fits for Heroes vs. Villains," He chuckled, making the 'gun-shape' sign with his hands. "You guys ready for this?"

Zarya rolled her eyes (although nobody could see, behind the shades), and muttered, "Are we ever?"

"Here are the groups you'll be in," Chris continued, as he took out a laminated sheet. "Like I said, there's a chance you'll be going at this solo. But hey, that's what all the cool spies do!

"Still…for those who are in groups, we'll be balancing out the advantages and disadvantages. So, since the heroes have more…well…heroes, they'll probably be at an advantage for one challenge…but a disadvantage for another.

"And, whether you're in a group or not, you might be going against the villains."

Glisa tilted her head. "_Might_?" She repeated. "What's the other possibility?"

Chris grinned. "You'll find out. Sooner or later…

"Anyways, here are the groups. I'll tell you who you're with—if you're with anyone—and then you need to go exactly where I tell you to. Once you arrive there, you'll receive further instructions." When Chris called out a campers name and destination, they left without too much hesitation.

"Glisa and Mo…go to the heroines' cabin.

"Sienna…go back to your cabin as well.

"Arlen…move right to the Confession Cam.

"Aaron…go to the woods behind the confession cam.

"Kit-Kat and Seth…stay in here.

"Zarya…you're staying here as well.

"Riley…you're going to go to the Dock of Shame." Riley raised an eyebrow, and Chris added, "No, you're not getting eliminated." He grinned, mischievously. "Not yet, anyways. Err…Zane, you're also going to go to the Dock of Shame.

"Chelsea, you're going to go villains' cabin.

"Long, you're going to go back to your cabin, the heroes', cabin.

"Rosetta and Jess, you two will be going to the field where we played capture the flag.

"Jack and Lola, you'll be going with 'em!

"Bren and Damion, you two will be going back into Chef's kitchen." Seth and Bren exchanged nervous glances, and Chris smirked. "You might want to cover your heads. Anyways, that leaves…Logan and Lacey. You two will be going in the kitchen as well." He grinned, although the majority of the campers were gone. "Let the spy games begin!"

()()()()()()()()()

"Ooh, this is _muy intrigante_!" Glisa declared, striding into the heroines' cabin and jumping around. "I wonder what we'll be doing for our challenge! Where are the instructions, though, I wonder?"

"Maybe," Mo chuckled, hesitantly walking in the room as well, "in that not-so-inconspicuous gift box in the middle of the room." Glisa stopped her excited dance for a moment, in order to notice that there was, in fact, a giant white box with a huge black bow around it.

"Everything in dis episode is colored so monotonously…" Glisa complained. She walked over to the box and squatted down. "Let's see what dis is, I guess!" Mo knelt down next to the box as well as Glisa pulled off the bow and ripped the box open.

The two teammates peered inside.

"That's…" Mo raised an eyebrow. "A peculiar looking thing…" Not a second later, a purplish gas was emitted from the box, making the two campers exceptionally woozy.

"Drunken…elephant…" Glisa yawned, before she fell to the grown with a thud. Not long after, Mo fell to the ground, snoring peacefully.

All the while, a mysterious shadow was cast over the two as a newcomer walked in the room…

()()()()()()()()()()

"I suppose it's a little suspicious that they decided to gift-wrap their instructions for the challenge…" Sienna muttered to herself, eyeing the gift box with distaste. Unlike Mo and Glisa, she felt a bit hesitant about this whole challenge and general, and she had the feeling that there'd be something underhanded going on, here.

Eventually, she sighed, pulling the bow off of the box and opening it. "Only way to start the challenge is to delve into the stupidity, eh?"

As she looked in the contents of the box, she scowled. "Stupid spy clichés." She didn't turn away in time to avoid breathing in the gas, and soon enough she was sleeping on the ground as well.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Arlen walked around the Confession Cam, but didn't see anything in the lieu of instructions. The rain had thankfully stopped, for now, but he still felt irritable.

"What, am I supposed to wing it?" he grumbled to himself. "Well, that won't work…I don't even know what I'd be winging…"

Feeling desperate, he flung open the door to the Confession Cam. "Hello? Yo? Anybody there?"

The last thing he remembered was a flash of gray, before he was knocked unconscious.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Aaron jumped in surprise when he saw Arlen whisked away from the Confession Cam, carried off by some mysterious figure clothed in gray. Hesitantly, he walked towards the Confession Cam, wondering if this was part of the challenge.

He got sidetracked when he saw a white, cardboard box on the ground. On it was a caricature of a bald Italian man with a handlebar moustache, gleefully rejoicing over a large Pepperoni pizza.

"Yay!" Aaron cheered. He opened the box eagerly, but then frowned once he saw the inside of the box.

'That's not pizza…" was the last thing he said, before the gas put him to sleep.

()()()()()()()()()()

Unlike the campers so far—Kit-Kat, Seth, and Zarya were not to be knocked unconscious or put to sleep. Confused, they waited in the mess hall, awaiting their instructions. Chris has promised to return, but he had left almost twenty minutes ago, and he was still not back.

"Great," Seth sighed. "Is this part of the challenge? I'm really not sure what we're supposed to do, here…"

Kit-Kat shrugged, but smiled. "I'm sure we'll get some sort of hint. Still, this is an unusually long time…hey, Zarya, any idea what we're doing?" Zarya shrugged, absentmindedly, not really paying attention to the two heroes.

"Maybe we could ask Chef?" Kit-Kat suggested. Seth raised his eyebrows, his eyes widening, as he slowly shook his head. Grinning apologetically, Kit-Kat added, "Or not…"

The conversation ended when the lights went out and suddenly there was a sound of a gunshot. The lights flickered on, and Chef staggered through the doorway, covered in a red substance.

Seth screamed shrilly.

"No, Seth, it's okay!" Kit-Kat comforted him. "I recognize that…it's not blood, it's red food dye!"

"Oh, I knew that," Seth said, nervously. "Err…I think that was Zarya who screamed…"

Zarya rolled her eyes. "Like hell it was…"

Chef dramatically fell to the ground, and Chris cackled running out to the mess hall and brandishing…a water gun. Even Seth had to raise an eyebrow, cynically, at this _what-is-this-nonsense_ moment.

"The name of the game is _catch_," Chris announced, as he jumped over Chef's 'dead' body and sashayed towards the doorway. "Whoever catches me first scores a point for their team!" With that announced, he soon sprinted out the doorway, with impressive speed—considering the fact that he wasn't much for hard work.

The campers were in shock at the abruptness of it all, but they soon ran out too, determined to do whatever this challenge might entail.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Riley whistled to herself, awkwardly, as she rocked back and forth on her heels. Zane, feeling just as hopelessly awkward, stared out into the Wawanakwa Lake, awaiting some instructions or a kind notice or a sign from God, perhaps.

"Best of luck," Riley said suddenly.

Zane glanced at her. "Hm?"

"Best of luck with the challenge," Riley elaborated pleasantly. "If it's just you and me, I have a feeling we'll be going against each other so…" she extended a hand towards Zane, and said cheerfully, "Good luck!" Hesitantly, Zane shook her hand.

"Thanks," he said, slowly. "You…too…?"

**(Confession Cam: The butler did it.)**

** Zane—**"Riley seems nice…and she doesn't seem to be faking it. I feel like I could knock her off the 'suspect list'. Which, by the way, I've actually made…I've compiled together a list of all the people who'd have a reason to dislike me." _(He pulls out a piece of paper, but then the underside rolls out farther, revealing that the paper is actually really freaking long. Zane sighs, adjusts his glasses, and peers at the list.) _"This process might take a while…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Huh…" Riley mused, suddenly looking to the left. Zane followed her gaze, and blinked a few times, surprised. A huge ship was slowly driving their direction. It was a cruise ship, to be precise. The ship was glossy white, and pretty darn big, for a ship on a lake. A gigantic sign covered most of the side of the ship that faced the two campers; it read—'Welcome, Zane and Riley!'

"Why did they put your name first?" Riley complained. Zane just looked at the ship, still in shock. Riley grinned at the stunned loner. "Looks like this is our ride!" Sure enough, the boat stopped right in front of the dock, and a window on the side opened up, offering access to the two campers.

"I…I don't feel quiet comfortable with this," Zane muttered.

"Nonsense!" Riley rebutted. "This is all perfectly safe." Zane knitted his eyebrows together, and Riley added, "If you don't climb in there I'll throw you in." Zane was pretty sure she wasn't bluffing, so with a sigh, he took a few steps forward, then ran back, and jumped, getting a decent hold on the sides of the window. He squirmed for a bit, and finally wormed his way in. Riley followed suit, and much to her surprise, the boat started moving again, the second her feet touched the ground.

"Huh…" Riley mused. "Maybe this is a little suspicious." Zane groaned and slapped his forehead.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Chelsea walked around the villains' cabin, although it was held in such messy disarray she was tempted to just leave. Or set it on fire. Playing with the idea, she began to flick her lighter on and off.

Suddenly, something heavy slipped through the guys open window, landing on their dresser with a thud. After a brief, startled moment, she edged over to it, inspecting it with curiosity. It was a note…attached to a long, metal object that appeared to be a gun.

The first thing on the note said:

_It's a __paintball__ gun. Don't get any ideas._

Chelsea chuckled lowly.

_Anyways, one of the biggest part of a spy's career is the ability to stay alive during a shoot-out. And that's just what you'll be doing. Try to avoid Long's shots…we've been told getting hit by a paint ball is like getting a marble chucked at you. The first one to give up or to fall to the ground loses._

_ So have fun!_

Chelsea crumpled the note, tossed it over her shoulder, and readied her paint gun. "Thanks, Chris. I think I will…"

()()()()()()()()()()

Long raised an eyebrow as he lifted his paintball gun and got the feel of it. Like Chelsea, he had been walking around in his cabin before the note and the gun came.

"This should be interesting…" he murmured to himself. He began to move slowly, cautiously, as he edged out the doorway. "Chelsea does scare me a bit, though…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Rosetta and Jess finally made it to the clearing. For the most part, it had been a quiet walk. They hadn't talked much in the previous challenges, so they didn't know each other all that well. Jess had to fight the urge to ask her about Riley F, however.

"Huh…" Rosetta mused, as she peered into the distance. "Are those speedboats for us?" Sure enough, at the very edge of the field, where the beach was, two speedboats rested on the shore.

Jess grinned. "I sure hope so. One's black, one's white. Considering the theme, it seems like a reasonable guess."

"If not," Rosetta added, with a smirk, "then hey, free speed boats. C'mon, let's go, while Jack and Lola are still behind…!" The two girls ran off.

()()()()()()()()()

Jack and Lola, following an equally silent (and somewhat unpleasant) walk, arrived to the clearing not long after.

"The girls were ahead of us, but I don't see them…" Jack commented, scowling, as he surveyed the field.

"Great," Lola muttered sourly. "So they've already got the head start. What do we do now?"

"Hijack a speed boat?" Jack suggested, as his eyes fell on the black speed boat waiting for them on the shore. "My guess is, instructions are in that boat. Let's go."

"Shotgun!" Lola announced, as the two ran down.

Jack glanced at her. "Does that still apply to a _boat_?"

Lola shrugged. "I don't care; I'm just not driving."

()()()()()()()()()()

The final four campers—Bren, Damion, Logan, and Lacey—had been in the kitchen when Chef had splattered himself with red food dye (they were confused at that, but not all that surprised). Chris had walked into the kitchen sometime after that, and played the noise of a gunshot using an app from his iPhone.

Now, they were stuck waiting while Chef put his stained clothes in the washing machine and put on a different outfit. It was about a fifteen minute wait before Chef finally walked in the kitchen again, only to be wearing the same clothes he had before.

"Do you just have, like, twenty pairs of the same outfit?" Lacey questioned.

"That and his dresses…" Logan muttered.

Bren and Damion, however, just exchanged glances.

**(Confession Cam: Too stupid for words, but words will have to do…)**

** Bren—**"I'm all for making fun of Chris, but when it comes to Chef…" _(He draws a line across his throat.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Why don't you shut ya pie holes before I shut 'em for you!" Chef grumbled. "Follow me, maggots!" He led the four campers down to one corner of the kitchen. To Bren and Damion, it was unfamiliar, but Logan and Lacey recognized it instantly.

"Oh hey," Lacey realized. "This is the passage to the 'base' we had, last challenge!"

"You guys had a base?" Damion questioned. Lacey nodded. "Well, no wonder!"

"Did I not just say shut your pie holes?" Chef barked.

"…yes?" Logan guessed, tentatively.

Chef flung the trapdoor to the underground 'base', grabbed Logan by the collar, and shoved him in.

"…or not," Lacey muttered, but shut her mouth quickly when Chef gave her a piercing glare. Thankfully, the other three campers had the opportunity to climb down to the base using the ladder. Chef led them down corridors and hallways, and the ground they traveled on started sloping downhill.

Soon enough, there was a huge hole in the wall that led to a new, considerably darker area. Although the hole wasn't all that big, the area inside it was. Although it was darker, the campers could see that there were a couple inches of water on the ground. The walls were concrete.

Damion took a few steps back. "Oh dear. This…is an entrance to…the sewers?"

"Wait a second," Lacey objected, with a frown, "this island has a sewer system? I've never seen any drains. Unless…" her eye twitched. "Please, for the love of God, tell me this isn't a 'waste' sewer."

Chef laughed, clearly amused with the thought. "Ha! I wish! No, there _are_ some storm drains, and thanks to the recent heavy rain, this place has a good amount of water. And a few surprises." He grinned.

"So, what're we trying to do in here?" Logan asked, gesturing to the sewers with poorly-hidden distaste.

"You're trying to get to the other exit, that's what!" Chef replied. "It's a maze. Here," he said, as he handed a flashlight to each pair. "You'll need these. The first duo to reach the end scores a point towards their team!"

"And if we never get out?" Damion asked. He knew it was unlikely, but he figured he should cover all his bases.

"Then," Chef replied, already heading back towards the kitchen, "I hope you don't mind drinking sewer water for the rest of ya life…!"

The four campers shivered. With feeble glances at each other, they reluctantly began climbing in the sewer.

"That was a joke," Bren assured himself, in a quiet whisper, as he climbed eased himself down to the ground of the sewer. "What Chef said was a joke." A few steps in the cold, sewer water, and he shivered yet again. "At least, I sure hope so…"

()()()()()()()()()

"Ay!" Glisa woke up with a jolt, and whipped her head around, startled at her new surroundings. It was a very barren room—dark in color, and lit only by flickering fluorescent lights. What surprised and confused Glisa most of all was the fact that she was in a cage. On the opposite end of the cage, Mo was still fast asleep.

Glisa crawled over to him and shook him by the shoulder. "Mo? Mo? Time to get up! We are in a cage! And it smells funny in here!"

Mo's eyes opened and he went through the same momentary shock that Glisa had.

"Ugh…" he groaned, as he clutched his head. "Where are we?" He glanced at his wrist. "And why am I wearing a watch…?"

"This must be part of da challenge!" Glisa murmured, examining the surroundings. "But what are we supposed to be doing?"

"_Hello, Mo and Glisa_!" Greeted a voice. Glisa yelped and covered her head with her hands.

"They know our names!" She wailed.

The voice's tone became cautious. _"Uh…dudes, it's me. Chris McClain."_

Glisa sat up again. "Oh."

_"Anyways! You two have been kidnapped for part of the challenge! As you must know, a major part of a spy's life is the ability to escape from a trap that would lead to their imminent death!"_

"How is this leading to our imminent—" Mo began asking, but he soon regretted it, when the ground opened up, revealing a tank of angry-looking sharks that jumped up and snapped at them. They were hundreds of feet above it (the room was rather large), but very, very slowly, the cage began lowering.

Glisa and Mo gulped.

_"Once the cage touches water, then it'll fall apart leaving you two to in the shark pool," _Chris cackled. _"If you do manage to escape beforehand…then it's a point for your team! Hooray! Oh, and you don't die. That's cool too. Now then, I'm gonna leave you two to your doom without actually waiting around to make sure you die…like a true super-villain! Later, campers!"_

"He wouldn't actually lower us all the way down there, would he?" Mo questioned, nervously, as he eyed the sharks below the two.

"I am not sure," Glisa whimpered, "but I don't want to stick around and test out Chris's sense of morals!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Also recovering from the sleeping gas was Sienna, who groggily regained her eyesight and took in her surroundings. She was also in a cage, as that seemed to be all the rage nowadays. Sighing to herself, she stumbled to her feet and walked around, figuring that the challenge was to escape from the cage.

_"Greetings Sienna!" _said Chris McClain, cheerfully.

Sienna gave a lazy wave in no particular direction. "Hey."

_"Anyways…the reason you're in this cage is that you're to escape from your imminent doom…" _Sienna couldn't help but prick up her ears at the words 'imminent doom', as that is not a phrase that one likes to hear. She looked down at the ground, where creaking noises were starting to come from. Inside a large tank were about eight or nine electrical eels.

_"At this very moment…Glisa and Mo are trying to escape from their cage, as they began to get closer and closer to a tank of sharks!" _Chris chuckled evilly.

"That's the best you could come up with?" Sienna questioned, putting her hands on her hips. "Lowering people into various deadly aquatic animals?"

_"Shut up!" _Chris whined. _"We blew the budget on some many other things for this challenge; we couldn't buy anything cool like lasers. Or…sharks that shoot lasers from their eyes. Hoo boy, __that__ would be cool."_

"Agh…" Sienna groaned. "How long do I have?"

"Well, I'm not sure on the exact time," Chris replied, smirking, "but the countdown just began—" the cage began to slowly creak downwards, "_now_."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"No point in waiting," Riley commented, as she prominently put her hands on her hips. "Shall we see what's in store for us?" She grinned at Zane, who looked at her desolately.

After realizing Riley wouldn't move on until he answered affirmatively, Zane sighed, "Sure…I guess…?"

The room that the two had landed in was like a small hotel room. There was a bed, a desk with a TV on it, a mini-fridge, a closet, and a bathroom.

"Alright, we are totally _inconspicuous_ in this getup," Riley chuckled, examining herself in the room's full-length mirror. "Any chance this is a Halloween party?"

"Considering this is _July_…" Zane muttered, which was, to be honest, an adequate response. "But the sign on the ship…they're expecting us. So, they know who we are…and they must know we're in these ridiculous clothes."

Riley appraised him with mock solemnity. "Dude. Don't diss the stunna shades."

Zane really wasn't sure how to respond.

Finally, the two of them got the gall to open the door, to see what they would be up against.

All things considered, it wasn't what they were expecting.

It was a huge room, the ship's main room, it seemed. A formal party seemed to be going on. A large chandelier dangled from the middle of the ceiling, illuminating the spectacular room. There was fancy food on the tables on the sides, and being carried around by two or three well-dressed people, who seemed to be teenagers as well.

In fact, much to Zane and Riley's continued bewilderment, everyone in the room seemed to be around their age. And in this large, large room, there were only about…twenty-two people.

"Good afternoon, Riley," a young, tan man greeted them, after a little bow. He had messy brown hair, tan skin, and green eyes. He looked straight at Riley, and ignored Zane completely. "Thank you for coming! We're glad to have you here."

Zane was beginning to feel a little unwelcome.

"My name is Kenny," the boy continued. "And I will be your server tonight."

"Um…thanks, Kenny," Riley said, slowly.

"Care for a drink?" Kenny questioned. "Some appetizers, perhaps? We have shrimp, pigs-in-a-blanket, instructions, mozzarella sticks…"

Riley held up a finger. "Ah…did you say instructions?"

Kenny grinned, almost impishly. "I did indeed. Right this way, miss…ah…"

"Riley," said Riley. "Err…miss the sign out front?" She asked, as the two walked away.

"Sorry about that," Kenny apologized awkwardly. Riley looked back to give Zane a quick, apologetic smile. Zane desperately looked around, awaiting some dues ex machina.

He got his wish. Sort of.

"My name's Effie and I will be your _SERVERRRRRRR_!" Wailed a female voice, coming from Zane's left. He turned his head just in time to see a redheaded psychopath tackle him to the ground.

"Hi!" She chirped. She looked very similar to another contestant, and Zane didn't have all that trouble putting a finger on who…

"Izzy?" He questioned, weakly.

"No, silly!" Effie replied. "I am Effie! Her super-awesome-incredibly-awesome-sauce sister!"

"Right…" Zane managed to struggle to his feet. "Do you…have some…instructions for me?"

Effie crossed her arms. "You sure you don't want to try the pigs-in-a-blanket first? They're really good! And I mean, it's not like they just wrapped a live pig in some wool sheets or something, they're like, these little tiny hot dogs and—"

"Thanks," Zane said, trying to remain patient, "but I really do need those instructions. Effie shrugged, still happy as ever, and skipped away to lead Zane towards the answers he needed.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Jess and Rosetta had found directions in their speedboat, nothing more, but they followed the directions diligently. Once they reached the shore, they climbed and ran out, hoping to see something that might be a part of their challenge.

"You know what I just realized?" Rosetta commented, as the two climbed out of their boat and ran past the shore. "We were just riding a metal boat when it still looks like crap outside. We are so not setting a good example."

"That's what the disclaimers are for!" Jess replied.

"Do we still have those?" Rosetta asked. Jess shrugged, turned to the nearest camera, and began to wave her arms and shout:

"We're stupid! And fictional! Don't follow our lead!" With that, she turned back and gave Rosetta a thumb up. "Good?"

With a slight smirk, Rosetta returned the gesture. "Good. Hey, big-ass building, twelve-o'-clock." The two slowed to a walk, to take in the sight of the building. It was pretty nondescript, just a wide-and-tall building with few windows and few notable features.

On the side they approached was a big, black door.

"Other side?" Jess guessed. Rosetta shrugged, but the two ran to the other side anyways. Sure enough, there was a door that matched the other one, except for the color: white. The two girls opened it and ventured inside.

The room was dimly let and very foggy. The thing that was easiest to make out was a bright red button that was right next to the door the girls had come in.

"Shall we?" Rosetta asked. Jess nodded, but Rosetta couldn't see this. "Are you nodding?" Jess nodded again. "Let's assume that's a yes…" Rosetta thumped the button with her fist.

Instantly, lasers appeared all over the room, and suddenly the girls could see how very, very large the room was. On the opposite end of the room a bright arrow pointed up, apparently to their next destination.

"Great…" Jess muttered. She tapped Rosetta on the shoulder. "You first, buddy. I'll cheer you on."

()()()()()()()()()

Jack and Lola soon found themselves in an identical situation. A thin barrier separated their laser room from the heroes' laser room, and what they didn't know is that the pairs would face identical obstacle after identical obstacle until one pair reached the end.

"So…" Jack asked Lola. "Uh…do you want to go first? I mean, you're wearing a skirt, but ah…"

Lola narrowed her eyes, and Jack rolled his.

"Sheesh," Jack muttered. "I'm just asking!" Lola continued to glare at him. "Come on, it's not like I'm gonna _look_ or something!"

"Keep talking," Lola warned, "and we're gonna find out what happens when I push you in a mass of lasers."

Jack groaned. "You're a barrel of fun, aren't you? This challenge should be _great_."

Lola pretended to inspect her nails. "Five, four…"

A tad worried, Jack began his path through the lasers. "Damn it, woman…!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Arlen opened his eyes, but soon after wished he hadn't.

His head was thudding like crazy from…whatever happened to him. He couldn't move his legs or his arms. He was sitting on a chair, and upon further inspection he saw that his arms were tied behind the chair and his legs were tied to it.

"Oh, hey!" Aaron said cheerfully, making Arlen jump a bit in surprise. Aaron was in an identical situation to Arlen, in fact, the chairs they were tied to were back to back. The room they were in was dark, dank, dingy, and depressing. "How's it going?"

Arlen laughed, darkly. "I've been better."

"Sleeping gas?" Aaron guessed.

"No…" Arlen squinted, trying to remember. "Yeah…no, it wasn't sleeping gas. Is that what happened to you?"

"Yup," Aaron replied. He whimpered, "I got lured in by pizza!"

Arlen sighed, sympathetically. "We've all been there."

"So, I take it this is part of the challenge, then…" Aaron mused. He appraised Arlen with curiosity. "So, how'd you end up here, then?"

"I think I got bonked on the head," groaned Arlen. He turned his head towards Aaron.

"Oh, yeah," Aaron widened his eyes. "You've got a _huuuuge_ bump on your head."

"Damn it!" Arlen shouted, thrashing around in his chair. (He didn't manage to do much.) "Someone is so getting their ass handed to them, I am so not—" his threat was cut short when a newcomer walked in the room. The newcomer was clothed entirely in gray, so much so that the boys couldn't tell if it was male or female. Finally, the gray one stopped at a point where both Arlen and Aaron could see him/her/it. Him/Her/It removed a mask that covered his/her/its face, and smiled at the two.

**(Confession Cam: All of the coolest spies are British)**

** Aaron-**_(For GOD KNOWS what reason, Aaron is wearing a monocle, holding a cup of tea, and speaking in a British accent.) _"Oh _dear_!" _(Then, he glances at his Chamomile tea with confusion.) _"I feel bad that I stole this from Chef…" **(1)**

()()()()()()()()()()

**(A.N.) **Haha…yes, it's a two-part challenge! I'm excited for the conclusion to this, and I hope you guys like it. I tried to make this challenge (and chapter) a bit more light-hearted.

Anyways, there are two things I would really appreciate you guys doing for me. I need to know this for two future challenges…

Number one: Does your character have any musical abilities, and what kind of music does he/she like…?

Number two: Can you tell me five completely random and somewhat irrelevant things about your character?

**(1) **Okay...that was...funnier in my head. For those who don't get it, just think of the saying "not my cup of tea", then remember my dumb sense of humor, and there ya go.

Oh, and expect to see more of those dorks on Riley and Zane's cruise ship party. They're from my first send-in story...I'm giving them cameos pretty much for my own kicks. Kenny belongs to TaylorMan021983 and Effie belongs to CaptJessicaSparrow.

As for the mysterious gray person...you'll have to wait and see!

So...GOOD DAY!


	9. I Spy, You Spy, We All Spy

**(A.N.) **I'm glad people like this challenge—it's probably my favorite so far, as well! Anyways, here's to the thrilling conclusion.

The "thrilling conclusion" is brought to you by: zero continuity with how I spell Chris's last name. Heh…

Before each snippet/scene, there's a bold note in parentheses. This is just in case you forget what each camper is doing…there are a lot of challenges, so I figured this might be useful. Or not.

On a completely irrelevant note, I highly recommend _The Marriage of True Minds_ by Stephen Evans. It's the funniest book I've read in a long time; it's rather sweet, as well. Go buy it. Like, right now.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The camera rested on a very nice view of Wawanakwa Lake. The sun started to peak out of the dark, gloomy clouds, making the calm water sparkle. Not long after, the spectacle was interrupted when Chris rode into view on a speedboat, disrupting what little serenity Wawanakwa had. He grinned at the camera and waved, and started talking—although he had to shout a bit over the sound of the motor.

"Hello, viewers!" He greeted. "Yes, we're not quite done with this episode yet…we've still got a ways to go. However, I thought you guys might need a quick recap, just so you know what the campers are going up against, in case you forgot…!" As he went through each camper's strange predicament, the camera switched to a brief shot of their situations.

"Mo, Glisa, and Sienna are trying to escape from being dumped into a tank of either sharks or electric eels!

"Rosetta, Jess, Jack, and Lola are going through a series of spy-related obstacles. Currently, they're trying to make it past a laser maze!

"To be perfectly honest, we still aren't very sure what Zane and Riley are doing…

"Damion, Bren, Lacey, and Logan are traversing through a dark and creepy sewer maze, underneath Camp Wawanakwa!

"Long and Chelsea are engaged in a heart-pounding paintball shoot-out!

"Arlen and Aaron? Well, they're currently…incapacitated, and at the mercy of a mysterious gray person…

"And as for Kit-Kat, Seth, and Zarya…" Chris's grin grew, and he sped away, past the view of the camera. Not long after, another speed boat pulled up to view. Seth was steering and Kit-Kat was holding a giant butterfly and eyeing it with major uncertainty.

"Get back here, evil-doer!" Seth exclaimed indignantly, as he increased the speed of his boat substantially. Their boat sped away, and a new boat rode up as well. Zarya, who was driving a boat by herself, eyed the camera, gave a sarcastic, half-hearted wave, and followed after the two speedboats ahead.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(The paintball shoot-out)**

Long kept low and kept quiet as he made his way towards the mess hall. He kept his paint gun ready, and kept his ears open. With all the other campers seemingly off the island, any little noise made him whip his gun around and point its barrel at the source. (This, however, frightened many a innocent squirrel.)

He racked his brain, trying to think of everything he knew about Chelsea, but the list was limited. He was pretty certain she was somewhat crazy, and impulsive, so he had a bad feeling this "shoot-out" game was gonna be a long, unpleasant one. Well, unpleasant for one of them, at least.

Long decided to make a base out of the mess hall. He managed to reach his destination without any trouble from Chelsea. Hesitantly, he opened the door, ready to shoot if need be. There were no gunshots and no cries of "_Say hello to my little friend!", _so Long deemed it safe.

He had an idea, although it was more on the defensive side. If he could wait here and hide, Chelsea would eventually come in, having searched the island for him. From his hiding spot, he could land a few hits…and the game would be over.

He searched the room, surveying the possibilities…then focused his gaze, and smirked.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(The mysterious boat party)**

Riley nibbled on a piece of shrimp, eyeing the inhabitants of the ship's party with curiosity. Nothing looked too terribly out of the ordinary, so she was thankful Kenny was assigned to give her instructions.

"So, here's the deal," Kenny explained. "There are two people in this party that have some very valuable information."

"What information?" Riley questioned.

"They know the combo to a safe. There are two safes, one can be accessed through that door," he pointed towards a door on one side of the room, "and one can be accessed through that door," he pointed towards a door on the opposite side of the first. "The combo works to both safes, it doesn't matter which one you choose. There are two safes because there are two of you."

"But wait," Riley interrupted. "Isn't the object of this to get the combo before Zane does?"

Kenny hesitated. "Yes and no."

Riley smirked, leaned against the wall, and crossed her arms. "Now there's a vague answer if I've ever heard one." Kenny rolled his eyes, and elaborated.

"This party is made up of many different people," he began. "All of them are from the same season, but we all have different roles in this. Effie and I are here to instruct you and Zane on what's going on. Most of the campers here don't know what's going on. Two of the campers know the safe's combo. But some of the campers…they know there's a safe, but they don't know the combo to it.

"_Those_ campers will be waiting to see if you can find the combo. If you do, and they realize it, they'll follow you to the safe, let you open the safe for them…and then take you down." Kenny paused, dramatically.

"How do I find the combo in the first place?" Riley questioned. "I doubt I can just go around, asking people if they know the combo."

"Unfortunately, you're right," Kenny laughed. "You have to be subtle. The people who know the combo can't tell you directly…but they'll try to help you. Just go around the party, and keep your eyes and ears open. If you find the combo…be very, _very_ cool about it."

"Wouldn't I tip off the people who want the combo when I left through the doors?"

"They don't know where the safe is," Kenny replied. "So if you pull it off correctly, they might just think you're going to the bathroom or something."

"What do I do once I get the 'loot'?" Riley asked.

"Then, you run back to the room you entered in," Kenny answered. "Someone's already installed a getaway boat that's hanging from the outside of the boat. Once you jump into the getaway boat, you can get away from here!"

Riley massaged her forehead. "This is complicated."

"That, I can agree on you with…" Kenny mused. He spaced off into the distance, and then widened his eyes when a young Latino woman approached them. "Leti! Hi!"

Leti widened her eyes too, broke out into a huge grin, and proceeded to tackle-hug Kenny to the ground.

"Oh my God!" She squealed, hugging Kenny to the point of oxygen deprivation, "you're in a tux! You even have a bowtie! You're like a waiter…a waiter that's so freaking cute it's unbearable!"

Riley awkwardly backed away as Leti continued, in great lengths, to declare how incredibly gosh darn cute Kenny was. "I'll leave you two alone…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Escaping from the cage)**

"I don't want to die…!" Glisa whimpered, pacing around the cage in distress. The cage had made progress—not substantial progress, but progress nonetheless—closer to the sharks. "Dis is not how I thought it would end!"

"How'd you think it would end?" Mo couldn't help but question.

"I'm not sure on da specifics…it involved explosives and a sock monkey named Sancho…"

Mo sighed. "Personally, I had a feeling I might meet my maker on this show."

Glisa and Mo had looked over the cage many times over for any sort of means of escape, but there didn't appear to be any.

"Chris wouldn't leave us without a way out, though," Mo muttered. "Right?"

Glisa shrugged. "With Chris, how can you be sure?"

Mo slunk back down into a sitting position, and then blinked a few times as a thought came to him. "Wait…" he displayed his wrist to Glisa, showing her the watch that he was wearing.

"Huh…" Glisa tilted her head. "Oh, yeah! Didn't you say dat da watch was not yours?"

Mo nodded, and began inspecting the watch more closely. "Maybe this really is here for a reason…"

Glisa knelt down to observe the watch as well. "So people can be sure of our time of death?" Mo smirked at this, but shook his head, as he began fiddling with the watch's knobs. Suddenly, something shot out of the side of the watch—whizzing just an inch away from Glisa's ear.

"Ay!" She wailed, covering her ear and shrinking away from Mo. "Watch where you aim dat!" The two stayed where they were, shocked for a moment, and then slowly walked over to see what the watch had spat out.

Mo picked the mysterious object off of the ground. "It looks like a tiny harpoon…but what would we need it for?"

Mo handed the mini harpoon to Glisa, who looked at it with curiosity.

After a moment, she giggled. "Got any miniature whales?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Also escaping from a cage)**

Sienna peered down to the electric eel tank, for the umpteenth time.

"Are those things lethal?" She wondered to herself.

_"Wanna test it out?" _Chef questioned, chuckling, over the intercom. Sienna rolled her eyes, fighting the urge to start a swearing streak. Chris, after his brief instructions, had left (to 'murder' Chef and get chased by Seth, Kit-Kat, and Zarya). Sienna had not been expecting Chef to start pitching in to her situation as well.

"Great," she muttered. "One idiot leaves and another replaces him. It's like the panel of judges on _American Idol_…"

_"You're not doing yourself any good by being snappy, girly!" _Chef warned.

"I'm in a freaking cage!" Sienna exploded, flailing her arms around herself. "I'll be as snappy as I want to be, damn it!"

_"Fine then! Have it your way! I __won't__ help you!" _Chef growled. Aggravated, Sienna sighed, closed her eyes, and put her palm to her forehead.

"Why," she began, "would you want to help me?"

_"I don't want to help you…" _Chef grumbled. _"But we did say we were gonna be fair this challenge."_

"Definitely a change in pace," Sienna remarked.

_"Shaddup! Chris said the heroes would be at an advantage for one mini-challenge, and a disadvantage for another. Kit-Kat and Seth are working together, so that's the advantage. However, Glisa and Mo are in the same cage, so they're working together as well. However, __both__ of them have to successfully escape…and, to make it more of a disadvantage, they don't get me to guide their sorry butts out of that place!"_

"Well…" Sienna paused. "Thanks, I guess. How helpful do you get to be?"

_"Err…somewhere between 'kind of' and 'sort-of-but-not-really'!" _Chef replied. _"So for now, I'll leave you with this hint…and see how you're faring in five minutes!"_

"What's the hint?" Sienna decided to ask the obvious question.

In response, oddly enough, was Chris. But…it sounded like a recording. Sienna realized it was a playback of something Chris had said earlier, presumably to Glisa and Mo.

_"Once the cage touches water, then it'll fall apart, leaving you two to in the shark pool," _Chris's recording cackled.

Sienna pondered this, as she put her purse down on the ground and paced around the cage some more. "Hm…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Trekking through the sewer maze)**

"I'm pretty sure we've been here before," Logan complained, as he and Lacey rounded another corner. Lacey rolled her eyes, shining the flashlight around the two's surroundings.

"What," she questioned, sarcastically, "do you recognize the mold on the walls?"

Logan, at a loss for a retort, blew a raspberry at the nonconformist. The two had been bantering for the majority of the journey, but when it came to verbal insults it was rather clear who the victor was.

"Oh, hey," Logan noted. "That's new."

"What is it?" Lacey asked. Logan pointed to an inscription on the wall, written in crude handwriting: _"CC WUZ HERE."_

"Who's CC?" Logan wondered.

Lacey shrugged. "Maybe it stands for something. Come on, let's keep moving."

**(Confession Cam: We 'wuz' **_**nowhere**_**. Honestly!)**

** Logan—**"Seriously! What does CC stand for? It's been all day and I still haven't thought of anything!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Moving through the sewers, as well)**

"Man, this water is freezing!" Damion exclaimed, frowning as he and Bren moved forwards, into a drop-off that made the water climb a few inches higher than their ankles. He lifted his leg out of the water and shook it for a moment.

Bren sighed. "Sorry, we're gonna have to tough it out for…however long this maze is. I wonder if it covers the whole island?"

Damion groaned. "I sure hope not. I think I'm close to losing all feeling in my legs…at least I won't feel the cold, anymore." Bren chuckled.

"If you get hypothermia, I promise I'll carry you to the exit," Bren declared.

Damion grinned. "I appreciate that." The two froze in fear, though, when the flashlight flickered off and stayed off.

Bren could hear a sloshing noise, but he figured it was Damion hopping up and down in distress.

"Oh my God we're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna diiiiiieeee_…_" Damion was chanting. Bren decided to take a very direct approach, and began hitting the flashlight. Eventually, the flashlight flicked on again. Bren waved it around a bit, and thankfully, the flashlight stayed on. The two boys sighed in relief.

Bren moved it to their intended path, but then his face fell when he saw two giant reptilian creatures advancing towards the duo. Turns out _they_ were the sloshing noise he had heard.

"Crocodiles?" Damion squeaked.

Bren shook his head. "Alligators…"

Damion took a nervous step back. "At this point, does it matter?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Getting the safe combo)**

Zane had gone through the same instructions that Riley had (although his informative session had involved much more hugging and spontaneous rants than he cared for). He now was wandering the party, unsure what to do.

He ended up taking a seat at a table that faced a nearby stage. Some musical comedy routine was going on—Zane was having trouble focusing on it, but at the moment there was some man with a pillow stuffed down his shirt singing "I Will Survive", and occasionally jumping onto innocent diners' tables to dance. **(1)**

Seeing this, Zane decided to stay a safe distance away.

He sat there for a few minutes, and then jumped in surprise when a few newcomers took seats with him.

There was a young man with short, messy black hair, and brown eyes. The other newcomer was a girl with long, dark brown hair, and red streaks.

"I'm Charity," the girl introduced herself, with a grin. "And this is Allister," she added, gesturing to the boy sitting next to her. "You're Zane, right?"

Zane nodded. "Nice to meet you two."

Allister's expression remained somewhat apathetic. "Likewise…look…we were wondering if you could tell us what's going on."

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," Zane lied.

Charity rolled her eyes, showily. "Oh, come off it. You and Miss Riley are wandering around this party with outfits that look like they came from the discount bin at a Halloween shop!" Charity laughed. "And why are you wearing sunglasses indoors? It's looks rather…ridiculous."

Zane couldn't help but chuckle, thinking of Riley warning him to 'not diss the stunna shades'.

"Hm…" Zane looked away from the two, for a moment. "I mean, you guys surely know there's a challenge going on, right?"

Allister nodded. "Of course. But nobody bothered to tell us what you and Riley would be trying to do here. We don't like being kept in the dark."

"In a _figurative_ sense, of course," Charity piped up. Grinning, she added, "Gothic stereotypes and whatnot."

"Are you even allowed to ask?" Zane questioned.

"Err…" Uncomfortably, Charity cleared her throat. "Not…really."

"Sorry, then," Zane apologized, standing up, and scooting his chair back. "I'm afraid I can't tell you anything. But inadvertently, you just helped me, so thank you for that." With that said, Zane walked away from the two, now knowing that neither of them knew the combo.

Charity and Allister exchanged glances, and Charity turned her head towards Zane.

"…you're welcome?" Charity replied awkwardly.

All the while, a pair of eyes watched Zane's every move…

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Catching Chris)**

Seth allowed the boat to drift to a stop, and he and Kit-Kat jumped onto a nearby dock that jutted out into the water. Not far behind was Zarya, who arrived to the scene only moments after Kit-Kat and Seth ran off towards where they were certain they had seen Chris.

"This lake is bigger than I thought!" Seth said to Kit-Kat. "That boat ride took quite a while, at least, a lot longer than I thought it would…"

"This might get difficult," Kit-Kat murmured. The two of them were running to the top of a steep hill. "If there are more woods at the end of this hill, then we might be wandering around for a while."

Seth nodded. "True. We shouldn't assume the worst, though…"

The two arrived to the top of the hill, then, and gaped at what they saw.

It was a small town, bustling with life. Kit-Kat and Seth were all too aware of how easily Chris could slip in the masses of cars, buildings, and people.

"So…" Kit-Kat began, nervously, "where should we begin?"

Hopelessly, Seth gave the town a sweeping glance, and then smiled a little bit. "How about the bakery?"

Kit-Kat shrugged. "Sounds good to me."

The two went off.

Not a second later, Zarya arrived to the top of the hill, and watched Seth and Kit-Kat take off. She glanced at the town for a while, then focused on a sign in the distance…and sprinted off as well.

She had a feeling she was going to regret what she was about to do.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Going through the laser maze)**

"You're doing _great_!" Jess shouted, so abruptly that Rosetta nearly fell over.

"Jeez!" Rosetta gasped, a hair's breadth from her nose getting acquainted with a laser. "Warn me before you decide to go cheerleader on me!"

"Sorry!" Jess apologized. "Just making sure you're motivated!" Rosetta was about three-fourths across the maze, and Jess was watching and making commentary that amused, distracted, and at many points, annoyed Rosetta.

"So what do you think these lasers do?" Rosetta questioned, as she limboed under one laser and tip-toed over another. "Trigger an alarm or chop off an appendage?"

"Well, I'm rooting for the former," Jess called out, "but personally, I'd recommend not touching one!"

"Thanks for the advice!" Rosetta called back, sarcastically. After a minute or two, she reached the end, towards the arrow that was behind a ladder that led to their next destination. "Oh, phew…"

"What is it?" Jess asked.

"I thought this might be the case…" Rosetta mused. "This arrow, it's another button. I think if I push it the lasers will turn off and you can walk right through to the other side of this room."

"You think…?" Jess repeated, uncertainly.

Rosetta shrugged. "Well, I don't know. It could just as easily make this room explode or release the hounds or something."

"Well if those are the stakes…let's give it a shot!" Jess cheered. Rosetta smirked, and pushed the button. The lasers flicked off, and the lights turned on.

"Come on," Rosetta instructed, waving Jess over to the ladder that would lead them up to the next level. "Time for round two…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Also in the laser maze)**

"Jeez, you're slow…" Lola muttered, as Jack struggled over a particularly difficult part of the maze.

"Now that's just hypocritical," Jack complained, as he gingerly navigated forwards. "At least I'm _going_ through this damn maze!"

"From the looks of it, you're the only one who _needs_ to," Lola pointed out, calmly. "The way mazes like these work is that one button turns the lasers on, and another, on the opposite end of the room, turns them off. That giant, glaring arrow is almost certainly the button."

Jack gave her a curious expression. "How do you know that?"

Lola shrugged, innocently. "You don't get to my status without knowing some things."

"How incredibly vague," Jack noted, dryly. "It's refreshing, really."

"Unorthodox, even," Lola agreed, grinning widely, now. "I like to think I bring something new to the show."

Jack gave her a surprised look, and raised his eyebrow, cautiously. "Are you seriously poking fun at yourself?"

Lola waved him off, dismissively. "Don't get used to it. Chop-chop, now, move your sorry butt to the end of the maze, already."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Held captive by the mysterious gray person)**

Arlen continued staring at the identity-revealed 'gray person' with disbelief.

"What are you doing here," he questioned, "…Laura?"

Laura chuckled, and began circling the two.

"I'm here for the challenge, of course," she replied. "And I didn't come alone…" A second person, also clothed in gray, walked up to Arlen and Aaron and removed his/her/its mask as well.

"Hey guys!" Demi greeted cheerfully. "Sorry about the _tied-up_ thing…"

Aaron gave Arlen a speculative look. "This is probably the weirdest duo of villains ever…" He turned his gaze towards the two ladies. "Why are you two working together?"

"Like Laura said, it's part of the challenge," Demi replied. "The whole gray-outfit thing is actually a reference to Spy vs. Spy. But, that's irrelevant. I'm sure you want to hear what the challenge is." The two boys nodded. "Alright, then. In a moment here we're going to leave and a recording is going to say…err…something. A piece of information, we're not sure what it is.

"When we return," Demi continued, "we're going to 'interrogate' you guys in order to have you spill your guts."

"What?" Arlen yelped, alarmed.

"It's a figure of speech," Laura pointed out, rolling her eyes. "The first person to slip up loses the challenge."

"So…they're _giving_ us information to keep secret?" Aaron affirmed. "Err…why?"

"Because clearly," Laura replied, "you two know nothing."

Arlen couldn't help but give the girls a sly grin. "I can't help but wonder what your interrogation methods might be…"

Laura narrowed her eyes. "Don't even think about it, Casanova."

"Personally," Arlen added, still grinning, "in a situation like this…I think you could refer to me as _Bond_."

"_James_ Bond," Aaron added, laughing to himself. "So…why _you two_ for the interrogation?"

"It's nothing personal," Demi assured him. Laura scoffed.

"It's _completely_ personal," she corrected Demi. "These guys voted us off. This our regulated revenge, per se."

"I didn't even vote for you, though!" Arlen exclaimed in objection. "You were too hot!"

"Flattery won't work!" Demi warned, but then groaned and slapped her forehead once she saw Laura grinning at Arlen, alluringly.

"_Won't _it, Laura?" Demi continued, monotonously. Laura jumped up, and took a step back.

"_Riiight_," she said, nodding slowly. "Not at all. Nope."

"I'm sure," Arlen continued, hopefully, "between two dashing gentlemen and two beautiful women…we can work something out, right?" Demi chuckled darkly, and began to lead Laura out of the room.

"Sorry, Arlen…" the Goth called out, as they disappeared around the corner. "This interrogation is happening."

"Damn," Arlen grumbled to himself.

"I wonder what that valuable piece of information might be," Aaron mused. Soon after, a recording began to ring out through the room they were in.

_"Greetings, hopeless victims!" _Unsurprisingly, the voice was Chris's.

"What an unpleasant way to put it," observed Aaron.

_"Listen closely, you two. You're actually going to get the same piece of information, so the first one to reveal the secret will lose. Here's the secret…and let me assure, you," _Chris began chuckling, evilly. _"It's a BIG one…"_

Arlen and Aaron widened their eyes as Chris's recorded voice told them a rather surprising piece of information.

**(Confession Cam: Here's all, and yet absolutely nothing…)**

**Aaron—**"Okay! I did not expect _that_."

**Arlen—**"Holy Jesus on a pogo stick. The others…they aren't gonna like that."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Paintball shootout)**

The door to the mess hall creaked open as Chelsea sneaked in, her gun held closely to her body. The island was a ghost town; Chelsea had scoured every inch of the place…except for in here. Unless Long was moving continually on the run, it was clear that this was his hiding place.

Chelsea whipped around the seemingly deserted mess hall, grinning maniacally. "I know you're in here, Long…olly olly oxen free…"

She wheeled around violently when she heard the sound of feet dropping behind her—only to see Long pointed the barrel of his paintball gun right at her.

"Drop the gun," Long warned.

Chelsea looked up, surprised. "You were hiding in the rafters? Gotta act like a crazy girl to catch a crazy girl, I suppose…"

Long nodded at this, but then grew serious again, as he repeated, "Drop the gun, Chelsea…"

Chelsea pondered this for an unusually long amount of time before responding. "_No_."

The two campers stood there, in the middle of the mess hall, pointing guns at each other for a very long amount of time, neither of them willing to start shooting.

"It seems we've reached an impasse…" Chelsea noted.

"Are you two going to start shooting each other anytime soon?" The cameraman asked.

"Doesn't look like it…" Long replied, his eyes not leaving Chelsea's trigger finger.

"Is it okay if I get a snack, then?" Questioned the cameraman, hopefully.

"Sure thing," Chelsea replied, jerking her head sideways, towards the kitchen. "The door should be unlocked."

"Thanks." The cameraman scurried off. "I'll be back in ten minutes!"

"Sounds like a plan," Long agreed.

The two campers continued staring each other down.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Escaping from the cage)**

"Mo! Look at dis!" Glisa exclaimed, waving Mo over to the side of the cage she was standing on. On the ground near the shark tank was a large red button with a square on it. "Dat button might stop da cage from hitting the water!"

"Well that's…certainly convenient," Mo commented, slowly. "Think we can hit it from here? Will this," he held up the mini harpoon, "actually do anything to it?"

"It's worth a shot," Glisa replied. She paused for a moment. "Aye…darn those unintentional puns…!"

Mo lifted his watch and twisted the knob that had shot out the first harpoon. Another harpoon went flying out of the side, and managed to hit a shark on the head (it bounced off it, harmlessly).

Glisa watched the spectacle with mingled worry and amusement. "Did dat shark just flip you off…?"

Flustered, Mo took off the watch and handed it to Glisa. "_You_ try it!"

Glisa shrugged. "_Algo seguro_!" She aimed the watch best as she could, and turned the knob. A mini harpoon went sailing between the bars of the jail and out a nearby window and far, far away.

Glisa awkwardly set the watch down. "Dat's not as easy as it looks, _hombre_…"

Mo gave her a helpless look. "What do we do now?"

Glisa gave him an equally as hopeless look. "We're _twisted_!"

Mo gave her a funny look. "You mean 'screwed'?"

"And screwed, yes! Dat too!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Escaping from the cage)**

Sienna wrung her hands as she paced around the cage. She stopped at the door of the cage and rattled it, experimentally. It didn't budge, but this wasn't a surprise. She could see the huge lock on the other side.

"The cage will fall apart once it hits water…" She repeated to herself. She eyed the cage that was clearly made out of metal, and sighed to herself about 'nonsensical cartoon physics'. Then, epiphany struck her like a keyboard to the head.

"Yo, Chef!" She shouted, cupping her hands around her mouth. "Am I supposed to break off part of the cage with water, by any chance?"

_"Finally!" _Chef groaned, sounding groggy. _"Took ya long enough…"_

"Okay, but…" Sienna chuckled, awkwardly. "I'm still stuck. Where do I get water? Besides the water in the tank, because I don't think I'll _like_ it down there," she hinted, heavily sarcastic.

_"Gotta brainstorm, girly…" _Chef yawned.

"I could do a rain dance," Sienna offered, still very sardonic.

_"Wrong," _Chef sighed.

"Start a fire?"

_"Interesting idea…but you don't have any matches and this place doesn't have a sprinkler system for fires."_

"Okay, then. Got any…water balloons around here?"

_"No. You're getting warmer."_

Sienna rubbed the side of her head. "Water…guns? Is there a water gun in here…?" She searched around, but saw nothing. "Oh, come on. There are only so many places you can hide a…" she stopped talking, frowned, and knelt down next to her purse. "Don't tell me…" she looted through it for a moment, and pulled out a nicely-sized water gun. "You went through my purse?"

_"To give ya the damn gun!" _Chef grumbled in response. Sienna flipped through her wallet, experimentally, and gnashed her teeth together.

"I'm missing twenty bucks!"

_"The…ah…eels must've eaten it…"_

"Oh can it, Hatchet," Sienna growled, as she raised the water gun and aimed it at the door. "Let's hope this works…" she got up, very close to the door, and pressed the trigger, releasing a steady shot of water. It hit the lock, and the lock broke off from the door and fell. After spraying the door, and kicking it, it detached from the cage and fell too.

"Great," Sienna sighed, as she stood in the gap where the door had been. She was still at least fifty feet from the ground. "What do I do now…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Getting the safe combo)**

A very unhappy Riley slunk down into a seat on a green felt table. She had gotten no sign of the combo—or maybe she had, and she didn't even notice. The night was definitely not going well.

"Rough challenge, mon?" Asked an ex-camper who was sitting at the table. He was a friendly looking guy with black skin, dreadlocks, brown eyes, a wide grin, and a T-shirt with jeans.

Riley chuckled. "You have no idea…"

Another ex-camper—a ponytail-wearing brunette with brown eyes, a pink sweatshirt, and a smirk—raised an eyebrow at the comment. "Ah, don't be so sure. Don't forget, we've gone through this, too. The unnecessary drama…"

"The ridiculous challenges," the Jamaican added.

"The dodge balls…" sighed another, who was shuffling a deck of cards. He was a bespectacled, awkward looking fellow, with pale skin, spiky brown hair, and hazel eyes.

"Dodge balls?" Riley repeated, confusedly.

"Touchy subject," laughed an auburn-haired girl sitting next to the Jamaican. She had big blue eyes and looked just as friendly as the Jamaican she sat next to.

"So, what're we playing?" Riley questioned.

"Now, we're playing five-card draw," the one shuffling the deck replied. "We just finished playing blackjack…"

"Easy enough," Riley mused.

"By the way," the brunette girl spoke up. "My name's Ashlynn. He," she pointed to the Jamaican, "is Marley Thomas…but somehow everybody ended up calling him Thomas. She," she pointed to the redhead, "is Rachel. And he," she put an arm around the shuffler, making the latter blush profusely, "is Raphael!"

"Nice to meet you guys," Riley replied, pleasantly. "I'm Riley. Hence the…really large sign out front…" she cleared her throat, uneasily.

The five of them continued chatting as Raphael passed out the cards.

"Oh, by the way," Rachel spoke up. "This might make it less…interesting, but we're not betting money, if that's all right with you."

"Perfectly fine by me," Riley assured her. "I haven't got a penny to my name. I used to have forty-two cents to my name…but we had this stash for Chris Bingo today, and…I'm…not…making any sense. Shutting up now." She swiped up her cards but then frowned. "Err, Raphael? Sorry, but you accidentally only passed me four cards…"

The cards she had in her hand right now were, to put it lightly, complete crap. She had a king of spades, a queen of hearts, a three of diamonds, and a two of clubs.

Riley blinked a few times, and then smiled brightly at Raphael.

"Oh, sorry," Raphael apologized. He passed her another card from the top of the deck. "There you go." Riley picked the card up, and Thomas placed his (imaginary) bet, Rachel called it, and Riley set down her cards.

"I fold," she sighed, as she pushed back from her table. "I'm gonna go get something to eat…" All the while, her mind was running wildly: _King and queen: face cards. So the first two numbers are 10. Then 3 and 2. 32. The combo must be 10-10-32._

Back at the poker table, Ashlynn nodded and winked at Raphael.

"That was clever, mon," Thomas noted, smiling in approval.

"Wait," Raphael questioned, "I thought you guys weren't supposed to know about…"

"The two giant safes placed in dead sight through those doors?" Rachel questioned. "Yes…we saw them. Don't worry; we're not after them, though. That's up to…" she chuckled. "Well, you know who…"

Ashlynn pivoted in her wheeling chair, appraising Raphael with mock seriousness, and slapped her hand of cards down onto the table. "Now explain to me how you pulled off _that_ card trick," she gestured towards Riley's hand of cards, "but you passed me the _biggest_ load of _crap_..."

"Heh…" Raphael laughed nervously, as he began gathering up the cards—even the ones that were still in Rachel and Thomas's hands, much to their confusion. "How about a game of Go Fish…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Through the sewer maze)**

"This is starting to get a little frustrating," Lacey muttered to herself. She and Logan had yet to find the exit and Lacey's patience (both with the situation and with Logan himself) was starting to dwindle.

"I thought Chef said there'd be surprises down here," Logan complained. "This challenge is so freaking _boring_…"

"I don't think it's supposed to _be_ all that terribly exciting," Lacey replied, half-heartedly. "I'm pretty sure they designed it just to bug the crap out of us, test our patience and—"

"This challenge is pissing me off!" Logan exploded, cutting Lacey off. "I'm ready to just…frickin'…tear something apart!"

Lacey suddenly froze in her tracks, and chuckled nervously. "How about some crocodiles?" Far in the distance, large reptiles were beginning to make their way towards the two of them.

"Alligators!" corrected a faraway voice. Lacey squinted, and saw that Damion and Bren were running away from the alligators.

"Oh crap," Lacey muttered. "Let's go—we've got to help them!" She took of running towards the scene, not waiting for Logan's reply.

"Not very villainous," Logan grumbled, but shrugged, as he followed. "Can't pass off the opportunity to kick the crap out of something, though…"

Lacey arrived to the two heroes and began running with them as soon as a thought occurred to her.

"Does that bop-them-on-the-nose thing really work?" She questioned the two boys, awkwardly.

**(Confession Cam: Wait…what season are we on…?)**

** Harold—**_(Gives the camera a thumbs up.) _"It vanquishes all foes!"

()()()()()()()()()

"I can't really think of a better idea!" Bren shouted between gasps of breath for air.

"Besides running, you mean?" Damion questioned.

"Yeah," Bren groaned.

"Alright, then," Lacey said firmly. She wheeled around, and began running backwards for a bit. "Here's the plan—"

"LEEEEEROY JEEEEENKINS!" Logan howled, flying through the air and tackling one of the alligators. A variety of noises ensued, and in seconds, the alligator was scurrying away in fear. Logan whooped and punched a fist in the air.

The second alligator had gotten close to the Lacey-Bren-Damion trio, and Lacey gritted her teeth together, brandishing her flashlight, until…

Something went whizzing through the air, and hit the alligator straight on the nose. It deflected off of it without any harm, but the alligator ran away, bawling.

"What the heck just happened?" Lacey questioned. Receiving no answer, she walked over to the object that had hit the alligator. She held it up, and her confusion only grew. "A mini harpoon…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

** (Back at the cage)**

"Hey, I think dat shot was closer!" Glisa exclaimed, still messing with the watch. Nearby, Mo sat with his face buried in his hands.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Catching Chris)**

"I'm serious," Seth laughed, as he and Kit-Kat brushed through the streets of the small town they were in. "The guy saved his own life by body-surfing in _molasses_…" **(2)**

"A flood of molasses, though?" Kit-Kat chuckled. "That has got to be a horrible way to go! You'd think you'd be able to get away from something that moves so slow…"

"I guess if you have enough of anything it'll move pretty fast," Seth mused. Suddenly, Seth stopped in the middle of the street.

"What's up?" Kit-Kat questioned, stopping as well.

"Hear that noise?" Seth questioned. Kit-Kat frowned, focusing as well. "It sounds like…" Kit-Kat heard it now, too, a deep rumbling in the distance. Seth turned around, and widened his eyes in terror. "Oh, God. _Fan girls_."

A squealing mass of teenagers began rampaging down the street, straight towards Kit-Kat and Seth. The two campers yelped, and ran to the sidewalk, out of the wake of the pre-teen madness. The teens were wearing shirts with Chris McLean on them, holding signs, and shouting some nonsensical fan-girl-ish gibberish.

What shocked and confused Kit-Kat and Seth even more was the person being carried by all these people, all the while shouting instructions and carrying a megaphone.

"Is that…?" Kit-Kat began.

"I think it is…" Seth agreed, nodding, wide-eyed.

"Yes, ladies, Chris McLean is somewhere in this town!" Zarya announced from the shoulders of the fan-girls. "And, if you find him…I've heard that he's also giving away the number to Duncan's cell phone!" This riled the girls up even more and they continued their maddening rampage down the street.

Kit-Kat and Seth exchanged glances, and then sprinted after the mob.

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(The interrogation)**

Laura and Demi re-entered the room, circling the two boys with malevolent grins.

"Demi, c'mon, now," Aaron pleaded, nervously. "You don't really consider yourself the villainous type, do you?"

Demi stopped in her tracks, and shrugged.

"Not really," she admitted, "but this sounded like too much fun to pass up."

"Ah, but you've already given away your biggest secret…" Arlen noted, eerily.

Laura crossed her arms. "And, dare I ask, what is our 'biggest secret'?"

Arlen smirked, looking triumphant. "You told us you can't hurt us already! You took away the whole scary-ish part of an interrogation!"

Laura frowned, glancing at Demi. "I thought he was supposed to be the stupid one."

"Oh, we have other things planned," Demi commented. She walked to a corner of the room and flung a burlap sack over her shoulder.

"Ooh, presents!" Aaron exclaimed, excitedly.

Demi dropped the sack in front of the two and pulled out a water gun.

Arlen raised an eyebrow. "A water gun?" Demi responded to that by shooting the gun at him, firing a (surprisingly strong) stream of water at him that made him splutter. After about ten seconds of that Demi stopped firing and Arlen shivered.

"Okay," he noted, "that was…irritating…but not all that—" Demi pressed the trigger again and Arlen continued spluttering.

Laura grinned. "This is fun."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Going past the laser maze)**

"Aaaand…here goes spy cliché numero _dos_…" Rosetta observed, as she and Jess disappeared up the hole in the ceiling. "The escape through the air vents." She and Jess scurried up the hole in the ceiling and began crawling through the limited space the air vents gave them.

"It's kinda funny," Jess mused, as they continued crawling. "The air vent thing is so freaking cliché, and apparently the vents wouldn't be able to hold up a grown man, anyways. Not to mention, the air vents are always so conveniently placed whenever a hero is trapped…" she chuckled to herself.

"I wouldn't recommend talking about the fallibility of an air vent," Rosetta warned.

"Why is that?" Jess asked.

"Because whenever someone talks about how something doesn't work, it starts to not work. In our case, we would probably fall through the air vent."

The two girls, worried, stopped crawling for a moment.

Much to Rosetta's surprise, they didn't fall.

"There's a first…" she murmured to herself.

The two girls resumed their escapade, and Jess finally couldn't resist the temptation to ask the question that had been on her mind for a long portion of the challenge:

"Rosetta…did you and Riley break up?"

Rosetta stopped crawling, but continued after a moment.

"Yeah," she said, after a long time of silent traversing. "We did. We met sometime before the campfire ceremony. It…it didn't go well."

"I'm…I'm sorry, Rosetta," Jess apologized.

"No, it's fine," Rosetta said quickly, her tone very assuring. "I don't…I shouldn't be with Riley, he's not _nice_. He's smart and egotistical…a really bad combination. The bad outweighs the good. He's just not good for me."

"Well, good for you!" Jess told Rosetta, pleasantly. "If he's not good for you then you shouldn't be with him. Simple as that. But breakups…they can be hard. How do you feel?"

Rosetta held up a hand and flexed her fingers. "With these babies."

Jess rolled her eyes. "I'm serious."

Rosetta laughed. "I'm really not that bad…a little cynical—as you may have noticed—but…I'm feeling better, actually. Thanks Jess."

Jess grinned. "Glad to help."

The two girls reached an area in the vent in which the vent went straight up, as opposed to the inclines that they had crawled up before. The vent was quite a bit wider here, so the two girls could actually stand up in the area.

"How do you propose we handle this?" Jess questioned, appraising the new scenario that faced them.

"We could do it the _Emperor's New Groove_ way," Rosetta suggested. "Press our backs together and slowly walk up."

"Would that really work?" Jess asked.

Rosetta gave her a look. "We just climbed through an _air vent_—"

Jess waved a hand, dismissively. "Yeah, yeah, I realized that was stupid. Never mind. Let's do this thing."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Also in an air vent)**

"I hope the path here is straight-forward," Jack commented. "This would probably be the worst place to have a maze." (The campers in the sewer were suddenly annoyed with Jack, although they weren't sure why.)

"I just hope that this is the last part of the challenge for us," Lola groaned.

"No offense—but you haven't had to do much this challenge," Jack pointed out. "You've _walked across a room_."

"Shut up or I'll tell the villains how excellent you are with _cartwheels_."

"My mom signed me up for that gymnastics class, okay?"

A rumbling noise suddenly interrupted the two. It was relatively quiet at first, but then multiplied in intensity, substantially.

"That's not a _good_ noise…" Jack noted, slowly.

And indeed it wasn't.

The air vent began to fall apart, and Jack and Lola screamed as the crashed to the ground.

"Ugh…" Jack groaned, clutching his head as he sat upright. The two of them were back to the first level—the room that the laser maze had been in. He turned his head to see Lola still lying on the ground, groaning in pain. Jack ran to her side and helped her up. "Lola! Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," the queen bee muttered, as she brushed herself off. "Don't do that, it creeps me out."

"Uh…_I'm_ not the one who made the air vents commit suicide."

"That's not what I meant!" Lola exploded. Jack gave her a quizzical look.

"Err…you mean…don't be nice?"

"_Yes_. It creeps me out."

Jack was about to respond, but a robotic voice suddenly boomed over the room.

_"Challenge over. Loser = very yes," _it announced. **(3)**

Lola raised an eyebrow. "I'm gonna assume that means we lost…"

"Probably," Jack sighed. "Rosetta and Jess must've reached the top before us. Let's head back and hope the others are doing well…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Getting the combo)**

Zane was not doing well.

His 'white-spy' pal, Riley, was no where to be seen—and it wasn't too hard to deduct that she had figured out the combo. So he was stuck in a room with slightly-psychotic ex-campers, desperate to get the combo to a safe that held…something.

Quite the lovely time.

Sighing, he walked up to the bar and ordered a Coke.

"How many would you like, good sir?" asked the bartender, a friendly, laid-back looking guy with black hair and brown eyes.

"Just one, please," Zane replied, resting his chin in his hand. "But keep them coming…'

"Ten cokes, you said?" asked the bartender (whose name—just throwing it out there—was Kevin).

"No…" Zane said slowly, raising an eyebrow. "One for now."

"Ten?" Kevin repeated.

"One!" Zane shot back, somewhat annoyed, now.

"Thirty-two?"

"Well, thirty-two plus ten is the meaning of life but that's…really irrelevant," Zane muttered. "I'll just be going." The loner walked up and stormed away, until a small, but unmistakable smile broke out on his face.

_10-10-32, huh? Let's try this out…_

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Catching Chris)**

Chris McLean chuckled, leaning back in his chair as he happily relaxed on the patio of a restaurant near the beach. He figured he'd have a _long_ time before…

The air became suddenly still, and Chris raised an eyebrow.

He knew that rumbling noise all too well…

"Oh, crap," Chris muttered, jumping up and nearly falling out of his chair. "Fan girls…" he could hear the screaming above the rumbling now, and it was too late for Chris. The girls arrived to the scene and tackled Chris to the ground before he had a chance to run.

Zarya peered at Chris. "Does this count as you being 'caught'?"

"Yes!" Chris shouted. "Just get them away from here!"

Zarya raised an eyebrow, and Chris quickly added:

"Please!"

Zarya smirked, then, and brandished her megaphone. "Gladly."

We'd rather not repeat the things Zarya shouted through the megaphone—but it definitely got the fan girls away from the scene.

After the rather frightening cursing streak, a breathless Kit-Kat and Seth arrived to the two of them.

"Too late?" Kit-Kat guessed.

Chris nodded.

"Darn it!" Seth sighed, and then—"OW!" he knelt down and grabbed the object that had struck him in the head. "Where on Earth did a tiny harpoon come from?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Escaping from the cage)**

"Let's…let's just try something else," Mo suggested, half-heartedly, as he struggled to pull the watch away from Glisa who was still shooting harpoons with a rather frightening determination.

Another accidental harpoon was shot, and it landed on the far side of the cage. Mo walked over and picked it up, and went to the door. He reached his hand outside the gaps of the bars, and stuck the harpoon in the lock's keyhole. He fiddled around with it for a bit, until the lock broke off and fell into the water.

Mo kicked the door and it fell off as well. "C'mon, we have to jump!" They were frighteningly close to the water. Glisa nodded, and the two held their breath, took a few steps back, and jumped…

They managed to land on the concrete surrounding the tank—and they were only a few inches away from landing in the tank itself. Despite this success, a huge, buzzing noise rang out.

"_Sorry!" _said Chef, through the intercom. _"Y'all were too dang slow! Sienna already escaped her cage…a long time ago!"_

"What?" Mo questioned, in disbelief. "But…how?"

(**Hey, it's a flashback!)**

_Sienna gritted her teeth. She was still too far up to jump, but she didn't want to wait too long. Glisa and Mo could escape any second._

_ "Hey, Chef…" Sienna called out, cautiously, as she stood in the gap of the cage where the door once was. "Are you watching this as well as listening?"_

_ "Yeah, yeah…" Chef mumbled, sounding tired. _

_ Sienna raised an eyebrow, and slowly walked back towards her purse. "If you close the top of the tank and lower the cage, I'll give you twenty bucks." All the while, she waved the bill in the air._

_ "Hm…" Chef sounded tempted._

_ "Aaaand…" Sienna added, quickly. "And I'll add…err…" she continued looting through her purse. "Raspberry lip balm?"_

_ "DEAL!" Chef shouted, so abruptly that Sienna jumped in surprise. The tank closed and Sienna was flung down so quickly, she didn't have time to ponder on how very, very odd that just was._

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Opening the safe!)**

Riley crept down the long hallway that was behind the door she had gone through. At the very end of it, a fat gray safe sat, with the Total Drama Island logo stamped onto it. Smiling triumphantly, Riley quickened her pace, excited at the chance at victory.

Once she reached the safe, she knelt down and entered the combo. She wrapped her hands around the safe's handle, and pulled. To her relief and excitement, the safe opened up with ease. To her confusion, there was nothing but an envelope in the safe.

"Ah ah ah…" A voice warned, chuckling darkly, from behind her. Shocked, Riley whipped her head around.

Riley blinked, slowly, and her expression grew perplexed.

"Courtney?" The gamer questioned.

The newcomer groaned, stomping her foot. "I'm not Courtney! I'm her twin sister, Doerenda! Doe for short," the brunette added, smiling cheerfully.

Riley tilted her head, slowly standing up and sneaking the envelope in her back pocket, stealthily. "You were the winner from your season!"

"Yeah, I was!" Doe replied, grinning. "That was pretty freaking cool. But, ah…you're gonna need to hand over that envelope…or else!"

Riley raised an eyebrow. "Or else what?"

Doe hesitated. "I didn't really get that far."

"Huh," Riley mused. An awkward silence reigned, and then Riley desperately took off running, only to have Doe lightly stick out a foot and have Riley trip over it.

"Well that was anticlimactic," Riley observed.

"Yeah, I don't suppose—" Doe began, but Riley scampered up again and continued running towards the door, and Doe continued running after her. "_Get back here_!"

Riley burst through the door, to the party outside. As a last ditch effort, she tossed the fedora towards Doe's face, but her aim was a tad off and she only managed to land it on Kenny's head—who looked at it with mild amusement.

"Whoo!" Riley cheered, throwing her arms up at the sight of where the hat landed. "_Fifty points_—oh crap," she groaned, as Doe continued towards her.

"I didn't want to do this, but…" Doe sighed wistfully, as she reached for something behind her back.

A bright red dodge ball.

Riley raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

Doe grinned. "What can I say? We were a 'slapstick' sort of season."

Riley ducked as the dodge ball sailed towards her, only to rebound off of the wall and hit the unfortunate Raphael in the head. From the table he was sitting at it, Ashlynn gave him a sympathetic look.

"You okay?" She asked him.

Raphael kept his forehead plastered to the tabletop. "I'll be better when that joke finally dies."

"Sorry dude," Thomas chuckled. "We're beating that dead horse."

"We're beatin' it _good_," Rachel added, nodding, wide-eyed.

Meanwhile, as Riley attempted to stand up again, Doe jumped down and snatched the envelope out of her pocket.

"Yes!" The brunette cheered, and then apologetically, "Sorry, Riley…but yes! I got it!" And she ran away, cackling her head off.

Riley sighed, and looked towards Kenny. "Can I have my fedora back?" The fedora sailed towards her and landed on her head, sliding down over her eyes. "Thanks."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Opening the safe, too)**

Zane couldn't help but hurry the 'opening' process as soon as he heard the commotion from outside the door. He swung the safe door open and snatched the envelope…only to hear the sound of footsteps approaching.

He turned around.

"Effie," Zane said, surprised. "You're…betraying me?"

Effie laughed insanely. "Betrayal is a necessity of all spy movies, my bespectacled buddy! I'm just fulfilling the status quo, here!"

Zane gave her an inquisitive look. "But your stereotype for the show…aren't the 'crazy' ones supposed to go _against_ the flow?"

Effie regarded this, before replying, "I'm fulfilling a minority, really. Villains are in short supply!"

Zane had no angles left to hit. "You're…a trifle insane."

Effie winked. "More than that, my friend. Now…prepare to face the wrath of Trogdor, kumquats, and guyliner…all combined!" As Zane wondered what those things might have in common, Effie began reaching for something in her pocket, but her evil expression grew panicked when she couldn't find the thing she was searching for.

Zane smiled coldly. "I thought it might come to this, Effie. When you tackled me in our first meeting, _this_ fell out of your oversized pockets." He pulled out a Nerf gun and wielded it just about as threateningly as someone could wield a Nerf gun.

"'Oversized pockets' is a funny phrase…" Effie giggled, and then, anguished, "You _took_ my _Nerf gun_?" Zane nodded, triumphantly. "Too bad for you…" Effie reached behind her and pulled out what was probably the biggest freaking Nerf gun Zane had ever seen. "I always come prepared!"

Zane looked from his tiny gun, to hers, back to his again…and then ran like hell down the hallway. Flailing his arms like a madman, he burst through the door and ran through the party room while the other ex-campers just sighed at having to go through a chase scene again.

Effie emerged from the door not long after, shooting her Nerf gun, hollering, and chasing after Zane. Zane ran through the party scene, and pushed open the door that had led to where he and Riley entered. He peered through the window and grew fearful when he didn't see any boat miraculously attached to the window.

"Yo, Zane!" Riley called out, from the water. Zane lowered his gaze and saw that Riley was already on the boat. "Jump!"

Zane clambered through, about to do so, when Effie soon burst through the doorway, firing shots at Zane. A burst of fire flew over Zane's head, and Zane screamed in pure terror as a shower of sparks fell on his head. He proceeded to fall into the lake, only to be hoisted in the boat by Riley.

Zane looked back up towards the window, where Effie stuck her head out.

"What kind of Nerf gun was _that_?" Zane screamed.

Effie grinned. "I modified it myself!"

Riley began driving the boat away before Effie could say anything else.

"That was…quite a challenge," Riley remarked.

Zane slapped his forehead. "I dislike those people."

"Well, at least now we get to go back to _our _season's annoying campers," Riley reminded him cheerfully. "So what's in the envelope from the safe?" Zane took the envelope out and opened it. Inside, there was a letter.

"_Stock tip_," Zane read, "_buy TJ Maxx_." Riley and Zane exchanged glances, and then Zane sighed and tossed the stock tip over his shoulder.

"Well, it might be a while before we find Camp Wawanakwa," Riley laughed. "C'mon, we can do some _bonding _on the trip back."

Zane raised an eyebrow. "And what might that entail?"

"Like…err…" Riley hesitated. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Zane licked his finger and snuffed out a lock of hair that was still smoldering. "Alive."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

As Zane and Riley arrived to the Wawanakwa shore, other boats were arriving as well. One with Chris, one with Kit-Kat and Seth, one with Zarya, one with Jess and Rosetta, and one with Jack and Lola.

"Where did all these speedboats come from?" Seth wondered aloud, as he and Kit-Kat hopped out of the boat.

"I always did wonder about the source of Chris's…junk," Kit-Kat agreed. She turned towards Rosetta and Jess. "How'd your challenge go?"

"We won!" Jess replied, giving them a thumbs up.

"We fell down three stories!" Jack added, with mock enthusiasm.

"I lost," Riley sighed as she walked up to Seth and Kit-Kat.

"Ah, it's okay," Seth assured her. "If it's any consolation…we did too." He paused. "On second thought, I guess that's not a very reassuring thing to say…"

Zane and Zarya looked at each other briefly, but did nothing to acknowledge each other.

"So, how are the other challenges going, Chris?" Lola asked.

"Let's find out!" Chris replied. He clapped his hands together. "Field trip!"

They didn't walk three steps forwards when Arlen and a glum-looking Aaron marched towards them.

"Aaron blabbed," Arlen announced.

"Blabbed what?" Riley asked.

"The secret," Aaron whimpered.

Seth looked at Chris. "What secret?"

"_The_ secret," Chris chuckled ominously.

Seth frowned. "That tells me nothing."

"So how'd you blab _the_ secret?" Lola asked Aaron, with a certain degree of cynicism.

"Laura was gonna kill Mr. Snufflegums!" Aaron wailed.

"Mr. Snufflegums?" Rosetta echoed.

"His teddy-bear," Arlen elaborated. **(4)**

"This conversation is irritating me," Zarya muttered.

"Wait, wait, wait," Jess cut in. "Laura's here?"

"And Demi," Arlen added.

"Why are they here?" Zane questioned.

Chris cut in. "Okay, this ridiculously fast-paced conversation is over. We've got to keep moving to see…" He didn't get to finish, seeing as Bren and Damion began running towards the campers as well.

"Oh thank _God_, a _win_," Riley groaned in relief.

"Lacey and Logan are still in the sewer," Bren announced as soon as they walked into view.

Rosetta widened her eyes. "You sent them in the sewers?"

"With crocodiles," Damion added, tiredly.

"Alligators," Bren corrected weakly.

"_Nobody cares_," Damion groaned.

"So that's that…" Chris said slowly.

"What about Logan and Lacey?" Bren asked. "Shouldn't we help them get out?"

"Chef will help them," Chris yawned. "Anyways…let's go see how Mo, Glisa, and Sienna are doing." Chris waited, and then rolled his eyes. "Okay, I guess they're too lazy to walk up to us!"

"They're in the mess hall," Aaron piped up. "Arlen and I saw them when we were passing by…they're with Long and Chelsea."

The campers walked on, all looking at each other, knowing that the results of these two groups would determine who would win…and who would send somebody home tonight.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Holy cow…" Rosetta said slowly, as soon as the campers arrived to the mess hall. "This is...um…"

"Colorful," Jack suggested.

"Yeah," Rosetta agreed. "Colorful…"

Pink and purple paint covered every inch of the mess hall, all over the walls, floors, and benches. Sienna, Glisa, and Mo were sitting down, eating their dinner quite casually. Chelsea was lying on the ground, groaning to herself and also covered in paint. A cameraman—also covered in paint—was rocking in the fetal position, in the corner.

Long was still standing, albeit with some difficulty.

"Long gets a win for the heroes…" Chris announced, awkwardly. Uncharacteristically, Long threw his arms up and whooped, and proceeded to pass out on the floor.

"Who won with you guys?" Jess questioned the three escapees, nervously.

Sienna smirked and raised her hand, and Jess cursed.

"Well, well!" Chris chuckled. "Looks like the villains got rid of their losing streak…and the heroes are gonna be the ones to send someone home tonight! But we've got a surprise for you…the nineteen campers from Riley and Zane's challenge will be the ones casting the votes."

"WHAT?" Riley exploded. "Those guys…they're—they're insane!"

Chris grinned. "Exactly!"

Seth elbowed Aaron. "Was this _the_ secret?"

"I wish…" Aaron whimpered.

"Chris," Rosetta spoke up. "Not to totally screw myself over here, but I was in the season with these guys. Aren't they going to be a tad…biased?"

"Nah," Chris replied, waving his hand dismissively. "You didn't stick around long; I doubt they like you that much."

Rosetta raised an eyebrow. "_Well_. Never mind, then."

"Report the bonfire in thirty minutes, heroes! One of you will be saying goodbye…tonight!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The eleven heroes grimaced as they sat on the various stumps and seats around them. Nobody had an inkling who might be going home…which was making the whole night hopelessly stressful.

"When I call your name," Chris began, "you'll get a marshmallow. If you don't receive a marshmallow, you'll go to the Dock of Shame, board the Boat of Losers, and never come back…_ever_!" He paused, and then yelped as something hit him in the eye! "Ow! What was that?"

"A mini harpoon," Mo responded, half-heartedly.

"Sorry!" Glisa apologized, nervously hiding the watch behind her back. Chris rolled his eyes.

"Let's begin…!

"First off, Riley…Seth…Damion…Bren…Rosetta…Glisa…Long…Kit-Kat…Jess…"

Aaron and Mo glanced at each other, while the rest of the campers waited in nerve-wracked silence. Chris waved the marshmallow, tauntingly.

"The final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Aaron."

He caught it, letting a sigh of relief out, and Mo bent his head and slowly walked down the Dock of Shame. The three alliance members couldn't help but smile at each other.

Shocked, Damion watched Mo leave.

**(Confession Cam: Warning…someone actually says something smart)**

** Damion—**"It's crazy how fast someone can leave on this show. And you don't even get to say goodbye…" _(Still looking in shock, he shakes his head, slowly.) _"I guess sometimes you don't get to finish the story sometimes. Or you don't get the ending you want…it's impossible to tell the future, so when it comes to me and Mo…well, who knows?" _(He smiles.) _"We'll just have to wait and see."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: Again, ****what**** season are we on? AKA: the votes of the has-beens, AKA: a lot of really dumb inside jokes)**

** Satine—**"I…I didn't even get a cameo on the ship…" _(Whimpers.) _"I guess I vote for Mo…he seems rather underhanded."

**Allister—**_(Sighs.) _"Aaron."

**Leti—**"I vote for Long! He's quiet. _Too_ quiet…" _(She looks around, suspiciously.)_

**Jade—**_(Looks up, annoyed.) _"What's the point of this? These people don't even know who we—argh, whatever. I vote for Aaron."

**Kevin—**"Dude, I totally get where Aaron comes from, so I vote for Long because the dude is a _downer_."

**Thomas—**"I vote for Mo, because that dude is messing up the mojo, mon!" _(He pauses.) _"Mo…mojo…" _(He snickers.)_

**Raphael—**"Twenty-one voters? I'm…interested…to see how this will go. I'm not sure what this is accomplishing for _us_, besides creating enemies. Even _more_ enemies. I'll vote for Mo…if nothing else, to bring some peace to this drama-filled season."

**Effie—**"DUDE! That was like, the most freaking awesome challenge ever!" _(She leans back and cackles, kicking her feet in the air.) _"Ooh, I wish I had it on tape! But I have it on international TV, so…that works too! Anyways, I vote for Riley, since she lost against my apprentice!"

**Kenny—**"Very intriguing turnout this season. I'm a little insulted that none of us qualified…but no no, it's fine, it's fine." _(He clears his throat.) _"I'll vote for Mo."

**Ashlynn—**"Not the best day I've had. Although it was really nice to see Raphael again…" _(She blushes, but recovers quickly and continues.) _"I'm gonna vote for Mo." _(She pauses.) _"Boy, does this bring back memories…I feel like I need to take a shower." _(She shivers and exits the Confession Cam.)_

**Rachel—**"I feel guilty voting for these campers, although I've been watching this season. I feel like I know them well enough to say that…I need to vote for Mo."

**What's-his-face**—"I vote for _Rosetta_." _(He suddenly pauses, and glares at the camera.) _"Any my NAME is JOHN, damn it!"

**Hunter—**"Whoo…sweet challenge, man! I'm gonna vote for Kit-Kat! And I really don't know why…"

**Charity—**"On a completely irrelevant note…what would happen if there was a tie for who was voted off?" _(Ponders this momentarily.) _"Ah, never mind. I know Allister is voting for Aaron, but I like the crazy dude! In fact, there's really nobody I want to vote off…" _(She shrugs.) _"Hell, I'll vote off the bear."

**Doe—**"Oh ho…Riley, you put up a fight, but you can't win against Doerenda! Because I…have _freckles_! I like you…I have a feeling you'll be causing havoc in future challenges! At least, I hope so, the show isn't fun otherwise! Anywho, I'm gonna vote for Seth, because people tend to do better once their beau gone. Sorry, Kevin. You're still the coolest person in the history of persons, though! Without a doubt!"

**Warren—**_(Is sleeping.)_

**Joel—**"I didn't even want to come back here, damn it. I'll vote for…oh hell, I don't care. I vote for Aaron, 'cause his name comes first the alphabet."

**Leo—**"Oooh, what's THIS button do?" _(He pushes a button and the camera turns off.)_

**Alice—**"Bloody hell, did Joel vote for Aaron? What a…hrr, he'll pay, I promise, mates! Anyways, I'll vote for Mo! Good luck with the season, everyone!"

**Final tally:**

** Mo—**Seven votes

**Aaron—**Three votes

**Long—**Two votes

**Riley—**One vote

**Rosetta—**One vote

**Kit-Kat**-One vote

**Seth—**One vote

**The bear—**One vote

**Rest: **Invalid

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Twenty bucks if you drop me off on the other side of Camp Wawanakwa," Mo offered Chef, as the Boat of Losers _put-put-putted _away.

"Deal," Chef grunted, who was making quite a profit today. Mo handed him the bill, and grinned widely.

**Not long after:**

Logan wandered around near the forest, finally free from the sewer, only to be sidetracked by a familiar raven-haired girl.

"Oh, hey," Logan said, surprised.

"Hey, Logan," said Monique, smiling pleasantly. "Quite a shame…Mo was voted off, as you may have heard, but that's of no consequence to me. Anyways, I just thought you might want to know that Jack is starting to get closer to the other villains…I'd recommend eliminating him soon. And fast. And after…after…you can start targeting the heroes."

Logan nodded, and grinned. "Sure thing. Hey, you know what's weird? Something about you and Mo…" Monique froze, horrified at what Logan might've actually figured out. "Something similar…" Logan snapped his fingers together. "That's it!"

"What's it?" asked Monique, nervously.

"You guys…" Logan began. "Both have names that start with the letter 'M'!"

Monique relaxed. "Yup," she agreed. "We sure do…"

**Eliminated list: **Laura, Demi, Isaac, Riley F, Mo

**(A.N.) **Holy frighteningly fast updates, Batman!

Okay, so this was…faster than usual…but I definitely knew where this was going so the only thing left in the way was…well…actually writing it. The next chapter will not come out so quickly, I can assure you of that.

Anyways, some things to ponder…

What's _the_ secret?

What havoc will Monique cause?

And will Zane EVER discover who his saboteur is? And did he actually make a friend this challenge?

All this and more…later…

**(1)** I went to show like this. Safe to say, I was never the same again...

**(2) **Google it. I am absolutely serious.

**(3) **Homestarrunner reference.

**(4) **If Aaron doesn't have a teddy-bear named Mr. Snufflegums, then he SHOULD.

So, that's all. I don't own the majority of the campers (sorry I'm too lazy to name their owners).

By the way...it's time to play match-maker! Who do you think Jack should end up with, if anybody? And should Riley and Rosetta get back together?

I thank you for reading, and I apologize to Black Cat of Arda for booting Mo...even if he's not quite 'off' the island yet. Heh.

Okay, NOW that's all.


	10. You're Fired!

**(A.N.) **Alright, so my updates won't be quiet as fast, but I'll work on them when I get the chance. I hope you enjoy the chapter, everyone!

Anyways, the delayed updates are due to school, cross country season, and my newfound addiction to _Super Mario Galaxy 2_.

This chapter is brought to you by: the fact that I now know how to play some of my favorite video game songs on the piano, which is making me one very happy nerd. Oh, and it's dedicated to songs about robots. "Robots Don't Cry" and "Cyborgs vs. Robots", more specifically. The greatest pieces of geekery you'll ever listen to!

**One warning**: time moves fast in this chapter. When there's a scene-break, it could skip from a few moments to a few hours. I hope this doesn't cause too much confusion.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Chris, back in his usual garb, stood on the Dock of Shame to give the recap for the previous episode.

"Last time, on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains…

"The campers were divided to perform spy mini-challenges! There were shoot-outs, maniacal chases, mazes, daring escapes, and whatever the heck happened on that boat. Rosetta revealed to Jess the messy breakup she and the 'evil' Riley went through. The campers went through some major bonding time—even Lacey went out of her way to save Bren and Damion from some angry crocodiles. Alligators. Whatever.

"The villains finally scored a long-overdue win. Because we're fond of doing some that makes no sense whatsoever, we had the nineteen campers from a past season cast the votes against the heroes! The majority of the votes went to Mo, and he was kicked off of the island…err…sort of, kind of, not really. But he's out of the _competition_.

"Anyways! Will the campers continue to screw up their own relationships? Will the Seth-Bren-Riley alliance actually go somewhere, now? And who will get eliminated, in the most dramatic campfire ceremony yet…on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

**4:58 AM:**

The campers were sleeping peacefully under the cover of the dark Wawanakwan sky. The two days of rest were coming to a close, and the campers knew that the next challenge was to start the next day.

Most of the campers had been up late, at a 'rave party' that had been started by some of the boys. The party was surprisingly successful, considering it started with Aaron, Arlen, and Logan running around camp, shirtless. Arlen had been blasting Ke$ha on a boom box he had carried, while Logan and Aaron threw glow sticks at innocent bystanders.

For now, a rarity had plagued Camp Wawanakwa: all was quiet and at peace.

A minute ticked by.

Then another fifty-five seconds.

One second.

Two seconds.

Three seconds.

Four seconds…

_BRRRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNGGGG!_

The campers jerked up, gasping or screaming in surprise. Most of them fell off of their beds, but some were too tired to do anything besides groan and mutter a colorful collection of curses under their breath.

"What the hell is going on, McLain?" Jess shouted, looking upwards and shaking her fist at the unseen narcissist.

"I'm not sure he's around to hear you, Jess," Kit-Kat pointed out, softly, as she moved upwards and rubbed her eyes.

"With her volume," Rosetta muttered, groggily, "I wouldn't be surprised if he did."

"_Good morning, campers!" _Chris chuckled, via intercom, from outside. _"I hope you all had a nice sleep…"_

"Can't he just cut the crap?" Riley sighed. "I suppose it wouldn't be McLean without it, though…"

"_Get dressed and get ready, because we're going on a HIKE!"_

"At this hour?" Jess scoffed. "Yeah, right. I'm going back to bed…"

_"Before you decide to ignore me and climb back to bed, let me tell you this: the challenge is starting once we reach the end of the hike. So you can stay back, if you want, but you're team will be doing the challenge without you. And if they lose, they __might__ just hold that over your head…!"_

Jess paused, halfway up the ascent to her top bunk. "Err…would you guys hold it over my head if I—?"

"Yes," Riley interrupted her.

"Probably," Kit-Kat agreed, sheepishly.

"You'd be screwed, dude," Glisa agreed, wide-eyed. "I just learned that term before Mo left, isn't that chilly?"

"Cool," Rosetta corrected, and then, appraising Jess: "If you stayed behind and our team lost you'd be out of here faster than a Jimmy John's delivery."

Jess groaned, but nodded. "Fine, fine. Does anybody have a flashlight? We'll need it for the hike."

The girls searched everywhere but didn't find any trace of a flashlight.

"Well, this is…kind of amusing," Kit-Kat laughed. "We're on a summer-long vacation in the Wawanakwa wilderness and nobody brought a _flashlight_."

"I have an iPod," Riley offered, half-heartedly. "It…lights up…"

"I'd be wary of bringing anything valuable on this hike," Rosetta warned. "I don't know what's going on, but a five-o'-clock hike in the woods is just asking for trouble."

"Then we'll find our way by the light of the moon," Jess declared, yawning soon after. "Don't worry gals; I'll lead the way. I'll get Sacagawea all over this challenge's ass."

Glisa slapped Jess on the back, playfully. "Glad to hear it, amigo!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

The groggy campers assembled near the base of the forest, as Chris instructed them to do somewhere along the line.

"Do you mind telling us," Lacey growled, "what sort of challenge involves us getting up at this ungodly hour?

"I'm just wondering how Chris himself is still so cheerful…" Seth yawned, tiredly. "His curfew must be at eight, or something…"

Chris, ignoring Seth's comment, started his speech to the campers: "Mornin', campers!"

"Not…morning…sun…not up…need…cappuccino…frappuccino…Al Pacino…" A very sleepy Arlen mumbled, disjointedly.

"_So_," Chris continued. "Right now you might be wanting to pummel me senseless with a variety of blunt objects—Jess, please stop holding your shoe like a weapon—but you're gonna be grateful I got you up at this hour! You're gonna need all the time you can get for this challenge…"

This struck a nerve with the contestants, and they all tuned in a little closer to what Chris had to say.

"We're gonna be hiking through the woods, around to the beach, where the Boat of Losers will be waiting for us. We'll be taking a field trip to a lovely little town called…Hummingbird Hollow."

A short, awkward silence followed that announcement.

"You made that name up," Chelsea accused.

Chris's grin only grew. "I wish."

Lola raised an eyebrow. "What, is it populated by _Care Bears_…?"

"No, they live in the city Care-a-Lot," Aaron corrected her, and then cleared his throat, loudly. "Not…that…I would know…"

"Hummingbird Hollow is the town that me, Kit-Kat, and Seth went to for our spy challenge," Zarya commented quietly.

"Oh yeah, that's right!" Seth exclaimed. "I had forgotten its name. It's a really small town. Great bakery, there…" Kit-Kat nodded in agreement.

Rosetta shot the two a glare. "Why were you two at the _bakery_ during your challenge…?"

"We were doing our challenge!" Seth protested, nervously.

Zarya smirked. "After your pastry run, of course…"

**(Confession Cam: Loves a good scone, itself)**

** Seth—**_(Slaps his forehead.) _"Shoot, shoot, shoot! Why does everything I touch turn to crap!"

**Bren—**_(Shrugs.) _"I don't really have a problem with this; people goof of a bit on challenges all the time. The only thing that I'm surprised about is the fact that Zarya spoke two sentences in a one-minute period."

**Jess—**"Heh. I wish I was with those guys. I could've used a donut…"

**Rosetta—**"I'm not crazy, right? I should be expecting people to _do their freaking challenge_. You better watch yourself, Seth…I'd be warning Kit-Kat too, but I don't want her off. She makes a heck of a boysenberry muffin…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Chris," Zane spoke up, "why are we walking all through the forest, when we could just as easily cut across the island?"

"I'm glad you asked!" Chris replied, pleasantly. "See…there's a hidden object on this trail…and the team to get it will win the advantage!"

"Rather vague…" Long commented, half-heartedly. "What's the object…?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that," Chris chuckled, not looking sorry in the least.

"What's the advantage?" Riley questioned, but Chris just laughed and shook his head, telling Riley that he wasn't allowed to answer that, either.

"Chris, the sun's not even up yet," Lola complained. "How are we supposed to find something when we can't see it and we don't know what it is?"

Chris shrugged. "Beats me! Anyways, I'll meet you guys at the Boat of Losers…have fun in the woods!"

"Wait," Kit-Kat said nervously, "you're not leading us? How are we supposed to find our way?"

"Sheesh, do you guys ever run out of questions?" Chris complained.

"Hm…" Rosetta tapped her chin, mockingly. She looked at Jess. "Do we?"

Chris rolled his eyes. "The path is straightforward. As far as I'm aware, there shouldn't be another path that deviates away from the one you guys need to take. Capiche?"

"Ay, ay, captain!" Aaron shouted, giving the host a salute.

"Good!" Chris huffed, walking away. "Don't get eaten by any bears, alright? You'll spoil their appetite!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, just because we're competing right now, doesn't mean we can't make sure nobody dies…" Jack, taking charge, moved to the front of the group. "Anybody have a flashlight?" No hands went up. "Seriously? Okay, anybody have a phone?" Eighteen hands went up, and a few squirrels raised their paws, as well. "_Dudes_. We don't even get signal here."

"Come on, Jack," Lacey laughed. "Don't tell me you didn't bring your phone, too."

Jack coughed. "That's…not important. Anyways, let's keep our brightest devices on so people can see their way through the forest. When it comes to whatever this damn 'object' is, the first one to get it is the one to get it. No physical fights for it." This brought up a large amount of protest (mostly from the villains), but Jack was firm with this rule).

"He has a point," Lola, to many others' surprise, agreed. "Personally, I wouldn't want to get pushed off of a cliff by somebody, fighting for a stupid advantage."

"Alright, then…" Jack began leading the group through the long trek in the forest. "Let's do this…thing…!"

The path through the forest was hilly, all over the place, and littered with various stumps and rocks. Taking into account the lack of light, it was not a very fun walk. The path periodically grew thicker and thinner, so the campers moved on and off from a single-file line, to random clumps of groups.

"Oh! So sorry!" Kit-Kat exclaimed, as she stumbled over a very out-of-place plastic flamingo. She had accidentally pushed Long. "It was an accident!"

"Not a problem," Long assured her. He smiled and stooped down a bit. "Want a ride?"

Kit-Kat blushed. "That's too much to ask. It's hard enough moving along this path; you shouldn't have to carry me, too…"

"I don't mind," Long insisted, sincerely. "As long as you're not carrying twenty pounds of cake mix on you…which wouldn't surprise me…I'll be fine." Kit-Kat hesitated, and then grinned, and jumped on Long's back into the piggy-back position.

"Would you two hurry it up?" Lola complained, from behind them. "You're holding up the dang line!"

"Sorry, sorry!" Kit-Kat squeaked, as Long high-tailed it towards the group that had moved on quite a ways.

Bren had caught up with Lacey, looking like he wanted to talk to her, which surprised her.

"I just wanted to say thanks for saving my butt last challenge…" Bren thanked her, which Lacey raised her eyebrows to. "I…err…really appreciate it."

Lacey nodded. "Not a problem."

They walked in an awkward silence for a while, until Bren cleared his throat.

"I'll be heading backwards now…" he mumbled, awkwardly ducking away from the nonconformist.

Further behind the line, Zane had fallen for the umpteenth time only to catch himself at the very last moment. Riley, ahead of him, wheeled around and shined her iPod to get a better look at the unfortunate loner.

"Dude. I swear. You're either gonna wake up the bears or trip and break your clavicle or something. Need some help?"

"I'm fine," Zane sighed, pushing his glasses upwards. "Just…a little…uncoordinated." To accentuate that, his foot got caught underneath a nearby root and he stumbled over again. Riley caught him just in time and steadied him.

"No offense," Riley began, "but at this rate, you'll never make it to the Boat of Losers." Without another word, she then grabbed Zane and flung him over her shoulder.

"Well, this is overkill…" Zane deadpanned, as Riley continued to march through the woods, lugging along Zane.

"Better than having you die in the woods!" Riley replied, cheerfully. "Good thing you're such a pipsqueak!"

"Hm."

**(Confession Cam: It slices! It dices! It saves the world on a daily basis!)**

** Zane—**"I…don't really get why Riley is being nice to me. Then again, since when have I understood _anything_ a girl does on this show?" _(Aggravated, he sighs, and leans back, crossing his arms.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oy, Damion!" Rosetta hopped down from a log she had been walking on, and got in line behind Damion. "Wait up."

"Hey, Rosetta," Damion greeted her, cheerfully. "How's it going?"

"I'm alright. Nothing like a walk in the woods to freshen your mind," she commented, dryly, in response. "I was wondering about you, though…are you taking Mo's elimination okay?"

Damion hesitated for a moment. "Well…I don't know. I'm a bit disappointed, but…" he scratched the back of his head. "Nothing ever happened between us, so there's not that much to miss. Except missing what could have been missed. Does that make any sense?"

"Surprisingly enough," Rosetta laughed. "I get what you mean. You're missing what _could have_ happened between you two. No wonder Ezekiel's fan base is always so pissed off at the show." **(1)**

"Ezekiel has a fan base?" Damion echoed, surprised.

Rosetta nodded, wide-eyed. "I _know_, right? Sorry those dorks from my old season voted Mo off, anyways. They're a little crazy. Seems they're still that way..."

"I can't blame them. This show turns just about anyone crazy…" The two walked in silence for a while, until Damion, hesitantly, brought up what he knew was a touchy subject. "Speaking of elimination regret…how are you doing about Riley's elimination?"

"I already said I'm fine," Rosetta replied, dismissively.

"Ah, but you're lying."

Rosetta rolled her eyes. "What makes you say that?"

Damion shrugged, and grinned. "You've just went through a break-up, sweetie! You can't deny you had feelings for him. You should be binging on raspberry ice cream and watching chick flicks!"

"And why would I want to do that?" Rosetta retorted. "Riley's an ass."

"Hey!" Riley S. objected, from the back of the pack.

"Other Riley!" Damion and Rosetta shouted in unison.

Riley held a thumb up. "Got'cha."

Rosetta turned towards Damion and continued. "There's nothing really to regret. The relationship is over. I'm glad it's over. And I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Okay, okay," Damion replied, nodding. Rosetta continued making her way up the pack, and Damion shook his head to himself as he left.

**(Confession Cam: Do **_**we**_** have a fan base? We wouldn't mind one…)**

** Damion—**"Rosetta's not doing as well as she says she is, and it's worrying me! It's been a week from a break up with a guy she had major feelings for…and she's barely reacted at all! This is gonna end in trouble…we're gonna need a stash of ice cream…ooh, I'll see what they have at that bakery…I don't think my teammates would be amused if I asked Seth to show me where he found it." _(He laughs.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Not to be overly paranoid or anything…" Seth slunk back to talk with Bren. "Is it just my imagination…or did it seem kinda suspicious that _Lola_ was the one to take Jack's side with the no-fighting rule?"

"_Everything_ Lola does seems suspicious to you," Bren laughed. "I can't imagine what would happen if she ever agreed with something _you_ said."

"Well first of all, that would never happen," Seth retorted, smirking at his friend. "Watch this…" he whipped around, cupped his hands around his mouth, and shouted. "Hey Lola, this walk sure sucks, doesn't it?"

"It's great exercise and I love the scenery!" Lola replied.

"Isn't Chris the worst?"

"He's probably the most handsome, brilliant man I've ever seen."

"I am currently wearing a red shirt."

"I'd say it's more of an _alizarin crimson_," corrected Lola.

"See what I mean?" Seth questioned, glancing towards Bren.

"That's…" Bren struggled for words. "Just…strange."

"Definitely," Seth agreed. The two walked on for a while, until Seth halted Bren. "Hey, look over there…" he pointed towards a branch in the distance. Hanging from it was a neon green shirt with a picture of Chris's face on it. "That's either the object we need…or all that remains of a wayward fan girl…c'mon, let's grab it, quick!"

The two rushed up, and Seth hopped on Bren's shoulders to make the grab easier. Relieved, Seth saw the word 'advantage' on big letters on the back of the shirt. He jumped down, and grinned as he showed the object to some of his teammates.

"Guys, I've got it!" He declared, triumphantly.

"_Had_ it," Logan corrected, smoothly, before striding up the teen and innocently shoving him backwards.

Unfortunately, this was right on the edge of a particularly large hill. Seth rolled down all the way to the bottom…and Logan had already swept the shirt out of Logan's hands.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Jack shouted, turning around from the front of the group. Seth's yells as he fell down were enough to alert him, thankfully. "What's going on?"

"Seth fell as he grabbed the shirt out of the tree, and I grabbed the shirt off of the ground," Logan lied, with an innocent shrug.

"That's bull!" Bren objected.

"Shut up or I'll push you off, too," Logan growled, shaking a fist at the bespectacled boy.

"Logan, dude," Jack groaned, placing a hand to his forehead. "You can't say you didn't push him off, and then threaten to push Bren off when I'm _three feet away_."

"Oh…right…" Logan cleared his throat, awkwardly.

"We've got to help Seth!" Riley exclaimed, running up to the scene, still carrying Zane. She glared daggers at Logan. "Did you _push_ him?"

"Well, he was asking for it—"

Riley cut him off by flinging Zane over her shoulder and smashing him into Logan, which made both the loner and the bad boy fall over each other and onto the ground.

"I AM NOT A HAMMER!" The loner shouted, eye twitching slightly.

The gang of them continued to argue—and soon enough, Seth had actually climbed his way back up to the top. He didn't seem to be quite all right, though…

"Hey guys!" Seth laughed, staggering around. His messed-up hair went all over the place, he was splotched with dirt and bruises, and he had a slightly disturbing grin on his face. "I found a _quarter_…!"

He then proceeded to fall over to the ground.

"Did he really find a quarter?" Logan asked, hopefully. "Can we check his pockets?"

Riley stomped on his foot, which was an excellent substitute for an answer, in her books.

"Hate to interrupt this love fest," Sienna cut in, with an edgy expression as she walked towards the group, "But the opening to the Boat of Losers is right there." She pointed towards the distance, where the clearing was. "You guys coming, or what?"

"Lead the way, sweetheart," Logan responded, eyeing the others with a mischievous expression.

"Because, of course, you can't follow a straight path by yourself…" Sienna teased him, smirking all the while.

The others gave each other quick glances, before grumbling to themselves and walking away as well.

Riley dashed back after a moment to drag the loopy Seth with her.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Dudes!" Chris yelped, once he saw the last of the group. "What the heck happened?"

"Logan pushed Seth off of a cliff!" Riley growled.

"So why are you carrying Zane, too?"

"He makes a good melee weapon," Riley grumbled, walking towards the gathered campers.

Most of the other campers glared at Logan, once they heard what he did to Seth. The bad boy shrugged, and lifted the Chris McLean shirt up for viewing.

"I've got the advantage," he amended.

"Yeah, but Seth got it first," Jack muttered. "I don't think we can call it ours."

"Well, who's the one _holding_ it, Jack?" Chris chuckled.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Logan, but…"

"Well then, the villains get the advantage!" Chris announced. Jack sighed, and rolled his eyes again, but didn't object: how could he complain about his team getting an advantage? The heroes muttered angrily amongst themselves, but didn't put up too much of a fight.

"Now then, did all the campers make it out alive?"

"Were you expecting someone _not_ to?" Chelsea deadpanned.

Chris shrugged, and grinned. "You never know! Anyways, pile in the Boat of Losers, campers!" The campers grimaced, but did as they were told. Chris got on a nearby Jet-Ski and whooshed past them. Chef, steering the Boat of Losers, followed Chris.

"You seem pissed that we got the advantage," Lacey observed, glancing at Jack with curiosity.

"Just at the method," Jack replied, arms crossed, as he leaned against the Boat of Losers. "Don't get me wrong, I'm a villain, so I love screwing with people…"

Arlen, nearby, snickered at this, but Jack and Lacey ignored him.

"Pushing them off cliffs, though…" Jack continued, and shrugged. "It's not a big deal, but I'm feeling almost…paranoid ever since Isaac got booted off. One screw-up could boot me off the island for good."

Lacey nodded, absentmindedly. "That's reasonable, I guess. Considering what happened to Isaac and Riley…you do seem different, though. I mean, since you've come to the island. You seem more mature lately—then again, considering the _other_ villain boys…" Lacey paused, just in time to see Arlen shoot a rubber band at Chelsea. Chelsea, paying him no mind, caught the rubber band in mid-air and tied her hair in a ponytail with it.

"Thanks," Chelsea called out, while Arlen just grumbled to himself and sat down, disappointed.

"Face it," Lacey snickered, glancing back at Jack. "You're smarter than the others. That's the burden you'll have to bear…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The Boat of Losers drew up to Hummingbird Hollow just as the pinks, reds, and yellows of the sunrise were emerging from the horizon.

"That was probably the least manly line of the season," Arlen commented, pointing upwards—although his fellows campers weren't sure why.

"Ooh, this town is so _lindo_!" Glisa observed, as she hopped off of the boat. A huge 'Welcome to Hummingbird Hollow' sign sat on the hill that the group was now walking up to. The town seemed to be a huge tourist spot, each shop or store seemed to offer something unique and interesting.

"We're in downtown Hummingbird Hollow," Chris told the campers, as they began walking closer to the town. "It's pretty empty right about now."

"That's because normal people aren't up at this hour," Jess growled.

"You said there was a reason we had to get here so early," Riley commented, as she plopped a very apathetic Zane down, and draped Seth's arms around her shoulder to keep the poor guy standing. "Can you tell us now?"

"Yup! Listen up campers, here's the deal: there are two empty buildings in this area, on completely opposite sides from each other. One was a nice, family-owned restaurant. We had to kick them out. It was harder than it sounds. Man, those guys were _stubborn_…"

The campers gave each other uneasy looks.

"The other building was…err…well, I don't know what it was, but it's empty so we're _taking it_!" Chris finished, cheerfully.

"So what's the challenge?" Sienna questioned, a thin eyebrow raised.

"Campers, today we're taking some ideas from a very popular TV show…"

"Don't we _already_ do that?" Lola questioned, smirking.

"Shut it!" Chris barked, but soon returned to his sadistically cheerful self. "Anyways! Today, the challenge is very simple…using a budget I give you, you're going to turn your empty building into a hotspot for these small town folks!

"The real fun comes with this…you can use any means possible to attract customers away from your opponents' building, and back to yours. And you can make your building into anything you want it to be! Within budget, of course. And…within legality. And…don't listen to anything Arlen, Logan, or Aaron say—"

"Done," Chelsea interrupted Chris, breezily.

"When it comes to what they want the building to become," Chris finished, giving Chelsea an amused grin.

"How big are the budgets, Chris?" Jack asked.

Chris crossed his arms, and grinned widely at the assembly of campers. "Y'know how, like, freaking successful this show is, right…?"

The campers nodded slowly.

"Well, you might be pretty happy with the budget we're able to give you guys. Let's put it like this: unless you decide to buy Canada, or invite the Black Eyed Peas over to perform…you probably won't go over budget."

"I think the latter was more expensive…" Bren remarked.

"Oh, one more thing," Chris added, quickly. "You obviously can't go all the way back to Wawanakwa for the Confession Cam, so…we're gonna have a cameraman stationed in _that_ Caribou Coffee." He pointed to the town, at the aforementioned coffee shop.

"So we have to go all the way back to Caribou every time we want to make a confession?" Kit-Kat questioned. Chris nodded, and Kit-Kat tilted her head. "Wouldn't that make the people who work there kinda mad?"

"Eh, maybe," Chris replied, shrugging. He grinned. "Not my problem. The viewers love the Confession Cam…I think…so we've got to have it on, of course! If some irate baristas hurl hot coffee at you for loitering…then that's even better!"

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: TOO MUCH ALLITERATION)**

** Sienna—**_(She sits on a large, comfy couch, and has a fireplace behind her.) _"You know what they say…the needs of the few outweigh the needs of the Chris. Now if you'll excuse me…I think I'll buy a latte." _(Gets up and leaves.)_

()()()()()()()()()

Chris began to hand out small, golden cards to everybody. "You can buy whatever you need with these, for your building and for your advertising…but you need to buy stuff that's for your building, not stuff for yourself. I _guess_ you guys can buy yourself _lunch_…" he sighed, annoyed, "but that's it."

"Chris is letting us eat?" Aaron questioned, surprised. "Holy cow, he's going soft…"

"Or senile," Jess added, tapping her head. "How old are you again, Chris?"

"Ah ha…" Chris laughed, darkly. "I wouldn't get so comfy, campers. After all, there are witnesses on this island…and many, many challenges left on Camp Wawanakwa…"

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: The inanimate can't testify)**

** Sienna—**_(Nervously sips her latte.)_

**Lacey—**"We got that last line of Chris's on camera, right?" _(Raises an eyebrow.) _"I almost envy the person who gets sent home tonight…"

**Chelsea—**"Yeah, just FYI…" _(She holds up a map.) _"In case you want to save us from certain death, remember, we're on Camp Wawanakwa…right here, in the middle of nowhere." _(She points to a spot on the map.) _"If you want to know how to spell Wawanakwa, just throw a bunch of w's and a's together, and I'm sure you'll come close."

**Zarya—**"Yes, we get it Chris, you're a sadist." _(Rolls her eyes, but after a moment of silence is looking a tad worried.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Chris began handing the campers small, golden cards. "Here's how you'll pay for all your…stuff. Everybody's getting one, because let me tell you, you're gonna want to break apart into small groups to do this. Things might get a little crazy. Also…" Chris whipped out two maps, and gave one to Jack, and the other to Rosetta. "These are the maps to the town! Small as the town is, they might come in handy."

"So, how do you decide who wins this challenge?" Arlen asked, arms crossed.

"You need to make profit this challenge," Chris replied, "which is another reason you might want to watch your spending. This profit can come from wherever you want—admission…or from people buying merchandise…or food…whatever!"

"I'm guessing there's a deadline?" Damion spoke up.

"Yup! The deadline is…seven o'clock, tonight. The biggest profit wins. The losing team gets sent back to Wawanakwa for someone's final dinner…because one unlucky sucker will be going home. The winning team will also be going home and having a crappy dinner…but they're skipping out on that whole elimination part of it!"

"Great," Zane sighed. "What's our advantage again…?"

"Oh, yeah," Chris exclaimed, as if he had forgotten that. "The building that the villains have comes much more prepared than the heroes' building." The heroes grimaced at this. "Now then!" Chris finished, clapping his hands together. "Your respective building is marked on your map. Head there now…and try to figure out what the heck you're gonna do! Go, go, go!"

The campers glanced at each other, and soon dashed off.

"ALL YOUR CUSTOMER ARE BELONG TO US!" Seth shouted crazily, still being dragged by Riley.

"Alright then…" Chris mused, looking around the town. "Crap…what am _I_ supposed to do for the next _thirteen_ hours…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh, cool!" Kit-Kat cheered, as the heroes entered their designated building. "We've got the old family restaurant! Which…is kind of making me feel guilty…but still, this is exciting…" The pastry chef wandered off then, inspecting every inch of the old restaurant with fascination.

It was a fairly plain place but there were some pretty blatant problems. Although the floor (bamboo flooring) and ceiling (white) were normal, the top half of the walls was frighteningly lime green (although the bottom was plain gray). There were booths that lined that east and west walls, but the chairs and tables that were in-between were all overturned and strewn around, along with piles of trash.

"Okay, so add 'paint job' and 'clean-up' to the to-do list," Rosetta commented, as she walked around the place. "Any other obvious problems?"

"Right there," Damion replied, pointing to a fist-sized hole in the wall.

"Probably a present left behind from the previous owners," Long chuckled, awkwardly. "How are we supposed to fix it?"

Nobody had any suggestions.

"Is there an app for it?" Aaron asked, half-joking.

"Well, let's assess what other problems we have…" sighed Rosetta. She jogged over and went in the sleek, silver kitchen, where Kit-Kat was. "Any issues in here?"

"Surprisingly enough," Kit-Kat replied, smiling broadly, "I don't see anything wrong with here. Most of the tools and appliances are still here. There's no food lying around or in the fridge, but I suppose that's to be expected."

"Alright then," Rosetta mused, and she smiled. "Things are looking pretty good…" The two girls re-entered the main area to meet with the rest of their group.

"So I googled 'how to fix a hole in the wall'," Aaron told the two girls, "and I think we have a problem. We could buy the tools to do it, but it takes a really, really long time for it to be done."

"Wait…" Jess stopped Aaron. "You googled it? That means…"

Aaron widened his eyes. "Oh my God, that's right…"

The other heroes gave each other excited, disbelieving, crazed glances, and said the same thing in unison:

"_We get signal here…"_

Phones flipped out in a blur, and the campers were already texting, checking their mail, updating their twitter—

"Wait!" Riley cried, holding out her hands. The other campers looked up. "We can't get distracted! We need to go ahead, and do this challenge!"

"And then we can go on our phones…?" Aaron whimpered, hopefully.

Riley nodded. "Yeah. Sound good?"

The heroes sighed, reluctantly, but pocketed their phones.

"Okay, so we need someone to go out and buy paint," Damion ordered. "Who wants to go do that?"

"I'll paint!" Aaron offered. He glanced to his side, where the team's prankster was standing, "Jess…wanna help?"

Jess shrugged. "Sure. What color should we get, guys?"

"Anything but this," Rosetta replied, waving at the blinding walls with annoyance. Nodding, Jess and Aaron exited the restaurant, gold cards in hand.

"We also need a clean-up crew," Long said.

"Okay…" Rosetta put her hands on her hips. "I'll grab some garbage bags and…cripes, maybe a shovel…and I'll clean up the garbage. While I'm gone, someone start picking up the chairs and tables."

"On it!" Glisa chirped, dashing around the kitchen, as the tough girl left the restaurant to buy the items she needed.

"We've still got the hole over there," Kit-Kat sighed. "If we can't fix it…we're going to have to cover it up. Think a poster would work?"

"It should," Bren agreed, with a shrug. "Just no Justin Bieber, please."

"Done." Kit-Kat nodded and began jogging out the door. "I'll be back in a bit!"

"We still don't have an idea what we're gonna do with this place," Riley said, nervously, to Bren.

"We'll get there," Bren assured her. "The first step is just…y'know…not making this place look like crap." Bren looked concernedly at the karate kid that was being propped up by Riley. "Err…is Seth doing any better?"

"He can only speak in internet memes," Riley sighed. "Isn't that right, Seth?"

"Well _excuuuuuse_ me, princess!" Seth slurred.

"Should we be like, sending him to a hospital or something…?" Bren questioned, awkwardly.

"Let's just set him down…get him some ice…let him rest…maybe put some duct tape on his mouth…" Riley suggested, as she and Bren helped Seth into a booth.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"DUDES!" Arlen nearly fainted with happiness once he saw the inside of their building. "It's an arcade! We should rename it and call it the ARLEN-cade! Ha!"

"Okay, first of all, you're getting ahead of yourself," Chelsea told him, as she strode into the room. "Second…no way in hell are we calling it that. Now then…huh, this place _is_ pretty cool…" The pyromaniac couldn't help but smile.

The walls were light blue and adorned with big silver stars. The carpeted floor was navy blue and had a variety of video game characters on it. There were arcade games, an air-hockey table, a ping-pong table, and even a ball pit. It was one story high, but it was surprisingly large.

There was a prize booth off in one corner…unfortunately, there were no prizes.

"So the good news is that the place doesn't need and fix-ups or clean-ups," Jack observed, as he walked around the arcade.

"Uh, hello?" Lola raised an eyebrow, and gestured to the floor. "Tacky carpeting, much?"

"Hey! Don't diss the goombas!" Logan objected.

Jack grinned. "Sorry, Lola, but I don't think we have time to re-carpet the whole place. I'm not even sure _how_ we would do that, to be honest."

"So, this is pretty straight-forward, isn't it?" Lacey questioned, as she hopped onto the prize booth counter. "Buy some prizes, and make people buy tokens for the games."

"Conveniently enough," Sienna announced, as she opened a few drawers from the prize booth counter, "all the tokens are still here! This is gonna be a piece of cake."

"Can we buy cake?" Arlen asked hopefully. "Is it lunchtime yet?"

Zane glanced at his watch: it was only about 6:30.

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: We're too old for this…stuff…)**

** Zane—**"Knowing Arlen's hours, I wouldn't be that surprised if this was his lunchtime…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay, so here's what we'll do…" Jack instructed, waving the villains over.

"_Jack's in charge, of our days, and our nights…Jack's in charge, of our wrongs, and our rights_…" Lacey sang under her breath, and she grinned innocently when Jack gave her a look that was somewhere between amusement and annoyance. "Well, I can't help it," Lacey amended, "you are leading _everything_ today!"

"Well, does anybody else want to do it?" Jack questioned the group. The villains, lethargic as they were, all gave each other awkward glances, nobody saying anything. Jack shrugged, mildly, and continued. "Anyways, here's how we should do this…this place doesn't seem to need any renovations, so—"

"What about the outside?" Zarya cut in, quietly. "It's not going to catch anyone's attention. It's just a one-story, white building. All the letters fell off of the top...I found this near the door…" she lifted up a giant 'A' that was probably once part of the word 'arcade'.

"Can I have that?" Arlen asked, hopefully. Zarya shrugged and nodded, and Arlen whooped as he took it out of her hands. "Awesome! This is totally going on my bunk bed! A for Arlen, baby!"

"Ah…" Jack grimaced. "Well…I guess we need to get a new, flashy sign. And maybe a paint job…does that sound good?" The villains weren't excited about that, but they nodded. "Alright then. A team of five painters—any volunteers?" Unsurprisingly, there were none. "Dang these teenage stereotypes…I'll volunteer myself. Anybody else…please?"

"Ugh," Lola groaned, after a long, uncomfortable silence. "_Fine_. I'll paint."

"I'll join too," Sienna offered.

Lacey smirked, half-heartedly, and raised her hand. "Sign me up and give me a pair of overalls."

"One more?" Jack asked, hopefully. Nobody seemed thrilled, but Jack didn't seem too deterred. "Four should work, in any case. We'll head out and get same paint in a bit. Logan, can you get the new sign for the arcade?" Logan nodded. "Zane…can you get a bunch of prizes for the arcade?" Zane held a thumb up. "Okay, who does that leave…?"

Chelsea, Arlen, and Zarya raised their hands.

"You guys can try to find a way to advertise the arcade," Jack suggested. Zarya and Chelsea didn't seem too excited with the arrangement, but they didn't want to ignite the anger of their teammates. The three villains nodded.

The villains all just kind of awkwardly stared at each other for a few seconds, until Logan broke the silence.

"All right! Hell yeah, we're gonna attract…some…customers and stuff!" And with that not-quite-a-pep-talk talk, the bad boy ran out of the store.

Unsure what else they were gonna do, his teammates followed him.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"All right!" Rosetta cheered, as she flung a bag of garbage over her shoulder. "This place is starting to not look like crap!" The garbage had been picked off of the floor, the tables and chairs were all turned right-side-up, and a not-so-inconspicuous Total Drama Island poster had been slapped over the hole in the restaurant's wall.

"We should start thinking about what we're gonna do with this place," Riley advised, as she plopped herself down on a nearby chair. "Any thoughts, guys?"

"I was thinking that we could just turn it into a more…relaxed sort of club," Damion suggested. "We have a kitchen; Kit-Kat could bake snacks and nice things to eat. We could also get a projector and play a movie."

"That…sounds perfect," Long complemented, smiling widely.

"And we'll go around, talking with the customers, taking orders…" Kit-Kat mused, nodding.

"Like _Ouran High School Host Club_…" Seth yawned, face-down, half-asleep on the ground. Frantically, Riley propped him back down and laid him down in a booth. Unfortunately, a second later, he rolled back to the ground again.

"Okay, seriously…" Bren sighed. "Shouldn't we take Seth to a hospital?"

"Nah, he'll be fine," Aaron said dismissively. "Ain't that right, buddy?"

"FINLAND!" Seth wailed in response.

"Switching topics," Jess continued. "Aaron and I got a crap-load of paint, so we're all set to go, when it comes to that. We can climb up on the booths and paint the part that's above the…bottom-ish part of the wall."

"I'll get some more decorations," Riley offered. "That poster looks really…weird all by itself, so I'll get some more. Tons of Justin Bieber for you, Bren." Bren rolled his eyes, but smirked.

"I'll get whatever we need for food," Long offered. "Kit-Kat, can you make me a list?"

"I'm already on it!" Kit-Kat replied, jotting down some items on a notepad. "I'll go get the karaoke machine while you get the food!"

"So that leaves us…" Rosetta observed, looking at Glisa, Damion, Bren, and Seth. "Glisa, Damion, do you guys want to advertise the club with me?"

"_Absolutamente_!" Glisa cheered in agreement.

"And you, Damion, in an answer with less syllables…?" Rosetta questioned, grinning.

Damion smirked. "Sure."

"How about Seth and I?" Bren questioned.

"How about you two advertise on the other side of town?" Rosetta suggested. "Try to attract away the villains' customers."

"If they have any," Aaron snickered, soon after exchanging a high-five with Jess.

"Here that, buddy?" Seth giggled, still completely half-baked, as he put an arm around his buddy's shoulders. "We're attracting customers! Get your stuff on, and flaunt it! Or…strut it! Or…just…shake that thing! Yeah!"

Bren glanced at Riley, and the gamer just laughed in response: "At least he stopped with the internet memes. He'd be shouting at customers to do barrel rolls…"

"Have I ever told you how pretty you are?" Seth questioned, looking at Riley with wide eyes. Riley's amused demeanor soon fell to surprise.

"Err…" Riley scratched the back of her head, too nervous to respond.

"And you're so nice…and funny…and…" Seth's voice faded away as Bren hurriedly carried the karate kid out the door. His teammates stared at them until they were gone, and everybody was having difficulties continuing their meeting.

"I'm interested to see how their advertising goes…" Aaron commented.

"Anyways," Rosetta cleared her throat, loudly. "Let's all go ahead and get this thing started…?"

"Why was dat _a__question__?__" Glisa asked._

_ "Oh, I don't know," Rosetta groaned. "Let's just get this darn challenge over with."_

_ "We still have over ten hours left in it," Riley pointed out._

_ "__Not__. __Helping__."_

**~~~(T-T-T-Time Skip!)~~~**

"All right, let's see here…" Riley wandered around in a strange shop that held just about anything she could need for decorations. She picked up a few interesting posters, and threw in a Jonas Brothers poster just to mess with Bren. As she made her way up the toy aisle, straight to the check-out register, her blood ran cold at the sight of another competitor.

"Logan," the gamer growled.

Logan turned his head, surprised for a moment, and then smirked. "How's it goin', Ice Queen?"

"_I'm_ fine," Riley snapped, "but Seth is still seriously messed up, thanks to you!"

"Wasn't he always?" Logan retorted, with a shrug.

"That's _it_!" Riley, furious, grabbed the first thing she saw—which happened to be a plastic lightsaber. Logan raised an eyebrow, but then reached for a lightsaber and waved it around maliciously.

The two clicked the toys on—Riley's lightsaber glowed blue, and Logan's lightsaber, conveniently enough, glowed red.

Logan chuckled. "Oh, it's on, sister."

"On like Donkey Kong," Riley agreed, clenching her teeth together.

And with a battle cry, the two teens leapt at each other.

Nearby, a little toddler tugged on his mother's sleeve and pointed to the spectacle.

"Mommy, mommy," the boy said. "Jedi are real!"

"That's nice dear," the mother replied, not paying attention in the least.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Dat looks like it hurts your face…" Glisa commented, eyeing Rosetta with mild concern.

"Nah, it's not too bad," Rosetta replied, cheerfully. She was balancing the end of a twirling baton on her forehead. Draped over the top of the baton was a striped vest, and balancing on top of _that_ was a fancy black hat.

"My bro was good at tricks like this," Rosetta explained, as she occasionally hopped from foot to foot to keep the baton balanced. "I can't do half the stuff he can—most of it's illegal—but he taught me some cool tricks. Once I pop this baton up, the vest will fall so I'm wearing it and the hat will land right on my head!"

"Ooh, cool!" Glisa marveled. After a moment, she questioned: "I used the right word dat time…didn't I?" Damion nodded and gave her a thumb up.

"Damion," Rosetta continued, "can you get the crowd's attention over here?" The three of them were on the corner of a busy street, standing on a bench while Damion and Glisa held a glittery sign advertising their club.

Damion glanced around the street, unsure what to do.

"BOOM!" He shouted abruptly, as he flailed his arms wildly. Startled by the suddenness of it, Rosetta yelped and her balance slipped. The baton hit her in the head, while the hat landed on Damion's head and the vest slipped down Glisa's upward-thrown arms.

The nearby crowd applauded. Rosetta stumbled to her feet and chuckled awkwardly as she twirled the baton around in her hand.

"That's right…" she called out, clutching her head. "The Heroes' Club, down on 42nd Street, is open five-to-seven, and it offers many types of entertainment…"

"Apparently, that includes slapstick," Damion observed.

"Anyways…admission is twenty dollars…for dinner and a movie and a chance to talk with the newest cast of Total Drama…" Rosetta muttered. "So…get your butts down there…"

"Say it nicer," Glisa suggested in a whisper.

"Please get your butts down there," Rosetta corrected herself.

"Before even more heroes get head injuries," Damion added. His face scrunched up. "Seriously, this is getting ridiculous."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zarya kept an apathetic face as she marched through the west side of Hummingbird Hollow, half-heartedly handing out flyers that advertised the villains' arcade. As she marched down street after street, a sudden rumbling filled her ears…one that was all too familiar.

"Fan-girls?" Zarya whispered to herself, harshly, in disbelief. "God…they must be four-fifths of this stupid town's population…" Unwillingly, she turned her head towards the source of the rumbling…sure enough, some angry tweens were charging through the street, and pointing straight at…Zarya?

"YOU NEVER GAVE US DUNCAN'S NUMBER!" One tween screamed.

"YOU WERE A LIAR, LIAR, PLANTS FOR HIRE!" Cried one more.

"GET HER!" Another added.

"LOUD NOISES!" Shouted another.

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: Four-fifths of the time, stating the obvious)**

** Zarya—**"I should've known they'd come back to haunt me. Or…kill me. Whichever, I guess..."

()()()()()()()()()()

Zarya sprinted as fast as her legs could carry her, but the mob was gaining on her. As she turned the corner, and her fliers spilled out of her arms, a hand reached out and pulled her in an alley as the crowd stampeded past.

Zarya stayed quiet, watching them for a moment, and then turned around to see who her savior was.

Zane.

"Don't say anything," Zane sighed, as he threw a large burlap sack over his back, carrying it with difficulty. "Death by fan-girls is not something I want to see in anybody's obituary. Now then, if you'd please step aside, I've got a crap-load of prizes I bought from some balding man with a handlebar moustache and a tendency to sing along to the Lady Gaga he plays…I've had enough of this challenge; I'm bringing these prizes back and just…staying out of the way until this stupid thing is over…goodbye."

Following his longest monolog in the history of his somewhat-short life, Zane calmly walked out the alley and out of sight.

Zarya leaned against the alley wall, and sighed.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Arlen and Chelsea wandered another part of Hummingbird Hollow, and, against all odds, Chelsea was actually not at Arlen's throat. Yet.

"Aw, come on, how can you not want to stop for ice cream?" Arlen complained, grinning at Chelsea. "That is un-teenager-like…neigh, I say, _that_ is un-_AMERICAN_." Chelsea rolled her eyes but awarded Arlen a smirk.

"I'm not gonna take any chances. Our team could leap at any reason to vote us off," Chelsea replied, shrugging.

"Us?" Arlen repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, _us_. Considering we're working together, if you screw up, _I'm_ freaking _accountable_."

Arlen was confused. "Wait…what? You're an accountant?"

Chelsea slapped her forehead. "Just hand out those flyers, alright?"

"Fine! Have fun…counting numbers while I'm gone!"

Chelsea rolled her eyes, again. "I will." She continued taping posters to windows of stores, while Arlen furiously handed out flyers just about as furiously as someone could hand out flyers.

"Ah, nice, an arcade," an amused voice commented. "But does it have scones? Because we totally do." Arlen was very confused until he saw that the voice belonged to Bren. Seth was lying on the ground, sleeping.

"Is he still cuckoo for cocoa puffs?" Arlen asked, pointing towards Seth.

"I think the sleep will do some good for him," Bren replied. "We'll see how he's doing when he gets up. How's your…'Villains' Arcade' going? I guess I can't criticize the name, considering we're calling our club 'The Bird Feeder'."

"That name kinda sucks," Arlen observes.

Bren chuckled, "Yeah, well, we were almost called the 'Heroes' Club', but since a hero is a sandwich, and a club is a sandwich…we thought that might get confusing."

"Great, now I'm really hungry," Arlen complained, patting his stomach. "Is it lunchtime yet?"

"Actually it is…" Bren replied, before jumping in surprise when Seth stirred at his feet. "Oh! Seth's waking up!" As Seth groaned and struggled to his feet, Bren helped him up. "Dude, are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm…I'm okay…" Seth mumbled. "Where are we? What…what happened?"

"Logan pushed you off of that big hill," Bren told him. "Remember?" Seth closed his eyes for a moment, before thrashing wildly.

"AGH! He DID! I'm gonna…I'm…what am I gonna do?"

"Make him pay?" Arlen guessed.

"Yeah, that's right!" Seth agreed. "Dang it…my head still hurts like heck…have you guys been carrying me around the whole time?"

"Well, you haven't exactly been unconscious the whole time," Bren responded, hesitantly.

Seth was puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"You were kind of…loopy for a while…" continued Bren, really reluctantly this time. "You were shouting internet memes…then you were just plain loopy…then you sort of…um…professed your love for Riley…"

Seth paled. "What?"

"Well, not completely," Bren corrected himself, as if that made Seth feel better. "You just told her you thought she was pretty, smart, and funny…in a very love struck tone of voice…"

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: At least we no longer have an abundance of crazies…)**

** Seth—**"I should've come to this island wearing duct tape over my mouth." _(He groans loudly and buries his head in his hands.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"It's okay, dude," Bren assured Seth. "You were completely out of your mind, I'm sure Riley realizes that it was the head injury talking, not you."

"What if it's true?" Seth groaned.

"If everything you said was true, you mean?" Bren questioned.

Seth nodded, weakly.

"Well, in that case…" Bren coughed, awkwardly, and squatted next to Seth. "I guess we'll…find a way to see if Riley likes you too."

"Can I help?" Arlen asked.

"No," Bren responded. "Go away."

Dejectedly, Arlen walked back towards Chelsea.

"I always thought…" Seth looked away for a second.

"Always thought what?"

"I always thought…you…liked Riley…"

"Oh, I don't like her like _that_!" Bren replied, slapping Seth on the back. "She and I are good friends, but so are we, and I wouldn't take her from you. We're not turning this into a Duncan-Courtney-Gwen thing, alright?"

Seth smirked. "Alright. Thanks."

Bren grinned. "No problem."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"It smells _delicioso_ out here!" Glisa observed, as she, Rosetta, and Damion walked towards 'The Bird Feeder'. "Yum…Kit-Kat must already be baking in there!"

"I hope Aaron and Jess finished the painting," Damion mused. "It _has_ been a few hours, surprisingly enough. Time flies when you're having fun, I guess…"

Rosetta gave him a look. "We're having fun?"

Damion grinned. "Point taken."

Glisa opened the doors for her two friends, and as the three of them entered they dropped their jaws.

The walls depicted Camp Wawanakwa, and around all the walls were very accurate depictions of the twenty-four contestants doing various things. Over on one wall, Riley, Bren, and Seth were playing videogames—the boys looked frustrated while Riley looked triumphant. On another part of the wall, Aaron was dramatically carrying Jess through a crocodile-ridden creek. Other highlights included Jack slapping his forehead while Logan and Arlen posed ridiculously in the background, and Lacey and Sienna riding a Wooly Beaver, for God knows what reason.

"This is…fantastic!" Damion complemented, wide-eyed. "You and Jess did all this?"

"Eh…not exactly," Jess admitted, half-heartedly, as she pocketed her phone. "To be perfectly honest…I was just making things worse."

"Well Aaron, you did an amazing job!" Damion complemented, smiling.

"Thank you, my heroic friends!" Aaron proclaimed, as he spun to face them, splattered with paint and grinning with pride. "I thought it would be a suitable background…hey, where's Glisa?"

"She was here just a second ago," Jess commented, just as confused as Aaron. "That's odd."

"I'm sure she'll show up," Damion commented. "Come on; let's get this place started up!" He turned his head to see Rosetta quietly looking at the cartoon likeness of Riley F. Damion softly tapped her on the shoulder. "Rose? You okay?"

Rosetta jumped, as if she had been shaken out of a trance. "Yeah," she muttered, walking away with slow, measured steps. "Yeah, I'm fine…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"You've got to paint, guys!" Lola chuckled, as she walked towards the arcade, carrying a tray of beverages. "If you want this lemonade, you've gotta earn it!"

"How did it take you over an hour to get us four beverages?" Sienna shouted, annoyed.

"It was a hard choice between lemonade and limeade," Lola replied, innocently.

"Well, we said we wanted lemonade, so if I'm not mistaken, that probably means we want lemonade," Lacey commented, dryly.

"Is it still cold?" Jack asked. "That's kind of all I care about right now."

Lola smirked. "No need to worry. It's as cold as us girls' attitudes." The three painting teens scampered down the ladders they had been standing on to paint their building. They headed over to Lola to grab their drinks, which, despite the wait, they were immensely grateful for—they were parched.

"Thanks," Jack told Lola, before gulping down the lemonade.

"You guys have made progress," Lola observed, looking towards the arcade's exterior. Instead of the chipped, white paint that it had been, most of it was now a glossy red.

"Logan's not back with the stupid sign yet, though," Sienna sighed. "I'd hate to think what he's up to."

"Probably distracted by something shiny," Lacey commented.

"Probably," Sienna agreed.

"Zane got back with the prizes a while ago, though," Jack told the others. "He's setting them up on the shelves right now."

"It's good to see _someone's_ doing something around here," Sienna chuckled. "How do you think Arlen, Chelsea, and Zarya are doing…?"

The four villains gave each other looks.

"Now that you mention it…" Jack scratched the back of his head, "maybe putting a loner in that group wasn't such a good idea."

"And the whole Arlen-Chelsea thing," Lacey added. "I'd like to hope that Arlen doesn't end up on fire by the end of this challenge."

"We're starting to sound screwed," Lola noted, dryly.

"A little bit," Sienna agreed. "Shall we get back to painting?"

"Yeah, I guess," Lacey sighed. "Alright, Lola, we're gonna need you to paint the—"

"Uh, hello?" Lola interrupted. "In _this_ skirt and _this_ top? I don't think so. I can't afford to mess up these clothes."

Lacey gave the queen bee a blank look. "You're kidding. I'm really, really hoping you're kidding."

Lola raised a thin eyebrow. "Do I _look_ like I'm kidding?"

"Dude," Lacey groaned. "We've been working for over an hour and all you've done is gotten us some lemonade. You're gonna have to pitch in and do something worthwhile, for a change."

Lola pretended to examine her nails. "Yeah, about that, _see_, I'm already a pretty damn valuable member of this team, so you can't afford to boot me off. So, I would cut out the verbal chew-out, before it comes back to screw you over, alrighty?"

"Listen, you—" Lacey snarled, but Jack stepped in front of the two girls, keeping them apart.

"Hey," Jack said firmly, "we've got to get this place done and ready. We're going to win this challenge. Lola, grab a paintbrush and help out. You can wear my sweatshirt to keep your top clean. Lacey, don't get at Lola's throat…at least wait until the end of the challenge, got it?"

The two girls looked at Jack, and then each other, and sighed.

"Got it," they said in unison.

"Good." Jack nodded and let the two girls resume their duty. Lacey seemed a bit surprised that Lola did, in fact, pick up a paint brush and start to help out, as soon as she was told where to go. She raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

All the while, a certain Hispanic party girl was watching them with excitement.

**(Caribou Coffee Cam: Fire the CANON!)**

** Glisa—**"Ay! I think Lola likes Jack! But what makes it _muy interesante_…I think Lacey likes Jack too! It's a love triangle, _mis amigos_! I already made shirts!" _(She holds up two shirts—one says 'Team Lacey' the other says 'Team Lola'._)

_(A random Caribou customer leans into Glisa's shot.)_

**Mystery coffee lover—**"Isn't it megalomaniac to try and control the love lives of others, before they've even made their own decision?"

**Glisa—**"Sure! But I'm not controlling their love lives, I'm just supporting what I've seen between _tres _teens and I'm excitedly watching the romance unfold! Um…and who are you, _tipo?"_

**Mystery coffee lover—**"I blow in with the wind and I'm gone before the dust clears. I am left, right, and north-east. I liked American Super Mario Bros 2 better than Super Mario Bros 3. I…am…the—"

**Glisa—**"I think it's time for you to get out of my shot…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Meanwhile, Chelsea and Arlen were still trying their best to attract customers to their team's arcade. Things weren't going so well…

"Maybe we should make a catchy jingle," Arlen suggested, as he and Chelsea strolled down one street. "What rhymes with arcade?"

"Err…" Chelsea knitted her eyebrows together. "Lemonade?"

Abruptly, Arlen burst out into tone-deaf song: "_Coooome to our arcaaaaade and we'll maaaaake you lemonaaaaaade_! How was that?"

Chelsea was too busy trying to get her hearing back to respond.

"Ah," Arlen groaned. "Dang it…we are seriously in need of customers! I'm almost considering tackling people to the ground and throwing them in the damn place."

"Please don't do that," Chelsea muttered, rubbing her temples.

"Well, they'd have fun once they were inside!" Arlen insisted. Chelsea didn't waver, so Arlen sighed again. "Fine…well, if we want to get people's attention there's always one song nobody can resist singing…"

"I'm afraid to ask what it is…" Chelsea said.

Arlen cupped his hands around his mouth and began singing even louder than before: "_Just a small town girl! Livin' in a lonely wo-orld!"_

"_She took the midnight train going anywhere_!" Someone else joined in, from across the street.

"_Just a city boy_!" More people were singing; Chelsea was looking around in shock.

And soon enough, the whole street was singing—and Arlen was adding his own 'choreography'. If you readers saw the actual dancing, you'd realize why we put quotation marks around the word choreography.

"_DON'T! STOP! BE-LIE-VIN'! HOLD ONTO THE FEE-LI-I-ING!"_

"How are we supposed to get them to the arcade?" Chelsea asked.

"We'll act like the Piped Popper!" Arlen replied, "and lead them to the arcade during the song!"

"You mean the _Pied Piper_, right?"

"Whatever!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Kit-Kat was hurrying back and forth from the kitchen to the club outside. It was only half an hour into their club's opening, but it was becoming surprisingly popular. There was a steady flow of customers in and out, and the heroes seemed to be making quite a profit from charging admission.

Turns out, the Rosetta-Damion-Glisa advertising team had attracted a surprisingly large amount of customers (mostly thanks to the slapstick moment they had shared). Seth and Bren had enticed their own fair share of customers as well. When Seth was unconscious, Bren told people, very convincingly, that Seth would probably die if they did not go to the club and spend a lot of money.

Also, Bren and Seth had succeeded in driving away some villain customers. They had wandered closer to the villains' territory and then, very innocently, they shouted: "It's pretty amazing how they've managed to not vacuum that place since _1971_…"

Glisa, too, had returned, although it had not been for quite a while. For reasons the heroes were unsure of, she was giggling like mad and hopping up and down.

The heroes were now showing a marathon of Monty Python movies, putting out pastries, and chatting with their customers.

Kit-Kat was pulling cinnamon rolls out of the oven just when a quiet voice called out her name. Despite the volume, Kit-Kat was so jumpy that she still dropped the tray. It was caught by Long—the one who had spoken—but he immediately thrust the tray away from him and began hopping around in a very un-Long-like manner.

"Long! I just pulled those out of the oven!" Kit-Kat said nervously. "Oh my gosh…are your hands alright?"

"They're fine, they're fine," Long said weakly. "I'm not sure how that eluded me…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out, I was just hoping you were doing alright. You're being worked so hard, here; it's amazing you're able to keep up."

Kit-Kat blushed. "Thanks, Long…I really appreciate you coming back here. If I had to stay back here any longer, I probably would've had to start talking to the oven, in some desperate need for company…"

"That's not something to worry about," Long assured her, cracking a sheepish grin, as he wrapped her in a hug. "What's to worry about is when the oven starts talking back…"

"Well, good thing you saved me from a mental breakdown, huh?" Kit-Kat questioned.

"I suppose I came just in time…" Long agreed.

The two of them leaned forward to kiss each other, but they both jumped when there was a huge crash from outside. The two of them ran out to see what had happened. A tearful Rosetta was pointing at Seth, while an angry Bren stood by his friend's side, looking defensive.

"You screwed up _everything_!" Rosetta screamed. As Kit-Kat looked around the room, it seemed to be that Rosetta had lashed out and whipped a plate down to the ground.

Kit-Kat looked to Long, worriedly. "What's going on?"

A morose Damion walked up to the two. "A series of events, really…Aaron has that caricature of Riley F. up on the wall…Rosetta started feeling really nervous and sad as she thought about…whatever happened during their breakup. And then she found out that Seth wants to win over Riley S. She's so bitter about the breakup, hearing about a budding relationship that involves the guy that showed the world how bad Riley F. really was…" Damion shook his head.

"Someone should stop her!" Kit-Kat insisted. "She…someone might get hurt!"

"Rosetta won't hurt anybody," Damion said weakly. "This…this isn't her, I swear…but I don't know what to do. She's been bottling all this stuff inside…it was bound to explode eventually."

"Why did you have to tell us about that stupid pit?" Rosetta shouted at Seth, clenching her fists at her sides. "Why couldn't you just have…?"

"Have what?" Bren interjected. "Kept it to himself? Let Riley keep screwing other contestants over? Would you honestly rather not know what Riley had been up to—what he would have _still_ been up to?"

"YES!" Rosetta cried out. "Everything…" she was stumbling; taking steps backwards now, "everything had been going so perfectly…" she wiped her eyes with her sleeve and, ran out of the restaurant without another word.

The whole room was silent for a long time.

"So…giving us a soap opera too, huh?" One customer questioned.

The heroes narrowed their eyes at him.

"Alright, you're out of here," Jess said gruffly. She hoisted the customer up and shoved him outside.

"That was…" Long shook his head. "Where is Rosetta going, exactly?"

"I don't know…poor Rosetta…" Damion sighed.

"Poor Rosetta?" Kit-Kat echoed. "Poor Seth. He did what was right but ends up paying a price anyways."

"I guess that's true…still…" Damion paused, and grimaced. "Does something smell like it's burning?"

Kit-Kat stayed silent for a moment, sniffing, and then widened her eyes. "Something's on fire! The kitchen! Oh crap…guys…we've got to get out of here!"

Frantic, the heroes began herding people out of their restaurant.

"Does this mean we get a refund?" One customer asked, scowling at the heroes as she sat stubbornly on the couch.

"GET OUT!" Kit-Kat screamed.

"Fine, fine, I'm going!" The lady shouted, peeved.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Well, we're officially screwed," Lola growled, throwing her hands up in the air with annoyance. "We've got, like, twenty people in here. That's not gonna be enough to beat the heroes!"

"Give it some time!" Jack assured her, as he hopped up on the prize booth counter. "We've got a while yet. Trust me, we're gonna win this thing."

"Well, unless a miracle happens, we're gonna have to find some scapegoat…" Lola chuckled sinisterly. Unfortunately, a certain loner walked by the two at that moment, and Lola clapped her hands together. "Zane! You'll be perfect!"

Confused, Zane looked from Jack and Lola, then sighed, shook his head, and walked away. "I knew I should've kept hiding behind the crane machine…"

Meanwhile, Zarya sat on a chair near one end of the room, reading. She then raised her head as soon as he heard a familiar rumbling, and slowly edged towards the nearest escape in the back of the arcade.

They were all there. The entire mass of fan-girls, at the arcade's front door. One girl stepped forward and brandished a flyer, looking at the place with curiosity.

"Is this the arcade?" She asked Jack. Surprised, and a tad confused, he nodded. "That Russian girl—who, by the way, is a LYING MEANIE LIAR—dropped these fliers on the street and we picked them up. Mind if we come in? We're actually kind of curious to check this place out."

Jack tilted his head to observe the mass of people at the door. Upon seeing just how many there were, he was suddenly all charm. "Come on in, ladies!"

"Sweet!" The girl waved the others in, and soon enough, the place was swarming with tweens.

"Fan-girls saving the day…" Lacey chuckled, glancing towards Sienna. "Who would've thunk it?"

Sienna laughed and nodded. "Not the most dramatic ending, I have to admit."

"We can always make it more exciting in the retelling," Lacey suggested.

"A difficult task," Sienna remarked, "when all we did was vamp up an arcade. Up for the task?"

Lacey knocked fists with her queen bee buddy. "Always, my friend!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

A few hours following that, Chris gathered the teens up to the Hummingbird Hollow sign to tell them how it went.

"Well," Chris began. "The heroes were in the lead…unfortunately, that's when they set the place on fire. Villains, thanks to your swarm o' fan-girls…you managed to snag the lead. Then again, considering the heroes almost blew up their restaurant—"

"Dat is _un poco _bit exaggeration…" Glisa said, cautiously.

"The win wasn't gonna be that hard to get, in any case!" Chris chuckled. "Now then…let's hop in to the Boat of Losers and head home for elimination! By the way…are we missing any campers?"

"Riley and Logan," Seth mumbled, still looking greatly saddened by the fight that had happened earlier today. Rosetta had made it back to the group, but she kept her eyes glued to the ground, not saying anything.

"Well, where the heck are they?" Chris groaned.

(**WHERE THE HECK THEY WERE):**

"Okay, dudes, seriously…" A curly haired, pimply teenager was standing near the exit of the shop, looking aggravated. "I need to close up! Can you put those stupid lightsabers away?"

"NEVER!" Logan and Riley shouted in unison, still engaged in their duel.

Riley's cell phone rang. She held a finger up to Logan, who paused mid-lightsaber-slash. Riley took out her cell phone and answered it. "Hello? Yeah we're…no, I didn't realize…oh, crap…be there in a sec…" she pocketed the phone, set the lightsaber down, and gave Logan a nasty glare. "We shall continue this…at a later moment in time!" She declared, before running right out the door.

Unsure what else to do, Logan put down his lightsaber and followed.

"Um…goodbye?" The worked mumbled, confusedly. He then sniffled to himself. "They were the closest things I had to friends…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

** (Later that evening):**

The ten heroes sat near the campfire, awaiting their elimination ceremony with dread. It was a tired rut—the challenge had ended, only to stir up even more drama and pain.

Chris walked up to the heroes, his teeth glinting with his grin, and showed the heroes his tray of marshmallows.

"I have in my hand, nine marshmallows…" he announced. "One of you will not being receiving a marshmallow. If you don't get one, you will be sent to the Dock of Shame, then to the Boat of Losers…and finally, to the Playa Des Losers! It's like musical chairs…but with marshmallows. Now then: an interesting turn of events. The girls seemed to be the one to screw up this challenge most of all, so, because of that…all the dudes are safe!"

Seth, Bren, Damion, Aaron, and Long all caught their marshmallows.

"Now then…girls…" Chris chuckled. "Riley…wherever you went, it prevented you from helping out your team. Glisa, you too, ditched out for quite a few hours. Jess, you were there, but you didn't _do_ anything. But, despite all that…you three are safe."

The girls caught their marshmallows.

"Kit-Kat and Rosetta…" Chris mused, spinning his tray around with glee. "Rosetta, you threw a temper tantrum near the end of the challenge and stormed out. Kit-Kat, your kitchen was on fire…and not in the cool way! The final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Rosetta."

Rosetta caught her marshmallow, but threw it in the fire soon after.

"No…" Long moaned, burying his head in his hands.

"Rules are rules dude," Chris told Long, shrugging. "Your girlfriend is O-U-T, OUT!"

True to his words, Chef emerged from the shadows and began herding Kit-Kat to the Boat of Losers.

"Long!" Kit-Kat called out. "I'll miss you! Win it for me, okay?"

"Kit-Kat! You actually made this show tolerable!" Long shouted back, and the two lovebirds gave each other sad smiles before Chef drove the Boat of Losers of, carrying the pastry chef away as she gave her teammates a sad wave goodbye.

"I didn't vote for her…" Seth whispered. "Did you guys?" He looked towards his two good friends, but they both shook their heads. "How did this happen?"

**(Confession Cam: Back and better than ever!)**

** Before the elimination:**

** Long—**"I'm voting for Rosetta. She's too emotional right now, it's gonna cause us trouble in future challenges."

**Kit-Kat**—_(Sighs.) _"This did not end well…I'm gonna have to vote for Rosetta…I'm sorry…"

**Rosetta—**_(Looks at the camera, desperately.) _"I had a temper tantrum…an actual temper tantrum…God; this is not supposed to be happening…I have to vote for Kit-Kat. I can't go to the Playa Des Losers…"

**Seth—**"I am not gonna let this fight go on, I have to make things right—I don't care what it takes! I can't vote Rosetta off; I'm not ending things like this. I vote for Jess."

**Riley—**"Yeah, the alliance between Seth, Bren, and I is not going well—we don't agree on anything, and we're not exactly Heather-esque enough to manipulate each other." _(Smirks, half-heartedly.) _"All that stuff Seth said when he was loopy, though…I'm so confused…" _(She shakes her head, dismissively.) _"I'm voting for Kit-Kat. We could've won this…"

**Bren—**"I vote for Glisa. Did we ever find out where she went?"

**Damion—**"I vote for Kit-Kat. I know this show is called Total _Drama_, but we have to resolve all this fighting and _nonsense_. We have to wrap up these loose ends. Wouldn't want to do a TDWT sort of ending, now would we?"

**?—**"Sorry to interrupt the elimination confessions, but _seriously_. Could you _have_ a bigger OMGWTFBBQ sort of finale?"

**Aaron—**"I vote for Kit-Kat…" _(He sniffles, and buries his heads in his hands.) _"MY BEAUTIFUL PAINTINGS! ALL GONE! JESS DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE THE CROCODILE PICTURE!"

**Glisa—**"Aye…not a good ending. I will vote for Riley…but _no me gusta_ this whole situation…"

**Jess—**"I don't want anybody here gone, damn it! I'm voting for Chris! I don't care if this vote counts or not! Kit-Kat is my friend, Rosetta is my friend, the guys are all good people, the girls are all good people…yet everything is still getting screwed up!" _(She kicks the side of the confession wall.) _"How does this keep happening?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: Back-to-back; Kit-Kat's last words)**

** Kit-Kat—**_(Takes a deep breath before starting.) _"I've been thinking about it…but really, this is for the best. I'm almost glad I'm leaving. I'm gonna miss Long like crazy, but…things are really bad between the heroes, and if I have to go to in order for things to patch up…then that's for the best. Things will be fine. I sure hope…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Rough episode, eh?" Chris questioned, as he walked into the control room with Chef.

To Chris's confusion, Chef was sniffling.

"That Kit-Kat…such a trooper…just filmed her last confession…she never got to teach me how to make brownies!" He wailed.

"Dude!" Chris groaned, annoyed. "It's just an elimination! Sheesh. But we've got to do something to simmer things down. As much as I love me some drama, there's too much of a good thing. So…I think it's time to break out the big guns." Chris paused for a moment. "I didn't mean actual guns, Chef, please put the bazooka down…"

"Sorry," Chef apologized.

"Anyways!" Chris continued. "I think it's time for _that_ challenge…"

"You mean…?" Chef began, wide-eyed.

Chris nodded, chuckling deviously all the while.

"That's right. We're gonna need instruments, instrumental CDs, a karaoke machine…and a few flamethrowers."

Chef raised an eyebrow.

"Right, my mistake," Chris corrected himself. "A _lot_ of flamethrowers."

**Vote count:**

** Kit-Kat**—Four

**Rosetta**—Two

**Riley—**One

**Glisa—**One

**Jess—**One

**Invalid (sorry, Jess)**—One

**(A.N.) (1) **I'm pretty neutral about Ezekiel; I don't see where the hype comes from. I like the fanfiction-Ezekiel, but he hasn't really shown any signs of being that sort of person in the series. Still, he didn't deserve what happened to him…anyways…

AH. DRAMA.

Err…I guess it's more like: AH. EVEN MORE DRAMA.

I hope you all enjoyed the chapter, and I hope you guys aren't too upset over Kit-Kat's elimination. This Riley-Rosetta nonsense will be over soon, I _promise_.

In other news! There is no other news!

So, I guess that's goodbye! Please review if you get the chance, and thanks you all for reading!


	11. Wawanakwa Sings the Blues

**(A.N.) **(FANFICTION TURNED THIS CHAPTER INTO A GIANT BLOCK OF TEXT I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING I HAD TO GO BACK AND FIX IT ALL.) So! School is hard, cross country is tiring, but I'm hanging in there, and I hope you guys are too! Enjoy the update!

This chapter is brought to you by: shameless fourth-wall breaks. Seriously, I'm pretty sure the fourth wall is gonna need some intensive care after this chapter…or at least a band-aid.

()()()()()()()()()()

"Previously, on _Gilmore Girls_—wait, no, wrong show…um…" Chris cleared his throat, and continued his recap.

"Last time, on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains…!

"The campers made their way to lovely Hummingbird Hollow where they turned two abandoned buildings into customer-attracting hotspots! The villains got an arcade while the heroes received an old restaurant. The villains worked together well—although, Logan got caught in a duel with Riley after he pushed Seth off of a huge hill, and Glisa discovered a love triangle in the making between Lacey, Lola, and Jack…

"The heroes were doing well with their restaurant, but Rosetta exploded at Seth for ending her relationship with Riley and stormed out. Soon after, the heroes' hopes went up in flames—_literally_. Kit-Kat accidentally set the place on fire!

"The heroes lost, and Kit-Kat, our lovable pastry chef, was sent home. So…what will happen with this love triangle? Will Rosetta and Seth reconcile? And seriously, is it possible for these crazy kids to go one challenge without starting another major fight? Here's a hint: no.

"But stay tuned anyways, because we'll have the most dramatic campfire ceremony _yet_, right here…on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains!"

()()()()()()()()()

Aaron sprinted down the length of the dock, taking off into a jump at the end and hollering: "_YAHOO_!"

Seth followed his actions, all the while shouting: "_GOOGLE_!" Bren and Damion jumped in as well (in a slightly less enthusiastic manner). Long, unfortunately, had again become more closed off, ever since Kit-Kat was voted off. The hero boys weren't completely sure where he was, now.

"Ready for the challenge today, guys?" Bren asked his teammates, popping his head out of the water.

Damion wrinkled his nose. "Do we have to mention that? I'd prefer to put off thinking about it until the last possible second…"

"Challenges have been…relatively harmless so far…right?" Seth questioned. "At least none of us have been mortally injured. That seems like an improvement from the other seasons."

"Yeah, but there are a lot of challenges left…" Aaron said wistfully. "For some of us, anyways. Here's to hoping we don't lose today!"

"Again," Bren muttered sourly.

"We're not really in a losing streak though," Damion commented. "I mean, we've lost three, and the villains have lost three. Today's challenge will break that tie, I guess. Seems we don't have any more reward challenges this season. Even if there is a reward, it still comes with an elimination for the losing team."

"I wonder what the challenge today is…" mused Seth. "We've been all over the place this season."

"Yeah, I'm still waiting for the time where Chris will actually take us somewhere actually _enjoyable_," Bren remarked, shaking his head as he moved his arms to keep himself afloat.

Damion gave Bren a grin. "Hummingbird Hollow wasn't your style?"

Bren smirked. "Yeah, personally I'd rather spend my hours in Platypus Pillars, or Dingo Dynasty…"

"Platypus Pillars sounds epic!" Aaron declared, floating on his back past the two of them. "Let's go _there_!"

"Awkward segue," Damion announced, "but have you guys seen Long and Rosetta around, anywhere? I swear, I've barely seen them since our last campfire ceremony."

Seth looked downward, guiltily. "They've made themselves scarce since the elimination," he said. "I feel so bad…"

"Dude, it's not your fault," Bren assured him. "Rosetta freaked out, but she's…fairly sane, at least. Now that she's had her explosion, I think all that's really left for her is to just…get over it." He shrugged. "Sorry, I don't mean to sound totally cold-hearted or anything, but…"

"And Long is back in his shell," Damion commented, shaking his head to himself. "Poor guy! Kit-Kat was really helping him open up!"

"I know how he feels," Seth agreed. "It sucks to lose your girlfriend so early…" he turned red. "Not that…Riley was—is—_err_…yeah, I'm just gonna shut up..."

"The whole 'winning-Riley-over' thing not going so smooth?" Damion asked, sympathetically.

"We're working on it," Bren chuckled. "Ever since loopy-Seth confessed his undying love for Riley, he's turned into a bit of a blabbering mess whenever he's around her."

Seth scowled, and rubbed the back of his head. "It's not _that_ bad."

"The last time you tried to talk to her you ended up complimenting her socks and then running away," Bren pointed out. Seth groaned, miserably.

Aaron paddled in-between the two of them. "Seth, dude, just follow my advice! Just do something awesome in a challenge to impress her!"

"You _guys_," Damion sighed, impatiently, "All these secret plans and tactics are ri_diculous_. Why don't you just go up to Riley and ask her out?"

Seth shrugged, and smiled. "What about you and Mo? Or Aaron and Jess?"

"I'm working on it!" Aaron grumbled, defensively.

"Well, I don't have a romantic interest," Bren said dully, as he lazily started to drift away from the boys. "So if you need me…I'll be over there."

Damion looked at Seth, then Aaron. "Jeez, we're kind of cowards, aren't we?"

"Well, it's harder than you'd think," Seth sighed. "We're not exactly the 'bad-boy' type—"

"The mullet might mislead some folks," Bren remarked from a distance.

"So we're not quite as forward with the flirting…" Seth continued. "Plus, Riley could say 'no' if I asked her out…and then it'd be really awkward to even be friends with her!" Seth finished, throwing his hands up in the air. "What's a guy to do?"

"Go in a corner, eat some sugar cookies, and cry a little?" Aaron sniffled.

"…no, it's probably not that," Seth replied, awkwardly. "But…I don't know, it's just too much to think about right now, between all this drama and the stress of winning the challenges. Maybe we've just got to wait for our opportunity."

"Smart words," Damion agreed. He knitted his eyebrows together. "Too bad Mo and I never got a chance…"

"You'll have your chance," Aaron told his friend, cheerfully. "There's still the Playa des Losers, when-or-if you'll get sent there. It's not like you'll never see him again."

"But for now…" Seth sighed, and looked at his teammates. "Our focus has got to be on winning the challenges…not our crushes. Deal?"

Reluctantly, the other two boys nodded. "Deal."

**(Confession Cam: NO DEAL! NO DEAL!)**

** Bren—**"It's an interesting thing to watch from the sidelines. Three guys, three love crises. And that's just on this team. Damion lost Mo, Jess can't take Aaron seriously, and Seth is just plain hopeless in love. As for me…well…I can't find my toothbrush…" _(He shrugs.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Just as the boys had made it back to their cabin and changed into their clothes, Chris's voice came over the intercom:

"_Attention, campers_! _Today's challenge is gonna start in twenty minutes exactly, so bring your shining smiling faces to the mess hall in EXACTLY twenty minutes. Not twenty-one minutes. Not forty-seven minutes. TWENTY minutes. And not any of that 'my-clock-doesn't-have-the-right-time' crap, because we are on a tight schedule, people! Get down here in twenty minutes—well, actually nineteen minutes now…just don't be late!"_

The intercom clicked off.

"So…" Jess, in her bunk in the girls' cabin, drawled lazily, "thirty minutes, then…?"

Still sleepy (although it was about 9:30) Riley yawned and turned over in her bed. "I could've sworn he said forty…"

"C'mon, _chicas_!" Glisa exclaimed, dashing over to her teammates' bunks. "We must face dis challenge with readiness!"

"I haven't even had breakfast yet," Riley murmured, gradually moving upright and rubbing her eyes. "Eugh…I'm still recovering from that 5:00 hike."

"Dat was two days ago," Glisa pointed out.

"Yeah, but it left some emotional scars…" Riley sighed, but she was finally starting to crawl out of her bunk. She cracked her neck and gave Glisa a weary grin. "All right then, I guess we should start getting ready, eh Jess?"

There was no response. Riley raised an eyebrow and looked to her left. "Jess?"

Snoring could be heard from underneath her covers.

"Holy freaking llamas, that was quick," Riley commented, an eyebrow raised. Glisa nodded, wide-eyed. "I'm a little scared of waking her up. You wanna do it?"

Glisa jumped back. "No way, compadre!"

"Oh fine," Riley sighed. She edged over to Jess's bunk and gently tapped the prankster on the shoulder. "Jess. Hey, Jess. Time to get up."

"Keep touching me and I will bite off your hand," came the mumbled reply.

Riley took a few cautionary steps backwards, but persevered:

"The challenge is gonna start soon. You're either getting up now or we're gonna have Glisa perform a drum solo for you." Groaning, Jess rolled off the side of her bed, to the floor, where she glared at Riley and Glisa with tired eyes.

Riley gave her an awkward smile. "C'mon. Three red bulls and you'll feel as good as new."

Jess smirked, and gradually got herself up to a standing position. "Sounds like a plan…"

()()()()()()()()

Chef watched the teens enter the mess hall, scowling to himself. The teens all shuffled in and sat at their respective tables, before starting some tepid conversation with each other. Chef shook his head to himself and slowly retreated into his kitchen.

**(Confession Cam: Sympathy in here? What a novel concept!)**

** Chef—**"Poor kids got too much on their minds…they've gotta cut back on the subplots, man…"

()()()()()()()()()

"Whoa…" Logan, who had been dozing off on the bench, snapped back into reality when Chef laid down a platter in front of the villains. "Food? There's _food_ here? Did I die? Damn it, that 'mafia' thing actually killed me!"

"That was like, five chapters ago," Sienna chided. "Nobody is gonna have a clue what you're talking about. But still…" she nodded at the breakfast in front of them, wide-eyed. "Finally, we get something…_edible_." On the platter on the villains' (and heroes') tables, there was an assortment of bagels and pastries. Soon after, Chef gave the teams some orange juice, cream cheese, and peanut butter.

"Finally," Arlen groaned, quickly swiping up a danish. "I had forgotten what real food looked like."

"What's the catch here, Chef?" Jack asked, suspiciously.

"Just shut up and eat yer damn food, boy!" Chef growled. Jack shrugged, and did as he was told.

"This day's starting out on a good note," Lacey chuckled, as she spread some cream cheese on a bagel half. Not a second later, Chris burst through the doors.

"Mornin', campers!" He exclaimed.

"_And_…good note over," Lacey remarked, sarcastically.

Chris raised an eyebrow, but ignored Lacey, and continued: "Hope you guys are prepared for a _wicked_ challenge! You guys get to show off your musical skills today!" There were some definitely mixed reactions in the room—some excited, some terrified, and Zane and Zarya didn't do much except sigh a bit.

**(Confession Cam: Dancin' at the zombie zoo…)**

** Zane—**"An interesting prospect…although, to be honest, nobody seems that interested in listening to piano music…" _(He pauses for a bit, then sighs and continues.) _"Y'know, I should eventually say something in the presence of _other people_…"

()()()()()()()()()()

"So, here is the dealio," Chris chuckled. "You're gonna have two groups of people in each team: the 'performers' and the 'groupies'. The performers will be the ones who—"

"Wait, no, I got this," Jess interrupted. "Let me guess…they play hopscotch?"

"Close." Chris rolled his eyes. "The performers will perform in front of me and Chef. The groupies will do all the work for the performers…while, of course, the performers get all the glory. Don't ya love show biz? Now, here's the dilemma: the more acts your team has, the more your score can go up. But…groupies need to do everything by themselves, and if any performer so much as picks up a pen that a groupie dropped…your team will lose a point!"

"Doesn't that seem kinda harsh?" Seth asked, but then he sighed and shook his head. "Never mind, dumb question…"

**(Confession Cam: We're seriously running out of captions)**

** Riley—**"Am I the only one who's picturing Chris running around, shouting things like: _'Fifty points from Gryffindor!' _or something like that?" _(She grins, widely.)_

()()()()()()()()()()

"So, go ahead and divide into your groups!" Chris told the campers. "When you're done…groupies, head out and meet Chef by the edge of the woods, near the Confession Cam. Performers, you'll be staying here with me!"

The heroes and the villains drew closer together, then, to see who had any musical talent.

"So, who can do what over here?" Jack questioned the villains. "I sing and play guitar."

"I play bass guitar, I sing, and I can make parody songs," Lacey spoke up.

"I…play piano…" Zane mumbled.

"And I sing," Zarya added quietly. "In Russian and English."

"As do I," Sienna added. "Well, not Russian. I'm an alright singer, I suppose."

"I am an awesome rapper, dudes," Arlen announced.

"And I am a _wonderful_ singer," Lola boasted, smirking.

"Sorry to say, I don't really do anything…" Chelsea chuckled awkwardly.

"Same here!" Logan laughed.

**(Confession Cam: Do re mi…)**

** Logan—**"Okay, I play the flute, but that is NOT getting out on here, okay? No one is gonna know that I play the flute! Got it, millions of TV viewers?" _(He pauses for a second.) _"Wait a second…_crap_…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hooray for no musical talent," Chelsea laughed, and the two high-fived.

"Well, that's seven performers and two groupies," Jack remarked. "That's…not equal."

"Look at you and your crazy math skills," Lacey snickered.

Jack, embarrassed, crossed his arms stubbornly. "Shut up."

"I'll be a groupie," Sienna sighed, reluctantly. "I'm okay, but not _great_ at singing, so…"

"First you volunteer to paint, then you volunteer to not be at the center of the attention?" Lacey exclaimed, jokingly punching Sienna on the shoulder. "You are surprising me more and more."

"And I won't stop," Sienna retorted, smirking.

"So, three groupies and six performers…" Jack mused. "I think that'll be okay…right?"

Chelsea shrugged, and grinned. "Sounds good to me. Do we groupies get T-shirts? We should practice our squealing. Logan, how are you on squealing?"

"Ready and able," Logan chuckled, with a mock salute to the pyro.

Over at the heroes' table, talent was about as heavy as…Owen.

"Well, I sing," Jess told her fellow heroes. "How about you guys?"

"I also sing," Seth said, a little awkwardly. "Any instrument players?"

"Yeah, I play the drums," Riley replied, with a little smile.

Rosetta, who had been unsurprisingly quiet during breakfast, raised her voice, hesitantly. "I play keys and sing a bit."

Seth, hoping to ease things between the whole team, kept things moving along: "Great! Okay, so we've got four performers. Anybody else?"

"I dance, sing, and play the violin!" Glisa announced cheerfully.

"I sing too," Damion chimed in.

Long kept his head glued to the table. "I don't really do anything…"

"I have some mad whistling skills," Aaron announced. "But no one's appreciative of that anymore…" he sniffled.

Jess patted him on the back. "We appreciate it, buddy."

"Yeah, admittedly, I'd be better suited as a groupie," Bren admitted. "So, should it be me, Long, and—no offense—Aaron?"

Seth nodded. "Sounds good. Is there a certain amount of performances we're supposed to do, or what?"

"As many as you want! Campers can go solo or they can pair up with another camper," Chris answered, stopping near the table. "The performances will be rated on a scale of one to ten. Obviously, higher score wins. This ain't Hearts or golf, here."

"Phew," Jess replied, cynically. "I was getting worried for a second."

Chris glared at Jess before continuing. "Anyways…groupies, head with Chef. The rest of you performers stay here. We've got to get you…" he chuckled, ominously, "_ready_…for the show."

Absolutely disturbed, the heroes exchanged glances.

Hesitantly, Damion raised his hand. "Can I switch to a groupie…please…?"

"Nope!" Chris replied, cheerfully. "Now then—everybody, to your places! Let's get this show on the road!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Chelsea, Sienna, Logan, Bren, Long, and Aaron went over to the woods to meet with Chef and see what their first task would be. Once they saw Chef with an armful of maps, they knew they were screwed.

"Navigation…not my forte…" Aaron lamented, as he took the map that Chef handed him. "So, what're we after, Chef? Hidden treasure?"

"Heh," Chef chuckled. "Fat chance, boy. You guys have to find all the instruments and machinery that your performers will need and bring it back to the stage. These maps show the paths through the forest, and the spots that you'll find the instruments are labeled. Got it?"

"Is there a time limit?" Sienna asked.

"Nah, but you're gonna wanna make it snappy," replied Chef. "Sooner you get the instruments back, the sooner the performers can play."

"Alright then we should probably…" Bren's voice died out as he looked around the group. "Huh. Long's gone again."

"Seriously?" Aaron exclaimed, whipping his head around the surroundings. "He just had to pull a ninja right now? I mean, that's pretty cool, but still! Where'd he go?" The trio of the villains, chuckling in a fairly villainous manner, walked away, leaving the baffled heroes to ponder their missing teammate's whereabouts.

"That sentence had too many words," Chef grumbled under his breath.

"Ah, well, at least we've got the map," Bren said lightly, as he and Aaron began to venture in the woods.

"For now," Chef chuckled.

Aaron turned around, confusion on his face. "What was that?"

Chef waved them away. "Nothing! Get your butts moving!"

()()()()()()()()()

Lacey clenched her teeth together, pointing a finger of RAGE at the narcissistic host in front of her. "You're making us wear outfits that you picked out for us? There is no freaking way that I am agreeing to this."

"You haven't even seen them yet!" Chris objected.

"Yeah, but you're _Chris_, dude," Jack sighed, massaging his forehead. "We can guess."

"Well, what are you supposed to perform in? Your lame old regular outfits?" Chris complained.

"Yup," Jess replied, and continued in a deadpan: "Just like you host in your lame old outfit with your lame old five-o'-clock shadow in this lame old campground on this lame old island in Canada."

"Lame old Canada?" Damion asked.

Jess shook her head. "Nah…just Canada."

"Well, _I'm_ the host, and you have to do what _I_ say!" Chris announced. "So…nyeh!" He stuck his tongue out at the campers.

**(Confession Cam: Brooklyn rage!)**

** Riley—**_(Raises an eyebrow.) _"Did Chris just retrogress into a two-year-old?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Following lots of arguing and shouting, the campers finally took their outfits (still bagged) and disappeared into their cabins to change into them.

**(Confession Cam: Back so soon?)**

** Rosetta—**"We did something like this last year…each outfit kinda focused on a certain stereotype for each camper…some of them turned out fine but others…well, I'll give you three words: plastic bat wings." _(She gives the camera a half-hearted smirk.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

Lacey was the first to arrive back to the mess hall. She wore two tank tops over each other, a black one over a gray one. Lacey also wore dark blue jeans that were assaulted by a pair of scissors, with black spandex visible underneath the rips. Her boots were replaced with regular white sneakers, taking away the few extra inches that they had given her, and her burgundy-streaked hair was in a tight ponytail.

"Okay, so…this isn't bad…" Lacey commented awkwardly, although she still felt very guarded. "Seriously, this isn't even that much different from my regular outfit. Why are we doing this?"

Chris shrugged. "Take up some time?"

Lacey rolled her eyes, but took a seat.

Next to enter was Glisa, who wore a red Sgt. Pepper jacket, with black dress pants and black dress shoes. She entered the mess hall looking a tad woozy.

"Lookin' sharp!" Chris told her, grinning.

"Dis jacket…so tight…" she gasped, before stumbling over to her chair. "So dizzy…I see leprechauns…"

Lacey scowled and crossed her arms. "Is that a short joke?"

After Glisa, Rosetta entered. She was wearing a short-sleeved dark turquoise top, and long black-and-white striped fingerless gloves. She also wore black jeans, and a bottle-cap belt. She entered quickly, and sat down next to Glisa, biting her lip and staring at the tabletop.

Glisa smiled at her. "You look _fantastico_!"

"Thanks," Rosetta mumbled. "You do too."

Jack entered next, adjusting the fedora on his head with hesitation. He wore a white collared shirt with a black, untied tie. He also wore black pants and black dress shoes.

"Do you think it looks cooler untied," Lacey asked, "or are you just not sure how to tie it?" She grinned.

Jack laughed and sat next to her. "Both?"

After Jack came Arlen, wearing a white, unzipped jacket over a gray T-shirt and black baggy pants. He also wore his signature sideways baseball cap, and some jewelry that one might call "bling".

"Couldn't put a belt in the mix, Chris?" Jack asked, jokingly.

"C'mon, it wouldn't be an 'Arlen' outfit, then," Arlen replied, grinning.

Seth walked in then, wearing a black jacket buttoned once in the middle, over a yellow shirt, with black jeans.

"Hola, _**Señor**__Bumblebee_," Glisa greeted him, grinning as she bumped fists with the karate kid.

Seth chuckled and rubbed his head. "All I need are some antennas, huh?"

"_Precisamente_!" Glisa cackled. "Oh, hey, it's Riley!" Riley smiled at the heroes as she entered, wearing a Mountain Dew T-shirt, black jeans, and a black beanie.

"Mountain Dew…the king of all pops," Arlen mused, nodding, wide-eyed. "Nice shirt, dudette!"

"Well, thank you very much," Riley replied, grinning. "Problem is, now I'm really in the mood for some _Coke_…heeey, bumblebee, how's it going?" She sat on Seth's other side and smiled at him.

"Great!" Seth replied, in a slightly squeaky tone. "Nice shirt."

"Thanks…" Riley, still smiling, looked back at the door. Lola walked in, wearing a very…form-fitting, black dress that was on the 'short' end. The dress was dotted with hearts of different colors, and a big belt went around her waist. She walked through the mess hall on long heels with ease.

"Just got back from Sesame Street, eh Lola?" Lacey questioned, grinning mischievously. (1)

"Elmo says hi," Lola replied, with a wink. Jack widened his eyes, unable to help staring. Lacey noticed this, and awkwardly looked away, down towards the tabletop.

**(Confession Cam: Love triangles—the shape has three points, the concept has none) **

**Lacey**—"Unfortunately, if I had tried to wear that dress, it probably would've still gone down to my ankles. Ha, ha…" _(Chuckles, but after a moment, she sighs.)_

()()()()()()()()

Damion entered next, wearing an orange-and-white striped polo, and light blue jeans. The shirt had an Abercrombie and Fitch label on it.

"To be honest, I was surprised to find out that they even have clothes at Abercrombie and Fitch," Damion commented, as he sat down, "all their male models are always shirtless." He added, jokingly, "Not that I'm complaining." Soon after came Jess, who wore a short-sleeved purple T-shirt that exposed a bit of her midriff, and black jeans with more chains that necessary. Around her neck was a pair of headphones.

"The stupid thing is that I don't even have an iPod with me," she grumbled, gesturing to the headphones. "Damn accessory. At least I can put it on and have an excuse for ignoring people." She grinned, evilly. Zarya entered next, and seemed to be in a hurry to not be in the center of attention. She wore a long, buttoned up green coat that went down to her knees. She wore dark blue jeans underneath that. She quickly took her seat.

"I look like I'm hiding weapons underneath here…" she muttered under her breath. "Well, that's everyone," Chris announced. "Right?"

Jess held a thumb down. "Wrong. We're missing Zane."

"Well, what's taking him so long?" Chris complained.

**(Confession Cam: Déjà vu, for me and you) **

**Zane**—_(He's wearing a white/pink striped polo, white pants, and shades that cover his face. He slowly shakes his head and sighs.) _"The sunglasses cover my shame…"

_(From outside) _**Jess**—_(Bangs on the Confession Cam door.) _"Dude! Sorry, but you're gonna have to get your angst-ridden butt out here!"

**Zane**—_(Slumps his shoulders.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

"So, where's our first stop?" Bren asked, locking his fingers behind his head. Aaron squinted at the map, tracing the path they were taking with his finger.

"Okay, we take a left up here, and then…" a large gust of wind roared as it whipped through the trees, and the map was blown away from Aaron's hands, over the treetops.

"And then we lose our map," Bren finished, in a deadpan.

"Well, at least there aren't bears around!" Aaron said brightly. That sentence was soon followed by an angry growl from some nearby bushes. Bren slapped his forehead, and Aaron laughed, nervously and the two of them began to quickly walk away.

"Well, at least there aren't any _croco_—" Aaron began.

"Don't finish that sentence."

"…okay. Hey look, it's Long!" The two boys greeted Long nonchalantly, and then did a double-take once they realized that Long had not only reappeared but he had reappeared while carrying all of the heroes' instruments and machinery with him.

"Uh, need any help, dude?" Aaron asked. Long shrugged.

**(Confession Cam: We raise 'em tough!) **

**Aaron**—"Yeah, so, now that Kit-Kat is gone, Long seems to have reverted back to the silent dude who magically does all the work for us. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay," Chelsea mused, observing the map. "So, we've got…Lacey's bass guitar, Zane's keyboard, a karaoke machine, and three microphones." Chelsea herself was carrying the three microphones. Behind her, Sienna had slung the bass guitar over her shoulders, and she was also carrying the keyboard. Logan lugged the karaoke machine around.

"Ugh," Sienna muttered, grimacing as she hoisted up the keyboard. "This clunky thing is so awkward to carry around."

"I could take it for you," Logan offered, smirking as he flexed in a not-so-discreet way. "No sweat."

"Sounds good to me," Sienna said, nonchalantly, as she handed Logan they keyboard and draped the bass guitar over his shoulders. "Don't trip."

Logan staggered around a bit before regaining his balance and giving Sienna a thumbs-up. Sienna rolled her eyes, and smirked. The queen bee shook out her sore arms, and rubbed them.

"Thanks," she told Logan, after a moment.

Logan grinned at her mischievously. "What was that? I don't think I heard you. Can you say it a little louder?"

"Moron," Sienna muttered, before hastily leaving the bad boy to catch up with Chelsea.

"Aw, Sienna! Come on, wait up!" Logan complained, trying to catch up to her, but only succeeding in falling backwards.

"This is weird," Chelsea muttered, showing Sienna the map. "I thought we had everything, but there's another stop on our path."

"Really?" Sienna asked. "For what?"

"For a flute," Chelsea replied. She raised an eyebrow. "Which villain of ours plays the flute?"

Sienna turned around, to where Logan was still lying on his back, like a flipped-over turtle. "Hey, Logan! Know anybody who plays the flute?"

Logan's eye twitched, and he groaned to himself as he shouted back: "Nobody comes to mind!"

**(Confession Cam: Let me guess…Arlen, right?)**

** Logan—**"Chris, this is not cool, man. _Not_ cool. There is _no_ way I'm playing that damn flute!" _(He gives the camera the 'I'm-watching-you' sign.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hey," Jack greeted, sitting next to Lacey, who had her back against the side of the mess hall. "What're you writing?"

"Just a parody song," Lacey admitted, grinning. "I'm still trying to think of what angle to take with it. If I should make fun of the campers more, or the actual _show_…both are such easy targets."

"What song are you parodying?" Jack asked. He paused. "Parody…ing? That doesn't sound like a word. But whatever…"

Lacey raised an eyebrow and pulled her notebook closer to herself. "Sorry Jack, you're gonna have to wait like everybody else. That, and as of right now, it kind of sucks, so…"

"Oh, don't give me that bashful writer crap," Jack made a futile grab for the notebook, but Lacey rolled her eyes and held the notebook farther away from him.

"I'll beat you with this, if I have to," she threatened. "Don't you have your own performance to work on?"

"True," Jack, resignedly, slumped back down. "I'm not sure what I'm doing, though."

"I can help you with that," Lola offered, innocently walking onto the scene. "I need a second singer for my performance…can you help me, Jack?" Jack shrugged, smiled, stood up, and dusted himself off.

"Sure," he replied. "What are you singing?"

Lola chuckled. "Come here. You're gonna love it." Again, Jack shrugged, and walked away with the queen bee.

Lacey turned her attention back to her parody song. "Bye, I guess…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Seth glanced over the lyric sheet he had, and starting singing softly under his breath. "_Seasons are changing and waves are crashing and stars are falling all for us—"_

"Well, _that_ sounds suspiciously like a love song," Damion observed, popping into the boys' cabin. Seth nearly fell off of his bed.

"Eh heh…" Seth chuckled awkwardly. "Well, we said we'd wait for an opportunity right?"

Damion laughed. "Aw, don't worry about it. Do what you do to have to woo your lady love, I don't mind. Good luck, too. Your voice sounds very nice."

"Hey, thanks." Seth smiled. "What are you singing?"

Damion shrugged. "Still debating it."

"Fair enough. Just no Ke$ha, and I'll be fine…"

Damion nodded, and retreated, singing to himself: "_There's a place downtown, where the freaks all come around—"_

Seth rolled his eyes, and shouted at the exiting hero: "I'd throw a pie at you if I had one!" And then, after a moment: "Darn it, I miss Kit-Kat…she would have a pie for me…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Bren, Bren, Bren! Which wire goes where?" Aaron asked, flailing his arms around as he paced around the stage. Bren, who was connecting the microphones to the karaoke machine, held up a finger.

"Just a sec," he replied.

"What if I make something explode or if I electrocute myself and become Frankenstein or—"

**(Confession Cam: Cut the red wire! 3…2…1…boom?) **

**Bren**—"Only Aaron could make setting up a karaoke machine sound like he's disabling a bomb."

()()()()()()()()()

Bren stood up and walked over to help Aaron, while the villains walked on the scene.

"Why did both teams grab karaoke machines?" Chelsea asked.

"Maybe it's just in case one team couldn't find it…for…whatever reason," Sienna shrugged.

"Who knows," Logan (who was very grateful to drop the stuff he had to carry) chuckled, "maybe bears like karaoke machines as snacks."

**(Confession Cam: There was supposed to be a glorious _boom_!) **

**Bear**—_(In subtitles.) _"Personally, I prefer TiVos…or ABBA CDs."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Meanwhile, near the cabins, the performers were working hard. (_Or hardly working, har-har!_)

"I don't mean to alarm anyone," Zane sighed, as he breezed past some fellow villains, "but there's a bear in the Confession Cam…"

Lola looked up after a delayed moment. "Did you hear something?" She asked Jack, who shrugged in response.

()()()()()()()()()()()

**Later that night/evening/unspecified time period! **

Chris stood on the Wawanakwa stage, hands clasped together, with a wide grin on his face.

"Hey!" He greeted the audience. "We're comin' at you live, from Wawanakwa. Today, you'll see…well, I'm not sure how many performances, actually. But hey! There's music! So…" he glanced at the camera. "Man, I probably should have prepared something beforehand…let's just do this thing, okay? First up is…Arlen!"

Polite applause ensued, and Arlen, to the others' surprise, wheeled a whiteboard out to the stage.

"Yo!" He greeted the audience. "So, I thought, with school starting up and all—"

"I thought it was summer," Glisa whispered to Damion in the stands.

"Real world time," Damion whispered back. Glisa nodded.

"I thought I'd give the kids out there a good lesson," he finished, nodding. "With style!" With that, he grinned, and hit a button on the karaoke machine. A hip-hop beat poured out from the speakers, and…Arlen began to rap.

**(Arlen: "Fraction Jackson" by…Fraction Jackson.)**

_It's time for my favorite_

_It's time for some fractions_

_Some big, bootylicious style, math freaky action_

Bren raised an eyebrow. "Fractions are more scandalous than I remember."

_Put a number on bottom_ _a number on top_

_ Draw a line in between them and guess what you got—_

_That's right, it's a fraction! Easy as that!_

_ You can't mess with no fractions, fractions is PHAT!_

"Well, I guess if the fraction is bootylicious…" Jess commented dryly.

_I put down a four, then I write down a five_

_Then I straight draw a line and that fractions alive_

_Check it out, 92, and a big 107_

_ Draw a line through that motha', _

_I'm in fraction heaven!_

_What do these fractions equal in this mathematical profession?_

"368/535," Zane mumbled in reply.

_92…err…_Arlen examined the whiteboard with confusion, and then proclaimed: _THAT'S A TRICK QUESTION!_

"Never mind, then," Zane muttered.

_That's right, the number on top is the dominator_

_And the number on the bottom is the primerator_

"I'm really worried for the kids who watch this," Seth remarked.

_And the line between 'em is called the line between 'em_

"Should've seen that coming," Riley chuckled.

_You can ask anybody out there who's ever seen 'em!_

_Fractions are the bomb! Fractions are the best!_

_Indestructible, they can whisk down any test!_

_ Multiply this fraction by eight, step back from the whiteboard and wait_

_Erase the eight, and what'cha got left?_

_A fraction undefeatable and oh so deft_

_And if you add it by four, what's the answer, you're guessin'…_ _ THAT'S A TRICK QUESTION!_

"Is that his new catchphrase?" Jack asked, raising an eyebrow.

Much to the campers' astonishment…Arlen still was not finished.

_Now I know what you want to ask me brother,_

_ What if you got two fractions next to each other?_

_Well this fraction here says "Hello fraction there!"_

_ But this fraction over there pretends he doesn't care_

_So this fraction's like: "I'mma mess you up!"_

_And this fraction swings and hits 'em in the gut_

_ So the first fraction takes out a machine gun and shoots back_

_ And this fraction's like: "I ain't tryin' to hear that!"_

_ So he takes out a grenade and throws it at the fraction's head_

_And the grenade explodes and both fractions are dead!_

_So what have you all learned up in this lesson?_ _ …THAT'S A TRICK QUESTION!_

Still grinning, Arlen clicked off the karaoke machine, and the audience was left in stunned silence.

**(Confession Cam: He's greater or less than nothing, but only 5/3 of the time)**

** Chelsea**—"Who gave Arlen access to a whiteboard?"

**Zane**—"So, in case you didn't already know…nothing he said was even remotely correct…"

**Riley**—_(Grins.) _"I kinda liked it!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay!" Chris clapped, slowly, as he walked onto the stage. "That was…interesting! Arlen, Chef and I ended up giving you an eight. It was entertaining, and you aren't a bad rapper."

"Only an eight?" Arlen complained. "Are you crazy?"

"Is that a trick question?" Lacey called out from the audience.

"Alright, alright…" Arlen grumbled, and retreated off the stage. The villains were still pretty pleased with the score, and Arlen was met with fist-bumps and pats-on-the-back galore, once he got up in the stands.

"Next!" Chris announced. "We have…Rosetta!" Rosetta walked up on the stage and waved mildly at the audience, before she walked to her keyboard and experimentally hit a few keys. The sound was fine; she exhaled and closed her eyes.

**(Confession Cam: Did nobody seriously notice the bear?) **

**Rosetta**—"I'm tired of this, okay? I really am. I don't want to be the sulky, depressed teammate, and I love playing the keyboard, so I just want to just…" _(She sighs.) _"Just let it all go, and be done with it. And that's what I plan to do." _(Sarcastically, she does jazz hands.) _"In _song_."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Rosetta: "Your Ex-Lover Is Dead" by Stars)**

The karaoke machine (which, apparently, could do things normal karaoke machines can't, but whatever) played the strings in the background while Rosetta played the part of the piano on her keyboard.

_ God that was strange to see you again  
Introduced by a friend of a friend  
Smiled and said 'yes I think we've met before'  
In that instant it started to pour,  
_

_ Captured a taxi despite all the rain  
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain  
And all of the time you thought I was sad  
I was trying to remember your name..._

_This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin  
Tried to reach deep but you couldn't get in  
Now you're outside me  
You see all the beauty  
Repent all your sin_

_It's nothing but time and a face that you lose  
I chose to feel it and you couldn't choose  
I'll write you a postcard  
I'll send you the news  
From a house down the road from real love..._

_Live through this, and you won't look back...  
Live through this, and you won't look back...  
Live through this, and you won't look back..._

_There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave  
You were what I wanted  
I gave what I gave  
I'm not sorry I met you  
I'm not sorry it's over  
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save_

_I'm not sorry there's nothing to save..._

The song ended, and Rosetta stood around, awkwardly waiting for her score to come.

Riley looked over to her side when she heard some sniffling. "Are you _crying_?" She asked.

"No!" Seth wailed, dabbing his eyes with a handkerchief.

"Alright!" Chris mused, as he walked on stage. "Very nice, Rosetta, you ended up scoring a seven. I suppose you're dedicating that to a certain flame-headed ex-flame, eh?" He chuckled and elbowed her in the ribs.

Rosetta looked a bit off-set at first, but after a moment, she smiled. "I suppose I did."

**(Confession Cam: Well, life's a one-way street…then again…) **

**Rosetta**—"I feel…" _(She smiles.) _"Better."

**Zane**—"Well, if Rosetta's not a pessimist anymore, I guess I've got to pick up the slack." _(Chuckles.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Next," Chris announced, "we have Jack and Lola, who're doing a duet, as far as we know! Let's give them a round of applause, preferably a sarcastic, slow-clap!" As the campers did just that, the queen bee and Jack (whose stereotype isn't quite so blaring, so) walked onto the stage.

**(Confession Cam: Is Jack the nonconformist? Wait, no, that's Lacey…we can't keep this straight)**

** Lola**—_(With a rather evil grin) _"You know what they say…the villain songs are always the most memorable. I plan to _exemplify_ that fact."

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hey, Chris," Jack questioned. "Can we get the villains to sit up here for this song? They won't be singing."

Chris shrugged. "Sure, whatever."

Lola and Jack waved the villains over to the stage, who, confusedly, made their way up. (Zane and Zarya had to be dragged.) Lola and Jack directed them to places to sit, and the villains did as they were told. To even further the spectators' confusion, Lola and Jack had Logan sit in the middle of all the villains. Jack ran over and hit a button on the karaoke machine, and the duet began.

**(Lola and Jack: "My Lullaby" from The Lion King 2, with modified lyrics!)**

_(Lola)_

_Sleep, my teammate, Logan_ (at this, Logan raised an eyebrow)_  
Let your dreams take wing  
One day when you're big and strong  
You will be a king_

"Awesome!" Logan exclaimed, but the others shushed him.

_I've been once eliminated  
Left alone with no defense  
When I think of what my team did  
I get a little tense_

_But I dream a dream so pretty  
So I don't feel so depressed  
'Cause it soothes my inner kitty  
And it helps me get some rest_

_ Seth's last words as he gets the boot  
And Riley's too, when she takes no loot  
To hear the heroes' hopeless sigh  
That's my lullaby_

_Now the past I've tried forgetting  
And my foes I could forgive  
Trouble is, I knows it's petty  
But I hate to let them live_

_(Jack)_

_So we've got ourselves a new team who'll chase their team up a tree!_

_ (Lola)_

_Oh the battle may be bloody…_

_(Jack) _

_But that kinda WORKS for me!_

_(Lola)_

_The villains scoring a clean sweep  
Making all those morons weep  
To hear each heroes' last goodbye  
That's my lullaby_

_ Isaac's gone... but Logan's still around  
And ain't he quite the lad  
He's a delinquent, a real tough one  
With a lust for being bad!_

Jack approached Logan, and leered at him with such convincing resentment that for a second Logan was worrying about something he did nearly five chapters ago.

_(Jack)_

_Sleep, ya little termite!  
Uh- I mean, precious little thing! One day when you're big and strong…_

_(Lola)_

_ You will be a king!_

_(Jack)_

_ Our safety from a solid win!  
The cheers, the jeers, the games begin!_ _The joy of vengeance…testify!_

_(Lola)_

_I can hear the cheering!_

_ (Jack, waving around a flag with mock enthusiasm)_

_ Logan. What a guy._

_ (Lola)_

_ Payback time is nearing  
And then our flag will fly  
Against a blood-red sky  
That's my lullaby!_

The villains who were sitting on the stage jumped up, cheering wildly for the two of them, while the heroes stared, wide-eyed, at the performance they had just watched.

**(Confession Cam: Was that, like, _half_ of a song parody…?) **

**Seth**—"Well that was…certainly something."

**Bren**—"Wow. Lola can belt it."

**Riley**—"I feel like I should be worried now." _(Raises an eyebrow, and smirks.) _"Too bad I'm not…"

**Rosetta**—"Wait, so they were singing that Logan was the team's sure-fire way to victory?" _(Stares at the camera for a moment, then bursts out laughing.)_

()()()()()()()()

Even Chris looked impressed as he walked out to talk to the two competitors. "Awesome job, dudes! Everybody loves a good villain song. You guys scored nine points for your team!" The villains cheered, and rushed off the stage, back into the bleachers. Chris chuckled and glanced at the heroes. "I'd hate to see who has to follow that up!"

And that someone? Glisa. She took the stage, violin in hand, and she grinned at the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, dis is da story of Billy la Bufanda."

**(Glisa: "Billy la Bufanda" by…I honestly have no idea. It's on YouTube.)**

_ Billy la Bufanda (Billy the Scarf)  
Fue a la farmacia (went to the pharmacy)  
Para comprar pastilles (to buy pills)  
Para dolor de muelas (for a tooth ache)_

_ Yo sé (I know)  
Billy la Bufanda es una bufanda (Billy the scarf is a scarf!)  
No tiene dientes (He doesn't have teeth!)  
No puede tomar nada (He can't take anything.)  
Es una bufanda (He's a scarf.)  
No fue a ninguna parte (He didn't go anywhere)_

_ Billy la Bufanda (Billy the towel)  
Fue al estadio (Went to the stadium)  
Para ver un partido (To see a game)  
De básquetbol (of basketball)_

_ Yo sé (I know)  
Billy la Bufanda es una bufanda (Billy the Scarf is a scarf!)  
No tiene ojos (He doesn't have eyes!)  
No puede ver nada (He can't see anything!)  
Es una bufanda (HE'S A SCARF.)  
No fue a ninguna parte (He didn't go anywhere…)_

_ Billy la Bufanda (Billy the Scarf)  
Fue al restaurante (went to the restaurant)  
Para comer espaguetis (to eat spaghetti)  
Su favorito (his favorite!)_

_ Yo sé (I know)  
Billy la Bufanda es una bufanda (Billy the Scarf is a scarf!)  
No tiene una boca (He doesn't have a mouth!)  
No puede comer nada (He can't eat anything!)  
Es una bufanda (He's a scarf.)  
No fue a ninguna parte (He…didn't go anywhere.)_

_ Billy la Bufanda (Billy the Scarf)  
fue a ver a las botas (went to see the boots)  
Las botas bonitas (the pretty)  
y muy deliciosas (and very delicious boots)_

_ Hola botas (Hello boots!)  
Son muy bonitas (You're very pretty!)  
Las quiero (I love you both!)_

And with that, Glisa bowed. "The end!" The spectators clapped with hesitation, since they had no idea what she just sang, except for Long, who shook his head as he thumbed through his Spanish-English translation book. Not that doing so made things any clearer. "What the heck…" Long muttered to himself.

Chris walked onto the stage. "Well that was just plain odd! But hey, for whatever reason, you reduced Chef to tears of joy. He really felt an emotional connection to Billy…la…boofah or whatever the heck that was. Anyways, ten points for the heroes!" The heroes had a delayed reaction due to shock. After the news sunk in they jumped up, roaring and cheering for Glisa. Chris continued to grin at the heroes with glee. "That means that the heroes and the villains are tied! Next up…Lacey, with her parody song!"

Lacey hopped up stage, and grabbed her bass guitar, before she put a microphone in a stand. She took one, short breath, then grinned and hit the button.

**(Lacey: "Wawanakwa", parody of Shakira's "Waka Waka". I HAD TO.)**

_ Here we've got two teams_

_ Hero and villain_

_ Giving them strife_

_ Endangering their life_

_ All for that million_

_ Twenty-four veterans_

_ Too long of a summer_

_ Psychopath host_

_ We're probably all toast_

_ Ain't that just a bummer?_

_ Lola, queen bee_

_ She's sneering_

_ And Laura, too_

_ Ain't cheering_

_ How'd we get stuck_

_ Here again?_

_ Think you're done_

_ But you'll find, then_

_ Your contract hasn't_

_ Died quite yet, bra_

_ Up here in Canada!_

_ Now we know, and now we say_

_ Wawanakwa? RUN AWAY!_

_ Zane and Zarya avoid the hurrah_

_ In crazy Canada!_

_ Listen to us now_

_ We'll tell you a story_

_ It might not be sane_

_ We're in crazy lane_

_ At least it can't bore me!_

_ We're still all waiting_

_ For celebration_

_ Like, if we survive_

_ Get out here alive_

_ For a __vacation_

_ And now we wait_

_ Till we know_

_ Who will be next_

_ Off the show_

_ If it's me, _

_ I shouldn't care_

_ But the money's _

_ Right over there!_

_ I should've have just gotten a job_

_ My dignity is robbed_

_ Now we know, and now we say_

_ Wawanakwa? RUN AWAY!_

_ We all hate and love the huzzah_

_ Up here in Canada!_

_ Now and know, and now we say_

_ Wawanakwa? RUN AWAY!_

_ We may be bad but we draw up awe_

_ Rockin' in Canada!_

Lacey bowed and the villains whooped.

"Hm…I don't appreciate the insults," Chris mused, annoyed, as he walked onto the stage, "but overall…good job. You scored a seven-and-a-half." Lacey narrowed her eyes, but knew protesting was futile. She shrugged and hopped off the stage.

"And after Lacey, it's time for a hero…" Chris mused. "How about we get…Jess up here?"

"Yes!" The prankster pumped a fist in the air, ran up stage, and grinned at the audience. "Who's ready to _rock_?"

**(Jess: "Crushcrushcrush" by Paramore) **

_I got a lot to say to you  
Yeah, I got a lot to say  
I noticed your eyes are always glued to me  
Keeping them here  
And it makes no sense at all_

_They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies  
They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies_

_Crush  
Crush  
Crush  
Crush, crush  
(Two, three, four!)_

_Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one-two of us, who's counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than this_

_If you want to play it like a game  
Well, come on, come on, let's play  
Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending  
Than have to forget you for one whole minute_

_They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies  
They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies_

_Crush  
Crush  
Crush  
Crush, crush  
(Two, three, four!)_

_Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one-two of us, who's counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than this now_

_Rock and roll, baby  
Don't you know that we're all alone now?  
I need something to sing about  
Rock and roll, hey  
Don't you know, baby, we're all alone now?  
I need something to sing about  
Rock and roll, hey  
Don't you know, baby, we're all alone now?  
Give me something to sing about_

_Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one-two of us, who's counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than  
No, oh_

_Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one-two of us, who's counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than  
More than this  
Ohoh ohoh ohoh  
Oooh..._

"YEAH JESS!" Aaron cheered, jumping up and down. "You rock! Yeah! Whoo!" Jess grinned at him and Aaron blushed when he saw that his whole team was staring at him. A moment passed, the heroes shrugged in almost-perfect sync, and they hopped up and cheered too.

**(Confession Cam: Subtlety is not our forte) **

**Jess**—_(Laughs.) _"Aaron's pretty sweet. That whole performance was fun to do, I'm liking this challenge!"

()()()()()()()()()

"Awesome song, Jess!" Chris congratulated her, as they bumped fists. "Buuut…"

Jess's eyes popped. "But?"

"Well, Chef isn't too fond of that crazy rock-and-roll things you kids listen to…his words, not mine. Jess, you scored a six."

**(Confession Cam: Hey, 60% is still a passing grade!)**

** Jess—**"I take that back. I hate this challenge."

()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes booed in protest, but the scoring was final.

"It's twenty-four and a half to twenty three!" Chris announced. "Villains are in the lead! Let's see how they keep that lead when…" Chris raised an eyebrow. "Wow, okay, didn't see this one coming. Zane and Zarya are performing together?"

**(Confession Cam: Are we working overtime, here? How many times are we gonna show up?)**

** Glisa—**"YES!"

**Lacey—**"_Wow_."

**Sienna—**"Interesting…"

**Logan—**"What? Oh, yeah…um…exciting, yeah. I'm gonna leave now."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane and Zarya both quietly moved to the stage. Zane stationed himself at the keyboard and Zarya, reluctantly, moved to the microphone.

**(Confession Cam: Come on! One sentence in-between?)**

** Zarya—**"Okay, I asked Zane to accompany me, _just because_ he can play piano, I needed a piano background, and he needed an act, okay?" _(Exhales, loudly.) _"Okay."

()()()()()()()()()()

**(Zane and Zarya: Scala & Kolacny Brothers' cover of Radiohead's "Creep")**

_ When you were here before  
Couldn't look you in the eye  
You're just like an angel  
Your skin makes me cry  
You float like a feather  
In a beautiful world  
And I wish I was special  
You're so very special_

_But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here_

_I don't care if it hurts  
I want to have control  
I want a perfect body  
I want a perfect soul  
I want you to notice  
When I'm not around  
You're so very special  
I wish I was special_

_But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here_

_She's running out again,  
She's running out  
She's run run run running out_

_Whatever makes you happy  
Whatever you want  
You're so very special  
I wish I was special_

_But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo,  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here  
I don't belong here_

The piano-accompanied song, sung with such quiet intensity, left the heroes and villains in stunned silence for a moment. Zane and Zarya nervously looked down for a moment, before loud applause burst from sixteen others on the stands.

Even Chris looked impressed when he walked out. "Wow, never thought you two would team up for something like this. Excellent work…and I'm sure the villains would agree! You guys scored ten points!"

The villains' cheers grew, and Zarya even smiled at Zane for a brief moment…unfortunately, Zane didn't see.

Chris laughed, evilly, as he turned towards the fearful heroes. "You guys are falling behind…shall we see what Seth can do to help you guys out?"

"Eh…" Seth looked nervous, but Riley gave him an encouraging smile and Seth walked out onto the stage.

"Okay, then…" he mused, grabbing the microphone. "Here goes." He messed with the karaoke machine for a moment until he found the song he was looking for, unfortunately, once he pressed play…no sound came out.

"What's going on?" Seth questioned the heroes.

Bren and Aaron, the ones to set up the machine, both shrugged, completely confused as well.

"Um…" Seth fiddled with the karaoke machine for a while longer but to no avail. "Guys…I think it's broken. Or I don't know. It's not working, though, that much is for sure…"

"Heh," Lola chuckled. "Now there's a stroke of luck. Especially considering we still have our karaoke machine."

"Couldn't we just let Seth use ours?" Jack questioned, but then shook his head. "Never mind, dumb question."

"I think Seth's gonna have to sing this one a cappella," Bren murmured to the others, nervously. Seth himself seemed to realize this, because he moved towards the end of the stage, and began to sing sans any background music at all.

**(Seth: "Your Guardian Angel" by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)**

_When I see your smile  
Tears roll down my face I can't replace  
And now that I'm strong I have figured out  
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul  
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.  
Seasons are changing  
And waves are crashing  
And stars are falling all for us  
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter  
I can show you I'll be the one_

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_Cause you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart  
Please don't throw that away  
Cause I'm here for you  
Please don't walk away and  
Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah_

_Use me as you will  
Pull my strings just for a thrill  
And I know I'll be okay  
Though my skies are turning gray_

_I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

Without the music, the heroes weren't sure whether or not Seth was finished so Seth cleared his throat and awkwardly announced: "So…that's it."

The heroes cheered, though, and Seth smiled, relieved that it didn't go as bad as he expected it to. Chris walked towards Seth and grinned.

"Not too bad for a dude with no accompaniment! You scored nine points!"

Seth sighed in relief and jumped off the stage to go back to his fellow heroes. Riley, who seemed very happy, gave Seth a quick hug, which colored the karate kid's cheeks bright red.

"Things are looking up for the heroes…" Chris mused. "Let's see how…" he paused, then grinned. "Wait a minute. You guys already had all your performers perform. And yet, with the heroes…both Damion and Riley still haven't gone."

The villains all froze, having not realized this.

"And we're performing together, just because a drum solo on its own isn't all that cool," Riley remarked. "So, uh, I guess as long as we get a three or above, we win…right?"

"Right," Chris chuckled.

Riley couldn't help but grin. "Alright, then. Shall we, Damion?" Damion nodded and grinned.

"We shall," he agreed.

**(Confession Cam: Who knows? Maybe they'll really, really suck!)**

** Damion—**"Riley certainly has an interesting taste of music. I like the song she picked out! I can certainly see why she likes it, too, with her being the gamer and all." _(He smiles.)_

**(Damion and Riley: "Stylo" by Gorillaz, the SNES remix)**

_Love, electricity, shock wave central  
Power on the motherboard, yes  
Push up, overload, legendary heavy glow  
Sunshine, thunder roll, keep this all together_

_Lantern burn, burn that easy  
And broadcast, so raw and neatly  
Thunder roll, sunshine, work it out_

_Overload, overload, overload  
Coming up to the  
Overload, overload, overload  
Coming up to the_

_Overload, overload, overload  
Coming up to the  
Overload, overload, overload  
Coming up to the_

_Oh stylo  
Go forth, blossom in your soul  
When you know your heart is light  
Electric is the love_

_When the mako flies  
Up from the bottom in your eyes  
Then I know the twilight skies  
Not so broken-hearted_

_Yes, this love is electric  
It'll be flowing on the streets  
Night after night  
Just to get through the week, sometimes it's hard  
Right now_

_Sing yourself out of depression, rise above  
I'll be searching if I know your heart  
Electric is the love_

_There's only one way  
(Overload, overload, overload)  
Let it pray a little while longer  
(Coming up to the overload, overload, overload)_

_It's got a way of passing  
(Coming up to the)  
Through man and woman in another world  
(Overload, overload, overload)_

_In another world, in the universe  
(Coming up to the overload)  
Oh  
(Overload, overload, coming up to the)_

_Right now  
Here's what we got to do_

_Yes, this love is electric  
(Overload, overload, overload, coming up to the)  
It'll be flowing onto the street  
(Overload, overload, overload, coming up to the)_

_Night after night  
(Overload, overload, overload, coming up to the)  
Just to get through the week  
(Overload, overload, overload)  
Sometimes it's hard  
(Coming up to the)_

_That's what I'm talking about_

_Love, electricity, shock wave central  
Pummel on the motherboard, yes  
Push up, overload, legendary heavy glow  
Sunshine, thunder roll, keep this all together_

_The lantern burn, burn that easy  
And broadcast, so raw and neatly  
Thunder roll, sunshine, work it out  
Right now_

And, thankfully, the two of them did _not _suck, so the heroes cheered wildly and cheered even louder when Chris announced that they had scored an eight.

"Ah, but wait—just—one—minute," Chris said, slowly. "The villains had four performances. The heroes had five. It only seems fair that the villains should be able to get one more."

"Yeah, but all there performers have…well…performed!" Aaron exclaimed. "So, we win!"

"And you said nobody could switch sides," Damion pointed out.

"I said a performer couldn't become a groupie," Chris chuckled. "I never said groupies couldn't become performers."

Logan suddenly had the urge to punch Chris in the face.

"What do you say, Logan?" Chris chuckled. "Want to give us one last performance for the villains?"

"No," Logan said bluntly.

Sienna raised an eyebrow. "Logan. Are you the flute player?"

Logan crossed his arms, even more stubborn that before. "_No_!"

Sienna inched towards Logan. "Stop being a baby and play the damn flute! We need a performance to win!" Logan shook his head. "I'll even sing with you," Sienna offered. Logan still shook his head. Sienna sighed, and leaned towards Logan, her eyelids fluttering. "Please? For me?"

Logan tried resisting for a second, but then groaned and conceded. "Fine, fine." He jumped off the stands and ran towards the stage, and Sienna followed to sing with him.

"Wait a second!" Jess objected. "They haven't practiced anything together, how do they know what they're doing! This doesn't make any sense!"

"Sweetie," Damion soothed her, patting her on the shoulder. "We have to get used to stuff like this."

"So…" Sienna looked towards Logan. "Uh, do you know how to play 'Bad Romance'?"

Logan rubbed the back of his head and answered, with reluctance: "…yes."

**(Sienna and Logan: "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga)**

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_I want your ugly  
I want your disease  
I want your everything  
As long as it's free  
I want your love  
Love-love-love  
I want your love_

_I want your drama  
The touch of your head  
I want you leather studded kiss in the scene  
I want your love  
love-love-love  
I want your love_

_You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
I want it bad  
Bad romance_

_I want your loving  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
I want your loving  
All your love is revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_I want your horror  
I want your design  
'Cause you're a criminal  
As long as your mine  
I want your love  
Love-love-love  
I want your love_

_I want your love  
Love-love-love  
I want your love_

_You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
I want it bad  
Bad romance_

_I want your loving  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
I want your loving  
All your love is revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

_Walk-walk fashion baby  
Work it  
Move that c-crazy  
Walk-walk fashion baby  
Work it  
Move that c-crazy  
Walk-walk fashion baby  
Work it  
I'm a free chick, baby_

_I want your love  
And I want your revenge  
I want your love  
I don't wanna be friends_

_J'veux ton amour  
Et j'veux ton revenge  
J'veux ton amour  
I don't wanna be friends_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_I want your loving  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
I want your loving  
All your love is revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!  
Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah!  
Rom-mah-rom-mum-mah!  
GaGa-oo-la-la!  
Want your bad romance_

Logan lowered his flute and Sienna waited in silence as Chris walked out to the stage for the villains' final score.

"Logan and Sienna…" Chris began, slowly. "With that ridiculously long song…you have scored…six points. Which puts you a half a point _ahead of the heroes_."

"NO!" The heroes shouted, in dismay, while the villains erupted in cheers. Logan and Sienna hugged each other, quickly, and Chris turned to the heroes with maniacal glee.

"You guys are on the chopping block tonight…again. Cast your votes and meet me at the campfire in an hour. Congratulations to the villains, all of you are safe! For now!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Logan walked back to the villains' cabin, grinning to himself in triumph.

"She so wants me," he chuckled, thinking of Sienna. And then, as an afterthought, "err…even after she saw me with the flute? Maybe she thinks guys with instruments are sexy…?"

He continued down his way, but the sound of faint singing made him turn his head.

_It's a brand new day_

_ And the sun is high…_

_ All the angels sing—_

_ Because you're GONNA DIE._

But when Logan turned his head, the singing ceased.

"What the…" he muttered to himself. "Whatever. Too much music in one day, sheesh…"

()()()()()()()()()

"Lacey, hey!" Jack caught up with the nonconformist, and grinned at her. "Your parody song was hilarious. It should've gotten a higher score."

"Thanks. You and Lola were pretty awesome, too. I never would've pegged you guys as _Lion King_ fans…"

"Yeah, well I'd never peg you as a Shakira fan, either."

"The song's called 'Waka Waka'!" Lacey objected. "Come on, I couldn't pass that up."

Jack smirked, but after a moment, raised an eyebrow. "Hey, you told me a while back that I shouldn't trust Logan. Why'd you say that?"

Lacey shrugged. "I know the type. He just doesn't seem like the type of guy you could rely on." She hopped up the stairs to the villainesses' cabin, and then wheeled around, grinning at Jack: "Then again, with a team full of _villains_…who _can_ you trust?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

Monique sat on a tree stump, filing her nails, as she thought of the advice she had given Logan just a few days earlier. She wanted him to take down Jack first, since he was too much of a threat. Then she'd get him to dispose of Seth, Riley, and Bren…if only the bad boy was a little more competent.

She sighed to herself. Guys were _sooooo_ unreliable.

If Logan didn't hurry up, she would have to start interfering, and then things would _not_ be pretty…

She looked up for a moment, and then smirked as she saw a figure in the distance.

"Well, would you look at that," she murmured. "Looks like I'm not the only cast-off to find their way back here, hm…?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

The nine heroes sat around the campfire, warily staring at the flames of the fire.

"Heroes!" Chris came into sight, carrying a platter of eight marshmallows. "You guys certainly put up a noble effort…but to no avail, I'm afraid. Time for my favorite part of the show! The first marshmallow goes to…Seth. Then…Rosetta. Damion. Riley. Glisa. Long. Now then…" Chris glanced at Bren, Aaron, and Jess. "Bren and Aaron…you didn't carry any of the load, and somehow you screwed up the set-up. Jess, you scored the lowest score of the performing heroes. The next marshmallow goes to…Aaron. And the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Jess."

The prankster caught her marshmallow with relief, and Bren sighed and lowered his head.

"Aw, dude, we'll miss you!" Seth exclaimed, before he and Riley both hugged him.

"Well…" Bren stood up, and smiled at the others. "It was a good run, eh? I guess I'll see you guys at the finale…" he paused for a moment. "Um, tell Lacey I'm sorry about last season, okay? I didn't mean to cause that much trouble. Well, maybe I did, but I'm sorry about it now."

With (most of) his dignity still intact, Bren walked down the Dock of Shame, got on the Boat of Losers, and waved to the others as he was driven away.

"So that's it for now!" Chris announced, looking at the eight heroes. "You guys have had quite a night. So…go to bed? Heck, I don't care; I'm not your mom…"

"You could've fooled me," Jess commented. Chris just rolled his eyes.

()()()()()()()()()()()

** (So, who voted for whom?)**

** Seth—**Jess

**Riley—**Jess

**Bren—**Aaron

**Long—**Aaron

**Rosetta—**Bren

**Damion—**Bren

**Glisa—**Bren

**Jess—**Bren

**Aaron—**Bren

()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: Bren's final words. Is it horrible we forgot to show Kit-Kat's?)**

** Bren—**"I just want to leave her with some pride intact, and I'm pretty sure I accomplished that. This was a pretty good season, I think. Seth and Riley, you guys are pretty darn awesome; see you at the finale or when you get eliminated. But hey, you guys could make it to the final two, who knows?" _(He grins.) _ "Yeah, but I'm not gonna be sneaking back onto the island or doing anything crazy for vengeance. I can't imagine who'd be stupid enough to try that…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(A.N.) Eliminated list: **Laura, Demi, Isaac, Riley F, Mo, Kit-Kat, Bren

Whoo! It's been a while, hasn't it? This is a really long chapter, but pretty much just thanks to the lyrics. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed it.

**1: **Lacey's referring to the Katy Perry Sesame Street incident. It's probably…not very current anymore…but I swear, things are current when I'm writing about them!

I chose everybody's song for a reason, but I'll explain some of them.

**Arlen: **It comes from a video on YouTube called "Fraction Jackson" and I'm not gonna say that it's "not as stupid as it sounds" because it is. It really is.

**Glisa: **Ditto.

**Rosetta: **Not that odd, I guess, but it's a pretty song, I'd recommend checking it out if you haven't heard it before.

**Lola and Jack: **I…like villain songs.

**Lacey: **As reiterated in the chapter, 'Waka Waka' and 'Wawanakwa'? I couldn't resist. I worked very hard on the parody so if you don't like it…well, don't tell me.

**Damion and Riley: **The remix is AWESOME.

So, yeah! That's it! Things are pretty good for me, I saw Ludo in concert and it was pretty much the greatest thing ever.

By the way, I want to do a Halloween challenge, but I'm worried I wouldn't get it out by Halloween…what do you guys think?

Thank you for reading, and please review, if you get the chance! I hope this chapter wasn't too rushed, I feel like it was…


	12. The Lost Boys and Girls

**(A.N.) **Enjoy the update! That is…all I've got to say!

This chapter is brought to you by: a complete neglect of what time/season this is taking place. I honestly don't know anymore. I'd say summer, but nobody acknowledges that this is the Halloween special and it's taking place in summer so _I give up_.

And if you find any plot holes in this chapter, it's due to the mystical powers of the Halloween holiday. _Ooooooohhhh_.

Oh, and title is a reference! To a fairly old movie!

()()()()()()()()()()

As the camera opened up to Chris standing on the Dock of Shame, there were a few noticeable differences. Instead of daylight, it was pitch black outside, and the Dock of Shame was lit by eerie-looking torches that had skeleton heads on top of them. Chris was wearing a long, black cloak, fake fangs, a monocle, and a little top hat.

"Good evening…" Chris chuckled in a god-awful Transylvanian accent. "Last time, on TDI: Heroes Versus Villains…

"The campers split up into performers and groupies for a music-themed challenge! There was Paramore, an emotional story of a scarf, a kinda-creepy song from Lola and Jack, an a capella performance from Seth, and we found out that Arlen knows nothing about fractions at all!

"Logan and Sienna teamed up to save the day with a last performance for the villains, putting them half-a-point ahead of the heroes. The heroes lost for the _third time in a row_. Ha. Losers. They ended up sending Bren home, and so ends the Bren-Riley-Seth alliance.

"So, will the heroes lose _again_? Why is Logan hearing voices? And what _horrors_ will await the campers, on the most…" Chris's monolog was cut off when one of the torches fell over a few feet away, setting the dock on fire. "Oh crap."

()()()()()()()()()()

Glisa walked out to the heroines' front porch, grinning widely to herself and putting her hands on her hips.

"It is a _bella_ day!" She proclaimed. "The sun is shining; the sky is pure _azul_…it's just _perfecto_."

"To be honest, this weather is kind of out of place," Riley commented, as she walked out of the cabin, "considering today's episode is the Halloween special."

Instantly, the blue sky was overcome with dark, gloomy gray clouds that cast a shadow over the whole campground. In the distance, a thunderclap could be heard.

"Ay…" Glisa sighed.

()()()()()()()()

"Guys, I think Chef forgot to dust again…" Lacey remarked, facetiously, as she ducked to avoid some cobwebs that were strung around the whole mess hall. All of the campers were pretty impressed with the job that they had done with decorating for Halloween. There were cardboard cutouts of monsters, pumpkins, cobwebs (as Lacey had pointed out), eerie candles on the tables, and even rats and spiders. Unfortunately, those last two weren't decorations.

"Are Chris and Chef even here?" Lola asked, as she entered the room. "The rest of the camp is like, freakishly silent."

"Oh _no_," Zane muttered, mostly to himself, as he kept his eyes glued to the book he was reading. "_Silence_. Wouldn't want that, now, would we…"

"It's probably just one of those challenges," Seth suggested, "where Chris and Chef don't show up until the actual beginning of the challenge. Like, they're too busy setting up or preparing stuff for the challenge elsewhere."

"Chris is helping set up?" Riley questioned, skeptically.

"Good point." Seth nodded. "_Chef_ is setting up, and Chris is…I don't know…at a spa appointment somewhere?"

"But since Chef's not here, what should we do for breakfast, guys?" Aaron asked the other heroes. "I am _hungry_. Darn it, we don't have Kit-Kat to magically whip up pastries for us anymore!"

"Which means no donuts," Jess groaned.

Long sighed as well, although it was not so much for the pastries themselves as the person who made them.

"Well, let's get some food!" Riley urged the others. "C'mon, we have options."

"Like what?" asked Glisa.

"Like…hijack a boat, go to Hummingbird Hollow…or we could—" Riley's next suggestion was cut off by the sound of an explosion. The door to the kitchen swung open, and Rosetta stood in its wake, ash-covered, wide-eyed, with singed hair.

"Raid…Chef's…fridge…" Riley finished, as she gave Rosetta a disturbed stare. Meanwhile, the tough girl staggered forward a few feet and coughed.

"I think the booby traps are all gone in there," she said, before proceeding to pass out on the floor.

"Wasn't that the sort of thing _I_ was supposed to do?" Arlen asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah, but, dis is good!" Glisa whispered to Riley. "She is back to her normal self."

"This isn't exactly normal behavior," Jess, who was close to the other two heroines, deadpanned.

"Well, it's normal for her," Riley chuckled, with a grin. "I think the post-breakup depression is over. So, at least we've got her back in her right mind."

Jess laughed. "That makes one of us."

A few moments passed by.

"We should probably move her off of da floor…" Glisa commented.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Following a stolen breakfast, the campers headed out of the mess hall to kill time before the challenge that day. Riley, Glisa, and Jess went out to a clearing in the woods to toss around a Frisbee for a while.

"Hey, so even if Chef is preparing for the challenge, how does he stay so hidden?" Jess asked the other two heroines.

"I heard Lacey say something about a secret base Chef has," Riley replied, as she caught the Frisbee and tossed it to Glisa. "It's not quite as interesting as it sounds, though. To be honest, it's pretty much a basement. With…an entrance to the sewer."

"Still sounds better than the rest of the camp," Jess mused, with a shrug.

"Ah, so, where does Chris live?" Glisa questioned. "I am sure he must not sleep _por aquí_."

"Nah, Pretty-Boy lives in a fancy-schmancy beach house somewhere around here," Jess replied.

"I think it's even on a different island," Riley added, chuckling. "Maybe he thinks he needs to put as much distance between us and him as he can."

Glisa tilted her head. "Why is dat?"

Riley grinned, awkwardly. "He probably thinks one of us is gonna try and kill him in his sleep."

"Personally, I'd just want to leave him on top of the mess hall roof," Jess commented. "Or floating in the middle of the lake on a rubber duckie. Or just take all of his hair products. Or..." Jess chuckled as she thought of the possibilites.

"Enjoying yourself?" Riley questioned her, giggling.

"Immensely," Jess agreed, nodding. "Imaging payback against Chris is one of my favorite hobbies."

"On a _claro_ note," Glisa said, changing the subject a tad, "Riley, what did you think when Seth went a little _loco_ and called you smart and pretty and all those wonderful things? I think it was very sweet."

"Ah..." Riley's face became plauged with redness. "He was a bit out of it, so I don't think I can take what he said too seriously."

"Buuut..." Glisa continued, grinning mischievously now. "You liked it, didn't you? And da song...he was totally staring at you da whole time!"

"He was not!" Riley insisted, shaking her head, but still blushing. "And all that stuff he said was just the product of some serious mental damage." She shrugged.

"You know what dey say..." Glisa reprimended her, wistfully. "The clearest of truths come from the least clear of minds."

Jess gave her a speculative look. "Who, exactly, says that?"

Glisa shrugged, innocently. "I do!"

()()()()()()()()()()

Long climbed up the ladder on the side of the mess hall, a poetry book in hand. When he reached the top, he saw that someone was already up there.

"Oh, sorry," Long apologized, to Zane. Zane looked up, surprised. "I didn't realize this was already somebody's hiding spot…" he continued, before awkwardly retreating to the ladder.

Zane sighed. "You can stay if you want to. I mean, I don't care."

Long shrugged and moved towards the other end of the roof, leaning against the chimney.

"What are you reading?" Long asked Zane, after a few moments of silence.

"_The Alchemist_ by Paulo Coelho," Zane replied, quietly. "Rereading it, actually. It's one of my favorites…and yourself?"

"A little Henry Lawson," Long responded. Zane nodded, absentmindedly, and the two continued their reading.

"I'm sorry about Kit-Kat," Zane said suddenly.

Long raised an eyebrow.

"Are you actually being nice to me?" he asked.

Zane scowled, burying his face in his book. "No. I'm simply offering my condolences."

"You're making it sound like she _died_…"

"Just take my commiseration and shut up…" Zane muttered.

Long hid his smile behind his book.

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, ladies," Lola announced, as she strode into the villainesses' room. "We have got to be prepared for this next challenge. I want to keep our streak, got it? Don't screw this one up."

"You mean…" Lacey gasped, mockingly. "You want us to _win_?"

"Sounds pretty crazy to me…" Zarya murmured, from her top bunk bed.

"She has a point," Sienna spoke up, her hands on her hips. "If we keep picking off the heroes, they'll have less and less of a chance of winning the future challenges. So, we can so not slack off now. I mean, seriously, it's not like it's hard to guess what today's challenge will be."

"Heck yes," Chelsea chuckled, grinning wildly. "This is gonna be my kind of night. Slasher movies, house of horrors, whatever they're throwing at us—I am _ready_."

"It's not gonna be easy," Sienna warned them. "We've got our tough players, but so do they. The hero _guys_ aren't that much of a threat—"

"Ten bucks says Aaron and Seth are gone in the first ten seconds," Lola piped up.

"But," Sienna continued. "They do have Jess, Rosetta…Long is pretty dangerous too, I suppose." She smiled, evilly. "Hm, I've got an idea…we just need to find the things that scare the bejeezus out of the heroes…and we're set."

"Bejeezus?" Lacey echoed, lightly.

Sienna shrugged. "I don't like my censorship voice actress. Might as well do the censoring myself."

"So what are you proposing, exactly?" Chelsea asked, trying to get her to the point.

"I'm saying," Sienna explained, "that this challenge is gonna be based around fear. It's a Halloween challenge, after all. So, if Chris and Chef are throwing out things to scare all of us by putting us in a haunted mansion or something, we should do all we can to scare the heroes ourselves, as well. Still, that plan might not work, if this is a fear factor challenge again."

"I don't see why it would be," Lacey replied. "Most of us—heck, probably all of us—performed that challenge in our last challenge, so there's a good chunk of contestants who have already faced all their fears."

"So, you're not scared of weddings anymore?" Sienna asked, with a mischievous look.

Lacey scowled. "Of course not."

Sienna began humming the wedding march under her breath, prompting Lacey to plug her ears.

"Shut up!" the nonconformist growled.

"So what sort of things would the heroes be afraid of?" Lola asked. "Do you guys remember from your last seasons?"

"Ah…" Lacey fell back into her bed. "Bren and Kit-Kat are gone…as for Glisa…all she's really afraid of are sheep dogs. She didn't face that fear."

"I know that Seth is afraid of vampires," Lola told the girls, her arms crossed. "And Riley…Riley…" Lola groaned, impatiently. "Oh, how should I know, I don't waste my time on that geeky little—"

"She's afraid of spiders," Zarya interrupted Lola.

Lola raised an eyebrow. "Hm?"

"Riley," Zarya elaborated, "is afraid of spiders. She was cringing away from them in breakfast."

"Oh." Lola blinked. "All right, then."

"Hm." Zarya went back to her book.

"Y'know, I can take Jess…" Chelsea offered, smirking at the others. "I'm pretty sure I could give her a good scare."

"I'm all for that," Lola said, nodding at Chelsea. "Go for it."

"And, now that I think of it," Chelsea added, chuckling, "if Aaron thinks Jess is in trouble he'll no doubt try to save her in an incredibly over-the-top way, so that covers _him_ as well."

"Should we get the guys in on this plan?" Lola asked.

"Oh, please," Sienna scoffed. "Those idiots? No, they'd just screw it up. We need this to be a girl thing."

"Yeah," Chelsea agreed. "The guys aren't particularly scary. Well, I'm scared that they'll reproduce someday, but that's different."

"Besides," Lacey added, "the less people who know about…whatever we're doing…the better. We wouldn't want anybody to give it away." Lacey cleared her throat. "So, that still leaves Long, Rosetta, and Damion…"

"I'm mostly concerned with how we'd _find_ Long," Chelsea laughed.

"Nobody here was in any of their seasons," Lola realized. "Well…they can't be too hard to scare. If it's a haunted mansion challenge, or pretty much any who-can-last-longest challenge, we'll pull out all the stops to get them out of there."

"Awesome," Chelsea remarked, with a pleased look on her face. "So, we're set…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Yo, Seth!"

Seth turned around as Rosetta jogged to catch up with the karate kid.

"Hey," she greeted him. "Listen, I wanted to talk to you…"

"Sure thing." Seth smiled.

"I wanted to apologize," Rosetta continued, "for freaking out on you at Hummingbird Hollow. It was totally uncalled for. You were right to point out what Riley did, and I'm glad you did, I was just feeling…" she shrugged, awkwardly. "Yeah…so, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and that's…about…it." She held out her hand for Seth to shake. "So, awkward acquaintances?"

Seth laughed and shook her hand. "Awkward acquaintances," he agreed.

**(Confession Cam: A.A. for short)**

** Seth—**"Yes, I did it! Well, I didn't really do anything, but still, I'm really glad both of us stuck around to reconcile. Now all that's left on my to-do list is to get Riley to notice me…and to win this challenge…and quite possibly surf on the back of a shark, because that would be awesome."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Logan whistled to himself as he walked towards his cabin with his hands in his pockets. But as he approached the steps the sound of singing made him stop in shock.

_And injustice deliciously squared…_

_ Be prepared…!_

"Seriously?" Logan growled, wheeling around. "Again? The musical challenge was _last chapter_, dude. Or…" he looked around. "Dudette. And jeez, enough we had enough _Lion King_ with Jack and Lola." Still muttering to himself, he hopped up the rest of the steps and went inside the villains

"Hey, Logan," Jack greeted him, lazily. "What's up?"

"Nothing much…" Logan replied, although he definitely sounded uncertain. "Hey…have you guys ever felt like, someone was coming back to, ah, haunt you…?"

"No…" Jack said, giving Logan an odd look. "Then again, I'm sane. Why do you ask?"

"Ah, y'know…'cause of the Halloween spirit and stuff," Logan excused himself lamely.

Jack still gave Logan a confused look, but just shrugged and put on his iPod earphones. "Alright then...if you're gonna go crazy, I'll make sure to look out for you behind the shower curtains…"

**(Confession Cam—BOO! Did we scare ya?) **

** Logan—**"This is so friggin' stupid. Me and my musical schizophrenia. I must be going crazy…"

()()()()()()()()()

Day changed to night, and soon enough Camp Wawanakwa was pitch black. A full moon was out (because it wouldn't be Halloween without one) and the campers could hear a wolf (or perhaps Chef?) howling in the distance.

"Aw dude, here it comes," Arlen chuckled, as he and Logan began walking towards the mess hall. "Pitch black night, everyone's getting together for dinner…the challenge is gonna happen any second!"

"And you know what a scary challenge means for us, right?" Logan questioned, elbowing Arlen with a smirk.

"It means that…um…we'll be scared?" Arlen guessed.

Logan rolled his eyes. "No, dude, it means the _chicks_ will be scared! And when they get scared, they'll go to us for protection."

"I'll remember that," Sienna said breezily, as she brushed past the boys, "when you two are crying in a corner."

The boys watched her as she gained distance ahead of them.

"She digs me," Logan told Arlen, confidently.

When the two villains finally reached the mess hall, they were confused to find that the other fifteen campers were all outside, huddled in front of the front doors.

"What's going on?" Arlen wondered aloud.

"We're locked out," Lacey explained, in aggravation. "I don't think anyone's in there anyways, though. The lights are all off."

"Jack tried to pick the lock," Damion added. "But that didn't work. Then we tried to find something to smash open this lock, but nothing was big enough. Then we tried to send Aaron up and into the chimney, and now he's stuck."

Logan and Arlen looked up; Aaron waved at them from the rooftop.

"Ho, ho, ho!" He exclaimed.

"So now what?" Riley asked.

"Well, the challenge must be starting soon," Rosetta pointed out. "I guess we just sit around and wait for directions…"

**(Confession Cam: And **_**then**_**?)**

** Damion—**"So, we waited."

**Lola—**"And waited."

**Zarya—**_(Sighs.) _"And waited."

**Aaron—**"And then they pulled me out of the chimney!"

**Zane—**"And then we _waited some more_."

()()()()()()()()()()

After waiting around for an hour, the campers were close to either A) dying of boredom, B) falling asleep, or C) throwing Aaron through the mess hall window to get in, before they finally received the sign they were so desperately waiting for. From down the path, they could see a little light…and it was getting closer to them.

"What _is_ that thing?" Riley asked.

"It's…" Seth tilted his head, and squinted. "I think it's a tractor. And there's a big wagon being dragged behind it. Guys…" Seth blinked a few times. "I believe we're going on a hayride."

The campers groaned.

"Quit yer whinin'!" barked Chef, as the tractor _put-put-putted_ its way closer to the campers. "And get your butt on some hay!"

The campers did as they were told, and climbed onto the wagon, getting themselves situated in the hay. Once they were ready, Chef put the pedal to the medal, and they were rocking at a 20 mph pace.

"So, Chef," Sienna asked, "…what exactly are we doing?"

Chef chuckled. "You'll find out…"

The tractor started to approach the opening to the woods, then, and the campers exchanged glances as they submerged into the creepy forest.

Lacey gave Jack an amused look as the latter held himself together, shivering.

"Scared?" she asked him, grinning.

"Nah, just cold," Jack replied, grimacing.

"Somebody's walkin' over your grave, boy…" Chef said, grimly.

Jack gave him a speculative look. "That, or the wind chill, dude…" Jack continued rubbing his bare arms, and Lacey rolled her eyes.

"Dude, you can just take my—" Lacey began, as she started shrugging off her jacket, but she stopped as soon as she saw that Lola had moved closer to Jack, an arm around his waist. Jack looked surprised, but smiled.

From the other side of the hayride, Sienna bit her lip and gave her friend a sympathetic look.

**(Confession Cam: Broken hearts on…Halloween?)**

** Lacey—**_(Awkward laugh.) _"I'm not even a contender in this race, am I?"

**Sienna—**"Yeah, they haven't, like, hooked up yet or anything—but they're both definitely interested in each other. Oh…how do I know? Hel_lo_? Do you _know_ who I am?"

**Glisa—**_(Is wearing a 'Team Lacey' shirt.) _"_NO_! Well, we always have fanfiction…"

**Lola—**"Oh, come on, can you blame me? He's pretty hot. And he's actually…kind of…nice?" _(Shivers.) _"Still not used to that part."

**Jack—**_(Laughs.) _"Man, Lola's so…hot and cold, y'know? She drives me crazy. In a good way, though, it keeps things interesting." _(He looks confused.) _"By the way, what's up with this 'Team Lacey' shirt that Glisa's wearing?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The tractor traveled on for a while, when all of a sudden, Chef's front light turned off. The campers weren't too terribly alarmed, that is, until they heard someone scream. There was the sound of rustling, and then the light turned back on.

"Where's Chef?" Damion exclaimed. The front seat of the tractor was empty. The tractor slowly came to a stop.

"He's been taken by the mole people!" Aaron cried.

"Dudes, this is just part of the challenge!" Rosetta groaned, and then, giving Aaron a look: "…mole people?" Aaron shrugged.

"In any case, we should probably keep driving this thing," Rosetta continued. She climbed up to the front. "It's off. Just a sec…" she twisted the key. The engine sputtered but stayed dead. Rosetta slapped her forehead. "Oh right, right. Because the only bloody time the engine will stop working is when we're in the middle of the bloody freakin' forest!"

The campers froze then, when they could hear insane laughter coming from many different parts of the forest.

"Maybe we should get out of here," Jess suggested. "Like…now."

"Or maybe we should stay here instead of going towards that _loco_ laughter!" Glisa exclaimed, frantically. The campers all looked at each other, unsure what to do. For a while it was silent, but they all jumped when there was a sudden rumbling.

"It's just the engine!" Rosetta told them, from up ahead. "It's working now. Let's get this show on the road. If there was a road. Um, let's just keep going…" she kept driving the tractor forwards, but some of the campers were still a little spooked.

"What are we supposed to be doing now?" Damion asked. "Chef's gone, and he was the only one who knew what we were doing, so…"

"Well, Chef's disappearance is obviously part of the challenge," Lola pointed out. "We'll figure this out soon enough—ah!" Lola grimaced and hugged Jack tighter when more screams came from the forest. Lacey just leaned back and stared at the sky.

"Where am I going, exactly?" Rosetta questioned the others.

"How about you follow the giant flashing neon sign up ahead?" Riley suggested, pointing ahead. Sure enough, there was a huge arrow that pointed to another path that led deeper into the forest.

"Ugh, it feels like we're just going into more and more trouble," Sienna groaned. "But, the sooner we follow do whatever Chris wants us to do, the sooner we can get this stupid challenge over with." Rosetta drove the tractor down the path Chris was leading them to, and soon enough, the campers were approaching a large haunted mansion that was looming in the distance.

As soon as the tractor was stopped, they climbed off of the hayride and walked up towards the door.

"Um, should we knock?" Chelsea asked, awkwardly.

The door blew open, making the campers jump.

"Well, shall we?" Lacey asked, grinning, as he put her arms around her fellow villainesses and led them inside.

"Wait! We're supposed to protect you and stuff!" Arlen exclaimed, before running in as well. The other shrugged and dashed in soon.

Inside, the room was dimly lit, but the campers could see that there were two rickety staircases on both sides of the room that led to the upper floor. A swinging chandelier was above their heads, and there were many old-fashioned portraits on the walls…all of them of Chris.

"Seriously, how do they get these things up in like, one day?" Jess groaned, slapping her forehead.

"At least a whole landmark didn't appear out of thin air this time," Riley laughed. "Considering they did _that_, this mansion should almost seem like a bad effort."

"_Whoooo daaaaares insult my totally awesome mansiooooon?" _wailed a ghostly voice.

"Um…Lola did it," Riley lied.

"Hey!" Lola objected.

"_How long can you last in this nightmare…mare…mare?" _the voice asked, as its volume began to fade.

"Well, if I had to guess, I'd say about—" Aaron started, but he yelped when the entrance door slammed shut, and a skeleton-like figure began chasing after the campers, screaming its head off all the while. The campers scattered, _also_ screaming their heads off. They separated into all different directions, either alone or in small groups.

_"Hey Chef?" _the "mysterious" voice asked, offhandedly. _"Do we have any more of that Tantrum energy drink? It's freaking awesome!"_

_ "Dude," _Chef sighed. _"Mic."_

_ "Oh, right." _The mic clicked off.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Seth, Aaron, and Riley gasped as they finally came to a stop in one of the rooms.

"Think we lost that thing?" Seth questioned through heavy breaths.

"Looks like it," Riley agreed. Slowly, she regained her composure, and stood up straight. "That must've just been an intern in an above-par costume, but it scared the heck outta me!"

"_Was_ it an intern, Riley?" Aaron asked, mysteriously. Riley rolled her eyes and smirked, slapping Aaron on the shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm sure it was Jack Skellington, wanting to hang out for a while," she said. "Anyways, I guess we're just supposed to stay in here as long as we can, right? I mean, that must've been what Chris meant when he said," Riley mimicked his voice, then: "_How long can you stay in the nightmare…mare…mare…mare_?"

Seth chuckled, half-heartedly. "Dudes, this whole show is a nightmare. But hey, do you guys wanna explore a bit, then? We could hide out here, too, if you guys think that's a safer bet." Seth turned around then to look at the door that led out of the room, but he froze when he saw that they had some friends in the room as well.

"B-b-b-b-b…" Seth stammered, pointing to (yet another) chandelier that was dangling from the ceiling. Hanging from said ceiling were three small bats.

"Oh crap," Riley groaned. "Of all the rooms to end up in…look, Seth, if we just walk underneath them, nice and calm, I'm sure they won't wake up or anything. Okay?"

"I don't know about that," Aaron piped up. "Since it's nighttime, they're probably gonna wake up soon anyways!"

Riley slapped him on the shoulder, harder this time. "_Dude_!" She sighed, and paced around the room before noticing that there was an open window on one side of the room. "Okay, so what if I scare the bats into flying outside of the window?"

"No way, Riley!" Seth objected. "They'll…they'll…they'll bite you and then you'll turn into a vampire and then we'll all _die_!"

"Well, I promise I'll be a nice vampire," Riley said, smirking. "Strictly vegetarian. I'll sparkle in the sunlight and drink deer blood and all that jazz. Okay, so, I guess I should find something to scare them off…"

Aaron held out _The Exorcist_.

"Um, no, not quite," Riley said, frowning. "More so something to shake at them…"

Aaron handed her some maracas.

"Arriba," Riley said, sarcastically, as she threw them over her shoulder. "No. Something longer, something more like…dang it, if only I knew the right word…"

Aaron handed her a thesaurus.

"Oh, ha, ha. Look, a stick would work. Do you have a stick?"

"No," replied Aaron. He rummaged through his pockets. "But I have a watch that shoots mini harpoons…"

"Well, we don't have any use for bad running gags," Riley complained. "And how did we get stuck in a room that has nothing besides a flippin' _chandelier_!" Aggravated, Riley stomped her foot down and the sound resonated throughout the room. The bats squeaked and started flying around the room.

"Crap!" Riley shouted, covering her head with her hands. Seth, too, was wide-eyed and from the looks of it, he was about to go on a frantic fear-fueled freak-out.

"Quick, Riley!" Aaron exclaimed, innocently edging towards her. "Keep Seth distracted!" And with an innocent little push, Aaron sent Riley falling towards Seth. The two's lips met. Their cheeks turned red, their eyes widened, and they pulled away, Seth exploding into a flurry of apologies.

"Oh, wait, I've got it…" Aaron mused, ignoring the deathly glare Seth was sending him. He unzipped his jacket and began flapping it in front of him, towards the bats, leading them outside of the window. As soon as they were herded out, Aaron grinned and turned towards the other two.

"And that's _how_ we _do_ it—_aaaah_!" He yelped as a furious Seth stomped towards Aaron, a murderous glare in the usually peaceful one's eyes.

"Uh, before you decide to throw him out the window," Riley piped up. "Remember that if he exits the mansion, I'm pretty sure that means he's out and that's a man down for our team…"

Seth sighed, but relaxed.

"I think that they're just gonna send people after us, until they find us all…" Riley continued. "So, we should probably keep moving." She coughed, awkwardly. "I'll be outside."

As soon as she had closed the door behind her, Seth gave Aaron a hopeless look.

"Why'd you do that?" the karate kid exclaimed.

"Because!" Aaron answered. There was a long, long pause, as Aaron frantically came up with an excuse in his head. Eventually, he said to Seth in confidence: "She knows that that's not your fault…it's mine. And now that the first kiss is over…" Aaron grinned, mischievously. "Now, now she's _interested_. And she's interested without thinking you're some sort of womanizing jerk!"

"So…" Seth blinked a few times. "You actually had a _plan_ when you did that?"

"Yup!" Aaron lied.

"Well, okay then…" Seth mused. "Erm…um…thanks?" Aaron nodded, and grinned. "Let's keep going, I guess." The two guys turned around to walk to the door, but the sound of a scream, _Riley's_ scream, had them sprinting towards it. When they opened the door, lying in front of the door was one fingerless glove.

"Should you or should I?" Aaron asked quickly.

"Me, definitely," Seth whimpered.

"Go for it," Aaron said.

Seth dropped down to his knees. "_**NOOOOO**_!" he wailed.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh…son of a…urgh…too tired to swear…" Jess gasped, as she slammed the door behind him. She quickly grabbed a chair and jammed it underneath the doorknob, as the psychopath who had been chasing her pounded against the door. Even though she had lost the skeleton that the campers had encountered first and foremost, she had run into a chainsaw-wielding psycho just around the next corner. Jess immediately started searching the room for something to help her.

"Dang it…" she muttered to herself. "There has to be some stupid secret passage or something." She began yanking books out of a bookcase that was against the opposite wall. "One of these has to open up a hole in the wall or something, right? Isn't that a rule of haunted mansions? Come on…"

The guttural voice of the psycho chuckled from behind the door.

"I can see you in there, Ms. Skidmore…_I know what you're up to_…!"

Jess gritted her teeth but paused in her frantic book-throwing.

_Wait a minute…_she thought to herself. _I know that voice! _Contemplating the situation, she leaned her back against the bookcase…which ended up making the whole wall turn around so that Jess stumbled into a whole new room.

"Well," she commented, dryly. "That was convenient."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Chelsea coughed and hacked as she stood in front of the door of the room that held Jess. Speaking in such a deep voice was really starting to put a strain on her voice. And her hockey mask was starting to feel uncomfortable. Still, she grinned, waiting for the moment that Jess decided to come back out.

**(Confession Cam: "Revenge is sweet and not fattening.")**

** Chelsea—**_(Rubs her hands together.) _"Finally, some revenge…oh, and the chainsaw's fake…I'm just gonna make her freak out and run out of the mansion. Or something like that." _(Revs her chainsaw and laughs maniacally.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()

Finally, Chelsea decided to take things into her own hands. She took a few steps back and ran towards the door. As she got closer, she thrust her foot out, and kicked the door open. As soon as she got in she began searching the room for any sign of her enemy. When she didn't find her, she raised an eyebrow and chuckled.

"Marco…" she said, lowly.

"POLO!" Jess shouted, as she appeared from the secret door in the next room over. She was wielding, for some reason, a wiffle bat. Chelsea was so surprised she forgot she was pretending to be a psychopath.

"Where'd do you have a wiffle bat?" Chelsea asked her, very confused.

"Over there," Jess replied, pointing to the hidden room. "Where'd you get a fake chainsaw?"

"Um…the internet." Chelsea lied. She soon switched to her guttural voice again. "And it is _not_ fake!"

"Riiight." Jess smirked. "I know it's you, Chelsea. Even if you mugged an intern for his fake chainsaw and his hockey mask, I can still tell it's you. Your acting is terrible."

Chelsea whipped her hockey mask off and leered at the prankster. "You seemed scared enough, Skidmore."

"Just trying to get away from you." Jess shrugged. "Can you blame me? But anyways…" Jess wielded the wiffle bat again. "It's your stupid plastic chainsaw against my wiffle bat."

"…how is either of us supposed to win this fight?" Chelsea asked, irritated.

Jess shrugged, again. "Beats me." She raised her wiffle bat. "Now, hold still. This might take a while."

"Oh, yeah right," Chelsea scoffed. She jumped a few steps back. "Why the hell was there a wiffle bat in there room? I mean seriously, that's the only thing you could find in there?" Jess nodded. "That's ridiculous."

Jess grinned, insanely. "Ridiculous? THIS…IS…_CANADA_!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Uh…" Sienna gave her nonconformist friend a concerned look, as the latter started to root through a hallway closet. "You do realize that these are interns, and not actual monsters, right? So you're probably not gonna want to, like, cause them _too_ much damage?"

"Oh, I'm just trying to find something to scare them off," Lacey replied, dismissively. "Ooh, fireworks…"

"Setting buildings on fire is the heroes' thing," Sienna told her friend, rolling her eyes.

Lacey chuckled, and then frowned. "Too bad for Kit-Kat. She should've stuck around longer…but, anyways, is the coast clear?"

"So far, so good," Sienna said, looking around the hallway. "So, should we try to find some heroes and freak them out?"

"I don't know," Lacey admitted. "I'm kind of worried about keeping our own butts safe."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Sienna said. "Don't tell him, because he'd get such a swelled head, but I'm actually a little worried about Logan, y'know? He's probably gotten himself caught already. Idiot…" she sighed, pacing back and forth, up and down the hallway. "He is so dense and so arrogant, he's probably gonna do something stupid like run straight at the traps in this place. I'm sure wrestling a werewolf is on his bucket list…"

As Sienna was saying all this, a vampire-dressed intern quickly popped out of the nearest door, clamped a hand around Lacey's mouth, and dragged her downstairs, despite the nonconformist's muffled curses.

Sienna came to a stop in front of the closet.

"Um…Lacey?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Glisa tiptoed down a flight of stairs, even though every step let out a huge, audible creak.

"Aw, dere is no point to dis…" Glisa sighed, and ran down the stairs instead. In the downstairs area, there were chained up skeletons, and audible moaning and groaning that came from every corner. Glisa shuddered as she slowly walked around, cautiously, in the hopes that she wouldn't startle anything.

Curious, Glisa walked up to a large, bubbling cauldron. She peered inside, into the cauldron's contents, and gasped.

"¡_Dios mío_!" she breathed. "It is…blood?"

**(Confession Cam: Double, double, toil and trouble!)**

** Chef—**"Actually, it's tomato soup. Dinner tonight was grilled cheese."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Startled, Glisa jumped back, and only grew more startled when she heard a voice behind her.

"Oh, hi Glisa! I'm so glad to find someone I recognize—" Damion began, but he was soon cut off when Glisa grabbed the nearest thing (which happened to be a "witch's" broom) and whapped Damion on the head with it.

"DIE ZOMBIE!" Glisa wailed.

"Glisa—" Damion managed to get a word out between every bop on the head. "I'm—not—a—zombie—it's—me—Dami—urgh…" he fell over, and Glisa blinked a few times, before widening her eyes and smiling.

"Oh, _hola_ Damion! Oh…_oh mi_! _Lo siento_, Damion, _lo siento_!"

A green-skinned, broad-shouldered man with stitches on the side of his head.

Glisa was puzzled. "…Chef?"

"That's Mr. Chef…Frankenstein-doctor-lawyer to you!" Chef barked, before marching over and picking up Damion. "And you best be getting' yer butt out of here, before an intern finds you!"

"So, you are not capturing people?" Glisa asked, surprised.

Chef shook his head. "I'm just takin' the injured people back."

"Oh, okay!" Glisa exclaimed, smiling. "Ah, I feel so bad about Damion…wait a second…Jess and Chelsea are with you?" Glisa widened her eyes, when she saw that Chef was dragging a small wagon where Jess and Chelsea sat.

"Hey there," Jess said, half-heartedly, with a wave towards Glisa. Chelsea just crossed her arms and seethed.

"Yup," Chef chuckled. "These two were so decked out in their fight that they fell down the laundry chute. Both have some nasty headaches now…from each other, the fall from the chute, and a wiffle bat. They can barely walk in a straight line."

"Wiffle…bat…?" Glisa repeated, still completely puzzled.

"So," Chef continued, "that makes three campers with minor injuries, which is a major improvement for us. Now didn't I say to get your butt out of here?"

"¡_Señor si señor_!" Glisa said, hurriedly.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane jumped when he heard the door creak open, and he instantly scurried down from the table he had been sitting on, quick to the closet door. From his peripherals he could see a dark figure coming through the door, dragging a baseball bat with him/herself.

Zane held his breath, inwardly cursing himself for not finding a better hiding spot. The figure walked around the room, then took a breath, and sat down on a small bed that the room had. Zane squinted at the person, and breathed a small sigh of relief when he saw that it was actually just Zarya.

Hesitantly, Zane emerged from the closet door, prompting Zarya to threateningly wield her bat.

"Just me, just me!" Zane said, quickly. Zarya nodded and lowered the bat.

Zane looked at her, cautiously. "Don't take this personally…but I think a metal baseball bat is overkill."

Zarya shrugged.

"Can never be too careful," she mumbled.

"Have you run into any trouble, yet?" Zane asked, cautiously sitting next to her on the bed.

Zarya smiled, although it was obscured by her long hair. "I think the sight of me carrying a metal bat scares them off…"

"I don't suppose you have a second bat that I could have?" Zane asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No. You probably couldn't lift one, anyways…"

Zane rolled his eyes.

"Look," Zarya sighed. "If you wanted to keep from being captured…we could…I don't know…" Zane looked at her curiously, but Zarya never got to finish her sentence, because someone burst through the wall, a revved chainsaw in hand, and an insane grin on his face.

"The door was _unlocked_!" Zarya shouted, while Zane just stared at the intern with a rather panicked look on his face. The newcomer, who was covered in blood and had a bolt going through his head, did not respond. Rather, he just raised his chainsaw and started walking towards the two loners. This prompted Zarya to raise her bat in response, while Zane innocently started to scoot away from the scene.

"Um, Zarya, I still think it'd be bad to hit one of Chris's interns with a metal bat…" Zane spoke up, hesitantly.

"I'm _getting_ him to _back off_," Zarya snarled. She advanced upon the intern, but he didn't seem to be all that scared.

"That's a fake chainsaw, right?" Zane mumbled. The bloody-intern-fellow looked at Zarya for a moment, and then ran towards Zane. Zane yelped and started to run, but the intern grabbed Zane and threw him over his shoulder, laughing insanely all the while. The intern carried Zane all the way out of the room.

"What the—" Zarya muttered, and then, louder, as she started chasing after the two of them, "_Get back here_!"

But as Zarya started to run out the door, the floor underneath her crumbled and she fell through the hole that was created. They had been on the first floor, but Zarya landed in another room, where she saw many screens that looked over her fellow campers. Also in the room were Riley and Lacey.

"Zane should be here in a bit," Lacey observed, half-heartedly, as she glanced up at a screen. Zarya looked around her, and saw Chris stationed in front of some of the screens.

"How did you get me to fall into here?" She asked, frowning.

"Well…" Chris chuckled, as he spun around to face her, "it was just a matter of timing…and a very specially built floor. I've got to get some interns to put a carpet over that hole or something. We wouldn't want the others to find out!"

**(Confession Cam: It's not poorly-built, it's just **_**cursed**_**…)**

** Chris—**_(Scratches his head.) _"Actually, the floor wasn't really supposed to crumble. I guess this place is older than we thought…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

A female zombie slowly crept behind Lola, moaning and groaning as she advanced upon the queen bee.

Exasperated, Lola turned around, and gave the zombie a disapproving look. The zombie has poofy black hair, pale white skin, and streaks of blood dripping from her mouth and the sides of her head.

"Really? Cocoa powder, corn syrup, and red food dye? _That's_ what you're using for fake blood? That's like, so home-project-esque. You'd be better off with the real movie deal. At least you'd be more believable. Oh, and your lipstick shade? Sure it looks good, but you're a _zombie_. I'm sure as a zombie you're _soooo_ concerned with making sure your lipstick is a perfect burgundy red."

The zombie glared at her. "Are you quite finished?"

"Why yes, yes I am."

The zombie bared her teeth. "Good. You might want to run. Back at home, I run a five minute mile."

"Oh." Lola laughed, nervously. "Did I mention that I just love the way you make your face really pale? It's a very…ah…nice use of flour."

The zombie raised an eyebrow, and Lola sighed.

"I can consider myself captured, can't I…" she sighed. The zombie nodded.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Seth and Aaron crept down a long stretch of a hallway, nervously taking their time.

"I am so tired of this challenge," Seth groaned. "I hope Riley's okay…"

"I'm sure she's somewhere, safe, watching us win the challenge for her!" Aaron said, with a thumbs up. "Or, she's been eaten by a monster."

Seth rolled his eyes, and then froze as the hallway opened up into a larger area. To the right of Aaron and Seth were five coffins laying on the ground.

"Oh, and of course we wind up in the only room with vampires…" Seth said, grimacing, as he began to back up.

"Ooo! Cool!" Grinning, Aaron ran up to the coffins, despite Seth's protests otherwise. "I wonder if they're related to the bats we saw earlier…"

"Maybe we should get out of here…" Seth suggested, looking around nervously.

"Oh, come on," Aaron laughed. "I doubt they would really stick interns in here." He paused. "Err…knock on wood." He leaned down and rapped his knuckles against the top of the coffin a few times.

"Dude!" Seth shouted, jumping up and down. "It's like you just knocked on their front door!" He and Aaron waited for a moment, but nothing happened. Aaron smirked.

"See?" He said. "Nothing to worry a—" Instantly, the five coffins shot up, and five vampires leaped out of the coffins, screeching like banshees.

"HOLY CRAP!" Aaron wailed, before running over, grabbing Seth's arm, and towing him along as they continued sprinting down the corridor. The vampires followed in close pursuit. Somewhere down the line, Seth tripped, while the vampires began to close the distance between the two of them.

"Go on without me!" Seth exclaimed.

"Okay!" Aaron continued running.

Seth's eyes widened as the vampires grew closer.

"I DIDN'T MEAN IT LITERALLY!" He wailed.

Aaron managed to get pretty far, and by the time he stopped running, he had lost the vampires and he was in a different floor, in a room he didn't recognize. It was dark, so after fumbling around for a bit, he flipped on a switch, only to see a round table where a broad-shouldered monster was playing solitaire.

"Um…hey there," Aaron said, nervously.

"Hhrrrg murgh aaaarghle," the monster growled.

Aaron blinked. "What was that?"

"Hhrrg. Murgh. Aaaarghle," the monster repeated himself.

Aaron shook his head. "I still didn't quite catch that…"

"HHRRGH! MURGH! AAARGHLE!" The monster shouted.

"Speak the queen's English, man!" Aaron exclaimed. The monster pushed over the table, making Aaron jump, and reached for a chainsaw, which seemed to be a very common thing in this mansion.

"Well, actions speak louder than words…" Aaron observed, as he slowly edged towards the exit. "It was very nice meeting you, Mr. Quarterback monster, but I think I should really be…" Aaron rattled the doorknob, but the door wouldn't budge open, much to Aaron's own intense fright and displeasure. "…oh crap."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hey!"

Sienna turned around, to see a relieved-looking Arlen bounding towards her.

"Dudette!" Arlen exclaimed. "Where's the rest of our team?"

"I honestly don't know," Sienna replied, shrugging. "Some are captured, some…are hopefully still around, but I haven't seen anybody since Lacey's disappeared."

"Well, it's a good thing I showed up, then," Arlen chuckled. "You could use an escort like me to keep you safe!"

"Because clearly I haven't been able to handle myself," Sienna said dryly, with a smirk. "So, how have you survived this long?"

"Ha!" Arlen scoffed, as if this were a preposterous question. "No man or beast can scare or outrun me. Except maybe cheetahs. And platypuses. Those things are freaky…"

"Still, we should probably stick together," Sienna advised. "Come on; let's keep moving before…" she grimaced. "I don't know, before something bad happens." The two traversed around the first floor, where they started to open doors to check what was inside, in an attempt to possibly find their missing teammates.

Arlen poked his head through a door and immediately drew it back out.

"Something scary?" Sienna questioned, noticing Arlen's panicked expression.

"A showing of Rocky Horror," Arlen replied, still terrified.

"Well, that's not _too_ bad…"

"It was the _Glee_ version."

"Yikes." The two continued walking.

They opened another door, only to find a large witch's cauldron that was bubbling and hissing. Sienna squinted in confusion when she saw who was stirring it.

"What the…Christine O'Donnell?" **(1)**

In the next door, Sienna saw a headless skeleton marching around the room, singing to himself.

"_And since I am dead, I can take off my head, and recite Shakespearian quotations_…_no animal or man can SCREAM like I can, with the fury of my recitations_!" **(2)**

Sienna sighed and closed the door.

"See anything interesting?" Arlen asked her.

"Nah."

"Damn it," Arlen swore.

Situations like this continued on for a long while, and Sienna and Arlen had checked the entire first floor, until they too eventually fell through the hole that Zarya had left earlier.

"Welcome!" Chris exclaimed. "We probably should've actually patched that thing up…" Sienna groaned and buried her head her hands, while Arlen just widened his eyes suddenly and elbowed Sienna.

"Hey, Sienna, I found our teammates!" He exclaimed, as he gestured towards Lacey, Zarya, Zane, and Lola.

Sienna just groaned louder.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Glisa, feeling paranoid, checked under the table yet again. She was in the dining room and was determined to stay there, considering it was the most spacious room in the mansion. All that was in there was one big dining table and a large chandelier. That didn't stop her from checking under the table every five minutes to make sure that something wasn't hiding underneath there.

When the double-doors to the dining-area suddenly started to open, Glisa tensed and began to reach for the broom that she had been holding on to. Rosetta poked her head through the door just as Glisa ran towards her, broom in hand, shouting about zombies.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Rosetta jumped out of the way of Glisa's broom. "It's me, Rosetta! Still-got-a-beating-heart Rosetta!"

"Oh…" Glisa lowered the broom. "Hi! You reacted faster den Damion did."

Rosetta gave Glisa a speculative look. "Not gonna ask…but anyways, catch any trouble yet?"

"I ran into Chef _abajo_," she said. "And I saw Jess down dere. She and Chelsea got injured while dey were fighting."

Rosetta looked worried. "Are they okay?"

"Dey are okay," Glisa replied. "Chef said it was just a _mal_ headache. Dey were a bit dizzy, too. _Desafortunadamente_, dey are no longer in da game."

"I haven't seen anyone, yet," Rosetta said. "I mean, people we know. I've seen a few interns, but I've outran them. So far." She smiled, half-heartedly. "Anyways, maybe we should stick together? We've probably got a better chance if we stay in a group, right?"

"_Verdad_," Glisa agreed, nodding. "And you are _una chica dura_ so I'm sure we'll be safe!"

"Ah…" Rosetta rubbed the back of her head. "Thanks, Glisa. Um, you wanna stay here, then?"

Glisa shrugged. "Dat's what I've been doing, since it seems to be more open in here."

Rosetta frowned. "What worries me is if Chris is watching this. He could probably send interns after is, depending on what room we're in."

"If dat is da case, perhaps we should get going then, ay?"

Rosetta nodded. "Yup. Let's head out."

The girls began heading out in one direction, but from another room they could hear a large crash. Concerned, the girls ran out in that direction, into the source of the noise. It was the foyer where the campers had entered. In the center of the room, the chandelier that had been hanging was now on the ground. Pieces of the shattered glass and crystal were now scattered all across the floor.

The girls spotted Long, who was standing a safe distance away.

"I think they decided to pull a Phantom of the Opera…" he said, quietly.

"Holy crap," Rosetta said, eyes wide. "Are you okay?" Long nodded. "They weren't trying to hit you, were they?"

"No…" Long shook his head. "I don't think it was even intentional, because there are no interns around. I think this place is just falling apart…"

**(Confession Cam: Catch a tormented soul around here, lately?)**

** Chris—**"It's like really, _really_ old…"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Think you can make your way over here, Long?" Rosetta asked. "Or are there too many pieces around?"

"No, I think I can manage." Long

Long did make it over to the girls, and the second he stopped in front of them, Glisa hugged him.

"You could've died!" She wailed. "You could've gone SMOOSH, and dat would be dat!"

"Um…" Long gave Rosetta a desperate look.

Rosetta gave him a grin. "We're very glad you're not dead, Long. Anyways, let's head upstairs. This challenge has gone on for quite a while…we should find some more teammates and see if we're almost done."

"But what if we are dey only ones left?" Glisa asked, shivering at the thought.

"If we're the only people left, then we must've won! And if there are still some villains left…well, we can outlast them, right, Long?"

"Um, what?" Long snapped out of a trance he had been in.

"Right!" Rosetta repeated, affirmatively. "Let's go!"

The trio walked up the stairs to the hallway above, where, waiting for them, was a hunch-backed, green-skinned, humongous monster…thing. (_With a chainsaw_!) The thing stared at them for a moment, before suddenly roaring and running towards the three of them with surprising speed.

Long, Glisa, and Rosetta took off towards the hallway, while the Benny Hill theme song suddenly got stuck in their heads. What ensued was a chase that could only be compared to the likes of Scooby Doo, with the trio running through doors and appearing out of others. The monster did the same. During that pandemonium, Long lost his shoes, Glisa was giving the monster a piggy-back, and the kids started chasing the monster before realizing their mistake.

This carried on for such a long time, eventually the trio somehow ran straight into Chris's secret base.

"Wait a second!" Rosetta shouted. "How'd we even end up in here?"

"I…honestly have no idea," Chris admitted. He grinned. "But congratulations, the three of you just lost!"

"Is anybody even still in the game?" Glisa asked.

Chris smirked, and gestured to the monitor.

"See for yourself…" he replied.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Jack had not stayed in one place for a long time.

No matter where he went, he could've sworn he felt the same pair of eyes on him. He felt like he was being watched, and if it was an intern it sure wasn't making his/her move. He scowled to himself and kept a brisk walking pace. He had seen some of the heroes, but didn't bother approaching them. The challenge had dragged on so long, though; he would've welcomed anybody's company by now.

He opened the first door he saw in the hopes of finding somebody, and he stepped further inside of the room when he could hear someone walking around. He flicked on a light switch and stepped even further in, but then instantly regretted it when the door behind him slammed shut. He ran towards the handle and tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge.

Jack turned his head when he heard something fall onto the middle of the floor. There was a small DVD case on the floor, and in front of it was a television with everything already set up.

"Let me guess," Jack muttered, as he picked up the DVD and hesitantly put it in the DVD player. "Seven days…?"

He pressed the play button, and to his confusion, it was a scene from an episode from TDI: Heroes Versus Villains. In fact…it was Logan and Isaac.

On the tree branch from the pirate episode.

Jack's eyes widened as Logan uttered his last line to Isaac: "_I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm really not_." As soon as he saw Isaac fall, Jack had seen enough. In a fit of complete anger, he kicked the DVD player so hard it skidded all the way to the wall.

"He's dead. That moron is absolutely _dead_."

The door creaked open.

There was a note on the doorknob: "He's in the next room over."

Jack crumbled it and threw it over his shoulder. Logan wasn't getting away with this, that much was for certain.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"You _son of a bitch_."

Logan jumped. "Dude, you scared me! Hey, good to see you haven't been ambushed by werewolves or zombies or people with chainsaws…which is like, everybody in this frickin' mansion, seriously…"

Jack ignored him. "You screwed Isaac over."

Logan paused as realization hit him. "Oh, right. That…"

Jack grabbed Logan's jacket collar with his hands and pushed him against the wall.

"You told me Isaac _fell behind_."

"Well, that's half true." Logan gave Jack an awkward laugh.

"You are _dead_, Logan. The next challenge we lose, you're out of here."

"Look, dude, I'm sorry about what I did to Isaac. It was pretty heartless. But we were stuck in a frickin' tree, and that Beeper chick wasn't about to leave us alone until one of us, or both of us, got caught."

"You could've figured something out!" Jack snapped back at him. "And don't act sorry, you didn't even _care_ what you did!"

"Huh. I think I've heard this before." Logan's expression grew condescending.

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"This is turning out to be the same fight Riley and Rosetta had," Logan responded, coolly. "And, chances are, this sort of thing is gonna happen again. And again. And again."

"Do you even have a point with this?" Jack growled.

Logan grinned, crookedly. "We're _villains_, Jack."

"And what, having that title means we have to screw people over at every chance we get?"

"Oh what, you think it's just a title? Face it Jack, everybody on our team did _something_ to end up here."

"Yeah, well, most of us didn't betray our teammates," Jack shot back.

"Dude!" Logan growled. "Yes we did. All of the villains did. If not their teammates, then _some_body. Or we played somebody. Or we used dirty tactics. It happens all the time…you're just made that it happened to your bestest buddy Isaac."

"None of us are as bad as we used to be," Jack said, coldly. "Except you."

Logan shook his head. "Riley injured Bren. Someone put up that video of Zane and Zarya..." Jack raised an eyebrow, and Logan shrugged. "Well, it wasn't me. And I'm sure there's stuff people have done that we haven't even heard of yet."

"Well, it doesn't matter anyway," Jack told Logan, firmly. "Because as soon as the campers hear this conversation, then you're out of here."

Logan pointed to something Jack couldn't see, behind him. "Can the threats wait, dude? We have some company."

Jack turned around just in time to see a group of werewolves, vampires, and zombies ambush the two of them.

()()()()()()()()()()

Jack and Logan were brought down into Chris's secret lair, much to their own intense annoyance. The villains gave the two a mixture of looks.

"Wait, weren't they the last ones standing?" Lola questioned.

Chris laughed. "Yeah, about that...haven't you noticed there are a few people missing?"

"Jess, Chelsea, Damion, and…Aaron," Zane murmured, after a quick head count.

"Chelsea, Damion, and Jess were injured!" Glisa piped up. "So…where is Aaron?"

"You showed him on the screen for a little while, Chris," Seth spoke. "Wasn't he cornered by that creepy monster dude? But he was never brought here. That's…odd…"

"Well, let's see what those guys are up to…" Chris suggested, as he wheeled back towards the main screen.

()()()()()()()()()()

Aaron knelt in front of the monster, holding a few flash cards.

"Say it with me," Aaron instructed. "Aaaaaah. Aaaaah."

"Aaaaaaaah," the monster repeated, hesitantly.

"Great!" Aaron exclaimed. "You are _so_ getting your vowels down…!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"He's giving the monster speech therapy?" Sienna shouted in disbelief.

Chris squinted at the screen, rubbing his chin. "Um…the weird thing is…I don't think that guy is an intern…"

The campers exchanged quick glances, and then ran off desperately to find Aaron.

Jack grabbed Lacey's shoulder on the way out.

"Hey, I've got your vote tonight, right?" He asked, hopefully.

"Wait, for the bonfire ceremony?" Lacey asked. "Uh, for Logan I'm guessing, right? Why are you so pissed off at him?"

Jack blinked a few times before answering. "Didn't Chris show you guys that scene between Logan and I? Didn't you hear what he did?"

Lacey gave Jack a puzzled look. "Chris had the volume off, so nobody could hear us from down below here. None of us could hear a thing you guys were saying."

Jack froze. Nobody hear Logan confess what he had done. All they saw was Jack waste time fighting with Logan when they could've been escaping from some monsters.

Jack's eyes met with Logan's, and the latter just grinned and winked.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The eight villains sat on the stumps of the bonfire ceremony, while Chris walked up to them in his vampire costume.

"Good evening…" he chuckled, again. "You guys put up quite the fight, but it wasn't quite enough…now, you must face the all-powerful judgment of your fellow campers. Let's begin, shall we? The first marshmallow goes to Sienna. Arlen. Lacey. Zane and Zarya. Lola."

The two rivals gave each other huge glares.

"You two…well, what can I say? Logan, _apparently_ you betrayed Jack's bestest bestest buddy Isaac. And Jack…you might've lost the challenge for the villains. But the last marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Logan."

"What?" Lola objected, while Jack just clenched his teeth together and walked to the Dock of Shame. Logan, pleased, walked over to the other side of the campfire, where Sienna gave him a smile.

"This is ridiculous," Lacey muttered. She stood up and shoved her hands in her pockets. "I'm going to bed."

**(Confession Cam: The deciding votes…)**

** Before the elimination:**

** Zane—**"Well, it seems Zarya and I are the only ones who don't have the most obvious takes on this. It took me a long time, but…" _(Sighs.) _"I have to vote for Jack. I like him better than Logan, but he lost the challenge for us today. And Logan…Logan's determined to win, and that's what we need right now."

**Zarya—**"Ditto." _(Nonchalantly turns the camera off.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Confession Cam: And how!)**

** Lacey—**"Just screw it, okay? Jack never felt that way about me, and that's okay, I can get over that. But he was better than Logan. He wasn't an absolute moron, so just…whatever. That's all I've got…"

**Lola—**"Ugh! Jack could've been such an important piece in this game! So smart…and _soooo_ hot."

()()()()()()()()()

** (Confession Cam: Final words, back and angrier than ever!)**

** Jack—**"Well, that's that. Maybe Logan had a point. Everybody on the villain team is a villain, and that's all they'll ever be." _(Bitterly turns the camera off.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Damion?"

Damion, who was making his way back from the communal bathrooms, blinked a few times, wondering if the hits on his head were starting to have him hallucinate. But no matter how many times he rubbed his eyes and blinked, he still saw him.

"…Mo?" Damion grinned. "Holy cow! Mo, how'd you get back on the island?"

"Long story," Mo laughed. "But look, there's something important I need to tell you. There's a bit of a problem…" Mo leaned over and whispered something into Damion's ears, whose expression slowly changed to shock as Mo continued speaking.

When Mo pulled away, Damion shook his head.

"I…okay, what they did was kind of bad but I don't think I'd be right to—"

Mo cut him off by leaning forward again and kissing him.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane was walking around the campground, but he stopped and listened as he heard Chef and Chris talking from around the corner.

"Dude, how did Jack find out about Isaac?" Chris was asking Chef. "Nobody on the island would know, except for maybe the people at the Playa de Losers, when they saw the…" Chris stopped talking for a moment, and Zane could hear him slap his forehead. "Oh man. Someone snuck back onto the island! How'd this happen?"

"I have no idea," Chef lied.

**(Confession Cam: If the price is right…)**

** Chef—**"Then again, I only know how Mo or Monique or whatever got back on the island. Isaac must've been the one to tip off Jack; I have no idea how _that_ happened…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Well, it must've been Isaac," Chris continued, affirming Chef's guess. "And what, did he sneak into the video room, up in the back room of the arts and crafts center? Find the clip of the camera that taped that scene, burn it to a CD, and find a time to give it to Jack? Sheesh, all that for revenge, and a revenge plot that didn't even work. What a waste."

Zane, suddenly realizing how he could prove his innocence to Zarya, ran off to the arts and crafts center.

Chris, oblivious to this, continued cheerfully to Chef: "It's a good thing we started locking that place up!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(A.N.) **Ahaha…a bit too evil, right? Sorry! But hey, I'm only a week late from Halloween! Anyways, thank you for reading, and thank you guys for all the nice feedback, I really appreciate it.

Some of the characters kind of took a backseat in this chapter, but oh well. Hope you guys enjoyed it!

**Eliminated list: **Laura, Demi, Isaac, Riley F, Mo, Kit-Kat, Bren, Jack

Oh, and there's a **new poll**.

**(1) **Yes, a dumb joke, but a joke I hope you guys get nonetheless.

**(2) **_The__ Nightmare Before Christmas_ reference!


	13. Damsel In Distress

** (A.N.) **I'm so sorry it's been so long, everybody. Blame on that stupid "school" thing.

…I'm probably gonna have to stop putting author's notes up here. I'm pretty sure I've never mentioned anything up here besides mentioning how I never have anything to mention up here.

_So_.

This chapter's brought to you by: the department of redundancy department. The department of redundancy department. The department of—**shot**

Enjoy the update, everybody!

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

_(Chris's recap)_

"Last time, on Total Drama Island…

"The campers had some fun in a haunted mansion filled with monsters, mystery, mayhem, and chainsaws! And wiffle bats, too! Chelsea and Jess had a catfight—which was _off-screen_, sorry. Seth and Riley shared their first kiss…too bad that it was a complete accident, thanks to Aaron's meddling.

"Jack discovered Logan's part in Isaac's elimination, and confronted him about it. The dude was _pissed_. The campers who were all watching the scene had no idea what was going on, because the volume in our super awesome secret-base was turned off. So, the fight between the boys drew attention to them and caused the two to be found by the monsters and eliminated. Aaron managed to befriend a monster and stayed safe long enough to score a win for the heroes.

"After a very confusing elimination, Jack was sent home, Lacey and Lola were left bitter, and since we have the word 'drama' in our title, I'd say all is right with the world!

"So, who will the villains cope with their shattered trust? When will this show stop coming off like a soap opera? When will Seth man up and ask Riley out? And is Bill Nye the Science Guy _really_ a science guy? And who will be eliminated, on the most dramatic campfire ceremony ever?

"…_two_ of those questions will be answered, right here, on _TDI: Heroes Versus Villains_!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Ugh, my head…"

Seth blinked a few times, as his vision gradually returned to him. The room he was in danced around him and eventually focused. Seth's eyes widened as soon as he realized that he had absolutely no idea where the heck he was. It was a dark, windowless room. There were two strips of flickering fluorescent lights. A television screen sat a few yards ahead of him. There was also a door on the opposite side of the room, but Seth realized that he couldn't reach it because his wrists were behind his chair and tied.

He blinked a few times. "What's…going on…?"

"You're tied to a chair. That's about as specific as I'm gonna get," A female voice commented, in a bored, drawling voice. Seth turned his head, and wasn't that surprised to see that it was Zarya, although the circumstances were still rather odd, in his mind.

"…can I ask why?"

"No," Zarya replied, bluntly.

"Oh." Seth dropped it for a moment, and then tried again, awkwardly: "Um…please?"

"I'll give you a hint. It happens every single episode."

"We pass off self-deprecation as humor?" Seth guessed.

"No." Zarya raised an eyebrow. "It's challenge time."

"Okay, I got it…" Seth mused. "So the heroes have to rescue me then?" Zarya nodded. "And I guess we get to watch their progress from that TV, right?" Another nod. "Cool, cool…" he looked down, and suddenly gave out a yelp. "Why am I in a dress?" True enough, Seth was in a pink, fluffy, fairy-princess-esque dress, complete with a pointy pink hat that had ribbons coming out of the top.

Finally, Zarya elicited a small smile. "Just…all part of the challenge."

"How does putting me in a dress have any relevance to the challenge?"

Zarya shrugged. "I guess we're going for a Mario-saves-Peach sort of theme, here." She paused, awkwardly, as Seth continued to seethe. "If it's any consolation, the dress is very slimming."

"THAT'S NOT CONSOLING AT ALL!"

()()()()()()()()()()

The remaining fourteen campers munched on their delightfully adequate breakfast, making random chit-chat with each other. Everything was surprisingly calm.

**(Confession Cam: Or **_**was**_** it…?)**

** Lacey—**"Yeah, I'm not stupid. Obviously Logan did something bad. Something earlier in the competition, anyways." _(Raises an eyebrow.) _"Heck, not like I know what it is. All I know is that Shirtless McMoron better not screw with me, or he's getting a fistful of…" _(Pauses, awkwardly.) _"Uh…fist? I probably should've planned that out beforehand…"

** Sienna—**"Hm, I'm impressed. Both Lola and Lacey seem to be pretty over Jack's elimination. Easy come, easy go, huh? Anyways, we're not touchy-feely like those hero guys. We have more important things to worry about than boys."

**(Caption Reads: "Like, five minutes later")**

** Sienna—**"Oh my GOD, why is Logan such an idiot? He prances in her all cocky and then starts flirting with every girl that breathes! Ugh! I swear, his only redeeming quality is that he's, like, really hot!" _(This goes on for a while.)_

()()()()()()()()()()

Breakfast ended after another twenty minutes or so, and the host that everybody loved (at least, as far as he was concerned) entered the mess hall.

"Challenge time, campers!"

Aforementioned campers groaned. Chris, however, kept his grin as he strode into the mess hall.

"So, I'm bet you're wondering why two of your campers are missing, right?" he asked. The campers looked confused, and after an awkward moment, Chris slapped his forehead. "Nobody noticed that Seth and Zarya were missing?" Zane raised his hand slightly, but lowered it when he saw that he was the only one.

Chris muttered to himself for a bit, and then continued, louder: "Well, then, let me explain this all to you. Seth has been kidnapped! He is your damsel in distress, heroes!"

"Heh," Logan snickered. "You called Seth a girl."

"Way to go, Captain Obvious," Zane said, twirling a finger in the air.

Chris glared at Logan. "It's not funny if you explain the joke, dude. But, anyways! Here's the deal! You guys have until sundown to rescue him! And…" Chris looked around. "Villains, Chef will show you guys where Seth is being held. Heroes, you have to stay here. After all, you can't know where Seth is being kept!"

"Are you keeping something from us?" Riley guessed.

"What makes you say that?" Chris asked, innocently.

"Every single episode of this stupid show, Chris," replied Riley, bluntly. Chris smirked.

"I may be," he said. "I may not be. But, you guys will find out eventually, right? So, villains, go meet Chef out back! Heroes, keep your butts glued to those chairs! Everybody move!"

"But I thought you said—" Glisa spoke up.

"By _everybody_ I meant the villains!" Chris shouted, covering up quickly.

"Because we're the only ones who count!" Arlen added, as he and his teammates went through the kitchen door. "Later, losers!"

**(Confession Cam: Begin quest!)**

** Damion—**_(Thoughtfully)_, "Not that I really should ever listen to anything Arlen says…ever…but something he said made me realize something. Chris probably favors the villains, doesn't he? Doesn't it seem like the villains get more upper hands than we ever do? More leniency for the stupid crap they do? Well, it's Chris, so I really shouldn't be all that surprised…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"I hope Seth's alright," Riley remarked, as the heroes impatiently waited for Chris to return with further instructions. "I must admit, labeling a dude 'the damsel' is probably not the best for the ego."

"True, true," Jess agreed, absentmindedly tossing a spray paint can back and forth in her hands. "At least he gets to sit out this challenge. Well, unless they're putting him through some sort of terrible torture," she added, lightly. Riley grimaced and winced.

"I'm kind of wondering how elaborate the villains' defense is, here," Rosetta commented, resting her chin in her palm. "How can they hold back our entire team? It must be really hard to reach Seth, otherwise this is just gonna turn into a giant game of 'Red Rover'."

"I always hated that game," Aaron complained. "5th grade, I went straight for Billy the Burrito—"

"The Burrito?" Jess echoed.

"Just a nickname," Aaron informed her.

"Now there's a name to run away from," Rosetta chuckled.

"I wonder what you have to do to order to score a nickname like that," Damion agreed, with an expression that was somewhere between being puzzled and just plain creeped out.

For some reason, Aaron shuddered at Damion's pondering.

"I'd rather not talk about it," he whimpered.

"Ah, so what happened, Aaron?" Glisa asked.

"I ran straight into the muscled arm of an iron-pumping 100-pound fifth-grader, that's what happened!" Aaron cried indignantly. "I rebounded off and hit my head on the concrete. When I finally came to, the eighth graders were laughing at me, my classmates were so ashamed that they excommunicated me from the fifth grade, and there were traffic cones…_everywhere_…"

Glisa, struck with emotion at the story, sobbed into her handkerchief.

"Did any of that actually happen?" Rosetta asked, half-heartedly.

"MAYBE!"

With perfect time, Chris re-entered the mess hall.

"Alright, heroes! You guys ready for your quest?"

Long blinked, slowly. "Our…quest…?"

"Dude, when did we exit TDI and enter WoW?" Riley laughed.

"Well, here's the deal," Chris announced, walking towards the heroes table. "You guys have till sundown till rescue Seth. But…it's not quite as simple as you might like it to be. See, you're jumping to the final castle right from the beginning!"

"Reducis tu velocidad!" Glisa begged. "What on Earth are you talking about?"

"I think he's saying that it's gonna be really hard to reach Seth because he's in the toughest place to get through," Riley answered. "Um, at least I hope so. I mean, I'm supposed to be the gamer here, I really should know these things…"

"Nah, you hit the nail on the head," Chris told her. "The seven villains are guarding one giant—"

"If you say that a castle magically appeared during the night I'm going to _throw a tree at you_," Jess threatened, jumping up with a rather large amount of anger. Chris coughed, and took a step back.

"Building," he finished. "It's a big…building…thing. The one that you and Rosetta went through in the spy challenge."

"Oh." Jess at back down. "Alright then."

"So are we allowed to head over there now, then?" Long questioned.

"Yes!" Chris answered. The heroes stood up. "And by now I meant in two hours!"

"What?" Jess objected. "Oh come on!" Chris shrugged, unperturbed.

"Yeah, well, we need more time to set up! You guys still have, like, a whole freaking day to do this! I wouldn't be complaining! Now…go do…um…whatever it is you guys do, I guess. I'll be…somewhere else?" And with those incredibly two vague ending sentences, Chris awkwardly retreated back into the kitchen.

"Hmmph," Jess grumbled. "C'mon, guys, let's…" she paused. "What do we do again?"

"Advance subplots," Damion piped up.

"Right, right." Jess nodded. "Let's go!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroines retired to their cabin, and the girls occupied themselves with books, magazines, and such. Rosetta left after a half hour to take a shower in the communal bathrooms and, about five minutes later, the door knocked.

"Huh, that was quick," Riley mused, hopping off of her bed. "I didn't think we locked the door…" she walked over and opened the door, suspecting to see Rosetta…but it wasn't her. Riley's expression changed from confusion to anger in a split second. "You," she snarled. "Jerk."

Riley Fox stood in the doorway, looking uncharacteristically nervous.

"Hey, Riley," said Riley F., awkwardly. "Is Rosetta in there?"

"No," Riley S. snapped in reply, bluntly. "Go away."

"Please," Riley F. pleaded. "I just want to talk to her."

"Get out of here," reiterated Riley S., angrily. "Right now, or I'll tell Chris that you're here!"

A bout of cockiness returned to Riley F. for a moment, "Considering I'm stirring up drama right now, I don't think he'd mind…"

Riley S. hit him in the shoulder. "Ow! Okay, seriously! Please just let me talk to Rosetta!"

"She's not here," Riley repeated. "Now get the heck out of here, you annoying pain in the—"

"Riley, who are you chewing out over there?" Jess asked, walking to the front door in confusion. Her draw dropped when she saw who it was, and she soon furrowed her eyebrows in indignation as well. "YOU!" She declared furiously. Riley F. slapped his forehead. "You stupid, stupid person!" Jess barked, rounding on Riley. "You carrot-topped, pit-hole-digging, heart-breaking, big-mouthed, arrogant _MORON_!" She turned to Riley S. "Did I miss anything?"

"His goggles are stupid," Riley added, stiffly.

"Yeah!" Jess wheeled back to Riley F. "Your goggles are _very_ stupid, indeed!"

"Okay, I deserve…90% of that," Riley F. admitted, defensively messing with his goggles. "But I've been miserable at the Playa des Losers ever since I've been eliminated. I paid Chef to bring me back here, and I've been trying to find the right moment to make things right with her…"

"No! No, no, no!" Jess stopped him. "Rosetta was miserable for challenges after you left because she broke up with you—"

"Actually," Riley F. added, weakly, "I'm the one who broke up with her."

"WHAT?" Jess shouted. "You—freaking—ARGH!"

"I know, I know!" Riley F. groaned. "I was stupid back then, though, I know I made a mistake."

"Oh, you're 100% stupid, 100% of the time," Riley growled. "Rosetta's finally gotten over you, and you cannot just show up here and expect to win. Her. _Back_. It doesn't work that way, my friend. Now I suggest you get out of here, before Jess beats you to death with a wiffle bat."

"A…wiffle bat…?" Riley F. repeated, slowly.

"Yes, a wiffle bat," Jess repeated, gruffly.

Riley rolled his eyes. "Forgive me if I'm not intimidated."

"Glisa!" Jess shouted into the cabin. "Get my wiffle bat!" Glisa popped her ear-buds out of her iPod, curious at the interruption. She grabbed Jess's wiffle bat and walked out the cabin door, then widened her eyes when she saw who it was.

"YOU!" She shouted, and Riley slapped his forehead multiple times. "_Idioto estúpido!" _She continued insulting him, all the while brandishing the wiffle bat in a surprisingly threatening manner.

"Aw, jeez," Riley F. groaned, before finally backing up and running towards the woods.

"That guy is a nut if he thinks he can fix what he did," Riley S. muttered sourly. "Nobody tell Rosetta that he's here, alright? We still better tell Chris, though. Normally I wouldn't want to tell on somebody but…"

"Don't worry," Jess agreed, still glaring into the distance. "We know…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Damion nervously leaned against the heroes' cabin railing, staring down at the ground. He thought back to the night of the Halloween challenge, how surprising and great it had been Mo, but now it just seemed too…confusing. Mo seemed really…different. And what Mo had revealed to him wasn't making things any easier…

_So…_Damion thought to himself. _Seth, Bren, and Riley were in an alliance. They'd been discussing which heroes to pick off, but…I mean, stuff like that happens all the time in games like this. And besides, all three of them are my friends. I can't just…no, that'd be too mean…_

Aaron startled his thoughts by jumping in next to him and slapping his friend and the back.

"What's up, dude?" Aaron asked, cheerfully. "Excited for the challenge?"

"Oh, I don't know," Damion laughed. "I'm a little worried that Seth might be stuck in that…dungeon-building-place longer than he'd like."

"It can't be that bad, right?" Aaron mused.

**ELSEWHERE:**

"AH!" Seth wailed, thrashing in his chair. "Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop!"

"Sorry, Seth," Zarya chuckled, not sounding sorry at all. "But you're not done yet." She turned up the volume on the TV. "Only five more episodes and we finish this season of _Jersey Shore_…"

"Doesn't this bother you too?" Seth questioned.

"Earplugs," Zarya replied. She closed her eyes. "I think that's what you said, anyways. Either that or you asked if I'm from Kalamazoo. Which…I'm not."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So, dude, you okay? You've been watching the grass grow for like, half an hour," Aaron commented.

"Oh, definitely!" Damion assured him. "I mean, yeah, everything's cool. And in case you're wondering, one particular blade of grass looks like it has the potential to grow maybe a full quarter of an inch."

"Ooh, I wouldn't want to miss that," Aaron agreed, leaning against the railing with Damion. Damion glanced at Aaron, curiously, and then smiled a bit.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

_"OKAY!" _Chris shouted via intercom, so abruptly that everyone who heard it jumped a foot. _"WE'RE TOTALLY READY, NOW!"_

"YOU'RE ON AN INTERCOM!" Rosetta exclaimed. "WHY THE HECK ARE YOU SHOUTING?" Obviously, Chris couldn't hear her, so he continued in his unusually loud tone.

_"EVERYONE GO TO THE CAPTURE THE FLAG FIELD! WE HAVE A BOAT TO TAKE YOU TO THE BUILDING!"_

"SO MUCH CAPS LOCK!" Aaron wailed.

"LOUD NOISES!" Riley shouted, for the heck of it.

"Um…" Long mumbled, being a bit of a combo-breaker, and peeking up from his poetry book to look at his fellow heroes. "Can we just go over there now? Please?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Just as big as you remember, huh?" Jess commented, elbowing Rosetta. The heroes were crowded on the Boat of Losers, slowly moving towards their destination.

"Nah, I think it ate several smaller buildings since the last time we've been here," Rosetta deadpanned in response. This didn't seem that far off of a guess. There were several towers towering up from the building now, giving the whole place the look of a castle constructed on a low budget. A really, really low budget.

The boat pulled up to the shore and the heroes climbed out. They walked up to the building, appraising it and how incredibly ridiculously humongous it really was.

"Sooo…" Damion said, awkwardly. "Anyone got any bright ideas?"

"Let us try the front door!" Aaron declared. He walked over to said door, and tried to open the door…it was locked. Dejectedly, he walked back towards the group of heroes. "Okay…I'm out of ideas."

"Back door?" Jess suggested.

It was locked too.

**ELSEWHERE:**

Zarya had finally changed the TV from _Jersey Shore_ to the actual filming of today's episode, so Seth could see what his friends were doing.

Zarya stifled a chuckle as she watched the heroes hopelessly and awkwardly standing outside of the building. Even after the 'front-door-back-door' thing, even Seth had to groan.

"I'd slap my forehead if I could move my arms…" he sighed.

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Well, I see only one option here," Riley declared, cracking her knuckles. "Clearly, we must cut down a tree and ram open the door with it."

"That won't be necessary…" Long told Riley, quietly. Riley turned towards Long; the loner was holding the door in his hands. "I think I broke it…"

"Not to give the cliché phrase here," Riley responded, laughing, "but…you _think_?"

Long smiled, awkwardly, as the heroes filed in the building, each of them thanking Long or complementing him.

**(Confession Cam: Causing a raucous ruckus)**

** Chris—**"What is this nonsense? We can't have the team getting _along_!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

The lights flicked on in the base floor, and the heroes looked around, curiously.

"Funny," Jess mused. "This building's bigger but this room seems smaller since the last time we were here. But, ah…I don't see anybody. Or anything." Curious, the heroes continued venturing forwards, until Arlen leapt from the shadows.

"Ha!" He shouted. "You shall not pass!"

The heroes glanced at each other, and calmly walked past him.

"Hey, no fair!" Arlen complained, but the heroes ignored him. A sign was hanging over a door at the opposite side of the room, reading: "Level Two".

"Well…" Riley mused. "The first level's always the easiest, right?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"That was Arlen's defense plan?" Seth questioned, struggling to not laugh.

"…shut up," Zarya muttered.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The second room that the heroes entered had a carpet with a floral design on it, and the room looked liked it was covered with dark bark. There were even some pots with white flowers in them littered around.

"This…looks familiar…" Riley mumbled, as she stepped forwards.

"Hey guys!" Aaron said, cheerfully. "Look! It says here on this little wooden sign that if we all stand on this weighting panel that our combined weight will open up the next door for us because it's currently locked!"

"That's oddly specific," Long commented.

Still, the heroes all shuffled on the little metal panel in the middle of the room (Riley was the last—she seemed wary of something). As soon as Riley stepped on, though, a cage dropped from the ceiling and trapped the heroes inside.

"Dramatic irony, anyone?" Jess quipped.

"Dis is de third time I've been in a cage in dis show!" Glisa shouted. "Why de heck does dis keep happening?"

"Well, I can answer one-third of that question," Zane commented, walking through the door. He wore a little rope necklace that had a key attached to the end of it. "I'm sorry that you fell for my trap, but this is the end for you."

"Wow, that really was some high-class villainous dialog," Riley commented, staring up into space, "but, ah, this isn't really your trap."

"Um…" Zane raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"Well, this is an exact replica of the trap found in Paper Mario: _The Thousand Year Door_. Except you had a bunch of little punis following you around in that game. I mean, jeez, even if this room is pretty much a replica of that level. So, uh, no, this isn't really your trap. Unfortunately, escaping from this cage, in that game, involved flipping into a linear version of yourself and moving between the bars. And, despite being 2D…I'm pretty sure we can't do that."

"Dude," Jess said, looking at Riley with a grin, "it's like your speaking another language."

Riley grinned back, and shrugged, innocently.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Your girlfriend really does know her video games," Zarya commented.

"Yeah…" Seth sighed, happily. "Too bad that won't get them out of there." And then, as an afterthought, "and Riley's not my girlfriend…"

Zarya gave him a strange look, and smirked a little bit.

"What?" Seth asked, a bit irritated.

"Nothing," Zarya said.

Seth scowled. "Just tell me."

Zarya glanced towards Seth. "You can't spit it out, huh?"

Seth was confused for a moment, until he finally understood what Zarya was alluding to. "I don't even know if she likes me too, okay?" Seth sighed.

Zarya shrugged. "Hey, it's none of my business."

A moment passed, and Seth sighed again. "Maybe it's the dress that's making me emotional, but I'm just really mad at myself because I know it'd make things easier if I just asked her out but I can never seem to get the courage to just tell her I want to go out with her."

"Hm," Zarya said, monotonously.

Seth smirked. "Thanks for the positive reinforcement."

"Well, sorry I don't feel like playing therapist today, okay? Besides, it's not like I don't have problems of my own."

"Zane?" Seth guessed. Zarya scowled and ignored him.

"What's it to you?" She muttered.

"Well, hey," Seth commented, a little jokingly, now. "It's none of my business…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So, tell me, Zane," Riley mused, lazily draping her arms through the gaps between the bars. "Are you guys required to put an exit in your traps? Is there supposed to be a way out for us, or…?"

"I can neither confirm nor deny that," Zane replied, calmly. He was already sitting in a corner, eyes glued to a book.

"Hm." Riley frowned. "Y'know, this isn't very nice, considering I saved your butt from Effie." Zane scowled, but didn't say anything. "Yeah, you would be B-B-Q if I really had decided to take the boat…buy hey, I'm a hero, it's what I do. No thanks necessary." A moment passed by in silence, but it definitely didn't last long. "Sooo…what'cha reading?" Zane, with a sigh, held up the book cover for Riley to see. "Aw, never mind, I can't see the title from here. Maybe you can just read it aloud for me and I'll see if I can guess!"

"Is there a point to this incessant talk, Riley?" Zane asked, setting his book down with a frown.

"Well," Riley replied, "it covered up the noise of Jess picking open the cage's lock."

_Click!_

Zane, wide-eyed, turned his head to the other end of the cage, where Jess stood, triumphantly.

"And…that's my cue," Zane said, a little nervous now. "Villain exits, stage left." He hurriedly disappeared down to level one.

"Nice job, Jess," Rosetta complimented the prankster.

"Ha, piece of cake," Jess chuckled. "Let's see what's waiting for us on level three, shall we?"

()()()()()()()()()()

"And what, pray tell, is waiting for them on level three?" asked Seth.

Zarya shrugged. "More wacky shenanigans. Does it really matter?"

Seth pondered this for a moment. "I guess not…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Aw, dang it," Riley groaned, slapping her forehead.

"Wait; is there something bad about this room?" Long questioned. It didn't seem like it. It was beach-themed, very friendly looking place. Riley just shook her head and pointed to something lying on the ground. It was a blue, metallic circle, about the size of Riley's palm, with a circle engraved in the middle.

"_Super Mario Sunshine_," she sighed, as she walked over and picked up the blue coin. "We've got nine more blue coins to find."

"And they're all in this room, huh?" Damion mused. He looked around at the fake palm trees. "Where's that Jamaican music coming from?"

"Over here, mon," chuckled Chelsea, lazily tapping on some bongos.

"Huh…I didn't think we'd see you here," Glisa commented.

"Yeah…" Jess agreed, raising an eyebrow. "I figured you'd be in the level that required us to dodge giant fireballs."

Chelsea winked, but surprisingly, didn't even stand up to argue with her enemy. "Don't give me ideas, Skidmore."

"So, every level has some sort of reference to a Mario game?" Rosetta asked.

"What, exactly, did the first level reference?" Aaron asked, confused. "If that was supposed to represent a video game that is definitely not something I'd want to play."

"Meh." Chelsea shrugged. "Let's just say he was modeling the levels that teach you how to play the game."

Riley cracked a grin. "You just made that up, didn't you? You probably just stuck him down on that level and told him to figure it out himself."

Chelsea held a finger up to her lips. "Yeah, maybe. Anyways, your challenge for this level—" she supplied the drum roll herself, "is to find the other nine blue coins while I play…_reggae music_."

"NO!" Aaron wailed, dropping to his knees. "SPARE US, PLEASE!"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh, jeez," Seth said, with a wince. "And I thought _I_ had it rough."

"Yeah…" Zarya agreed. She held out two small objects for Seth. "Earplugs? She's gonna be singing, too."

"Thanks, but ah," Seth smiled, awkwardly. "I can't use my hands."

"Oh, yeah." Zarya said. She put her own earplugs in. "Sucks to be you."

()()()()()()()()()

"Oh, hey, I found one on top of the tree," Damion said, throwing a blue coin down to the ground. "And on that note, where in Canada to they sell fake, life-sized palm trees, exactly?"

Chelsea was too busy singing Michael Franti to provide an explanation.

"I believe I see a coin in da kiddy pool," Glisa commented.

"Can you jump in and get it?" Riley asked, who was preoccupied by digging in a sandbox that was in the corner.

"Ah…I would prefer not to."

Riley frowned. "How come?"

A huge shark jumped up from the waters, and disappeared back into the pool.

Riley's eye twitched. "Just how deep is that pool, exactly?"

Glisa blinked down into the pool. "I'm really not sure…"

Aaron laughed, nervously. "Any chance you'll jump in there anyways?"

"NO WAY, COMPADRE!" Glisa shouted, so loudly that everybody jumped. "I've already jumped into shark infested waters once in this show, and dat time was enough _para mí!__"_

_ "I'll do it…" Long sighed. Glisa was about to protest, but Long already jumped in the law-of-physics-defying kiddy pool. A moment later, Long jumped out of the pool, blue coin in hand, and completely unscathed. _

_ "The shark did not attack you?" Glisa gasped._

_ "Huh?" Long looked back. "Oh, no…I guess we're cool." It appeared that Long and the shark were, in fact, 'cool', because the shark popped up and gave Long a thumbs up._

_ "Please, please, please tell me this isn't some metaphor for us jumping the shark," Jess muttered under her breath. _

_ Meanwhile, Rosetta had picked up Chelsea's bongos and cut into the drumheads with a pair of scissors from hammerspace. A blue coin fell out from each drumhead._

_ "Wow, how'd you guess they'd be in there, Rosetta?" Damion asked._

_ "How'd I guess what?" Rosetta asked, confused. She looked down at the blue coins. "Oh yeah, the coins. No, I just kind of wanted the reggae music to stop."_

_ Jess gave her a mocking little bow. "And for that, we thank you."_

_ Chelsea shrugged. "It's not like the drums cost me anything. It's sure good we have a great budget in this reality, otherwise we couldn't have all this s—"_

_ "I found one!" Riley declared triumphantly holding up a blue coin. "That makes six." _

"We still have four more left to find?" Aaron complained. "Man alive, this must've been irritating to do in the games."

Riley smirked. "Try doing them in every level."

"The door won't open until we get all ten, huh?" Jess asked. Chelsea nodded. Jess smirked, and took out a can of spray paint. "Personally, I've always been a fan of cheat codes."

Chelsea's eyes widened. "You'd better watch yourself, Skidmore…" she looked towards the heroes. "Aren't you guys supposed to be discouraging this?"

"Normally, yes," Rosetta agreed. "But we've got five more levels to go and this has already dragged on for a page and a half."

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Yes!" Seth grinned. "Nice going, team!"

"They can't hear you," Zarya pointed out.

"Don't you ever yell at the TV when you're watching sports?" Seth asked her, confused.

Zarya looked just as confused. "No…what's the point if they can't hear you?"

Seth wasn't sure how to answer.

()()()()()()()()()()

After 'coaxing' out the location of the other blue coins from Chelsea, the heroes went up to the fourth floor.

"WHOA!" Jess dropped to the floor as a barrage of tennis balls shot at her (and unfortunately hit Aaron, behind her).

"Ooh…I'll…protect you Jess…" Aaron said, dizzily. He took a few steps forward and fell down.

"Ha!" Logan smirked, from the opposite side of the room. "Score one for me."

"And, ladies and gentlemen…" Riley said, slowly, as she walked into the room. "The Mario sports room. Although, I don't believe this is really how you're supposed to play tennis."

"Meh, it's more fun when you play by my rules," Logan replied. "Anyways, you might want to stay back—this also doubles as an automatic baseball pitcher."

Long stepped in, looked down at the injured Aaron, frowned, picked a tennis racket up off the ground, and started walking towards Logan. Logan blinked a few times, shrugged, smirked, and turned the machine on again. It shot out a few tennis balls and Long hit them straight back. At Logan's head. Logan swayed a bit, and then fell to the ground.

Long raised an eyebrow, and chuckled quietly. "So, does that mean I win?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Well that was anticlimactic," Seth observed. "But awesome nonetheless! Yeah!" He turned to Zarya. "So, is this room, with you and me, supposed to be 'level eight' for the campers?"

Zarya nodded.

"And how do you plan on holding them off?"

Zarya smirked, but did not reply.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Once again, as the heroes walked into the door, something was thrown at their heads. As they all let out yells and dropped to the ground, a barrel smashed against the wall above them.

"SERIOUSLY?" Riley shouted. "Of all the possibilities, THIS is what you pick!"

"Oh, come on!" Lacey chuckled. She was standing on the opposite side of the room, but a long ramp led up to the door she stood in front of. And she had many, many barrels beside her. "You have to love the classics!"

"Great, so what do we do now?" asked Damion.

"Can't we just stall her out until she runs out of barrels?" Glisa suggested.

"Yeah, but she's not gonna throw the barrels unless we're walking up the ramp," Long pointed out.

"True," Riley agreed, and then she beamed at the loner. "Hey, you're opening up again!"

"Ah…" Long cleared his throat, awkwardly and looked away.

"Anyways…" Jess said. "Who's up to getting barrels thrown at their head?"

None of the heroes seemed particularly excited for this job.

"I feel like we should get into a triangle shape so she'll have an easier time bowling us down," Rosetta sighed. "Ah, I guess I'll go." And then, muttering to herself, "…killed by barrels…what a way to go…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Seth couldn't help but roll his eyes when he saw the caption underneath the screen, as Rosetta began to walk up the ramp. It read:

**ROSETTA HAWTHORNE. WORLD 8-5. LIVES: SOON TO BE ZERO.**

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh, dis is terrible!" Glisa sighed, shaking her head. "Rosetta will get injured for sure!"

"Ugh," Jess sighed, holding up a still slightly-unconscious Aaron up. "I sure hope not. I don't think we can afford another casualty."

"I wonder where they got all these props, still," Damion mused. "I mean, where do you even find _barrels_ anymore?"

"I've learned not to question this show anymore," Jess chuckled, lightly.

"Just go with the flow," Riley agreed. "I wouldn't be surprised if they managed to managed to make the final room have a floor of lava."

The heroes all glanced at each other, nervously.

"Naaaah…" they said, dismissing the idea.

"Oh, look, Rosetta's up the ramp!" Glisa said excitedly.

And indeed she was.

Rosetta smiled triumphantly, but then seemed to realize the anti-climatic-ness of the situation. She looked straight at the in-universe camera, only to then break the out-universe barrier. "…what? Did you seriously want to read a narration of me going up a ramp?"

"And would you look at that, I'm all out of barrels," Lacey observed.

The two girls awkwardly stood there for a moment.

"Yeah…" Rosetta said.

"So…" Lacey coughed. "I should go now?"

"Probably," Rosetta agreed.

Riley spoke up to the two: "Is any of this supposed to get dramatic soon? At all?"

"Oh, with all the angst going on last chapter, we might as well have a break," Jess commented.

"Good enough for me," Riley mused, with a shrug. "Shall we continue?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"…_so your attempt was_…?" the voice over the phone asked.

"Hopelessly unsuccessful," Lacey admitted. She shrugged. "But hey, you win some, you lose some, you throw some barrels…"

"_Ugh. I was hoping that nobody would have to see me in this. Thanks a lot, Lacey_."

"Hey, that's what I'm here for," Lacey deadpanned. "Anyways, Chef isn't much better off than you, is he?"

"_Yeah, but I think he actually likes the costume_."

"And I'm sure your matching one is just as adorable."

"_Ohmygawdshutup_," Sienna growled, pushing the phrase into one word. "_Why didn't you have to wear, like, a monkey costume or something_?"

"Because…I'm allergic to…um…" Lacey cleared her throat. "Oh, hey! Going through a tunnel!"

"_YOU'RE NOT EVEN IN A __**CAR**_!"

Lacey laughed. "Sorry, Sienna. Besides, I'm sure it'll be fine. You guys will stop the heroes and we'll win in no time."

_"Hmmph. You better hope so. Oh look, they're here now."_

"Good luck!" Lacey said.

_"Yeah, yeah." _Lacey could tell Sienna was smirking. _"Later."_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"ARE YOU TALKING ON YOUR CELL PHONE IN A TIME OF WAR, SOLDIER?" Chef barked, making Sienna jump several feet.

"Uh…uh…" Sienna quickly shoved her phone back into her purse. "No, sir, no way! But, _hey_, look, _heroes_! You might want to focus your attention on _them_ now!"

"Okay," Riley sighed, as the heroes made their way into the room. "Who called it? I totally called it."

There was one thin strip of concrete that went from the door the heroes had entered in, to the door that Sienna and Chef stood in front of. To the left and right of the path? Lava. Sienna wore a yellow skirt, yellow leggings, a yellow halter, a handkerchief with a picture of a mouth with very sharp teeth, two metal bracelets, and something on her back that made it look like she had a spiky shell.

Chef wore a similar outfit that thankfully replaced the skirt with pants.

"Heh-heh," Riley chortled. "Bower Jr. and Bowser. Nice. So, the objective must be to get past you guys and get to the axe on the other side, eh?"

"And there ain't nothin' you can do to get past us!" Chef agreed, cracking his knuckles.

"And by us, we mean him," Sienna added, half-heartedly. "And when I say I've got your back, I really mean…I'll be over here." She innocently hid behind Chef.

Long whispered something to Riley that neither Chef, Sienna, nor the heroes could hear. Riley raised an eyebrow, and Long whispered something else. Riley nodded. Long walked away.

"So, any ideas, guys?" Riley asked the heroes.

"Schnitzel…" Aaron slurred, tiredly.

"Uh, I hate to be the cynical one, here," Rosetta observed, "but I think our chances of getting past Chef are…slim to none."

"True, true," Riley agreed. She turned to Chef. "It's a true travesty that we'd be stopped…even before we reached the seventh level. It's a shame that you beat us…by putting Chef in to block our only path to our next door. It's a true indignity…that I forgot my phone so I cannot take a picture of the outfits you are in."

"There's a reason she's talking so much, isn't there," Jess guessed.

"I would agree," Glisa mused.

"But the BIGGEST ignominy—" Riley continued, dramatically.

"She really broke out the thesaurus for this one," Rosetta observed.

"Is that…" Riley continued. "You used…RED JELL-O to create FAKE LAVA."

"What," Jess said, flatly.

"Huh?" Glisa added, bewildered.

"Shoot!" Sienna shouted, just as she turned around to hear Long lift up the axe and shout—

"_Got it_!"

The bridge crumbled underneath Chef and Sienna's feet and the two fell into the Jell-o below.

The heroes cheered, except for Jess, who sighed:

"Guys? You do realize that we're stuck on the other side of the room with no bridge, right?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zarya chuckled a bit as she watched the irritated heroes swim across the pool of Jell-o to reach the other side.

"They're getting closer," she said. "Maybe you really _will_ get saved by your rescuers."

"Maybe," Seth agreed, as he continued silently undoing the knots in the rope that tied his wrists together.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"I'm kinda nervous," Riley admitted, before they opened the seventh door, "if they broke out Chef for the sixth level…I can't imagine how difficult seven and eight must be."

"There's been one villain for each level, right?" Rosetta commented. "We only have Zarya and Lola left."

"Ew," Damion said, frowning. "To the latter, not the former, that is."

"I don't know which is in this level," Rosetta continued, "but hey, we've made it this far. Can't stop now, right?"

They pushed opened the door and stepped inside.

The room was dark and eerie. It looked like the inside of some dungeon.

"On second thought," Rosetta said, slowly. "Why quit while you're ahead?" Regardless, the heroes moved on, towards the door, terrified of what the challenge for this room might be. Suddenly, the lights went off completely.

_"Are you ready…"_ whispered a voice, darkly. _"For the terrifying…absolutely horrible…mind-destroying…" _the heroes shivered, and then grew blank expressions when the voice finished with this, in a suddenly peppy voice: _"64__th__ annual Wawanakwa Quiz Games!"_

The lights turned back on. Suddenly the room had been transformed into a quiz-show set up. There were flashing, colorful lights, and the heroes were now suddenly standing in front of a booth. Across the room was another booth, labeled 'host'. Cheery theme music had appeared out of nowhere.

"Again," Jess said, flatly. "What."

Lola strode into the room in a red, strapless dress, and high-heels.

"Indeed, ladies and gentlemen," she continued, having been the voice from earlier. "It's time for your favorite part of the show!"

Damion whipped his head around. "Who on Earth are you talking to?"

"I'll be your host," Lola continued, taking her place at the booth, "and you'll be playing for some faaaabulous prizes! Including…your passage to the eight level! All you need to do," she said, now looking at the heroes. "Is answer five…simple…questions."

"Question number one…who was the first damsel in distress Mario rescued?"

"Pauline," Riley answered, after buzzing in. The other heroes glanced at each other and smirked, already sure that they had this in a bag. And for a while, it seemed to be so. It just went back and forth between the ridiculously cheerful Lola and Riley, who seemed perfectly confident:

"Correct! Question two: what was the name of the machine Mario used in _Super Mario Sunshine_?"

"FLUDD."

"Correct! Question three: What's the name of the boss inside the volcano on Lavalava Island in _Paper Mario_?"

"Lava Piranha."

"Correct! Question four: what was Mario's original name?"

"Easy. Jumpman."

"Correct! Final question: what is Mario's…last name?"

"Mario's last name is Mario. Apparently. Can we go now?"

"Yes, that was correct," Lola agreed, and suddenly the heroes were feeling a little bit wary of the grin she was sporting, "but don't you want to stay for the bonus round?"

The heroes looked at each other, confused.

"Bonus round?" Glisa echoed.

"Yeah, I've got a whole new set of questions for it…" Lola continued. She filed through a new list of questions, and asked them, rapid fire.

"Question one: who is currently on the island, right now, that isn't supposed to be?" The heroes stared back at her, blankly, except for Riley and Jess, who paled a little bit. "No answer? The correct answer is: Mo and Riley F."

"Wait, what?" Jess looked up, surprised. "Mo's here too?"

"What do you mean, Mo's here too?" Rosetta snapped at her. "You knew Riley was here? Why wouldn't you tell me?"

"Question two," Lola continued, clearly enjoying herself. "Which heroes had a secret alliance earlier in the competition?" Riley grimaced and Lola answered the questions for the heroes. "Correct answer: Riley, Bren, and Seth! Now, who knew about the alliance but didn't tell the others?" She didn't even wait to give them the answer. "Correct answer: Damion. And how did Damion know about the alliance? Answer: from Mo! And for fun: who's had an alliance with Aaron? Answer…Damion!"

Immediately, the heroes burst into a flurry of arguments, and Lola just grinned as she innocently shuffled her deck of questions.

"Game over," she said. "Thanks for playing."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Zarya shook her head as she watched the heroes continued to fight with each other. "Looks like that's it for your rescue brigade, Seth."

"Yeah, about that…" Seth said, but Zarya jumped when she realized that Seth was right behind her. Seth smiled and dropped the untied rope from his hands. "I kinda thought I'd take things into my own hands. And I'm really, really sorry about this, by the way." He quickly pinched a nerve on Zarya's shoulder that made her go unconscious. Seth caught her before she hit the ground and gently laid her down.

"Yeah, Seth," Seth muttered to himself, still annoyed with the dress, as he opened the door. "You go, girl. Making a stand for damsels in distress everywhere."

()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes were still shouting at each other, and Lola was making innocent little comments to spur their anger even further. This continued for a long while, until Seth walked through the doors about as triumphantly as he could when he was wearing a pink dress. Everybody seemed to busy to even notice him. Seth listened in to the fighting for a moment, then scowled, and shouted:

"Guys!"

The heroes turned to look at him.

"We've got bigger problems to worry about," Seth told his team. "One of them being the fact that I am currently in a _dress_. We need to win this challenge, so let's get going, and we can worry about all that other crap later!"

The heroes certainly didn't seem amiable as they did it, but they indeed began heading out of the building.

"Well, if it's any consolation," Aaron (who had finally come back to his senses) said to Seth. "The dress is rather slimming!"

A vein pulsed in Seth's forehead, but he just sighed, dismissing the whole thing. "Yeah. Thanks, Aaron."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Chris was waiting for the heroes as they exited the building. The heroes seemed excited for Chris to announce their win, but the host just shook his head and smirked.

"CONFOUND IT ALL!" Jess shouted, dropping down to her knees. "Can't you have us have one shred of happiness, man?"

"Sorry, heroes," Chris told them, not looking very sorry at all. "But I said that the challenge was for the heroes to rescue Seth. And Seth rescued _himself_."

"That's your big loophole?" Rosetta shouted. "That's a load of bull-crap!"

"Them's the rules," Chris replied, with an innocent shrug. "See you angst-ridden teens at the elimination ceremony…_tonight_!"

"Wait!" Jess shouted. "Chris! Riley F. and Mo are still on the island!"

"Well, duh," Chris said, smiling evilly.

"Wait…you knew that already?" Glisa asked him.

"Of course," Chris replied. He laughed as he walked away from the heroes. "I figured that out quite a while ago. Where you do you think Lola got her scoop?" The heroes glared at him as he left.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"All right…" Rosetta muttered, stalking through the forest. She cupped her hands over her mouth. "Riley, I know you're out here! Get out here!"

"When you're looking like you're gonna kill me, armed with nothing but a stick? I think I'll stay up here for a while, thanks."

Scowling, Rosetta looked up. Riley F. was sitting on a branch high up ahead of her. Riley smiled, awkwardly.

"Hey," he said, with a weak little wave.

"I'm not a bear," Rosetta pointed out, dully. "I can climb up there, just as easily as you can."

Riley shrugged. "It was worth a shot." Rosetta, with an aggravated sigh, climbed up the tree and sat next to Riley. The two of them were silent for a while.

"Why'd you come back, Riley?" Rosetta asked, finally.

Riley looked down at the ground. "I couldn't take it anymore."

Rosetta raised an eyebrow. "Take what anymore?"

"Knowing that the last thing you were ever gonna know me as was a jerk who broke up with you even though he was so _idiotically_ wrong."

"Riley, you can't fix what you did," Rosetta snapped. "You seriously screwed up."

Riley nodded. "I know." He closed his eyes, and shook his head. "I know...I apologized to Bren. Multiple times. I believe there was a musical number involved." Rosetta raised an eyebrow. "Craaaazy stuff over there in the Playa des Losers. _Anywho_, I missed you. I miss when you were the no-nonsense teammate yelling at me for screwing up, and I was the smart-ass trying to woo you over."

"This show seems to have a way with screwing everything up," Rosetta observed, dryly.

"Yeah, that would be Chris's art," Riley agreed. "He'd get the Teletubbies throwing punches at each other in no time at all."

"But dude," Rosetta sighed. "You can't blame this all on the show. You made a stupid choice, and you actually hurt someone because of it. And not just Bren, I mean, you really hurt me too. And you can't make everything okay in a nice thirty-minute segment. It's not that easy."

"Well, then," Riley said, with a small smile. He held out his hand. "What if I told you I'd be willing to do anything to get your trust back?"

Rosetta raised an eyebrow, but smiled back, just a little bit.

She took Riley's hand.

"It's a start," she said.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes gathered around the campfire to await their results, many of them glaring at each other, suspiciously.

"Greetings!" Chris chuckled, walking towards the light of the fire. "And welcome to…someone's imminent doom. Let's get this show on the road—by the way, all of the ex-campers are off the island, now." Damion widened his eyes in surprise. "At least…I'm pretty sure." Damion soon after rolled his eyes, and Chris continued: "The safe campers today are…Glisa, Jess, Aaron, Damion, Riley, and Long."

Rosetta and Seth glanced at each other, briefly, before glancing back at Chris.

"Seth and Rosetta…the final marshmallow goes to…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…Seth."

Seth caught it, relieved, and Rosetta just smiled and stood up.

"It's cool," she said, breezily. She turned around to the other heroes. "And, you guys? Keep this in mind." She grinned. "The more you actually get along, the more pissed off Chris will get." She turned around and waved all her shoulder. "Good luck, guys…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"I can't believe it," Seth sighed, leaning over the railing. Riley stood next to him, leaving over it as well. "I can't believe Lola just blabbed all those secrets like that…and I can't believe I almost lost the challenge for us today!"

Riley smiled. "Oh, I don't know…" she said. "I thought the way you did it was pretty cool." She kissed Seth on the cheek, making the karate kid blush bright red. "See you tomorrow, Seth," she said, as she retreated back to her cabin.

Seth just replied something like: "Ugh gah guh…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

(**Confession Cam: Rosetta's final words)**

** Rosetta—**_(She just smiles.) _"Not a bad go, I'd say. Later, Wawanakwa, see you never."

()()()()()()()()()()

**Elsewhere:**

"Everything prepped?"

"Y-y-yeah. The sleigh is all ready to go."

"MAGNIFICENT! We shall go to Wawanakwa at dusk!"

"But we have about another two weeks b-before the next challenge…"

"THEN WE SHALL GO IN A FORTNIGHT!"

"But, um, that's not what the word 'fortnight'—"

"Just let it go, dude," Lou suggested, smirking at Harper. Harper shrugged, feebly.

"All right," he said. "Um, anything else you need, Hazel?"

"Yes! Go and buy me a root-beer!"

"…what? A root-beer? We live in some unspecified island in the middle of nowhere!"

"Irrelevant!" Hazel boomed in response. "Leave at once!" Harper sighed and did as he was told. Hazel grinned as she turned to her fellow pirates as she hopped on top of the enormous sled they had constructed. "Ladies…and Harper…I am proud to say that…we shall make this the best Christmas Wawanakwa's never had!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

** (A.N.) **And so you have it! This was an odd chapter! I left some ends open but that's just how I roll. And yes, the ending made it pretty obvious what next chapter's theme is, and ideally, the chapter would be out before Christmas, but that would probably take a miracle.

A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE, perhaps…?

Anyways, thanks to Sonowa for giving me the "grab-the-axe" sub-challenge. That's all. Thanks for reading and please review if you get the chance!

**Eliminated list: **Laura, Demi, Isaac, Riley F, Mo, Kit-Kat, Bren, Jack, Rosetta


	14. A Very Wawanakwa Christmas

** (A.N.) **If you want to point out that my "Christmas special" is, in fact, not on Christmas, nor is it even in December…I probably deserve it.

This chapter's brought to you by: my Valentine's Day challenge, which should come out somewhere in the middle of _April_.

Enjoy the update!

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Last time, on Total Drama Island: Heroes Versus Villains…"

Chris said this normal opening line at his normal spot on the Dock of Shame, but there were a few notable differences in Wawanakwa's appearance that made the whole recap seem, well…abnormal.

The summer camp was no longer summery. The green grass had been coated with thick, white snow, and from the looks of it the snow was quite deep as well. The blue sky was now a calm gray. Wawanakwa Lake was not frozen, but the dock seemed to be slick with ice. Chris was having a bit of trouble completely keeping his balance, but regardless, he continued his recap of last episode's events.

"Seth was captured and held in the ancient castle of…something. Yeah, we didn't name it. Anyways, Seth was in a dress.

"So! Our dashing heroes set off to rescue Seth, and were met with level after level of Mario-related madness. One villain was in each level, and our heroes pushed their way past the horrors of cages, reggae music, barrels, fake lava, and…Arlen.

"In the end it was Lola who stopped the heroes by spilling all their secrets and causing some major fights to erupt. Seth got tired of waiting for his hapless helpers, and ended up rescuing himself. Unfortunately, this went against the rules I set for the challenge, and the heroes ended up losing!

"So, Rosetta ended up going home, but she managed to reconcile with her ex-boyfriend. Yeah, let's see how long _that_ lasts.

"Anyways, you might've noticed, we've had a bit of a weather change in Wawanakwa! The cast should be in for quite a surprise when they—"

Chris was cut off by the sound of sleigh bells. He whipped his head around, and the camera turned to follow his gaze. Coming in towards Camp Wawanakwa (and coming in _fast_) was a flying sleigh that appeared to have flames shooting out of its end.

"HEAR YE, HEAR YE!" A voice boomed, coming from the sleigh. "THE _PIRATES_ ARE COMING TO TOWN!"

"The…pirates?" Chris repeated. His eye was twitching slightly. "We—didn't—invite them _back_…" He turned to the camera with a nervous laugh, and started to speak very quickly. "Yeah, so, stick in to see who gets eliminated on the most exciting exciting elimination of all time—CHEF! CHEF, WE HAVE A MAJOR PROBLEM HERE!"

He ran off. The cameramen glanced at each other, awkwardly, and flipped to the theme song.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Isn't this a _summer_ camp?"

Zane's question went unanswered, so the loner just stared up at the falling flakes, dismally.

"Well, at least we know the challenge isn't to see who the last person to get hypothermia is," Riley quipped, as she adjusted her lime green scarf. Somehow, a new set of winter apparel had magically appeared in the campers' drawers. The campers didn't bother to question how.

All of the contestants were outside of their cabins, wandering around in the snow.

"Dis is amazing!" Glisa said excitedly. "Ah, I never get de chance to play with snow…this will be very _divertido!_" She scooped up a handful of snow and threw it at an unsuspecting Seth. Seth turned around, chuckled evilly, and in moments, war was declared.

"Girls against boys!" Lacey announced, as she began to make a few snowballs.

"Aw, guess I won't be able to protect you then, sweetheart," Logan said, grinning at Sienna. Sienna pouted playfully, and took a few steps towards Logan.

"A shame, too, because I'm in such danger in a _snowball_ fight," Sienna said.

"Well, I'm just saying, I'm not the kind of person you want to be against," Logan replied, with a smirk.

"And I'm just saying that anything you want to throw at me I'll throw back tenfold," Sienna said coolly.

"Is that a threat?"

"Or an invitation, depending on your interpretation."

"Nice rhyme," Logan commented. He opened his mouth to say something else flirty, but then he suddenly felt the urge to slap his forehead. "You have a snowball behind your back right now," he surmised.

Sienna grinned. "Bingo."

And she whipped out that snowball so hard that somehow it sent Logan flying back several feet. Zane, who was watching the whole scene with mild interest, raised an eyebrow.

**(Confession Cam: Oh, it could be worse)**

** Zane—**"I blame…cartoon physics?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oy, Zane!" Riley popped up the loner. "Gonna join in? I promise I'll lay off of you! For a while, at least. For now I'm mostly interested on defeating Seth. If I may be so forward with my puns, I'd say he has a snowball's chance in hell of winning this fight!" She grinned, widely.

"Ah, I'll have to pass," Zane replied, half-heartedly. "It seems I've left my mittens in the cabin."

"Oh, then grab them and head back here!" Riley urged.

Zane sighed. "I wasn't being _serious_."

"Ah," Riley said, and she looked a tad annoyed. "Sorry, I had my sarcasm detector turned off. I forgot that everything that you say has to be a cynical one-liner, eh?"

Zane blinked a few times, obviously surprised at her comments. Riley just shrugged and walked away.

"Whatever. Have fun with your books, Zane."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The snowball fight had ended with some extremely cold and wet campers. They began to move towards the mess hall, where they hoped the fireplace would be on and they could warm up.

"And, of course, it's not on," Lola complained as she walked through the doors. "I'm sure Chris is sitting in his heated beach house right now."

"Hey, nobody made you join the snowball fight," Arlen pointed out innocently.

"I _didn't_ join the snowball fight!" Lola shouted back in indignation, sending a flurry of hits towards his way. "You threw a snowball the size of a _Buick_ at me!" Arlen just laughed and danced out of the way of Lola's angry blows. The villains and heroes took their spots at their tables. Red-faced and grinning, they continued talking excitedly about the snow and the challenge at hand.

Chef wasn't there to give them breakfast, but nobody really thought that this was something to complain about, anyways.

Chelsea leaned towards the heroes table. "Hey, aren't you guys supposed to be pissed off at each other?" The heroes glanced at each other, recalling all of the secrets that Lola had spilled in the previous challenge. However, Aaron just grinned triumphantly.

"Ha, that's what you villains might _want_…but we aren't going to fight," he declared.

Riley raised an eyebrow. "We're not?"

"No!" Aaron replied. "Because…that would make Lola and Chris and maybe some of the other villains happy! And as pissed off as we may be at each other…we'd rather be disappointing _you_ guys!"

The heroes all stared at Aaron for a long moment. Then, Jess shrugged.

"Works for me," she said.

And that was that.

**(Confession Cam: It's been so long; we can't think of any one-liners!)**

** Damion—**"So…we heroes are united…in our hatred for Lola and Chris?" _(He scratches his head.) _"I don't think that's a very family-friendly message."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes and villains all looked to the doors as they heard someone coming through the doors. They were surprised to see that it was Chef, rather than Chris.

"Chris is busy doin' the recap," Chef said, gruffly, before any of them asked.

"Can we get some breakfast?" Logan asked, bluntly.

"Where'd this snow come from?" Glisa questioned dizzily. "Does anyone know what da actual date is?"

"Ooh, is today the Christmas special?" Sienna asked, lighting up.

"Will y'all shut up with ya damn questions!" Chef growled. "Breakfast—in a second. Yes, it's the Christmas special. And nobody knows the real date. Ya happy?"

"_Thrilled_," deadpanned Zarya.

"Nobody knows the real date?" Seth echoed, with a slightly worried tone. "Jeez, how long have we been here?"

**(Confession Cam: Are we talking real-world time, or…?)**

** Lacey—**_(With a sarcastically dramatic flourish), _"The world may _never know_…"

()()()()()()()()()()

"Aw, and no Christmas decorations?" Damion mused, looking around at the plain mess hall. "We had cobwebs and rats and spiders for Halloween, though…"

Jess, elbowing him, grinned. "See, Damion, none of those were actually _decorations_…" Damion smirked.

**(Confession Cam: Someone hang a candy-cane on us! We want to be festive!)**

**Long—**"I would laugh…but I'm pretty sure that Jess is actually right about that…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"I'm kind of excited for the challenge now, though," Riley said to Seth, as everybody started to dig into the food Chef was passing out. "A Christmas challenge! There's no way that Chris could make this totally un-fun or painful or horrible…right? I mean, it's the Christmas special. C'mon."

Seth shrugged, and grinned. "I've got my hopes up, but I still don't feel that confident putting my faith in Chris…who knows? Maybe his horribly shrunken heart will grow three times in size today…"

"That'll be a story to tell," Riley commented. Seth smiled, and seemed a little nervous about something. Riley noticed this and asked him, "You okay?"

"Oh…um…yeah!" Seth stammered. "I was just…um…"

Aaron, always happy to help, chimed in: "Reliving the emotional trauma of having spent several hours in a poofy pink fairy dress?"

Seth shot him an angry look but only for a split second. Clearing his throat, he awkwardly agreed. "Um…yeah. That."

**(Confession Cam: Is it too late for us to say that it was rather slimming?)**

** Riley—**"Okay, seriously. I mean _seriously_. I kissed the dude, and he still doesn't have the guts to—" _(Seething, she kicks the side of the Confession Cam.) _"Darn it! What do I have to do? Compose a few limericks? Get some gigantic fireworks? Get a megaphone and shout it into his ear? I'm all for dramatic tension, but—ARGH!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hey, out of curiosity, what was _your_ plan?" Lacey asked Zarya. "Your plan to stop the heroes from saving Seth, I mean. You were the last floor, so you must've had something big in there, right?"

Zarya shook her head. "Just a table…a TV…some bad lighting…and a chair."

"Well, what were you gonna do?" Sienna questioned, impatiently. "Throw the TV at them?"

Zarya just shrugged, innocently, while Zane just attempted to hide his smile.

**(Confession Cam: The less you know…)**

** Zane—**"Let's just say that all hell would've broken loose and there would've been some very dramatic Latin gibberish being chanted in the background."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Um…" Glisa looked up, and then towards the doors of the mess hall. "Does someone hear screaming?"

"Screaming?" Jess repeated, alarmed. "Dude, is someone hurt?" The heroes (being the heroic sort that they were) quickly stood up to go out the doors, but then suddenly they realized exactly where the screaming was coming from.

"_Qué es ésto_?" Glisa gasped, pointing in the distance. Something big and brown was flying straight at the mess hall. Chris burst through the mess hall doors just as Chef ran through the kitchen doors.

"It's the pirates!" Chris wailed.

"Why'd you invite them back?" Lola asked shrilly.

"We _didn't_!" Chris shouted.

There was a long pause, and everybody ran around, screaming.

"WE'RE DOOMED!" (This came from Sienna.)

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" (This came from Aaron.)

"I WANT MY MOMMY!" (This came from Chef.)

"Guys!" Seth shouted, thankfully being the voice of reason. "Since they're heading towards the mess hall, shouldn't we get _out of here_?"

"I suppose…that makes…sense…" Chelsea agreed, slowly. The lot of them quickly shuffled out, and watched as the pirates' sleigh skidded on top of the mess hall roof. It remained stationary on the roof for a moment, and everybody sighed in relief, which then cued the inevitable—the sleigh crashed through the roof.

Chef was in such a fury that he couldn't quite form a coherent sentence. Chris and the rest of the campers were left gaping at the cabin, uncertain what else to say. A few seconds passed by, and soon the pirate captain Hazel emerged from the mess hall doors. Her tan skin was covered in ash and dust, and she wore a Santa cap on top of her dark hair.

"Whoo!" She exhaled. "I'd give that landing a straight-up _ten_!"

"You crashed through the mess hall roof!" Riley shouted, gesturing towards the gaping hole in the roof. "How is that a ten?"

Sienna shrugged. "Maybe that's what they were aiming to do?"

"Personally," Lacey commented, dryly, "I'd go for the explanation that they're all just _completely insane_."

"Aren't we all…?" Zarya murmured, under her breath.

Harper, the curly-haired brunet, was the next to poke his head out of the door.

"That's what you get for driving something without letting me tell you what the controls are…" he was muttering, lowly. He looked up, nervously, and seemed to realize that most of the looks the pirates were getting were a tad unfriendly. "Um…hi everyone."

Next came Paige, AKA Beeper. She looked like she was emerging from a party rather than a sleigh wreck. "Heeeey everybody! Oh my gosh, it's so awesome to be back! I thought we'd be gone for good, but then Hazel was like, 'why not show up again'? And we were all like 'okay!'."

"Huh," Long mused to himself, suddenly wishing he had Kit-Kat to talk to. "Someone came to Wawanakwa _willingly_…"

Lou, the dark-skinned red-head, emerged without a word and calmly went to Hazel's side.

"Not to be blunt, but ah…" Chelsea scratched her head. "Why are you guys here?"

"Why are we here?" Hazel echoed, over-dramatic as always. "Why…we are here to spread the Christmas cheer! We have a challenge planned and everything!"

"We already have a challenge," Chris grumbled, arms crossed. "So you can kindly take your sleigh and go back to Crazy Land."

"Crazy Land is already populated by my sister, Macadamia," Hazel told Chris, in a very _duh_ sort of tone. Lacey and Sienna exchanged blank looks. "In any case, our sleigh is a little worse for the wear!"

"And by a little, you mean…" Seth prompted, half-heartedly.

"Meaning," Harper sighed, "that the only way we're using that sleigh to get anywhere is if we push it in the lake and row our way home."

"But you guys are not allowed to be here!" Chris said, defiantly. "Normally I wouldn't care, but you're busting up the camp site, dude!"

"And you care about _that_?" Jess questioned, looking at the host speculatively.

"Unfortunately, there will be some legal issues if your cabins end up on fire or stuff like that," Chris sighed. "If the pirates stick around, it's pretty much guaranteed that something's gonna blow up."

Beeper opened her mouth to argue, but then shrugged. "Yeah, that's true." She clapped her hands together, excitedly, and added: "Hey, so we may not have your permission to be here, but you know what we do have?"

The campers exchanged looks.

Beeper grinned. "_Cookies_." She ducked into the mess hall, and was gone for a few moments, until she reemerged holding big white boxes.

The campers grinned.

"Oh, they're good…" Chris muttered, after the cookies had been handed out.

"The cookies or the pirates?" Glisa asked.

Unsure, Chris took a bite of the snicker-doodle he was holding. He swallowed it, and then answered, sullenly: "Both…"

**(Confession Cam: When all else fails…)**

** Arlen—**_(Munching on a snicker-doodle). _"Hey, I always said those pirates were A-OK in my books."

**Zane—**"So, apparently now the pirates are doing our challenge, and Harper's gonna try and fix up the sleigh. Do to the fact that the last 'pirate' challenge was just about the worst challenge day of my TDI-life…" _(He is super-duper sarcastic.) _"Yeah. Good feelings about this. Christmas cheer for one-and-all." _(Sighs.) _"And what's with Riley? Did she really expect me to join that stupid snowball fight?" _(He shakes his head.) _"Maybe elementary boys have it figured out best…girls are weird."

**Aaron—**_(Brightly)_, "Snicker-doodle is such a fun word! Snicker-doodle, snicker-doodle, snicker-doodle…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So, what's the challenge, then?" Logan asked the pirates.

"We were just getting to that, weren't we Harper?" Hazel responded, cheerfully. Apparently this was supposed to be a cue, but Harper just kept staring off into space. Hazel cleared her throat, and said, a little angrier this time: "Weren't we, _HARPER_?" Harper jumped and instantly scrambled for a backpack he had set down.

"S-s-sorry…" he mumbled. He fished out a folder and pulled out a piece of paper.

"Now this _looks_ like an ordinary piece of paper…" Hazel began, mysteriously.

Harper looked puzzled. "Um, it _is_ an ordinary piece of paper."

Hazel glared at him. "They weren't supposed to know that!"

**(Confession Cam: Now, we may **_**look**_** like an ordinary one-liner…)**

** Seth—**"I really have to wonder about the pirates' back-story. How did a sane guy like Harper end up with three of the craziest people in the world?"

**Riley—**"I wonder how their parents knew Hazel and her sister—I guess, if she really does have a sister—were destined to be crazy. I mean, otherwise, what'd be the point of the pun? Hazel and Macadamia…because they're both _nuts_, right?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Anyways, this paper holds all of the secrets of your future challenge!" Hazel announced, cheerful once again. "So…Harper's gonna tell you all about it!"

Harper sighed. "Aw, I hate public speaking…" but he cleared his throat and continued, speaking louder for the campers. "Okay, here's what's gonna happen! Today's challenge is a multi-part challenge. The first part involves rescuing a giant sleigh filled with presents from falling off of a cliff. There's a hero sleigh and a villain sleigh. You need to bring the sleigh back down, with all of the presents still in there."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a sec," Arlen interrupted. "How the heck do you guys have two sleds _already_ up there?"

The pirates exchanged glances; it seemed they did not know the answer either.

"Um…" Beeper clapped her hands together. "Christmas _magic_. Now scoot your butts over to the Thousand Foot Cliff before all of the presents fall off!"

"And _you_," Hazel added, pointing towards Logan quite dramatically.

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

"_Do not take the wrong sleigh this time_. They are labeled 'hero' and 'villain' so don't touch the heroes sleigh. Or I will put you in a _world of pain_," she added, furiously, as she took out her plastic sword and brandished it threateningly. Logan was about to say that he wasn't afraid of a stupid plastic sword, but Hazel held it with such conviction that he just rolled his eyes and walked away with the villains.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Okay, I take it back," Arlen groaned, as he and his fellow villains trudged up the Thousand-Foot Cliff. "I hate those stupid pirates."

"Aw, suck it up and be a man," Chelsea grumbled, plodding her way beside him.

"Ugh…" Sienna sighed, with a little grimace. "This is a little trickier with the snow." Almost a split second after that, she slipped and began to fall backwards. She let out a small shriek, but Logan caught her before she could start tumbling.

"I got'cha," Logan said, with a grin.

"Thanks," Sienna muttered, before Logan helped her completely get back on her feet.

"Are you blushing?" Logan asked her.

"No!" Sienna answered, a bit too quickly. "It's just the cold!"

"Are you _suuuure_?" Logan asked Sienna, mischievously.

"You are such a moron!" Sienna complained. She was grinning too. Meanwhile, Lacey couldn't help but overhear Zane muttering something long and complicated-sounding under his breath. She turned her head towards him, and before she could ask, Zane hastily said—

"Just trying to figure something out. Sorry, I'll stop muttering."

Lacey shrugged. "Alright."

The heroes weren't very far behind at all. Both the heroes and the villains figured that they should've been treating this as a race, but it was such a long and unpleasant climb that they figured they'd save the hastiness for later.

Long was staring up in the distance, where the two giant sleds were looming. There was a bag in them that was filled to the brim with presents. In fact, they seemed to be overflowing just a little bit.

"I see a problem…" Long murmured, but nobody seemed to hear him.

Eventually, the heroes and the villains reached the top. Both sleds were teetering precariously over the edge of the cliff. Immediately, the members of each team began to seize parts of their sleigh and drag it backwards (one sled had 'hero' on the back, the other had 'villain').

The villains sled jerked forwards for a second, and two of their presents toppled over the sled and began to fall off the cliff.

"Oh crap!" Lacey shouted. She jumped forwards, landed on her stomach, and grabbed the presents by their ribbons before they fell too far down. She breathed a sigh of relief and eased her way back up, throwing the presents back into the sled.

"And now," Zane muttered, looking back down at the minuscule campsite. "There's the problem of getting down."

"Oh yeah…" Chelsea agreed, slowly. The villains had somehow all squeezed in onto the seat. "Well…" she pondered. "What do we do now?"

There was no point in answering. The villains realized, a second too late, that the sled was already sliding down the hill. Holding onto each other and screaming, they began their long and fast descent down the hill.

"I'd rather not do that, if that's alright…" Damion commented, looking over the sled to see the villains disappearing into the distance.

"Unfortunately, I can't see another way of even _possibly_ getting there before the villains…" Aaron mused. He was standing in front of the sleigh, and grinning.

"Oh, wait a second," Seth stammered, but Aaron had already innocently kicked the front of the sled, sending the heroes' sled inching down the slope…and soon they were zooming down as well, screaming all the way.

Near the end of the Thousand-Foot Cliff, the heroes hit a huge rock, sending their sleigh flying up in the air—and all of them flying out of it. They fell ahead of the villains and landed right in front of the pirates themselves. Their sack of presents landed, unscathed, right in front of them.

Jess—who had been buried underneath the snow—popped her head out. "I am going to _kill_ Aaron," she growled.

"You guys won the challenge!" Beeper informed them, smiling widely.

"I am going to kill him and give him a hug," Jess corrected herself.

"I am not sure dat is much of an improvement," Glisa commented. She looked around, curiously. "Where'd our sled go?" A moment later, the sled flew through the air and crashed into the mess hall, leaving an identical hole next to the one the pirates made.

"Found it," Long said. A few seconds later, the villains' sled slowed to a stop a few yards ahead of the pile of heroes.

"Wait, you guys beat us here?" Lola questioned in disbelief.

"If I remembered anything about physics," Lacey commented, "I would say that this just violated a rule of some sort."

"Well _that's_ convincing," Sienna remarked, giving Lacey a smirk.

"How many more mini-challenges do we have?" Chelsea asked, turning to the pirates. "We still have a chance to win, don't we?"

Hazel nodded. "Yup! The heroes may have one the first challenge but there are two more challenges left. For the second challenge, we're gonna need you to go to the mess hall. Harper made hot cocoa!"

Harper looked as confused as ever. "…no I didn't."

Hazel hit him on the head. "Well what are you waiting for? Go make these nice people some hot cocoa!" Harper, with one annoyed look to Hazel, ran off.

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Aw, what the hell…" Chef complained, looking up at the second gaping hole in the roof.

"Sorry about that!" Beeper said brightly. "Hey, can we use your kitchen?" Chef turned a strange hue of purple.

"NO YOU CAN'T USE MY DAMN KI—"

"Thank you kind sir!" Hazel said, oblivious, as she and the other three pirates moved into the kitchen. The heroes and the villains all took their places at the tables, trying their best not to laugh.

"I hate those guys," Chef muttered.

"Join the club," Arlen replied, smirking.

A little bit later, the pirates reemerged, bearing cups of hot cocoa that they distributed. As the campers sipped and tried to stay warm (a lot of cold air was getting in the mess hall, _somehow_) the pirates started to explain the next part of the challenge.

"Guess where you guys are going?" Beeper sang, clearly excited about something.

"Home?" Zarya mumbled, in a tone that was somewhat hopeful.

"How about just 'anywhere but here'?" Jess suggested.

Hazel just shook her head at Beeper. "Hey, no vague foreshadowing, okay? Anyways, here's the next part of the challenge. You guys need to deliver those presents to a certain location, but we only give you a few clues as to where that location is."

"_Rhyming_ clues!" Beeper added, rather enthusiastically. Harper put a sheet of paper down on each table.

"We'll meet you at this secret location," Hazel added. "So…"

"_Espera_," Glisa called out, quickly. "Is dere one location or two?"

"Um…" Harper paused. "You'll…find out!" And with that, the pirates ran out.

"C'mon, let's head," Logan ordered the villains, as he hauled the bag of presents over his shoulder. "Okay, loner one and loner two—"

"I assume you're talking about us," Zane, who was sitting next to Zarya, deadpanned. Logan nodded.

"You two take the clue and start reading over it."

Zarya raised an eyebrow. "Why us?"

Logan rolled his eyes. "'Cause you're the smart ones. Duh."

**(Confession Cam: The joys of stereotypes!)**

** Zane—**_(Chuckles a little bit.) _"Well, it's good to finally be recognized for it." _(Some angry thumping from outside the C.C. makes him jump.)_

_ (Off-screen), _**Chelsea—**"How many times are you gonna be in that stupid thing today, Zane?"

**Zane—**"Ahh…" _(Nervously turns the camera off.)_

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The heroes decided to stick around in the mess hall and read their clue there. Riley held it, squinted at the bad penmanship, and began to read:

"Alright, here's what it says…

"_A site used in challenges twice,_

_ Is now all covered in ice,_

_ The opposite, though, can be said,_

_ Might bring an onset of dread,_

_ For if memory serves, I recall,_

_ The opposite brought your downfall!_"

Riley folded the note, but the heroes frowned. "That's it," Riley admitted.

"Well, I can't speak for there rhyming skills," Jess chuckled, "but what do you guys make of the clues?"

"The opposite brought your downfall…" Seth echoed. He seemed puzzled. "The opposite of what? I'm confused."

"What was dat line before dey mentioned opposites?" Glisa asked Riley. Riley reopened the paper and reread the line.

"_Is now all covered in ice_," she read.

"So…do they mean the opposite of ice, then?" Aaron questioned. "Which would be fire…?" A moment passed by in silence, before Long spoke up with his answer.

"In Hummingbird Hollow," Long finalized. "The kitchen caught on fire. It's a site used twice, because Seth and Kit-Kat went there once before, during the spy challenge."

"Well, guys…" Damion said, with a rather big grin on his face. "I guess we're going back to Hummingbird Hollow."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Read it out loud, one more time," Lacey prompted Zane, as the villains stopped walking near the campfire. Zane cleared his throat and did as Lacey told:

"_One of your kind has seen it two times,_

_ And if you'll excuse these inadequate rhymes,_

_ You'll find that what you're searching for,_

_ Is home of your team's hand-picked décor,_

_ In a place where danger is honestly rare,_

_ The only problem is how you're getting there,_

_ Take too long and this threat shall coincide:_

_ The heroes will have already stolen your ride!"_

"So, if we need a ride to somewhere, it's obviously not on Camp Wawanakwa," Sienna said.

"'One of your kind has seen it two times'…" Lola mused. "Is that referring to, like, us _villains_, or all of the _contestants_, or pretty much human beings in general?"

"I'm not sure," Lacey admitted. "But the décor thing…the only thing we've decorated would be our own cabins...and..." as the realization hit her, Zarya finished her sentence.

"The arcade from Hummingbird Hollow," she sighed.

"And, um, it seems that they were right about that threat of theirs…" Zane spoke up. The villains turned their heads; the heroes had already taken the Boat of Losers and were driving it away. Aaron, not too noble to gloat, stuck his tongue out at the villains, childishly.

"They're getting away!" Logan said furiously, playing the role of Captain Obvious. The villains all ran up to the dock. The boat really hadn't made much progress. It only moved about fifteen miles per hour, so it wasn't that impressive of a getaway, but the villains seeing the Boat of Losers _put-put-put_ slowly out of sight was still an incredibly irritating thing to have to watch. (And on that note, "_They're put-put-putting away!_" is a much less dramatic thing to shout.)

"Great, now how are we getting there?" Lola complained, as the boat finally began to disappear in the horizon.

"What about the speedboats?" Sienna suggested.

"Those are all the way on the other side of the island," Lacey pointed out. "We'd be way far behind by then."

"Swim there?" Arlen suggested.

"Stick a foot in that water," Chelsea deadpanned, "and tell me if you'd still like to try that idea out." Arlen crossed his arms and sighed.

"There are still several canoes out here," Zarya pointed out. She gestured to the beach where upside-down canoes were lined up.

"But it still wouldn't match the speed of the boat," said Zane, with an almost apologetic tone.

"Then there's Chris's Jet-Skis," Lacey added, "but I have no idea where he keeps them and I'm not sure where Chris _is_, either."

"Well then…" Sienna promptly sat down and scowled. "We're kinda screwed."

Lola huffed, indignantly. "Isn't there some sort of rule that whenever there are three challenges you _always_ have to use the tie-breaker?"

The villains all waited for a few seconds.

"Y'know," Arlen said, loudly, "this is the point where some other form of transportation conveniently shows up."

Another few seconds passed. Nothing happened.

"I guess we lost…" Lola said, slowly, not willing to believe it.

"Let's…let's go to the speedboats, how about," Lacey suggested, but her tone was weak. "We won't win, but we might as well see what'll happen next."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hm…" Glisa mused, as the heroes continued driving their boat along the waters.

"What's up, Glisa?" Jess asked her, curiously.

"I am feeling _un poco_ guilty…" she admitted. "We left de villains at Camp Wawanakwa with no way to get to Hummingbird Hollow."

"Oh, they have ways to get there," Jess replied, dismissively. "Just no way to get there before us."

"I suppose so, _pero_…" Glisa hesitated again.

"Aw, c'mon, Glisa!" Jess laughed. "The villains always get the upper-hand over us. They get the better advantages, Chris bends the rules for 'em…can't we have this one little victory? Hey, once we get there, we've already won the challenge!"

"Aw." Aaron frowned. "What a quick challenge."

"Well, maybe they'll have us still do the third part," Jess mused. "Heck, I don't know. But I know we're winning and…and…stop giving me that guilty look, Glisa!"

Glisa's eyes were rivaling Bambi's in size. "But it's _la Navidad_, Jess!"

Jess stomped her foot on the floor of the boat. "No! We're not giving the villains a ride! There is no way, no way, no _possible way_—"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"See?" Jess said, as the boat drove up to the shores of Hummingbird Hollow. "I told you we weren't going to go pick up the villains."

"Wow, we actually averted a cliché," Seth mused, as he tossed the bag of presents from the boat to the dock.

"A monumental moment," Long agreed, as he helped the other heroes make the step from the boat to the dock. The heroes jogged up the hill and paused at the top to admire the view. Hummingbird Hollow was decked out in Christmas decorations—flashing lights covered trees and buildings, giant snowflakes dangled from streetlights, and cheerful holiday music was even being played in the town.

"We must be going to the villains' arcade then, right?" Damion guessed. "Seth, was there any really important place you and Kit-Kat visited during your first visit here?"

Seth shook his head. "Nothing memorable. Nothing they even showed in that episode, anyways. All we did was go to the café, walk in the street, and avoid getting trampled by fan-girls."

"Let's get to the arcade, then!" said Jess. "The pirates must already be there, and for once, I think I'll be pretty glad to see them!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Whoa!" Hazel seemed absolutely shocked the heroes were the first ones to get inside the arcade. The arcade itself had been stripped of all the villains' work on it, it was completely unrecognizable. There was no more Goomba carpeting or big game machines. Now, the arcade was filled with Christmas decorations, including a huge tree in the corner and a cozy fireplace as well.

"…what?" Riley asked her, very puzzled.

"I did not think it was possible!" Hazel replied, with a huge grin. "You've won two challenges in a row, in a three-part challenge! That, like, never happens!"

Jess shrugged. "Guess it just did."

"So now what happens?" Damion asked. "We win the overall challenge, right? Do we still do the third part?"

Beeper beamed at them. "Of course! It's the best part, my friends! Empty out your bags." The heroes did as they were told, and presents spilled out from the bag and onto the floor.

"Each bag has a tag on it," Beeper continued. "But instead of a name, they have a couplet."

"_More_ rhyming?" Jess asked, a tad incredulous. "Did one of you take a poetry class or something?"

Beeper's answer was poorly disguised in between a cough. "Maybe."

"Anyways, there are twenty-four stockings over the fireplace," Hazel continued, gesturing towards the aforementioned fireplace. "You're giving presents to twelve. If you put the presents in the correct stockings—based on the clues the couplets give—then you win this part of the challenge! Which really doesn't matter anymore! But hey, you're giving gifts, so that's cool. And afterwards we get to par-TAY!"

"So…" Jess began. "This whole challenge has been to save presents, deliver presents, and arrange presents. And then we have a party."

"Yup!" Hazel replied.

Jess still seemed rather bewildered. "But that's so…cutesy for this show."

Hazel scowled, and in a rather surprising show of sarcasm replied: "What, do you want us to get our cannons out and shoot at you guys, instead?"

Jess instantly squatted down and innocently started to sort through presents. "Nah, I'm good." The villains—rather desperate for breath—burst in a moment later. Hazel gave them a curious look.

"Welcome!" she said, with a still friendly grin. She explained the challenge to the villains, then cheerfully started some Christmas music and allowed the campers to go about their sorting business.

"But…but…do we lose, then?" Lola asked, desperately.

"Don't worry about it," Hazel replied, dismissively.

"How can I _not_ wor—!"

"Because I said so," Hazel interrupted her, still cheerful. Lola scowled, and moved back towards the heroes to sort the presents.

"I don't exactly see the point anymore," Lola muttered under her breath.

"Meh." Lacey shrugged. "More Christmas cheer for everyone."

Meanwhile, the heroes were busy at work deciphering their clues.

"Okay," Aaron mused, as he read the clue of the present he was holding. "'_Even if she's still an evil queen bee, this villain will get a present under her tree'_."

"Lola," all the heroes said instantaneously.

"Hey!" Sienna looked insulted. "I'm a queen bee too!"

"Yes, but you're not evil," Riley pointed out.

**(Confession Cam: The naughty outweigh the nice?)**

** Logan—**"Pfft. That's what they might think. It's like that girl's sole purpose in life is to drive me crazy." _(He grins.) _"I totally dig that."

()()()()()()()()

"Ooh, so do I get to open that?" Lola asked, eyeing her present with excitement.

"No!" Hazel shouted, abruptly bursting into the room. The campers all jumped at the sudden interruption. "Wait…what was the question?"

Lola rolled her eyes. "I was asking if I could open my present."

"Well, then I was right!" Hazel declared. "No! Aaron, put that present in Lola's stocking over yonder. You can't even be sure it's her present, anyways. Okay…" absentmindedly, the pirate then retreated into the back-room where the other pirates were.

"They really are crazy, aren't they?" Riley asked, amused. "Anyways, presents, let's do this thing…" Admittedly, the campers weren't in a terrible rush for this part of the challenge. It was the least life-threatening challenge up to date, and probably the least life-threatening challenge they'd ever get. Many of the villains were also a bit apathetic about the whole thing, considering they had lost the challenge.

And so, clues were read and deciphered and presents were placed in the stockings. The heroes and the villains' separate present piles were both a mixture of hero and villain presents, and past/current contestants.

"_This queen bee may have spewed some lies, but it was capture-the-flag that brought her demise,_"Zane read aloud.

"Oh, that's right!" Seth exclaimed. "I forgot that we had _three_ queen bees on this show!"

"Does that mean we screwed up my earlier clue?" Aaron asked.

"No, I'm pretty sure Zane's clue refers to Laura," Arlen piped up. He sighed forlornly. "So hot…gone so fast…"

"If you say something like 'why must the hot die young', I'm throwing your stocking off the Thousand-Foot Cliff," Chelsea warned him. Arlen just grinned, unfazed.

"Hey, we've moved from threats that involve you beating me up," he observed. "I'd say that's an improvement!"

Chelsea rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but smirk. "Yeah. Keep up that optimism."

"Hey, I think this is yours…" Long commented, showing a clue to Zane. "Right?"

Zane skimmed over the clue. It read: _It's always the quiet ones, when push comes to shove; he's great at the challenges but luckless in love!_

Zane sighed. "Unfortunately."

"If it's any consolation," Long turned the present around in his hands as he spoke, "I think it's a new book…or maybe a few…"

"Interesting. Knowing the pirates, though, it'll probably be something like Captain Underpants…"

Long smiled. "Probably," he agreed.

"Okay, okay…" Lacey moved over to the heroes, showing them a clue on her present. "It says this is a hero but I have no idea who it's talking about. Somebody wanna help me out?"

"Ooh, lemme see," Aaron offered. Lacey shrugged and sat down next to Aaron, handing him the present. Aaron peered at the little tag taped onto the top of the brightly-colored wrapping paper.

"_A heroine whose time just didn't last, got booted for speaking up a tad too fast," _Aaron read. Immediately, he scowled. "Well, what the heck does _that_ mean?"

"Well, you know it's someone who's been eliminated…" Zarya mumbled.

"Demi!" Jess exclaimed. "Right? In that duel challenge?"

"Ah, yes…" Long murmured. "The duel of movie quotes."

"Yeah," Riley agreed. "Well…it was more of a matter of saying the wrong thing, but still, I think that's Demi's present."

"Can't we just open all of these and decide who gets what?" Arlen complained.

"No," Sienna responded.

"Why not?" Logan whined, joining his friend's side.

"Because…because…" Sienna faltered in her response.

"Because _Santa Claus is watching you_!" Lacey finished.

"Oh please," Logan said, rolling his eyes. "We know he doesn't exist."

**(Confession Cam: Life's gonna suck when you grow up…!)**

** Arlen—**"Wait…" _(A look of horror dawns on him.) _"He…he doesn't?"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Personally, I just don't want to invoke the wrath of the pirates," commented Damion.

"Aw, dey are not dat bad," Glisa said, with a large smile. "In fact, dey are not bad at all! Dey got us all presents, and dey got us out of a challenge of Chris's, right?"

"But one of us is still gonna get eliminated after this," Lola pointed out, as she gestured to her team.

"Well, then we might as well enjoy this," Zarya said, quietly. She looked up and gave her team a half-smile. "Um…right?" The other villains seemed pretty bewildered that Zarya was smiling, let alone telling them to enjoy the party.

**(Confession Cam: Aaand…we're done.)**

** Zarya—**_(Slightly irritated.) _"What? I'm not allowed to smile, now?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

So, the campers continued sorting the presents and talking with each other, all the while occasionally using the other team to help decipher clues. Hazel peeked out at them from a crack in the door that led to the backroom.

"Yes!" she whispered loudly, in a triumphant tone. She closed the door and turned towards her fellow pirates with an immense grin. "They are totally working together! And stuff!"

"Oh my gosh!" Beeper was jumping up and down. "This is so cool! And nobody's arguing?"

"Nobody!" Hazel assured her. Squealing, the two girls hugged each other. From across the room, Lou and Harper gave each other sideway glances.

"I give it two challenges before something goes horribly wrong," Harper commented.

Lou smirked. "I give it one."

"Deal." The two shook hands.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Sure enough, the pirates challenge had seemed to fill the campers with downright giddiness. The campers were more occupied with talking to each other as opposed to actually doing the challenge. This went on for about an hour until finally there was one present left to sort.

Seth held it curiously in one hand and then read the clue aloud. "_This hero's best friend is the gamer, and this is no tale that we've spun— this season he's wanted to ask her out, probably since day one._"

There was a long, awkward silence, and Seth blazed crimson.

"Oh!" Arlen realized. "Hey, I know, I know! The clue's talking about Seth!" Chelsea elbowed him.

Riley gave Seth an odd look, but she was smiling. "Seth? Is…that true?" Despite the fact that he seemed to be staggering into unconsciousness, Seth nodded. Riley suddenly lunged forward and kissed him, leaving the others slack-jawed and feeling a little intrusive.

Beeper, always ready to save the day, stepped in with a moment-killer.

"OH MY GOSH FINALLY YES!" she shouted, whooping and throwing her hands up in the air. Several campers covered their ears. "Anyways, um…we actually kinda ran out of time because you guys took so long to finish the challenge. But! Grab your present (I think everything's in the right place, but I'm too lazy to check) and we'll be sure to send the ex-campers' presents to the Playa des Losers! We're heading back to Wawanakwa, folks!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Harper caught Seth's arm on the way out and held him back as the other campers started to head back to their rides.

"That's not what the clue said," Harper commented.

"Ehm?" Seth questioned, puzzled.

Harper smiled, awkwardly. "I-I mean…on the clue that you read, the clue to your present, that's not what Beeper wrote down as your clue. That was too long to fit on that tag, anyway. But it was a very nice rhyme. Very well done."

"Don't tell anyone," Seth pleaded with him.

"Oh, dude, of course not," Harper said, with a nod. "No, I think that was a cool way to ask her out or…um…yeah. You get my point." Seth nodded, and smiled.

"Thanks," he said. "So, hey, I was wondering, well…"

"Wh-wh-why am I with three insane pirates?" Harper guessed.

Seth rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah. That."

Harper paused, his features reddening a bit. "Well…"

Hazel hopped through the doorway then, and moved in front of Harper with a grin. "Hiya, cutie!" And before Seth could blink, Hazel kissed Harper. Seth laughed and walked away, joining the heroes on the Boat of Losers.

()()()()()()()()()()()

Zane unwrapped his present on the black speedboat that he, Logan, Lacey, and Sienna occupied.

"Well," he said, eyeing the stack of books he had been given. The top one was a Captain Underpants book. "Look at that. I was right." And then he laughed.

Immediately, the heads of the three others swiveled in his direction. Zane suddenly felt quite self-conscious.

"Um…" he started.

"Dude," Logan said, incredulously. "You just _laughed_." Clearly amazed, Logan apparently felt the need to share this with the other boat. He pressed down on the radio that the boat had and shouted to the others on the white boat: "HEY! ZANE JUST _LAUGHED_!"

_"Zane can LAUGH?" _Chelsea's voice came from the other end, sounding shocked.

"I know, right?" Logan exclaimed.

Zane just groaned and buried his head in his hands.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The campers, still cheerful, continued to talk to each other all the way back to the mess hall. The sight of Chris sobered them up fast.

"Oh yeah," Damion sighed. "The villains lost."

"No need to tell me," Chris replied. "Chef and I watched you guys here." Scowling, he threw his hands up in the air. "And what's with all this reconciliation crap? Riley and Seth getting together? Zane actually laughing? NO! I suppose you'd like Lola and Seth to make up now, or something?"

Seth looked at Lola, inquiringly.

"I'll pass," Lola told him, with a smirk. Seth just rolled his eyes.

"Anyways," Chris continued, his annoyance a bit subdued now, "the villains are still on the chopping block, so meet me at the campfire at eight-o'-clock sharp tonight!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"So, what'd you get?" Lacey asked Sienna, as the two of them left the mess hall and started to walk back to the villainesses' cabin.

"Some random makeup stuff and a camera," Sienna replied. "But a Polaroid." She hefted the object out of her bag and showed it to Lacey, all the while giving her a slightly sardonic expression. "Nifty, eh? How about you?"

"A few CDs. And something labeled 'The Lost Treasure of the Ancient Island of Ancient-ness'."

"Treasure, huh?" Sienna grinned, amused at Lacey's deadpan expression. "Great, maybe we can buy our way out of this show."

"That depends if some people really do accept getting paid in _Trident Layers_…" Lacey held up the pack of gum, and Sienna giggled.

"It's the thought that counts?" she tried for.

"Yippee." Smirking, Lacey unwrapped the pack of gum and popped a piece in her mouth.

"Can I have one?" Sienna questioned, still giggling.

"No way. Get your own lost treasure."

Zane and Zarya had hung behind to let the other campers pass by, and now they found themselves walking to each other. They both were silent, although they occasionally glanced at each other, only to look away just as quickly.

**Meanwhile…**

Up on a rooftop (click, click, click?) stood the four pirates. A very irate Lou was holding a fishing pole, and on the end of it was some mistletoe.

"Truly," Lou muttered, loud enough for Hazel to hear. "This is the stupidest thing you've ever had me done. And we've done some pretty stupid things."

"Well," Harper suggested, dangling his feet over the roof. "There's always room for improvement…"

"Shh!" Hazel whispered. "They're coming! Don't let them hear you and—Lou! Lou, cast off already!"

"Ugh…"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Um…ow?"

Zane, for the umpteenth time that day, was at a loss for words. Out of nowhere, some mistletoe had flown through the air and hit him in the eye.

Zarya, equally as confused, stared at the plant as if it were a troll. They both silently seemed to decide to just walk away and pretend that a Christmas plant had not just assaulted Zane, but that's unfortunately when they were spotted by Glisa.

"Oh!" She said, excitedly. "Dis is where you must give her _un beso_, Zane!"

"I…" Zane looked terrified.

"A _kiss_, Zane, a _kiss_!" Glisa prompted him. Zane turned to Zarya, hoping that she might say something to spur off Glisa's excitement, but she just sighed, rolled her eyes, and pressed her lips against Zane's. Shocked, Zane turned red. And in a few seconds it was over.

"Huh," Zarya mused.

Zane, however, was a bit more vocal.

"What on Earth is with you?" Zane shouted. "You've been ignoring me for—for—the past six challenges, all because of a stupid video that I didn't put up, and now you _kiss_ me?"

"I don't care," Zarya said, with a shrug.

"Don't care about what?" Zane questioned, in a surprisingly loud voice. Glisa was starting to innocently back away from the scene.

Zarya looked down. "I don't care anymore. About who put up that video. It doesn't matter."

"But you've been giving me the cold shoulder!" Zane reminded her, furiously. "You've been acting like I was the one who did it!"

"Because I thought it was you who did it!" Zarya snarled back, suddenly defensive. "We were the only ones there!" A crowd of confused, observing campers was starting to form.

"Chris has cameras everywhere, Zarya. Look how much Lola was able to find out!" Zane pointed out.

"It's not even about who did it," Zarya shot back, "it's that—it's that it was done in the first place! Because you can't be in a relationship on this show without getting complete crap for it, Zane! It just doesn't happen! There are no happy couples on this show, and—and—you shouldn't even like me anyway! I give you nothing but crap and you still save my butt from fan-girls and, and—" Zarya whipped her head around. "And **WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PEOPLE HERE?****!"**

The crowd of heroes and villains instantly scrambled away.

"Zarya, I do like you. I really like you," Zane said, after a long silence. "And I certainly don't think it'd be the worst thing in the world if we…if we went out. I mean, I would like it. And I think you need to trust me about this."

"Why?" Zarya demanded.

"Because there's one big difference between us and all the others."

Zarya heaved a sigh. "What's that?"

Zane gave her a small smile. "We're the smart ones, remember?" And at that, Zarya smiled as well.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Greetings, villains! Or should I say season's greetings?" Chris questioned, laughing. Chef stood beside him. "Now then, let's get right down to it! Oh, for the holiday season, these marshmallows have a peppermint flavor! Yum. Anyways, here are the names…if your name isn't called, then you must walk the Dock of Shame, catch the Boat of Losers, and never come back here ever a—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Hazel said, striding towards the campfire, and interrupting Chris's monolog, which was probably breaking a sacred rule of some sort. "Whoa. _Whoa_. Back up here, compadre."

"Aren't you guys supposed to have left by now?" Chris asked, irritably.

"In a few minutes!" Hazel replied. "Anywho, you can't eliminate someone on this challenge! It's the Christmas challenge!"

"And?"

"IT'S. _CHRISTMAS_," Hazel repeated, louder, in case Chris hadn't heard.

"Yeah, I go that part," Chris said, with a smirk. "But we have to eliminate someone, we've only got a certain number of episodes we're allowed to do, and so, someone must go. Tonight."

Hazel shook her head. But without another word, she walked away.

"Jeez," Logan muttered. "That wasn't much of a fight."

"Ah well," Sienna sighed. The two of them were sitting next to each other. "It was worth a shot."

"Anyways, names," Chris continued. "Here we go! Starting with…S—" Suddenly there was a strange hissing noise, and they all looked around, confused. "What the heck…" Then, a thick fog erupted, leaving the campers and Chris all blinded in it. They all shouted in protest, but the sound of other people shouting made them quiet. Then there was an explosion, which made the villains a tad bit panicked again. After a few long minutes, the fog cleared.

The villains all looked around. Nothing seemed to be different, asides from the fact that the Dock of Shame and the Boat of Losers were both missing.

"Wow," Lacey said, slowly.

"What just happened?" Chris asked, weakly.

"Ha-ha!" The voice of the insane pirate cackled as the sled flew over the island. "There shall be no eliminations tonight, my friends, for there shall be no way to eliminate someone! Your pitiful Boat of Losers and it's wooden companion the Dock of Shame are gone and never to return!"

"Oh dear God she's left us trapped here," Zane muttered, his shoulders slumped.

"Well, you can't say they're not thorough," commented Sienna.

"Yes, all in the name of Christmas cheer!" cried Hazel, from above. "Now, a merry Christmas to all, and to all a—" she paused, for there was suddenly a noise that could only be described as a mongoose having a cough attack. The flames disappeared from the sled; they slowly lost power and fell to the water below. Amazingly (the laws of physics began to tear up a bit) they stayed afloat.

"Paddles out!" exclaimed Beeper. And the pirates began to row away.

Chris turned around, looking hopelessly dazed. "I need a nap. No elimination tonight, just, just…"

"Just some time to see if we can schedule an appointment with our therapist friends?" Lacey suggested.

"Yeah," Chris replied, weakly. "That."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Riley looked out the window, and gaped. The snow was gone, and the ice had melted. It was a green, sunny, beautiful summer day.

"That was the shortest winter _ever_," she said.

But such was the life of a Christmas special.

**(A.N.)**

And a haaaaapy new yeeeear…

Yup, that's me, spreading the holiday cheer long after holiday cheer is due. Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, as silly and as cheesy as it was. Thank you guys for being awesome and whatnot. Anyway, thanks for reading, and review if you get the chance!


	15. An Epic Finale, Part One

**(A.N.) **Who missed me! I missed me. Yeah, hence the title this is…well…you'll just have to see. And just a warning, despite the ridiculously large amount of names at the beginning, they definitely thin down.

This chapter is brought to you by a rather uncalled for shift to present tense.

()()()()()()()()()()

Well. Isn't this a familiar scene?

The sun is shining on Camp Wawanakwa. The water is absolutely pristine (just don't look at it too long – no really, the chemicals might damage your retinas if you get too close). The dock, after being blown up some Christmas past, has just been reconstructed to its old crappy glory. And standing on that old crappy dock is everyone's favorite old crappy host – Chris McClain, grinning like he just told a Kindergarten class that Santa doesn't exist and their mothers don't love them.

"We're comin' at you live from Camp Wawanakwa!" Chris laughs. "Oh, what happened to the old campers, you're asking? Ah, we got bored of 'em. They are…Chef, where are they?" Chef (standing off to the side) shrugs, nonchalantly. The camera quickly pans to a large group of teens nervously wandering around in some underground sewer.

"Was that a crocodile?" one asks, as a large animal splashes in the distance.

"Alligator, actually—"

"SHUT UP SETH, NOBODY CARES."

The camera quickly cut back to Chris. "Yeah, we got really tired of that old story, so I figured we'd just trash it and start over! You know the drill by now, so send in your applications and we'll subject you to a few months of torture so you can get some money that you'll lose sometime in the next week." A short pause. "Figure I might as well be straight about it. Anyway, let's do this thing!"

**Name:**

** Gender (if it's one of THOSE names):**

** Age:**

** Physical appearance:**

** Personali—**

** BZERK.**

** WARNING.**

** I AM ERROR. **

** ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.**

** WE HAVE HACKED ALL THE SYSTEMS. ALL OF THEM.**

** THAT WAS FUN, BUT NOW YOU'RE DONE, YOU'RE OUT OF LUCK, BECAUSE YOU SUCK…**

Abruptly, the screen goes black.

The camera zooms out, revealing two young men sitting in front of a computer. Well, rather – one is dutifully sitting in front of the computer; the other is facing the opposite direction, nonchalantly sipping a smoothie. After a moment the smoothie drinker glances over to his comrade's work on the computer and smirks.

"Got enough nerdy references there, Debbie?"

'Debbie' crosses his arms and scowls defensively. "It worked. That's what matters, right?"

"Sure, sure. What, exactly, did you interrupt? The intro was already done. How did you…you interrupted the application process? That doesn't even make sense."

"You know what," the hacker fellow says, closing his laptop rather suddenly. "That's not important. The important thing is the situation is in our hands. Or rather, in my hands. Because you didn't really do anything, Riley."

Riley spreads his arms out, innocently. "Moral support, Raphael. Besides, I got you this sweet set-up, didn't I?"

Raphael nods. The computer lab was situated on the top level of a tower that had rather randomly sprouted up from the largest building on the Playa des Losers. It was stocked to the brim with devices, including a mysterious laptop that had a creepy blue glow and seemed to be able to tamper with reality itself. The laptop had not originally been in the computer lab's arsenal of technology. After the boat carrying Raphael's season's contestants had crashed (that's what happens when you have a shipful of ex-reality show contestants and nobody actually steering the boat) Raphael found the laptop on the shores of the Playa des Losers. Despite being obviously soaked, the laptop worked fine. It was just really…creepy.

They'd been stranded for months. Nobody seemed to care about any old reality stars, especially ones who were literal wash-ups. Along with the old losers were the current losers who were also pretty pissed that their show was in a standstill. Nobody else was coming to the Playa des Losers, nobody gave them any info, and nobody was winning the stupid game!

At least, not if _they_ had anything to say about it. Unfortunately they didn't have much to say about it. A bunch of sixteen and seventeen-year-olds are not the best demographic to come up with plans and act on them.

But then Raphael found that nifty laptop and after testing its capacities (basically screwing around and illegally downloading music) he decided to put it to good use and try to get the new and old campers some closure to end their stories once and for all.

"So, what do you propose?" Riley asks him now, as he balances his smoothie on top of his head.

"We kill the Batman."

"What?"

"Er, I mean – I think we should have one more competition. To finally get a winner for their season and maybe get our asses off the island."

"Aw, it's not so bad. Perpetually staying at a lavish resort? There could be worse things."

"Well, I'm pretty sure everybody back home thinks we're dead. That's a bit troublesome."

"Haven't you been able to contact anybody?"

"With all this stuff, you think I'd be able to, but no. I can't send anything out and nothing can get sent in. It's like we're in some sort of Limbo, here."

"Even your super-special laptop can't do anything?"

Raphael shakes his head. "No. I don't understand it. But I think if we can end this season, we can take ourselves out of Limbo and get ourselves back home."

Riley laughs. "When did this suddenly become a fantasy story?"

"This is serious business," Raphael says, stubbornly. "Now then, I have to get the message out to everyone on this resort, using the technology in this room…"

"Or," Riley suggests dryly, "we could walk down and _tell_ them."

Raphael blinks slowly. "Oh. Yes. Right. Let's do that."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Does anyone remember how we ended up here?" Seth asks, as he and his comrades peered around the corner, fearful of seeing another creature looming in the murky water. "Something seems off."

"_Besides _the fact that we're wandering around in some godforsaken sewer maze?" Lola snarks, shivering slightly.

"It's not a waste sewer at least," Lacey sighs. She glances at Logan. "We've had some _fun times_ down here, eh?"

"Shouldn't you remember how to get out of dis place?" Glisa asks. "No offense, mi amigo, I just assume…"

"Yeah, I know." Lacey rolls her eyes. "I don't get it. I think somehow they redid this whole place. I mean I recognize random crap here and there but the paths seem different."

"Is this supposed to be some big metaphor for something?" Seth wonders aloud.

"No…" Lacey says dryly, "No, I'm pretty sure Chris is just screwing with us."

"This isn't our next challenge, is it?" Damion asks.

"We've been down here so long," Long observes, quietly. "With no direction and no change. I don't think that this is a challenge."

"So…dude! Chris is totally trying to off us!" Aaron looks towards the others with worry.

"He wouldn't go that far…right?" Sienna bites her lip. "Alright, someone refute me, please. Even false reassurance would be nice at this point."

"We will totally kick this sewer's ass, babe!" Logan assures her, holding up two thumbs up.

"Not to wreck the happy feelings…time…thing," Zane sighs, "but I believe we've reached another dead end."

"Again!" Logan bellows, pointing at the wall. "That friggin' sign is everywhere!" Indeed, there was another _CC WUZ HERE _spray-painted onto the gloomy gray wall. "Who the hell is CC?"

"Probably some intern," Zarya mutters. "Perhaps we'll stumble upon their bones on our venture."

"That's the spirit," Riley proclaims sarcastically, with a little fist-pump to accentuate it. "Christmas spirit fading?"

"Faded. Dead. Buried in a titanium chest and thrown into the deepest depths of the ocean and preferably shackled to Chris's ankle." Zarya storms past the group, away from the dead end. "I really hate this stupid place."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"What are we supposed to do?" Kit-Kat asks the ridiculously large group that had assembled around the pool. She clasps her hands together. "I'm so worried about the others…especially Long! I wish we could hear from them."

"Well, what's stopping us from going over there?" Rosetta questions. "How about we just barge in? I have no problem with getting in Chris's face."

"Well, problem one…" Bren starts. "We have no boat."

"What about the Jet-Skis?" Doe asks, hopefully. "I remember having those!"

Isaac shakes his head. "Out of fuel, sweetheart. We're stuck on this crap-sack."

"Let's swim!" Effie cries. "Everyone climb on my back and I shall CARRY YOU! For I am the chosen one! Born with untold power, risen by manatees…I shall fulfill my destiny!"

Doe grins and hugs her redheaded and certifiable insane friend. "Aw man, if we ever do get off of this place, I am gonna miss the crap out of you, sensei!"

"Problem two?" Mo prompts, looking at Bren. "Sounded like you were going on a roll."

"Problem two, what's gonna make Chris listen to us?" Bren questions. "Not to be blunt, but he doesn't give a shit about what we want."

"We'll make him listen," Jack answers, fiercely.

"We _do _outnumber him," Damion points out.

"Guys, guys," Ashlynn sooths them. "Listen. We're not going to have to threaten Chris. Well, not unless we want to."

"What makes you say that?" Demi asks.

Ashlynn cracks a grin. "A coup staged by two season's worth of contestants? I think that'd make for pretty good TV, hm?"

"Alright," Bren agrees. "Problem three…where _are_ the other contestants? Raphael says that they're starting a new season, so you think they'd just send the other contestants over here. But we haven't been able to call them or anything."

"I'm sure they're still on the island," Rachel says confidently.

Charity grimaces. "Poor guys."

"What if they _did_ escape?" Leti asks. "Oh my goodness, they could've traveled north all the way to…to Japan or something!"

"Uh, Leti—" Kevin starts.

Kenny shook his head at him. "Don't bother, bro."

"Bren's right, though," Joel cuts in sharply. "No boat, no point. Can I go now? I have important things to do."

His twin brother Leo grins at him. "Don't worry, I recorded those _My Little Pony_ episodes for you."

Allister raises an eyebrow. "_My Little Pony_? Really, Joel?"

Joel put his hands over his ears. "Shut up! It's a well-made show with good animation and clever writing! THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH GROWN MEN WATCH LITTLE PONIES HAVE FUN AND EXCITNG ADVENTURES!"

"Um. Ow," Raphael mutters, plugging his own ears.

Joel grumbles and crosses his arms.

"Okay, can we stay on track please?" Jack sighs. "Boat. We. Need. A boat."

"DID SOMEONE SAY…BOAT?" A loud voice cried in the distance.

"Oh jeez," Kit-Kat whimpers. "_Them_."

"Them?" Doe asks, perking up. "Who's them?"

"Is it…" Rosetta squints, looking towards the distance. "Oh my god, it's the pirates!"

Indeed, stopped on the shores of the Playa des Losers is a magnificent pirate ship. Well, magnificent-ish. The boat is painted purple and the sail is cheetah print, but at least it's…big? A tall and muscular young woman stands at the helm, brandishing a plastic lightsaber for some reason.

The old and older contestants rush towards the boat to get a closer look.

"No, really, _did_ somebody say boat?" Hazel, the insane pirate captain asks the group. "You guys were kind of far away so we couldn't really hear anything…sorry we're late! Harper took a surprisingly large time to get this thing fixed up."

"We live on an island with no access to supplies!" Harper cries as he steps into sight. "And none of you guys ever tried to help! EVER!"

"Can you guys get us a ride to Camp Wawanakwa?" Jack asks, cutting to the chase.

"Hell to the yes my young friend," Hazel replies. "Beeper! Lower the ladder!"

"Yes captain!" A short pause. "We don't have a ladder."

"Hm, troubling indeed…do we have someone with exceptionally long hair?"

Beeper, the short spiky haired pirate turns towards the side. "Hey, Lou!"

"NO." The angry voice comes from inside the ship's small cabin.

Beeper turns back. "I guess we can't 'Rapunzel' it."

"You guys must have rope, right?" Demi guesses. "That seems pretty standard for pirates."

"Yeah, I guess we do…" Hazel ducks down for a moment then throws a long rope over the side of the boat. The grumbling teenagers wade into the water and climb up the rope, one by one.

"Oh god, it's high-school gym all over again," Satine whimpers.

"I got'cha!" Hazel extends an arm and flings Satine into the ship. Eventually, all the teens make it onto the ship. Hazel runs to the bow of the ship and points her lightsaber upwards. She points it in the general direction of Camp Wawankwa, which the ship is now rapidly approaching.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Guys, I hate to get really morbid all in this place," Chelsea drawls, as the current contestants continued crawling across creepy coiling convolutions, "but…we're gonna need some food down here."

"I volunteer Seth to be eaten," Lola says rather quickly.

"Hey!" Seth crosses his arms.

"Aw, Lola, don't go and say stuff like that…" Lacey begins.

"_Thank _you—"

"Have you noticed how _scrawny_ this kid is? No nutrition value," Lacey finishes. She cracks a grin.

"AGH." Seth stomps off, then turns back to join the group after realizing he has no idea where the hell he's supposed to go.

"At least…you're not in a dress? Again?" Aaron offers Seth in condolence.

"Yeah. Thanks buddy."

"Guys, we gotta come up with a plan," Chelsea presses. "To escape…or at least get some food."

"Well, excuse me for a moment as I conjure up a double cheeseburger with my mind," Lola deadpans, pressing her fingers to her temples.

"Careful, don't make someone's brain melt," Riley S. chuckles.

"Most of us don't need to worry about that," Zarya notes.

Zane chuckles. "I'm sorry. I promised myself I'd never do this, but may I high-five you for that line?"

"That would be acceptable." The two quickly high-five.

"You two are freaking _weird_," Arlen mutters.

"PLAN." Chelsea shouts. "Jesus flipping pogo sticks, I never thought I'd see the day where _I _had to be the reasonable one in this group."

"Right, well…" Logan says, drumming his fingers against each other, "we could…kill crocodiles—"

"Alligators—" Seth starts.

"SHUT UP. We could kill them for food and…clothing!" Logan declares.

Chelsea slumps, dismally. "Anyone else?"

Arlen sidles up to her. "Well, if we're stuck down here, I can think of something to take up time." Chelsea shoved him so hard he knocked into the cameraman.

"Oh my god, we're gonna _fucking_ _die_," Chelsea groans, fisting her eyes.

"Un momento," Glisa interrupts. Her eyes go wide. "_Cameraman_?"

The group turns slowly to look at the cameraman that they only now seem to notice.

"Oh, hi," the cameraman says, and the cast soon realizes it's a camera_woman_. "Err…I guess I haven't really introduced myself. I'm CC!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"What do you _mean_ nobody's sending in applications?" Chris growls at Chef. Chef shrugs yet again.

"Maybe they got somethin' better to do," he suggests. "Instead of gettin' mauled on national TV."

"That's _ridiculous. _Everyone will humiliate themselves on live TV if there's money involved! There must be some bigger conspiracy involved."

Chef rolls his eyes and goes back to his Ernest Hemingway novel.

Suddenly, a crash is heard in the distance.

"What was that?" Chris whips his head towards the source of the noise. "That sounds _dangerously_ like someone costing me money. Chef, let's investigate!"

Chef slams his novel down on the kitchen table. "My cinnamon buns will burn!" he growls, pointing at the oven.

"Who cares about your cinnamon buns? Come on already, dude!" The two men ran off.

()()()()()()()()()

The contestants in the sewer gape at the camerawoman for a few seconds before anyone actually speaks up.

"How long have you been down here?" Jess asks.

"Um, since you've been down here," CC replies. She's a twenty-something young woman, a tad vertically challenged, with short, curly auburn hair. Her facial features all seem remarkably small: her dark eyes are squint as if they're not used to any source of light, her nose is pug-like, and her lips are thin and almost colorless. "Hello…dudes?" She makes some sort of MC Hammer-esque hand gesture. "Um. Bros?"

"Wow," Lola says, slowly. "I think we've found even _more_ awkward than Seth."

"Why am I the punch-line in every joke today?" Seth grumbles.

"So…we just never noticed you?" Glisa asks. "Oh my, dat's _terrible!_ Lo siento!"

"Oh, no, it's…yeah, it's totally okay! Blending in is part of the job. It's hard to always act candid on camera, so I try to stay unnoticed by you guys and stuff!"

"So the graffiti on the walls…" Logan says. "That was you?"

CC nods. "Yeah! I walked around here before the spy challenge to make sure that there wasn't anything too dangerous. I even filed the crocodile's teeth down to make sure that they couldn't hurt you guys too much!"

"You mean alligators?" Seth asks.

"No. They're crocodiles," CC replies. "Why?"

Seth coughs. "No…reason…"

"Wait, so Chris _isn't _trying to kill us!" Aaron says. "That's good news…right?"

CC rubs the back of her head. "Well. Um. Thing is, they're starting a new season, I think. And I think the plan was to keep you guys stuck down here until they could find some new contestants and Chris could find some contracts to get you guys on a new show."

"A _new_ show? That must be an improvement to here," Lola remarks. "What show?"

"Err. Well. Um…I believe Chris's choice was _Extreme Unicycle Riding With the TV Stars Whose Names You'll Probably Have to Google Because There's No Way You Remember Who They Actually Are."_

"How the hell do they fit that on the pamphlet?" Arlen wonders. "Way too many syllables, bro…"

"If Chris is negotiating our contracts then we are in definite trouble," Riley S. notes. "We need to escape. Fast."

"Yeah!" the rest of the group choruses, except for Chelsea.

"I. Already. SAID THAT," she hisses to the ceiling.

"So, you're a camerawoman then?" Sienna asks, paying no mind to Chelsea.

"Yeah, I edit a lot of the show and put it together. I handle the confession cam clips mostly. To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure how I ended up here. But hey, my camera works as a flashlight!" To demonstrate, CC flicks her camera light on and off. "_Wooo_! So hardcore!"

"Anyway," Zarya cuts in, rolling her eyes. "Shall we progress? Do you know a way out, CC?"

CC frowns. "Sorry. Not really. I think Chef did some stuff to this place so it's freaky and yeah."

"Well, that's…specific." Lacey cocks an eyebrow up. "But yeah, Zarya's right. Let's keep moving."

"Wait a second." Long jogs ahead a few steps and starts sniffing inexplicably. "CC, please shine your light on the ceiling spot here." Long points upward, and CC obliges.

"What are you doing?" Zane asks his friend.

Long smiles. "I smell burning cinnamon buns. And, if that hastily tacked on _One Direction _poster is anything to go by, I believe we have just found the 'hidden' trapdoor out of here."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Hoo, boy…" Chris slows to a stop in front of the pirate ship that's just crashed into his dock. "This should be interesting."

As he says this eight of the current losers, sixteen old contestants (also kind-of losers), and four not-so nefarious pirates drop down from the ship and land on the beach. Some of them manage to manage on their feet and look sufficiently badass. Others, not so much.

"OW," Raphael groans, rolling and clutching his hurt ankle. "Rope. Really should've used the rope to go down. Cool entrance was not worth it." Ashlynn chuckles and helps him up.

"Twenty-eight of you?" Chef realizes, after a quick headcount.

"Jesus," Chris says. "I _really_ need a cheat sheet, now…"

"YOU!" Doe exclaims, pointing a finger at Chris. "Bad man! What have you done with the current contestants?"

"You all remember Doe, our winner from last year?" Chris asks, turning to face the nearest camera. "No? I can't blame you." Doe gasps, and steps back, clearly hurt.

"HEY!" Kevin snarls. "That's my girlfriend you greasy-haired, mole-faced…douche canoe!"

"That was pretty good," Kenny complements.

Kevin beams. "Thanks, bro."

"Okay, hey, remember _us_?" Isaac asks, crossing his arms. "Y'know, the people from this season? Or has that slipped your mind, too?"

"Well, here's the deal," Chris begins.

"You're starting a new season and don't plan on finishing this one and leaving us in the lurch," Kit-Kat interrupts, scowling.

"No! Well, yes actually. But when you put it like that…"

"Where are our friends?" Demi asks. "All the current contestants? We haven't seen them or heard from them in months!"

"Tell the truth, scoundrel!" Hazel cries, holding her lightsaber at McClain's throat.

"This is _plastic_," Chris informs her, speaking very slowly. "You realize that, right?"

"CEASE YOUR DOUCHEBAGGERY AND TELL US THE TRUTH!" Hazel shouts.

"Agh…" Harper presses his fists into his eyes. "Can we…I don't know…start doing something mildly constructive?"

"Chef, c'mon, where are our friends?" Mo asks. "I totally slipped you a twenty, bro. You owe me."

"You tryin' to extort me, soldier?" Chef barks, making Mo jump back in shock. "I paid my debt, you fool!"

"What happened to your sword?" Chris asks Hazel, randomly.

"Err…I thought I'd get more modern!"

"You fool!" Raphael cries. "_Star Wars_ takes place in a galaxy a long, long time ago!"

"Whatever! A shark ate my sword and this was all I could find!" Hazel barks. "There, are you happy now?"

"Not really!" Chris replies, visibly annoyed. "There are way too many people here! Like, I'd need two pages of a cheat sheet to remember all you losers. Some of you guys have _got_ to go."

"We've been trying to go for the past several months!" Charity growls. "That's why we're here, dude!"

"And rescuing our friends," Kit-Kat pipes up. "That was pretty important too."

"Tell us where they are," Jack says. He glares at Chris. "Now."

Chris, in a suddenly childish state of petulance, sticks his tongue out at Jack. "Nyeh. Make me." Hazel sighs and holsters her lightsaber to her belt. She turns away from Chris and Chris smirks, triumphantly. Hazel's voice drops down dramatically as she speaks:

"I didn't want to do this, McClain. But you've left me no choice. Lou and Harper…restrain McClain. Beeper, you know what to do. I'd advise the rest of you to find refuge in the mess hall. I wouldn't want you to see this." Hazel's eyes narrow.

"Jesus," Bren says, nervously. "What are they going to _do_?"

()()()()()()()()

**What they are going to do:**

"_Pirates, we have problems too!_" Hazel and Beeper warble, in some horrible, horrible mockery of the very act of singing. "_We're just like you, except we're PIRATES! We shoot cannonballs through the skies, to tyrannize…random people, and sometimes we…um...!" _Beeper and Hazel exchanged looks. "_Sometimes…we…pie?_"

"Pie isn't a verb!" Chris sobs. "Oh God, this is horrible! Make it stop! I'll tell you where the contestants are!"

"NO NEED!" The pirates (and Chris) whip their heads towards the source of the noise. From the back of the mess hall emerge the current contestants and CC. Lacey, leading the group, is grinning widely.

"Who wants cinnamons rolls, bitches?" She laughs, admittedly a bit hyped up over their recent escape.

"I do!" Beeper says cheerfully.

"McClain," Jess hisses, ignoring Beeper and walking up to Chris. "You want to say anything?"

"Yeah," Chris replies. "Who the hell are _you_?" he asks, pointing at CC.

"Um, one of the cameramen," CC replies.

Chris stares at her blankly.

"I've been working her for five years," CC adds, awkwardly.

"Not ringing a bell. Anyway…hey," Chris finishes lamely, looking at the current-ish batch of contestants.

"_Hey_? Dat's all you have to say?" Glisa asks, her hands on her hips. "You tried to kill us! Or at least replace us on dis show and sign us off to some sucky one!"

"So? Aren't you kind of used to that by now?" Chris snaps, finally shaking Lou and Harper off of him. Scowling, he brushes himself off and crosses his arms as he glares at the crowd of contestants.

"Maybe the trying-to-kill-us thing, but getting rid of the show before I can even get my money?" Logan asks. "That's just going too far, dude." Sienna punches him on the shoulder. "Ow! What was that for?"

"For being an arrogant prick who'd assume he'd win this stupid thing!"

"I'd take you out on a nice dinner!" Logan whines, rubbing his arm.

Sienna cocks an eyebrow upwards. "_Would_ you, now…" She smirks, slightly. "On the off chance that you actually _do_ win anything, I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

"Can we ignore the romantic sub-plots and get on with the important stuff?" Zane asks sardonically.

"You're one to talk," Lacey mutters. "Your sub-plot wasn't a nonsensical, nonlinear _mess_."

"Although we never did find out who put the video up," Zarya murmurs.

"GUYS!" Chelsea shouts. "Calm your tits!" She points a finger at Chris. "Dude, we need some closure or…something! This show needs a winner!"

"Reality shows get cancelled all the time, dudes," Chris drawls. "Your time's up, and that's that. We've already sent out the apps for a new season, and the response has been way strong…right, Chef?"

"Actually…" Chef answers, whipping out an iPad and squinting at the screen. "Those apps we sent out got screwed up and disappeared, or somethin'."

"Ha!" Seth exclaims. "So you don't have a new show at all! Which means you can finish this one!"

"_Can_ being the important word there, bro," says Chris. He smirks. "And just because I can doesn't mean I _want_ to."

"You…now you're just being a spiteful douche!" Aaron declares. "Why won't you finish this season? We should at least have, like, one final challenge to see who the winner can be!"

Chris inhaled, pretending to think about it. "…nah."

"HM." Hazel's eyes flashed dangerously. "I didn't want to do this other thing that's totally unrelated (but not really) to that other act that I previously didn't want to do, Chris, but you've let me no choice. Again. Hope you're happy."

"Oh dear sweet mother of God," Harper complains, his shoulders slumping. "Please don't tell me you're doing _that_."

"What?" Riley S. asks, confused. "What the heck are they talking about?"

()()()()()()()()()()

**What the heck they are talking about:**

Chris, once again restrained by Harper and Lou, twitches violently as Beeper and Hazel once again serenade him. They are dressed in clown outfits. The current contestants watch the scene in a transfixed state of horror.

"DET-DET-DETA-DETA CIRCUS AFRO, DET-DET DETA-DETA CIRCUS AFRO, CIRCUS AFRO, CIRCUS AFRO, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT AFRO!"

"Dear God, make it stop!" Chris howls, after about ten minutes of that upper paragraph repeated ad infinitum. "Okay! We'll have a final stupid challenge!"

"Yay!" Beeper exclaims, pumping a fist in the air.

"I'm not sure if watching ten minutes of that was worth it," Zane whimpers, hiding behind Long, who is awkwardly and reassuringly patting his friend's head.

"_Jesus_," Chris says, clearly annoyed. "Okay, fine, if we're doing this thing, we're doing it on my conditions. Meaning, some of you guys have to go. Not you current contestants—that giant crowd of people in my mess hall."

"You can't get rid of all of them," Long says, a bit too quickly. "You need an audience here, don't you?"

Aaron elbows him, playfully. "Want to keep Kit-Kat around, huh?"

Chris interrupts before Long can say anything. "Okay, well _most_ of them have to go! Somebody get them out here!" CC ran off to get the group outside. Once everybody was gathered by the beach, Chris continued. "Most of you are gonna _need_ to get your sorry faces out of here. So…stand here on this 'X' if you want to leave sooner rather than later." Chris points to a red X that had suddenly appeared on the sand.

"That's oddly convenient," Seth muses.

Eventually, a group has assembled on the X: Leo, Jade, Thomas, Kevin (after a long goodbye with Doe couldn't be convinced to leave), Allister, Rachel, Joel, Charity, and Hunter.

"Wait," Rachel begins. "What happened to Laura, Warren, and Alice? They were—"

"WHOOPS LOOK AT THE TIME." Chris pulls a lever (that had also quite randomly appeared). Nothing happened. "Wha…what the hell?" Chris complains. "You guys were supposed to get catapulted out of here!"

"Did you bury a catapult under the sand and expect it to work?" Allister asks, crossing his arms. "No wonder your shows keep flopping, you're just too _stupid_." Chris seethes, but says nothing.

"Figured this might happen," Chef grumbles. "C'mon, we've got Jet Skis, spy speedboats, and some other crap out back…"

"Bye guys!" Charity calls out, as their group follows Chef to the beach. "Good luck!" Disjointed goodbyes came from the remaining campers, and soon enough they were out of sight.

"That still leaves thirty-seven people," Mo announces, deadpan. "This is a _mess_."

"It's _always_ a mess," Lacey points out. "That's the freaking tagline of this show."

"So…what are we going to do, now?" Sienna asks. "I'm guessing you don't have a plan for the final challenge."

"True," Chris agrees, scowling. "Although we did have some challenge ideas that we never got to do for this season."

"Can we throw those together and have one hodgeposh of a challenge?" Kit-Kat asks.

Chris frowns. "Yeah, maybe."

"That doesn't seem very special…" Aaron sighs, his shoulders slumped. "We should have a super-big totally new challenge for the finale!"

"You wouldn't even _know _if the challenges were new or not, numbnuts," Lola says, rolling her eyes. "Since we've never _done _them."

"I'd know in my heart!" Aaron warbles.

"I'd need time to put something together," Chris says. "Although, if it'd get you guys—mostly you stupid pirates—off of my show, then I guess it'd be worth it." Chris smirks. "You'd better be prepared for some seriously injury-inducing challenges, dudes and dudettes. Heck, you've asked for it. Literally."

"Well, I don't know about asking for the injuries," Seth comments, hesitantly.

Riley S. grins. "That part goes without saying." Seth nods.

"Give me three hours," Chris announces, slowly walking away from the crowd of contestants. "And I'll have something ready for you." He walks a few feet, but then stops and turns to look at some of the older contestants. "Also, those who are _not_ from this season should come with me."

"I'd…rather not," Kenny remarks.

"Dude, I'd go in a windowless van before I'd go with you," Ashlynn adds, putting her hands on her hips.

"I'll give you guys bagels," Chris offers.

"…alright." Ashlynn goes to follow Chris and the other six oldest contestants (Doe, Satine, Leti, Raphael, Effie, and Kenny) go to follow them.

"What about us?" Beeper cries. "What should we do?"

"How about GO AWAY?" Chris shouts at them.

"Aw…" Beeper frowns, insulted.

"We don't need them!" Hazel exclaims, putting a hand on Beeper's shoulders. "Come, my young pirates, we're off!"

"You guys _are_ leaving?" Jack asks, dubiously.

"Yes!" Hazel replies. Her eyes become unusually large. "And you shall never, ever see us again, ever. Because we will never show up. Not at all. So goodbye forever." She and the other three pirates quickly ran in the opposite direction that Chris's group had gone to.

"You forgot your…pirate ship," Jess calls out to them, lamely. "Great. How long do you wanna bet before they come back?"

"I'll give them an hour," Aaron replies, grinning.

"Five minutes," Zane sighs. "If they're merciful."

Bren turns and faces the batch of current contestants. "So…hey! You guys are alive! That's…pretty cool."

"I missed you," Kit-Kat says, grinning at Long and giving him a quick hug.

"I missed you too. Not just for your cooking, I promise."

"Ooh, I brought some brownies, if you're hungry," Kit-Kat adds, whipping out a tray from nowhere.

"Now _that_ would've been a useful skill, while we were wandering around in the sewers," Seth notes, sighing.

Rosetta appraises Seth curiously. "How long were you guys down there?"

"_Weeks_," Logan boasts, puffing out his chest. "We had to survive off of killed alligators and—"

"It was actually only about two hours," CC points out. Logan jumps, surprised at the sound of her voice.

"Crap!" he shouts. "How do you keep doing that?" CC peers over her camera to look at Logan.

"You're supposed to not notice us, I guess. Oh! I should set up the confession cam again! I bet it's out of batteries by now…" CC dashes off.

**(Confession Cam: We're back, baby!)**

** Demi: **"I kinda missed this thing." _(Waves, cheerfully.)_

**Chelsea: **"Man, this is going to be crazy. There's fourteen of us left and we're already deciding a winner. It's gonna be a hell of a challenge. Or…Chris is gonna wimp out and have us do something like a pie-eating contest."

**Zane: **"I'm keeping my expectations low for this "big final challenge". So, either I'm right, or pleasantly surprised. Being a cynic has its advantages."

**CC: **"Oh my gosh, so…it's probably bad that I'm in here. I'm filming myself! This is so exciting! Oh, right the challenge. That's cool too. I guess."

**Aaron: **_(Is holding the stolen One Direction poster and grinning gleefully) _"SCORE!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

A couple hours later, this season's contestants have gathered in the bleachers in front of the island's stage. Chris has called them there and is now strutting around the stage with a wicked grin on his face. "Ladies and gentlemen, dudes and dudettes…" he begins. "Are you ready to begin the final…_thirteen part challenge?_"

"_What_," Zane says, flatly.

"Thirteen parts?" Jess exclaims, a bit more vociferous. "Why not just have thirteen challenges then?"

"Because that'd mean thirteen more episodes, and by the looks of things, you'd all be _dead_ by then," Chris answers dryly. "Anyway, thirteen parts! And obviously, they won't be going by at the same rate as a normal challenge so…some of you might get kicked off a little unceremoniously. But that's the price you'll have to pay for getting me to do this stupid thing."

"_How _unceremoniously?" Damion asks, cautiously.

"Well, no marshmallow ceremonies. And it's pretty likely that your elimination will culminate in a bodily injury."

"As per usual," Long remarks.

"Anyway – let's get this show on the road, shall we?" Chris asks, grinning. "Let part one of the super awesome finale to finally determine the winner of this stupid show commence! AKA: operation LPOotSAFtFDtWotSSC!"

"Huh. _Estoy impresionada_," Glisa remarks.

Chris hops down from his place on the stage and appraises the crowd of contestants. "Alright, the fourteen of you that are actually in this mess – get your butts down here." They climb down and wait for more directions. "Here's the deal, we've got the seven older contestants—"

"We _really _need a better way to refer to them," Riley S. interrupts. "Current contestants, old contestants, and old_er_ contestants isn't really going to cut it."

"Alright, alright," Chris mutters. "You, current contestants, will be called campers. The old contestants from this show will be called the exiles. And the oldest campers will be called veterans. Capiche?"

Lacey shrugs. "Good enough."

"Exile, huh?" Demi muses from the stands. "Suddenly I feel more…badass."

"PART ONE!" Chris exclaims. "The seven veterans are hiding. They each have a letter on their arm that they'll write on your arm once you find them. Get all seven letters, and then decipher the meaning. Unless it's, by chance, already in the right order. More will be revealed when the first person decodes the message. Anyway: GO, GO, GO!" he shouts, waving the campers away. They scurry off in all directions to find the veterans. Chris grins at the exiles sitting on the stands. "And you guys are going to help me with something _else_."

"Can I pass?" Riley F. asks, raising his hand. "I was kind of determined to not do any work today whatsoever."

"Too bad. Everybody who helps out gets a donut."

Riley pumps a fist and grins. "Aw, that's not so bad then,"

"Except for Riley, because he's a little whiner."

Riley scowls. "Screw you, McClain."

"Negative _one_ donuts for Mr. Fox, now."

"What the hell does that even mean?" Riley scoffs in disbelief.

"Negative _two_. I can do this all day."

"AGHRGDF—" Riley begins, but Rosetta shushes him, so he crosses his arms and just mutters angry curses as Chris waves the exiles on to follow him.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

**(Commence Challenge Number One: The Seven Deadly Veterans)**

"Wait, wait, wait—" Seth says, as he runs with Riley S. "Are we competing to finish this first or just not finish this _last_? If it's the latter, then we just have to be faster than the slowest person on this group."

"You realize we _are_ officially competing against each other, don't you?" Riley remarks, grinning at him.

Seth rubs his neck, flustered. "Oh, yeah, well…I just figured you might want to—

" Riley cuts him off with a quick kiss. Seth's features flush bright red for a moment and he is grinning goofily when Riley pulls away.

"Once we're down to the last five or so, it's no more Ms. Nice Gamer Girl," Riley warns him.

"Don't think you can just trip me up with a kiss, you know," Seth responds, raising an eyebrow.

"HA!" Riley grins and skips ahead of him.

"What? I'm serious!"

"Sure, sure. Keep telling yourself that."

()()()()()()()()()()

"I've never been very good at this," Sienna mutters, as she wanders through the outskirts of the Wawanakwa forest. "Uh…" she sighs and pauses, scouring the trees in the hopes of maybe seeing someone hiding within the branches. "Marco?"

"POLO!" Leti practically screams, making Sienna temporarily flip-her-shit and fall over.

"Wrong game, Leti!" Kenny hisses, also close by. Sienna brushes some of the dirt off of her skirt and stands up, hesitantly going towards the source of the noise. Sure enough, both Leti and Kenny are standing on the opposite end of a tree with a particularly thick trunk.

"Wow," Sienna says cynically, propping her elbow up against the wood. "You guys are _pros_."

Kenny scowls, grabs her arms, and writes two letters on them. E and L. "Just go away, please."

()()()()()()()()()()()

Jess casually slinks down by the beach, listening close for any signs of rustling. There are a few overturned canoes on the sand, and she curiously kicks a few. She hears a frightened yelp when she kicks one of the canoes, so she turns that one over and sees that Satine's hiding under it.

Jess grins. "Sorry about that. Why'd you freak out?"

"Ahh," Satine groans. "Post-Traumatic Chef Disorder. Last time I was on the show he found me here he sprayed me with an Uber-Soaker."

"Uber-Soaker?"

"It's like a Super-Soaker but…uber."

"Right. Duh. So, why'd you hide in the same place? Not that I would've known, but…"

Satine's shoulders slump. "I tried to go in the woods…but oh my gosh, it was horrible…I was just on the outskirts of them…but then I saw it…it was horrible…I wouldn't recommend going in there." Unfortunately, Jess spaced out somewhere during the middle of that warning and is currently daydreaming about skateboarding on the back of a robotic dinosaur.

"Sorry, what?" Jess asks, once she realizes the lull in the conversation.

Satine sighs, dismally. "Nothing. Want me to give you the letter?" Jess nods and Satine writes an O on her arm. "There you go."

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Damn it!" Arlen howls, sprinting after a certain insane redhead. "Once I find you, you're supposed to STAY! STILL!"

"I cannot be contained!" Effie cries.

"But you can be outran!" Chelsea declares, running ahead of Arlen and towards the redhead.

Effie turns around and grins and Chelsea whilst running backwards. "COME AT ME, BRO!"

**()()()()()()()()()()**

"It was an honest mistake, really!" Leti whines, stomping her foot as a frustrated Kenny writes an E and an L on Damion's arm.

"After the fifth time," Kenny mutters, "I really have to wonder."

"Well…thanks," Damion says, uncertainly. Feeling awkward, he runs off.

()()()()()

"Aren't you kind of supposed to be hiding?" Lacey asks, coolly appraising the nerdy fellow sitting in plain sight on a mess hall table.

"I went inside," Raphael replies, distractedly. He's messing around with his weird blue laptop, again. "That's…a little effort."

"Do I want to know what you're doing?" Lacey wonders, trying to sneak around him to get a look at the screen. Abruptly, Raphael snaps the laptop shut.

"No!" he exclaims, a little panicked. "No, definitely not."

"Uh…alright, dude."

"I'm not crazy, I promise."

"Sure, sure. Can I have your letter?"

"What? Oh, yeah. Sure." Raphael scribbles an O on her arm.

"Hm…I already got an O from Satine," Lacey muses.

"Some words have repeating letters. Crazy shit happens."

Lacey crosses her arms. "You realize how easily I could pick you up and throw you out the window, right?"

Raphael chuckles, dismissively. "You'll have to get in line."

Lacey grins. "Alright, I'm leaving. Peace, little dude." Raphael smiles and nods at her as she exits the mess hall.

"And _that_," Ashlynn says, popping up from her hiding spot underneath the table. "Is motherflipping teamwork, Raph." The two exchange a quick fist bump and Ashlynn takes a seat next to Raphael on the table. "What are you doing, anyway? You can tell me, right?"

"Well…" Raphael hesitates, but the nods. "Yeah. Alright. I found this laptop in the water when we crashed, and I think it has some…reality-warping properties."

"Ah."

"You seem rather unfazed by this revelation."

Ashlynn winks at him. "What can I say? Crazy shit happens. Do you know how to use it?"

"If I did," Raphael sighs, "I'd be a foot taller and far, far away from here. With you, of course." Ashlynn hooks an arm around his shoulder and draws him closer to her.

"Of course," she agrees. "So what are you doing on there now?"

"Well…" Raphael squints at the screen. "This might sound…really stupid, but I think that Chris might have a—"

_CRRRRRASH!_

Effie and Chelsea run fly through one of the mess hall's windows and roll on the floor for a good few feet or so.

"HOLY CRAP!" Ashlynn shouts. "Are you guys okay?"

"Ugh…" Chelsea mutters, but holds up a thumb. "Can I get my letter now?"

"You get three, I guess," Raphael muses.

"Totally…" Chelsea grunts and staggers upwards. "Worth it." She holds out a hand and helps a very dizzy Effie up, making sure to hold on tightly to the redhead's arm. "Alright, crazy girl, give me a…"

"Y!" Effie cheers, and writes the sometimes-vowel on Chelsea's arm with a sharpie.

"Everyone alright?" Damion asks, peering into the Chelsea-and-Effie shaped hole in the mess hall window. "I'd be more panicked about this, but crashing through a window on this show is like stubbing a toe, so…oh, wow, veterans."

"Crap, I forgot to hide!" Ashlynn sighs.

"How many do you have, Damion?" Chelsea asks him, rather generously holding onto the still-struggling Effie for him.

"Two from Kenny and Leti, one from Satine, one from Effie…" he meanders over towards Raphael and Ashlynn and they write their letters on his arm for him. "And now two from these two guys."

"You're only one letter away!" Chelsea remarks, finally letting go of Effie. The redhead immediately crashes through the wall and keeps running.

"The door was literally right there," Damion mutters, pointing at the mess hall double doors. "Okay…who's the one veteran I'm missing?"

"Doe," Ashlynn answers. Damion nods as a thanks and then runs off.

"Wait!" Chelsea shouts after him. "Damn it, you were supposed to help me cheat!"

"Cheaters never prosper," Raphael reminds her.

Chelsea growls at him. "I will throw you through a window, little man!"

"That is a _remarkably_ popular threat today," Raphael mutters.

()()()()()()()()

Zane stares dismally at the cheerful pink note in his hand. There's a sort message on it, created in the traditional "ransom note" style, with letters cut out of a magazine and sloppily glued together. It read:

**zAne:**

** yOu alREAdY lOSt TO eFFiE, nOW iT's timE fOr you TO taKe oN ME…i'll BE oN the MeSS hAll rOoF.**

** - dOeReNdA **

Zane sighs. "If I lost to Crazy One, why would Crazy Two still want to fight me?"

"Because she's…crazy?" Zarya suggests.

"I suppose you're not going to help me with this, then," Zane remarks, sullenly.

"I'll be there for moral support. Maybe if she knocks you out I can still get a letter from her."

"I wonder if Long would be willing to help…" Zane muses, looking around now.

Zarya shakes her head. "Doubtful. I saw him, Aaron, Arlen, and Glisa all chasing after Crazy One."

"Great. Should we go, then?"

"Let's."

The two trek up to the ladder behind the mess hall and climb up it. Doe is standing behind the small chimney, obscuring herself from anyone looking at the mess hall from the front.

"Zane…" Doe says ominously. "I've been watching you."

"Yeah, that's kind of what happens when you're on a reality show."

"No, I – damn it, you're messing up my speech! Anyway, since you lost to Effie, you must prove your worth by challenging…me."

Zane crosses his arms. "Look, I found you, doesn't that mean you're supposed to just…give me the letter so I can go?" Doe grins and wags an orange marker in front of his face.

"There is only one way to victory," Doe warns. "And that is through me."

"I still have no idea what the hell you want from me!" Zane complains, flustered. "Are you expecting a fight, or a rap-off, or what? You're being really annoyingly vague!"

Doe tosses something at him and Zane catches it, much to his own surprise. He looks down at it and groans.

"A Nerf gun. Again? Please don't tell me this is your friend's modified ones."

Doe just grins.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"This challenge is so _boring_," Sienna sighs, as she and Lacey trek through the campgrounds, looking for the veterans. They had met up about a scene or two ago and decided to team up. "We've barely found any action at all."

"You know that's a trigger for basically setting off a bunch of shit, right?" Lacey deadpans.

Sienna cocks an eyebrow up. "Um. What?"

_FOOM_.

A sudden explosion knocks the girls on their butts. They both gape as they finally see that the mess hall has almost completely been destroyed. Zane and Doe are remarkably uninjured, but very dizzy and are keeping each other from falling over to the ground.

"YOU SEE?" Zane hollers at her, awkwardly hitting her with his fists. "That's why you don't use modified Nerf guns!"

"Um…" Sienna hedges, eyes wide.

"Uh-oh. Three feet back," Lacey warns, and the two girls scoot back just in time to avoid Effie getting tackled by Aaron, Long, Arlen, and Glisa.

"DID WE WIN?" Glisa yells.

"Err…" Sienna still can't find her words; Lacey is just shaking her head to herself.

"Where's Logan?" she wonders, looking around. Just in time, Logan staggers towards the girls and plops down beside them.

"Chelsea—told me—a veteran—was on—the Thousand Foot Cliff—" he pants, clearly pissed off. Sienna stifles a giggle.

**(Confession Cam: We don't approve of that sort of behavior…unless it's directed towards Logan)**

** Chelsea—**_(Shrugs.) _"I was bored, and his face was bothering me."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh, hey!" Damion says, wandering onto the scene towards Doe. "There you are. Can I have that last letter?" Doe groans, whips out her marker and writes the final letter on Damion's arm. "Thanks!" Doe just groans and stumbles away, dragging a screaming and protesting Effie with her.

Damion sits down and starts staring at the letters, trying to figure out what the anagram was. Doe and Zane took the opportunity to collapse.

"I…" Damion scowls, after a few minutes.

"What is it?" Lacey calls out. Curious, she and Sienna get up and walk over towards Damion.

"CHRIS!" Damion shouts. "Tell me this isn't what I think it is!"

"C'mon, spill, what is it?" Sienna asks.

Damion groans and puts his hand to his forehead. "Either this message just called me a sole, which makes no sense, or…"

"Or it spells out 'YOU LOSE'," Sienna finishes.

A grinning Chris walks onto the scene.

"Chris, c'mon man, are you serious?" Arlen asks, glaring at the host. "This is stupid."

**(Confession Cam: Have we started disappointing readers yet?)**

** Zane—**"Let me be frank: when _Arlen_ says you're being stupid, you know you did something that's _pretty goddamn stupid_."

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Does this honestly mean you're kicking me off?" Damion asks Chris in disbelief.

Chris nods. "'Fraid so, buddy. At least you don't have to go anywhere, you just join the crowd of exiles."

Damion slaps his forehead. "Great. Well, good luck you guys. Just make sure to lose every challenge and I'm sure you'll be _fine_."

"Are all the challenges going to be this underhanded?" Long asks, frowning.

"No promises," Chris answers, shrugging. "Anyway, we're ready for challenge two, so…"

"No break?" Glisa groans, panting. "_Estoy cansada_…"

"C'mon, we're wasting daylight!" Chris exclaims, walking away from the crowd and towards the beach.

"Sorry, buddy," Aaron says, helping Damion up from the ground and giving him one of those one-clasp bro-hug things. "I'll make sure to do something annoying to Chris."

"Thanks," Damion laughs, grinning. "Well, I guess I'll be cheering you guys on from the sidelines."

"Let's GO!" Chris calls out from the distance, impatiently.

"Sorry," Jess says to Damion, grinning at him. "Catch you later, dude."

Damion waves at them as they run off.

"So…" Damion says to himself, looking around. "Uh…where do I go now? HELLO? Guys? Exiles? Veterans? Err…pirates?" Damion pauses, and then his eyes light up. "Hey, CC!"

"Hi!" CC pops up from behind the camera, again.

"How the heck do you do that?" Damion wonders, shaking his head to himself.

"It's part of the job!"

"But are you the only cameraman around?"

"I don't know."

"Why don't you know?"

"I'm pretty sure that all the other cameramen are ninjas. Or mythical creatures where like, like—they'll only come out if you call they're called by their true name."

"Huh."

"Or they're dead."

"WHAT?" Damion splutters.

"Nothing!"

()()()()()()()()()()()()

"Oh hey, I think I know where we're going!" Jess remarks, as the group of campers and Chris reach a certain part of the beach. "This is where me and Rose went to go to that spy building! Is that what we're doing?"

"You'll see," is all Chris says. There's a rickety boat that the campers file into, and Chris climbs in and drives the boat to a smaller island farther into the lake.

"Well, that was rather anticlimactic," Jess snarks. "It _is_ the island I was talking about."

"Chris is contractually obligated to be as pointlessly over-dramatic as possible," Riley S. tells her.

"We're not doing that spy challenge again, are we?" Jess asks Chris. Chris shakes his head. The group walks over to one side of the building and see two doors, one red and one blue.

"Hm…you're splitting us up, Chris?" Zane surmises. He's still covered in soot, but seems to have recovered his composure.

"Now what gave you that idea?" Chris asks, innocently. Zane raises an eyebrow, and Chris sighs. "Yeah, yeah. We're splitting up. You guys are going to be back in teams, but not your old ones, since otherwise it would be six versus eight. So, I'll be dividing you into…"

"Red Vs. Blue?" Riley asks, grinning widely.

"Yeah. Alright, so Red Team: Riley, Glisa, Chelsea, Lola, Zane, Zarya, and Sienna. Blue Team: Seth, Jess, Aaron, Long, Arlen, Logan, and Lacey. Go through your separate doors and I'll give you more directions from there."

"Why are the two smart people on the same team?" Logan complains, pointing at Zane and Zarya, who exchange awkward glances.

"Because…screw you, that's why," Chris answers, jovially walking away from the two groups who reluctantly enter their separate doors to see what awaits them inside.

()()()()()()()()

**(Commence Challenge Number Two: I Like Big Buttons and I Cannot Lie)**

Inside, the two rooms were identical (not that the campers knew this, a wall divided the two teams). Both rooms were almost completely barren and made out of some dark stone. There were two red buttons high up on the opposing walls to their left and right. Also around were some miscellaneous and seemingly mundane things, like boxes and chairs. Across from the entrance was a closed steel door with a red light above it.

"Okay…instructions, please?" Seth asks, hopefully.

_"Yeah, I guess…_" Chris sighs from an intercom. "_It's pretty simple, though. If you touch the two buttons simultaneously, that light will turn green. Exit through that door to win. Get it?"_

"Actually—" Lola began.

_"GREAT! Best of luck, campers!"_

Lola scowls. "Jerk. Anyway, let's figure this thing out, huh?"

"How much force do you think needs to be applied to the buttons?" Long wonders. "The buttons are rather large…" A scowling Arlen jumps up and down underneath the button, swiping at it in the hopes of hitting it.

"I have a feeling that's not gonna work," Seth calls out to Arlen.

"Just—a little—more!" Arlen gasps. Seth shrugs and turns towards the others.

"We probably need to stack up that stuff to actually reach the button," he remarks, gesturing towards the pile of random chairs and boxes. "There's not much, though…"

()()()()()()()()

"BLUE TEAM HOOOOO—" Chelsea shouts, running towards the button with Glisa on her shoulders. Chelsea jumps and Glisa swipes at the button, but they don't even get close to it. "Aw, damn it!"

"Alright," Zane says, walking with Zarya around the pile of random junk that their room has. "Can we make a safe…ladder of sorts, out of these things?"

"I'm not sure if safe is a concern," Zarya replies. She smiles. "Just so long as it works long enough for the button to be pressed."

"Would you be saying that if you're the one who has to climb it?" Zane deadpans.

"Irrelevant. I am not climbing it. I am far too weak for any button-pressing shenanigans."

"That's a load of bullcrap. You're the strongest, smartest person on this show."

"Flattery won't work, Zane. I'm still not climbing it."

"Darn," Zane sighs.

"But thank you anyway," Zarya adds, smiling.

"You guys got a clue what we're gonna do?" Lola asks, walking up to the duo.

"Yeah…kind of," Zane answers. "It seems clear that we need to make a makeshift ladder out of these things but…"

Lola puts her hands on her hips. "But?"

"I'm not sure we have enough…junk," Zane replies, hesitantly. "But let's make this ladder and see where that gets us."

()()()()()()()()()

"And…jenga," Lacey growls, as the Red Team's ladder collapses yet again. Aggravated, she picks up one of the fallen chairs. "Great. That's just great."

"Maybe we aren't supposed to make a ladder," Jess suggests.

"Then what are we supposed to do?" Logan asks, frowning.

"Lose?" Aaron suggests, dryly. "I'm sure if we open that door it'll just end up with us falling into a pit of alligators, or something. And then we'll all get booted off," he adds, still pissed off over Damion's recent elimination.

Glisa shudders. "I've had enough of creepy retiles, yo creo…"

"What if the buttons don't really require that much force to activate?" Long suggests. "We could just throw something at it and see if it works."

Arlen picks up a chair and throws it at the button. Nothing happens, but the chair shatters into wooden shards that fall to the ground unceremoniously.

"I didn't—" Long sighs. "I meant something like a shoe, not something that will shatter and break."

Arlen laughs, nervously. "Whoops."

"That is a shoddily built chair," Jess observes, picking up a shard. "Well, now what?"

()()()()()()()()()()()

"Careful…steady…agh!" Chelsea falls forward from the Blue Team's ladder and smacks into the button. The button lights up for about two seconds and then powers down again.

"Ow…" Chelsea groans, lying facedown on the floor. "What the—you guys didn't even try to hit the second button! I just did a freaking faceplant for nothing!"

"Well," Zane says, "we know now that the button requires a decent amount of force to activate. And it has a two-second delay."

"So, basically, that's Zane's way of saying you did a faceplant…for SCIENCE!" Sienna finishes, with a dramatic flourish of her hands.

"We don't have enough stuff to make a second ladder," Lola observes.

"Human pyramid?" Riley suggests.

"Not enough people," Zane replies. "And human pyramids are stupid."

"Nyeh." Riley sticks her tongue out at him.

Zane sighs and places his hands over his eyes, trying to focus.

"Chris is setting up these challenges…" he mutters to himself. "What is he looking for, here? We're not going to get injured in this room…"

"Uh, HELLO?" Chelsea complains, insulted.

"Not _that_ injured," Zane remedies. "It can't be that entertaining to watch this…there's some twist that we don't know about. Like…like…damn it, I don't know."

"What did Chris say, exactly?" Zarya asks him. "When giving the instructions?"

"Um…" Zane begins. "Press the two buttons simultaneously to make that light turn green. Exit the door to win the game. He…oh my God. Oh, you've _got_ to be kidding me." Zane jogs over to the door with the red light over it and turns the handle. It swings right open.

"_Congratulations_," Chris announces, over the intercom. _"BLUE TEAM WINS!"_

()()()()()()()

"So the door was open the entire time," Logan deadpans. "Great, McClain. M. Night Shyamalan would be proud."

"How is that fair? You said that we had to press the buttons at the same time to get the door to open," Jess complains.

"No," Chris replies. "I said that pressing the buttons at the same time would make the light turn green, and then I said that you exit through the door to win. I never said that the door was locked, or that making the light turn green and leaving the door were two connected things."

"So, what happens now?" Long asks. "You said there wouldn't be any marshmallow eliminations, so who gets kicked off for this challenge?"

"A rapid-fire elimination," Chris answers. "You can cast your votes in the Confession Cam and we'll go from there!"

"The Confession Cam is on the opposite side of the lake," Lacey points out, dryly.

"Oh yeah. I guess…um…Red Team, close your eyes!"

"Um…what are we doing?" Aaron asks, confused.

"Anyone who's voting for Seth, raise your hand!"

**(Confession Cam: We're rolling our eyes too)**

** Lacey—**"Yup, we went full-fledged _kindergarten-style _voting for that elimination. Chris even warned us not to peek and everything."

**Aaron—**_(Cackling evilly) _"He told me not to peak but I TOTALLY DID."

()()()()()()()()()

"Alright, open your eyes!" Chris exclaims. "The one who is going home (except not really going home, just staying here and no longer participating in this competition) is…

...

…

…

Arlen!"

Arlen gapes at Chris, then sighs and shakes his head.

"All because I broke a stupid chair?" he asks his team, in disbelief.

"And then proceeded to break all the other ones," Seth adds, half-heartedly. "And then you built a fort with the cardboard boxes."

"Are you kidding me? The fort was freaking awesome," Logan protests. He gives his buddy a quick fist-bump. "Sorry, bro. It's been hella awesome hanging with you."

Arlen grins. "Same, dude. We should hang sometime after the show. There are a _lot_ of hot chicks in my neighborhood…"

"He's just not allowed to come within fifty-feet of any of them," Chelsea snarks, grinning at Arlen and ruffling his hair. "I'll be honest, I'll miss you, you doofus."

"Nothing stopping _us_ from hanging out too," Arlen says, grinning at Chelsea.

Chelsea smirks. "We'll see, hotshot."

"Enough goodbyes!" Chris shouts, annoyed. "We've got eleven challenges left, still!" The campers wave goodbye to Arlen and get back in the boat to go with Chris.

It takes Arlen about three minutes to realize that they just left him dumped on the island there.

"Uh…" he says. "Huh. Back to Fort Arlen, I guess."

()()()()()()()()()()

"Well," Chris says cheerfully, as he pulls up to the shore. "That was a fun brain-teaser, now wasn't it?"

"That wasn't a brain-teaser," Zane mutters. "That was a stupid twist that was only present because of your incompetently given directions."

"But," Chris continues, ignoring Zane. "Now we're moving to the more…_physical_ side of things."

Zane blanches. "I'd rather go back to the cheap twists, please."

"Too late!" Chris laughs. "Here's what we're doing, and I can tell you now…it's _very_ simple. You'll be running to this island's gym. Inside the gym are a variety of weapons. You get to pick _one_ so…first come, first serve."

"Is this a homage to the _Hunger Games_?" Seth asks, curiously.

"Oh my gosh, I love that book!" Sienna exclaims, fanning her hands excitedly. "Especially Gale in the movies…_sooo_ hot." Beside her, Logan unconvincingly puffs up his chest in an attempt to come off as more muscular.

"Guys! Back on me!" Chris shouts, annoyed. "No, this is not a stupid homage. Now…go and run to the gym before all the good weapons are taking!" The group of campers bolts away.

()()()()()()()()()

**(Commence Challenge Number Three: "A Nihilist With a Dodgeball") **

Glisa, Logan, Lacey, Zarya, and Long were the first group of people to reach the gym.

"Whoa!" Lacey says, as they step inside and take a look around. The gym is covered in obstacles: ramps, small walls that pivot in a complete circle, ladders, and some random junk that seem to be there only to trip up those walking around. Neatly in the center of the gym is a pile of miscellaneous weapons. "These are…not what I expected." The pile includes everything from a plastic lightsaber to a slightly browning banana.

"Dibs on de lightsaber!" Glisa shouts, diving towards the pile and grabbing a short and green luminescent lightsaber. "Haha, YES!" Long hesitantly picks up a Nerf gun.

"These better not be the ones Doe was using…" he mutters. He inspects it closely, and then nods with relief when he sees that the bullets in there are completely normal.

"Great, well…" Lacey muses, sifting through the weapons. "Plastic nunchucks it is."

"Do you know how to use those?" Logan asks, as he picks up an also-plastic ninja sword.

Lacey grins. "Not a clue."

Zarya picks up a dodgeball and spins it in her hands, experimentally. The other campers trudge in then, and rush towards the weapon piles in the hopes of finding something useful. Seth groans in complaint on seeing the nunchucks are taken, and instead picks up a big inflatable mallet.

"Right," he says, halfheartedly. "Let's…wreck some shit?"

A joyous Jess picks up a skateboard, Riley sighs and picks up a pool noodle, Aaron eventually grabs an umbrella, Chelsea picks up a stick with a horse head mounted on it (not a real horse, jeez, this isn't _The Godfather_), a disappointed Lola picks up a cookbook, Sienna picks up a dustpan and scowls, and Zane (to nobody's surprise whatsoever) gets stuck with the banana.

"_Alright, you've all got your weapons?"_ Chris asks, via intercom.

"Crap," Logan says, jumping at the noise. "Does that dude have speakers set up _everywhere_?"

_"Anyway, the rules are simple! First…see those boxes in the corner?" _The campers hadn't noticed, but there are some cardboard boxes in one corner of the gym. _"You need to slip those babies on_."

"Aw man," Seth groans. "We have to wear uniforms?"

"Looks like dey aren't so bad," Glisa says, once they reach the boxes and open them up. "Dey are _solamente…_hm…vests are the word, si?"

"Sort of like something you would wear in paintball," Long observes. They are simple enough: they zip in the front and are made out of some shimmering material. When the campers all got their vests on, the shiny material started to glow a soft green.

_"Anyway, for most of the time these vests will be lit like this. If you get hit, the vest will flash red and you'll be invulnerable for a few seconds until the suit turns green again. After five hits, you are O-U-T out! Capiche?"_

"That's simple enough," Riley agrees.

"_Then let's go! Or rather, you go. I'll stay here in my comfy, air-conditioned room…eating ice-cream and—"_

"We GET it; you're a lazy bastard," Lacey groans, shaking her nunchucks at the omnipresent voice of the host. "Can we START already?"

_"Sheesh, fine. Go, go, go!"_ A siren blares through the gym and the campers yell and scatter.

"Chris, what do we do if our weapons totally blow?" Lola shouts at the ceiling.

_"Wing it!" _Chris answers, cackling.

"You stupid—" Lola starts, but is cut off when she gets bopped by Seth's mallet.

"Uh…sorry!" Seth says, and bolts away.

"GET BACK HERE, FUJIMOTO!" Lola roars, brandishing her cookbook in the most terrifying way one can brandish a cookbook.

"Where's your weapon, Zane?" Long asks nearby, hesitant to attack the defenseless friend of his.

Zane show him the banana peel. "I ate it," he deadpans.

"Well…sorry about this," Long says, and quickly shoots Zane.

"Not a problem," Zane sighs, as his suit flashes red.

"All these apologetic attackers…" Zarya muses, from her perch atop one of the rotating walls. She hits Lola from the back with her dodgeball. The red rubber ball ricochets back miraculously into Zarya's hands, and Lola faceplants into the ground again. "I feel no sorrow for what I do here."

"Well, you're a regular nihilist with a dodgeball," Lacey deadpans before jumping up and whapping Zarya in the back with her nunchucks. "But maybe you shouldn't pick a spot to perch where everyone can see you." Zarya scowls at first, but then smiles.

"I enjoy a challenge," she murmurs, before running off.

Lacey sighs and inspects the nunchucks in her hands.

"Still not sure how to wield these things," she remarks. "I'm just asking for a stupid slapstick gag with this…" Seeing Aaron on the other side of her, she quickly kicks the rotating wall so it smacks him in the face. "Okay, that was a bit of a low blow. Sorry 'bout that, Aaron."

"Actually, that was a very high blow," Aaron sighs. He taps the side of his head. "Yea high, in fact." Lacey grins and smacks the side of his vest with her nunchucks. "Oh you better run, Lacey," Aaron threatens as is suit flashes red, grinning. "Before I wreck your stuff with my Hello Kitty umbrella."

"Ah yes, I'm terrified," Lacey laughs. "I don't think—" before she can finish, Aaron bolts upward and jabs her in the side with the aforementioned umbrella. "Okay…" Lacey concedes. "That was smart."

Aaron bows, and then runs off for slight fear of his life.

"LOGAN!" Riley calls out, from the opposite side of the room. Logan turns and grins at the gamer girl. "Let's finish what we started back in Hummingbird Hollow, hm?"

"You kidding me?" Logan mocks her. "Your flimsy little noodle against my ninja sword? HYA!" He lashes out and swipes at her noodle, but all that accomplishes is…well, nothing really. The noodle just wobbles a bit.

"It's plastic, you dingus," Riley deadpans. "Now…" she grins. "Where doing it man. Where MAKING THIS HAPEN." She gives the camera a sidelong glance. "And before you ask, yes, those typos were intentional."

"…what?" Logan asks, bewildered.

"NOTHING!" Riley shouts. "Let's go already!" The two ran towards each-other, slo-mo, horribly impractical weapons drawn high as they leapt towards each other for their confrontation…

And the camera quickly pans to Sienna, who is staring blankly at the dustpan in her hands.

"Okay, seriously," she says to nobody in particular. "What the _heck_ am I supposed to do with this?" Glisa walks up to her and Sienna throws her hands in the air. "Screw it! Go for it, Glisa! Free target! It's not like I can fight back, no, not with my ALMIGHTY DUSTPAN!"

"I…uh…" Glisa backs up and nervously walks away. "I'll just…leave you be."

Sienna gapes at her, and then beams. "Wow, that WORKED!"

That's when Seth took the opportunity to hit Sienna with his mallet, unfortunately. Sienna turns towards him slowly, a death glare in his eyes.

"OH GOD WHY DID I DO THAT," Seth warbles, before sprinting away from the _other_ queen bee who probably wants to cut his head off with a toothbrush. Meanwhile, Jess zooms by the two of them on her skateboard, with Chelsea in hot pursuit.

"You can't beat me when I'm on this thing!" Jess laughs at her. "You can't hit what you can't catch, stupid!"

"Oh…oh yeah?" Chelsea shouts in response.

Jess turns her head to look at her. "Wow, are you that low on comebacks today? That was just—" Jess crashes into the side of one of the ramps on the floor and falls off of her skateboard with an _OOF_. Chelsea stands over her, grinning, and jabs her once in the chest with the butt of her staff.

"Better to play the part of the stupid person then to be the stupid person you…stupid person," Chelsea taunts, very ineffectually.

"Holy crap. I think I lost a few IQ points just listening to that sentence," Jess grunts. Chelsea rolls her eyes and quickly hits a nearby Zane in the side without even breaking eye contact with Jess.

"And that's five," Zane sighs. "Good night, everybody." He unceremoniously tosses his banana peel on the floor.

"DAMN IT!" Lola's angry cry signifies her last hit as well, dealt by a still-rather-flustered Glisa. Across from them, Seth was nearing his twentieth hit.

"OW! SIENNA! THAT'S! ENOUGH! I ALREADY! LOST!" Seth howls.

**(Confession Cam: Almost as deadly as a feather duster)**

** Seth—**_(Shivering) _"Who knew a dustpan could be deadly?"

()()()()()()()()

"Ha-HA!" Jess bolts up and smacks an unsuspecting Chelsea in the vest with her skateboard. Chelsea gasps, insulted, and hits Jess once again with her horse toy.

"Hey! That's not fair!" Jess complains.

"What are you talking about; you totally blind-sided me first!"

"Only because you hit me first!"

The two girls' vests faded back to green and they hit each other instantly again.

"Oh, come on, why'd you do that again?"

"What—you did it too!"

"Only because you did it first!"

"I did not! You totally started it!"

This goes on until both girls are at their fourth hit. Finally, Long sneaks up behind them and picks them both off with his Nerf gun. They look down at their permanently red vests and groan.

_"Losers need to wait outside_," Chris adds, quickly, and those with no more hits leave the gym.

"Oh, crap," he mutters. "Out of ammo." He stands up and instantly gets knocked down by one of Zarya's dodgeballs. Zarya runs forward to grab the ball, and then ducks behind one of the platforms to hit Glisa. Having been hit several times by Long's sniping, this last hit is her fifth and she is forced to leave the gym.

"How am I still here?" Sienna wonders. Exhausted from hitting Seth repeatedly with a dustpan, she realizes that she hasn't done anything tactual yet. Then again, she has a dustpan, so her options are kind of limited. And by kind of limited, we mean that she really had very little chance of winning with a dustpan.

"Beats me," Lacey quips, before casually hitting her friend with the nunchucks. "I'm all for unconventional weapons, but a dustpan? Yeah, not so badass."

"Behind you," Sienna warns. Lacey whips the nunchucks behind her and hits Glisa in the vest.

"Aw," Glisa sighs. "Dat was my fifth hit."

"What hit are you on?" Lacey asks Sienna.

"Fourth, I think. How about you?"

Lacey cracks a grin. "Goose egg." Her grin fades when a Nerf dart hits her vest from nowhere. "I thought you were out of ammo, Long!"

"I threw that," Long says mildly, from the other end of the room.

Lacey raises an eyebrow. "I should be surprised by that, but I'm not. Anyway, I should _probably _avoid being a cheap-shot and hitting you on your last shot so I'm gonna…yeah." Lacey runs off. Sienna just begins to stand up when Aaron runs over and hits her with his umbrella.

"AW YEAH!" Aaron howls, pumping his fist. "Power of the Hello Kitty!"

Sienna growls at him, and Aaron squeaks and runs away. As Sienna walks towards the exit, she witnesses the final blow of the duel between Logan and Riley…a simultaneous hit that ends both of their lives. Metaphorically. (However, death by noodle is not a laughing matter.) The disappointed duo joins Sienna through the exit door.

"Got it!" Aaron whispers, a few minutes after Sienna, Logan, and Riley left the room. Aaron has just finished picking up Long's Nerf bullets off of the ground so that the loner was truly without ammo. Now, Aaron grins triumphantly at Long. "What now?"

In response, Long throws the actual gun at Aaron's chest. It hits him and his vest flashes red permanently, signifying his final hit. Long then proceeds to walk out of the gym, nonchalantly.

"…COME ON!" Aaron cries, before reluctantly following Long outside.

And then there were two, both on their fourth hits: Lacey and Zarya. The girls stare each other down from the opposite ends of the gym, and then begin running at each other. Zarya keeps her dodgeball drawn back and Lacey holds her nunchucks in a manner that she's fairly certain is not the correct way to hold nunchucks.

About twenty feet into her sprint, Zarya trips on the banana peel and falls to her back. Lacey, surprised, picks up her speed and hits Zarya before the young loner girl can recover.

"_LACEY IS THE WINNER!" _Chris announces. Zarya groans, stands up, and irritably kicks the dodgeball with a frightening amount of force. The dodgeball crashes through the gym's wall, flies through the campground, through the Effie/Chelsea shaped hole in the mess hall, and hits Raphael in the head, who is still on his laptop.

"MOTHER FU—" Raphael begins, but is cut off as the camera switches back to the gym.

"Great!" Lacey says, pleased. "Now what?"

"_Now…you get to choose who gets sent home! Or…well…who will be joining the exiles. You'll choose who'll be exiled. Yeah, that sounds better_."

Lacey's eyebrows pop up in surprise. "What? I don't want to do that."

"Well, you have to!" Chris tells her. "Now…go to the Confession Cam and make your decision!"

"Chris, this is STUPID!" Lacey exclaims. "No matter what I do, I'm going to come off as a bad guy!"

Chris doesn't answer. Lacey covers her face with her hands and groans.

**(Confession Cam: We totally understand and respect your decision…unless you voted for us. Then you're a horrible person.)**

** Lacey—**"I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS. HOLY SHIT I DO _NOT_ WANT TO DO THIS."

**Lola—**"I might as well kiss my ass goodbye. I know Lacey liked Jack and well, now me and Jack are a thing and…" _(She shrugs.)_

**Zane—**"Oh dear GOD Zarya is going to kill me because of that stupid banana."

()()()()()()()()

"Lacey has made her decision…" Chris began ominously as the campers gathered around in front of the gym. "And the person going home is…

…

…

…

Zarya."

"I'm sorry," Lacey says instantly, turning towards Zarya. "Holy crap, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to pick anyone, but—"

"I understand," Zarya says, nodding at Zarya. "You had to pick someone. It wasn't something you wanted to do; it was just another stupid twist Chris decided to throw in. I'm not going to give you shit because you were forced to make an unpleasant decision."

"Oh, well," Lacey says, relieved. "Thanks, Zarya."

Zarya sighs. "This does not mean I have to give you a hug now, does it?"

Lacey laughs. "Uh, no. I'm not a big hug person, anyway."

"Good. Neither am I. Zane?"

Zane looks up at his sort-of girlfriend, nervously. "Yes?"

Zarya smiles at him, and Zane's heart does a triple somersault off a cliff. "May that potassium serve you well."

Zane laughs, slightly in disbelief over the silliness over her farewell. "I'm sorry I messed up your final confrontation…thing."

"It's not really your fault."

"Isn't it?"

"Alright, it is, but I was attempting to be comforting," Zarya deadpans.

"So, uh…if you guys are having a moment, we could leave or…something…" Logan remarks, awkwardly.

Zane and Zarya ignore him. Instead, Zarya pulls Zane into a kiss that has some people cheering and some people groaning in annoyance.

"Alright, alright, good times over," Chris announces. "When we come back it'll be time for PART FOUR of this finale extravaganza! After this quick commercial break!"

"This is airing live on TV, already?" Seth asks, in shock. "How is that even possi—"

Cut to black.

()()()()()()()()()

**During the break:**

"Hey," Lola says, approaching Lacey, who's splashing cold water on her face in the bathroom. "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot," Lacey replies.

"Why did you vote for Zarya? I was certain you were going to vote for me."

Lacey scowls. "Because I'd rather _not_ be the girl who lets a relationship define her entire life. You know what? I'm okay with it all. I'm not going to try to 'get revenge' against you just because you and Jack like each other. Is it disappointing to me? Yeah, probably a little. But that's life. And to get catty and bitchy over something like that is just asking for a boot to the face."

"So…" Lola says, leaning against the wall. "Why Zarya?"

Lacey scoffs. "Because that chick could probably kill us all with a pinkie if she wanted to."

Lola considers this, and then nods. "Good point."

**(A.N.) **Haha! So, that long hiatus was really just a big plan by me to do…this…yeah, nobody's going to buy that, are they…?

I was originally going to have this finale all in one go, but holy shit would that have been a long chapter. So…we'll see. The next part should actually be up…well, eventually. Not super soon, but not in that long of a time.

So, the next couple chapters will be in the same sort of vein, except there won't be a lot of exposition just…rapid fire challenges.

I'm sorry that I couldn't muster up the willpower to do this the proper way, but I hope this is okay.

Okay, so, I wrote a book and it's on the internet and available and yeah. If you want details, contact me and I'll tell you more!

If you get the chance, please review. Thank you for reading.


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